(no subject)

so i woke up from a dream in the middle of the night with an arm around me... and in my mostly asleep daze i thought my dream had come true, and then of course i rolled over and it wasn't her. and i ended up crying and i couldn't stop. at least i didn't wake anyone up.

stole from crystal.

Last person who...
.x. Slept in your bed- me.
.x. Saw you cry- carrie.
.x. You shared a drink with?- andy.
.x. You went to the movies with?- kani and scott.
.x. You went to the mall with- angel.
.x. Yelled at you?- prof. bellon.
.x. Sent you an email- kyle.

Have Your Ever...
.x. Said "I love you"- yes.
.x. Been to New York- yes.
.x. Been to Florida?- yes.
.x. California- no.
.x. Mexico- no.
.x. China- ew. no.
.x. Canada- no.
.x. Danced naked- yes.
.x. Dreamed something really crazy and then it happens the next day- yes. lmfao. ((andy breaking into my house and waking me up by playing my guitar loud as hell))
.x. Stalked someone- yes.

Pick One...
.x. Apples or bananas- apples.
.x. Red or blue- red.
.x. Walmart or Kmart- wal*mart.
.x. Math or English- math.
.x. radio or CD- cd.
.x. drawing or painting- drawing.
.x. High school or college- college.

The Last Few Questions...
.x. Last time you went out of the state- when i went to see kyle.
.x. Weirdest thing about you- nothing.
.x. What book are you reading now- none.
.x. What's on your mouse pad- quantel.
.x. Favorite magazine- don't care.
.x. Favorite sound- moans.
.x. Worst feeling in the world- being unloved.
.x. What is the first thing you think when you wake in the morning- i'm not telling you that.
.x. Do you like scary or exciting rollercoasters- yes?
.x. How many rings before you answer- 3.
.x. Chocolate or vanilla- vanilla.
.x. If you could have any job you wanted- something with kids.
.x. What was the last food you ate- strawberries.
.x. you bored- of course.
.x. How many buddies are on- 21, and almost all of them are away.
five things you did today.
[x]took a shower.
[x]went to my classes.
[x]took a quiz.
[x]took a final.
[x]ate with christina.

five things that everyone should know about you.
[x]i'm too emotional.
[x]i'm impossible to love.
[x]i'm annoying.
[x]you probably won't like me.
[x]i can probably make you laugh.

five groups/artists you listened to yesterday.
[x]across five aprils.
[x]taking back sunday.
[x]something corporate.

five things that make you happy.

three things that disgust you.
[x]selfish people.

five things you can't live without.
[x]a head.

five things you'll do when you complete this.
[x]play a game.
[x]do something with kani.
[x]watch american idol.
[x]drink something.

that's cool. do that if you're cool.
Name: jade.
Birthdate: march 13.
Birthplace: columbus, ga.
Current location: stone mountain, ga.
Eyes: blue.
Hair: brown.
Height: 5'7.
Righty or Lefty: right.
Zodiac Sign: pisces.

Your heritage: funny.
Your weakness: i'm sure you know.
Your shoes you wore today: gbx.
Your fears: being alone.
Your perfect pizza: pepperoni and bell peppers.
Goal you'd like to achieve: be happy.

Your thoughts first waking up: i already told you it's too personal.
Your best physical feature: my hands.
Your bedtime: .
Your most missed memory: ok.

Pepsi or Coke: coke
McDonald's or Burger King: mcdonalds.
Single or group dates: neither.
Adidas or Nike: adidas.
Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: eh.
Chocolate or vanilla: vanilla.
Cappuccino or coffee: chai frappuccino. mmmmm.

Smoke: not cigarettes.
Cuss: yes.
Have a crush: ha.
Want to go college: i am.
Want to get married: eh.
Believe in yourself: no.
Get motion sickness: no.
Think you're attractive: no.
Think you're a health freak: no.
Get along with your parents: when i'm their puppet.
Like thunderstorms: yes.
Play an instrument: guitar.

Layer.six - in the past months
Gone to the mall: yes.
Eaten an entire box of Oreos: no.
Eaten sushi: no.
Been on stage: yes.
Gone skating: yes.
Made homemade cookies: yes.
Stolen anything: no.

Layer.seven - ever..
Been trashed or extremely intoxicated: yes.
Been called a tease: no.
Got beaten up: no.

Age you hope to be married: eh.
Number and name of children:
Dream wedding: shut up.
How do you want to die: painlessly.
Where do you want to attend college: .
Dream job: answered this.
Country you want to visit: canada.

Layer.nine - In a guy/girl...
Best eye color: don't care.
Best hair color: don't care.
Short or long hair: don't care.
Height: shorterdon't care.
Best clothing: don't care.
Best first date location: jennifer nettles show.
Best first kiss location: kyle's house.

Number of drugs taken illegally: couldn't tell you.
Number of people I could trust with my life: 1... maybe 3.
Number of CDs that I own: too many to count.
Number of piercings: 0.
Number of tattoos: 0.
Number of times my name's been in the news: a couple.
Number of scars on my body: don't know.
Number of things in my past that I regret: i don't know.

para non friends.

i want everyone who reads this to ask me 3 questions, no more, no less.
ask me anything you want.
then i want you to go to your journal, copy and paste this allowing your friends to ask you anything.

stole from andi.

(no subject)

complete and total adoration,
my gift to you, my heart was yours,
in ten weeks you shaped it,
in one night you murdered it.
torn from my chest and laid at your feet,
that first step that you took was the worst.
since then you've walked a thousand miles in solace and short remark,
and i still have these memories,
but will never see what we could have been.
remember when we talked about where we'd be a year from now?
remember when you held my hand like you'd never let it go?
remember, cause that's all you can do.
we'll never make another memory,
we'll never make another memory.
i wish i would have died in your arms the last time we were together,
so i wouldn't have to wake without you today.

this time i thought things were real,
you said they were,
what happened?
you were a priority,
was i an option?

i let you see a side of me that i don't share with anyone.
promises are just words unless they are fulfilled.
knew from the beginning all i had to offer you was my heart,
i'm just sorry that it wasn't enough.

so, we'll go our own ways,
and hopefully you'll remember these things i've told you,
hopefully you'll understand that everything i said is in sincerity.
a broken heart is not what i wanted from this,
but i guess i've learned from it.
but aren't you supposed to learn from your mistakes?
i don't consider this a mistake,
i just wish the story didn't end this way,
cause i'm still in love with the person who helped me write it.

remember when we talked about where we'd be a year from now?
remember when you held my hand like you'd never let it go?