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JESSICA MAE's Journal [entries|friends|calendar]


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[12 May 2011|10:27pm]
I've always found it to be interesting when people don't use "big words" correctly. There's nothing wrong with a boring vocabulary. In my opinion, it's better than trying too hard and in the end just looking..well, wrong. Just a pet peeve.

Hiiiigh on life. [21 Mar 2011|11:35pm]
[ mood | chipper ]

I love my math class. I love that I don't like my government class but I don't care because I just love being at school. I love my new phone that will hopefully be here tomorrow. I love my family, more than any of the previous, or following, things. I love my new friend and I love coloring in our Animal Planet coloring book and baking delicious cupcakes and cheesecake. I love water and hot chocolate and pomegranate green tea. I love that my sister will be here in less than a week! I love being single and independent and freeeee. I love Satish. (Note to self: write him a letter on the back of the picture you colored for him.) I love baby Rylee sosososo much, but I do NOT love how much I miss her right now. I love fiiinally feeling like an adult. I love knowing what's right for me and making it happen. I love that I remembered I have a livejournal to write down all the things I love so I can look back on it when I'm having one of those days where I feel like I hate everyone and everything. I love the jacuzzi and I will love the pool once they start heating it this week. I love popsicles and yogurt and strawberries. I love truth. I love exercising. I love rekindling old friendships from waaaayyy back in the day, so far back that I was only about four feet tall. I love my ex boyfriend and finally being able to be best friends with him again. I love my slippers. I love how annoying this probably is to anyone who is reading it but hopefully you've stopped by now. I love how everything has panned out recently to get me to this place of complete happiness. I love the weather, rain or shine. I love busy days and I love lazy days. I love that "lazy days" doesn't mean what it used to. I love my hair. I love my new thermal pajama shirts. I love that I'm going to San Francisco in a few weeks and Alaska in June and Mammoth Lakes in July. I love early mornings with vanilla roast coffee and Tom & Jerry. I love knowing who I am and being totally comfortable with it. I love playing scrabble with Jacob. I love being in control. I love tax refunds. I love my dog. I love helping family and friends and strangers. I love my intelligence and knowing that "I've got a lot to teach but even more to learn." I love that my next project will be redecorating my entire backyard/garden with Bails. I love letting go of resentment and hatred and having a light heart. I love that I can't stop smiling. I love how excited I am to wake up tomorrow even though I don't have anything that exciting planned. Last, but definitely not least, I love sleep. Goodnight moon<3


woah, long time. [10 Dec 2007|03:56pm]
i got to thinking this weekend in san diego and i can't believe who i was in highschool, or up until about a year ago actually. i mean, i guess i needed all those years of being lost and confused and blah blah blah, but everything feels so different now. and so good. i'm strong and independent and absolutely in love with myself. there's plenty more i need to work on with myself, but for now, this is enough. it's more than enough. and it's changed everything.

sometimes i still feel fucking pathetic for not being where i "should" be, but it's all a lot easier to deal with when you can look in the mirror and say "helllllll yeah you rule, baby"

ellen degeneres also helped me feel a lot better today about just kinda floating in life right now. it's on her "here and now" dvd, about procrastination and how there's really nothing wrong with it because by doing everything now and so fast, you're really only doing it because you hope at the end of your day, or your life, whatever, that you'll have this big chunk of time to do nothing because you never wasted time. well, you're not ever guaranteed that chunk of time at the end of everything so in the words of ellen, "procrastinate now, don't put it off." enjoy what's real.

think about it, we (hopefully) have our whole lives ahead of us. but in this life ahead of us comes work and great responsibility. it's not a bad thing, but do i really want to start all that so soon? when am i ever gonna get the chance again to just hang out watching movies and smoking weed and being with my friends, or even just alone for hours? yeah, maybe other people are over it by now because they're older, but 20 is not fucking "older" to me. i don't wanna be busy, i don't wanna be rushed, i want to just relax and be able to sit outside at night for an hour thinking about how crazy the stars are, or wake up in the morning and do whatever the fuck i want because nobody else gets to tell me yet. that time will come, but not now, not for me at least.
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[08 May 2007|05:31pm]
things have been fucking sweet lately!
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woooord! [26 Apr 2007|10:52pm]
The Creator gathered all of Creation and said, "I want to hide something from the humans until they are ready for it. It is the realization that they create their own reality." The eagle said, "Give it to me, I will take it to the moon." The Creator said, "No. One day they will go there and find it." The salmon said, "I will bury it on the bottom of the ocean." "No. They will go there too." The buffalo said, "I will bury it on the Great Plains." The Creator said, "They will cut into the skin of the Earth and find it even there." Grandmother Mole, who lives in the breast of Mother Earth, and who has no physical eyes but sees with spiritual eyes, said, "Put it inside of them." And the Creator said, "It is done."
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[27 Nov 2006|10:11pm]
[ mood | uncomfortable ]

woooooow. where to start, where to start. well, it feels really awkward being home. i know thinking you "belong in san francisco" is pretty cliche, but fuck it. the minute we got off the freeway today, felicia and i could only notice how nice huntington beach is. it's so neat and clean, i hate it. i want grungy, dirty buildings with crazy people roaming the streets. i even loved the people who yelled crude things at me. at least they had character. everything is so alive there. i hope i start to not hate my home so much soon. i love the streets and the food and the weather and the buses and street cars.we walked so much and i was so amazed by the guy playing the drums with buckets and trashcans singing "ricearoni..the san francisco treat!" he was soooo talented and just plain fuckin cool. i felt more fulfilled in those three days than i ever have here. it's just sooooooooo damn boring. and to me, lifeless. but not san francisco. never san francisco.

one of these days..oooonnnneeee of these motherfucking days we'll be there for good. if that's what is supposed to happen, of course.

i feel so weird.

maybe pictures some other time.

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[08 Nov 2006|06:47pm]
[ mood | happy because i have control ]

i smoked weed and nobody died.
i didnt get into a car accident.
i didnt o.d. on heroin the next day.
we sat on petes couch for 11 hours.
now whats gonna happen on petes couch?

..nothing, just get laid

our sister, sara, makes SUCH good food. right now shes cookin up a mad version of a chicken taco. jessicas lame. im lame. im crazy.

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[29 Jun 2006|11:06pm]
in the jungle the mighty jungle the lion sleeps tonight
iiiin the jungle the miiighty jungle the lion sleeps toniiiight
ahweemowit ahweemowit ooooeeeeeoooooooooooooohhhhhhhhh babfdsakbfjsda
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word of advice: [25 May 2006|03:01pm]
you look straight up stupid and immature when you post shit all over myspace and livejournal about how lame you think other people are because of the music they listen to or the clothes they wear.

why is so fucking cool to be mean to people now? honestly, some opinions should just never be expressed aloud.
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[13 Feb 2006|04:19am]
i would change myself if i could
i'd walk with my people if i could find them
and i'd say that i'm sorry to you, i'm sorry to you
and i don't wanna call you, but then i wanna call you
cause i don't wanna crush you, but I feel like crushing you
and it's true, i took for granted you were with me
i breathe by your looks and you look right through me
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[08 Feb 2006|02:09pm]
do not befriend potheads with social anxiety
they're boring..
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[07 Feb 2006|03:48pm]
happy birthday maribeth best friend keane.
i love you.
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hahaha maribeth look.... [01 Feb 2006|01:06am]
felicia and i had some more fun on taquitos.com......

Larry: "can you please tell whoever makes the Munchies Mix to take the fuking pretzels out? it fuks shit up, man."

Sandra: "i agree. fuk pretzels. if i wanted pretzels, i would buy a bag of pretzels. plus it fuks up the whole idea of the mix being 'cheesy.' pretzels arent fuking cheesy man.


Larry: "yo girl, you smoke huh?"

Sandra: "ya larry i smoke, joo wanna kick it sometime and blaze dem greenz?"

Larry: "ya call me 420 6969
lets get our freak on gurl"

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[30 Jan 2006|11:30pm]
except a few
but barely even a few
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[11 Dec 2005|04:51pm]
chronicles of narnia is the best movie i have ever seen
im so excited for king kong oh my godddddddd
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[02 Dec 2005|11:32pm]
1/1 times that maribeth and i are stuck at her house waiting for her mom to get back with her car, we go through my friends page and talk shit on everyone.

immature, i know. we aren't sweatin' it.

and then we get really stoned.
i love marihess. tons.
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[13 Nov 2005|11:22am]
bahahaha palm springs was funny. lots of pot until we left with heather, then there was barely any so she scraped resin in the back like a trooper.

i went on this tram with sarah 8000 feet in the air. scaaary shit. then went hiking? haha yeah we went hiking.

now its two weeks until thanksgiving at sarahs and then hawaii.

oh and i kind want a bird now...hmm

p.s. i miss maribeth. and last night me and steph drove to LA with jeff and some girl for a show but instead me and steph just ate subway and then we went home haha.
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[10 Nov 2005|01:42pm]
life has been really good lately. ive been really happpy.

and im excited to go to the zoo with steph soon
and palm springs with sarah in 30 minutes
and hawaii in two weeks
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[31 Oct 2005|04:08pm]
tonight should be pretty fucking bombbbb yeeeeeeeeeeeeah

[29 Oct 2005|07:38pm]
fucking weird but i cant stop thinking about him, i even had a dream about him the other night..

i just wanna have a good time, folks
but walking pneumonia is holding me down
and i miss steph and maribeth
booooo =[

oh and im gonna take lil nigga's advice.."just think about yourself"
in a really unselfish way, of course
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[09 Oct 2005|07:28pm]
Things I need to buy:

Snake/Snake stuuuuufffff
a fucking aquarium, thatd be dope
josh martinez
shit for my room
other cd's
and other clothes

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[05 Oct 2005|12:57am]
He's my ralphie<3
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[02 Oct 2005|03:16pm]
wow, everything alllllllllways gets better..

thats all bullshit, but whatever, i guess theres a reason people always think im a bad friend. whatever, peace.
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[30 Sep 2005|02:48pm]

[27 Sep 2005|01:01am]
If you read this,
even if we do not speak often,
comment with one memory of me.
It can be anything you want,
good or bad.
Just as long as it happened.
Then post this on your livejournal.
See what other people remember about you...
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[26 Sep 2005|03:35pm]
I like having shit to do. School is good, work is good. I didn't go to school today cause I felt reeeeeally sick, but whatever.

anyway, fucking maribeth bestfriend bizzle is coming down this weekend and well, that makes for a greeeeeat weekend. i miss stephanie. and i miss sarah. but most of all, i miss maribeth so im soooo happy i get to see her. this weekends gonna r00l.

lifes pretty chill lately....

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[25 Sep 2005|03:53pm]
i think i pretty much just want to spend all of my days sleeping, working, and going to school...

im taking independence to the extreme.
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[23 Sep 2005|06:01pm]
fuck this shit. juuuuuuuuuust fuck it.
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[20 Sep 2005|12:45am]
Santa Barbara: October 14-16

hell fucking fuck fuck fuck yeah fucking yeah wooo fuck yeah.....yeah..

im excited, cant you tell.
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[06 Sep 2005|01:35am]
Click here.
Take the quiz.
Post your results.
See tipyourhooker__'s results.Collapse )
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[21 Jul 2005|05:27pm]
i added some more of you on my new journal (kaangaroo)
go ahead and add me back if youd like

[09 Jun 2005|07:24pm]
everybody add my new livejournal; kaangaroo

if you don't add me, i won't add you
and you don't have to, but it'd be really appreciated if you commented on that journal to let me know if you added me
that's peace.
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[08 Jan 2005|02:59pm]
Leave an anonymous comment with:

A secret.
A compliment.
A non-compliment.
A song that reminds you of me.
How long we've known each other.
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[30 Nov 2004|11:16pm]
new screen name; the safehouses

i love history and black folk, hence the origin of my new screen name.

add it and IM me RIGHT NOW.

thanks alot.
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[30 Nov 2004|12:30am]

today i craved chicken all day. so i ate some. yum.

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[18 Nov 2004|03:00pm]
dear zac,

this has gotten out of hand. if you wish for the drama to stop, delete your livejournal post, never write about us again, and keep our names out of you and your friends mouths.

i appreciate it,

ps; it's disappointing that we all had to act like this. not only disappointing, but pointless.
i'll see you around kid.

[08 Nov 2004|10:25am]
sometimes bad things have to happen,
in order to make a change for the better.
no one is being realistic at all.
i'm pretty disappointed in general.
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[29 Jun 2004|07:59pm]

It's forrealz this time & unless you comment to be added [and I add you], or you comment to be kept [and I keep you], you will no longer have the priveledge of reading about my life.
p.s. tell me a joke or something to make this fun for me to read please & thank youuuu.
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