wistful, hopeless romantic, daydreaming, nostalgic

Backdated to 10, March 1998

I can't believe another school year is over . . . So many things have happened this year, too . . .

The Carnival was a success! I'm so glad my grandmum was able to get us the carousel--I hadn't been on one in ages and I think everyone else enjoyed it as well. Oh, and I saw unicorns! I went on Hagrid's tour of the Forbidden Forest and we came across a family of them on our way out. They were beautiful--so pure white they were shining . . . I've never seen anything like them. And there was a baby one, too--it was pure gold, actually. They were simply amazing . . .

I'm almost done packing now--I just need to get the rest of my books together. It seems so strange to be going home--it seems we just came back . . . I can't believe I'm going to be in my final year at Hogwarts this autumn--I'd best not get ahead of myself though. I'm going to need to do quite a bit of research over holidays--try to figure out what I want to do after Hogwarts and such.

Good luck to the seventh years--or should I say Hogwarts Class of 1998? I hope you do well in whatever path life takes you on.

This has been such an interesting year--I wonder what next year will bring?

~Lily



((OOC: Thanks everyone on m_l for making my first RP experience an awesome one--I think I've gotten the hang of it now and I'm looking forward to m_w ::smiles::))

  • Current Music
    the sounds of packing
studious, stressed, working, nervous, focused

(no subject)

One week of exams over, one left to go . . . .

I'm quite sure I did well on Muggle Studies and Transfiguration. The Jane Austen unit in Muggle Studies worked quite well to my advantage--she's always been one of my favourites . . . and I was quite surprised how much easier Transfiguration was than I thought it would be. However, I think it's because Professor Dee didn't teach us as much and certainly didn't go into as much detail as Headmistress McGonagall did when she taught us. Arithmancy was fairly tricky, but I do think I filled in the majority of the number chart properly. Astronomy . . . I love constellations and the night sky, but I don't much care if Io is Jupiter's largest moon (although I love how all its moons have been given mythological names!) or the angles of Saturn's rings during solar eclipses. I know that's horrible, too . . . . I do hope I did a decent job, though.

I'm quite looking forward to the Carnival! It'll be rather welcome after exams and everything else that's happened this year.

I'd best get back to studying and revising . . .

~Lily

  • Current Music
    "The Point of No Return" ~Phantom of the Opera OLC
smiling, excited, happy

(backdated to let's say Saturday)

I'm still so overwhelmed . . . one minute we were waiting and praying . . . and then I saw Stacey's journal message saying the clouds had disappeared in Nottingham. I ran to look out the window and they *were* gone! I've always thought the night sky beautiful, but stars have never seemed lovelier than they did that moment. And then Daddy my dad came home a few hours later--I was so glad to see him. He was limping and a little bit bruised from a curse that hit him, but otherwise he's fine.

And the owl from Headmistress McGonagall! I was so happy they opened Hogwarts again . . . I know it seems a bit strange, but I'm quite looking forward to exams--I guess it's because it's something that's so *normal* . . . after everything that's happened.


Thank you to everyone who fought . . . I'm so grateful.

~Lily/Michelle

  • Current Music
    "Angels" ~Robbie Williams
peeved, depressed, sad, hurt/upset/scared

Warded against DEs and DE supporters

I’m home. It feels so strange to be here, but I’m glad I’m with my parents right now. As I was telling Stacey earlier, King's Cross was right depressing, with everyone coming to get their children . . . my mum couldn't stop crying when she and my dad picked me up . . . . this is going to be so hard on her, especially losing my dad--I really don’t know what she’s going to do. The three of us have pretty much been spending every waking moment together, and Grandma Christine all but moved in this morning. We’ve just been spending time in each other’s company, loving, crying, remembering happier times . . . There was a large peace gathering of wizards at the Tor yesterday, which we went to. It was quite moving—the whole hill was covered and we all held candles. It feels so strange . . . not knowing exactly when things are going to start happening, not knowing *how* they’re going to happen . . . but having the fear of what’s about to come . . . I want to make the most of this time. Wait a trice—Dad’s calling me out to the sitting room . . . and he sounds worried . . .

((OOC: more under the cut--I didn't realise this was so long))Collapse )

  • Current Music
    "The Last Rose of Summer" ~Sarah Brightman
content, default, thoughtful/thinking, pensive

Warded against DEs and DE supporters

"Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgment that something else is more important than fear." ~Ambrose Redmoon

I was looking through the book of quotations my parents gave me last Christmas and found the above quote--it's strangely fitting for what's going on . . .

I think Hermione's right--if we give up, then he's already won though I don't know how anyone will be able to stop him . . . we have to keep some hope--but it's so hard. Mum and Dad sent me an owl asking when I wanted to come home--I . . . I want to be with them . . . to be with them one last time--and Grandma Christine . . . but then I want to be here, too . . . at least for a little bit longer. Merlin, I never thought I'd have to make a decision like this.

And I . . . I don't want anyone to take this the wrong way, but I feel just as bad for those who are going to survive this--because they'll be losing both friends and family. I don't know what Mum's going to do without Dad . . . Amor Vincit Omnia--I've always believed in the power of love, but . . . I don't know I don't think that will be enough now.

And I wish I didn't have so many regrets. I wish I'd taken more opportunities, engaged in more House activities instead of retreating to my room ; gotten to know more of my classmates, both in and outside my House ; lived more. I wish I'd have been a better person , I wish I'd have fallen in love , I wish . . . I wish . . . I wish this wasn't happening!

I shouldn't be so selfish . . . if anyone wants to talk , I'll be in the Common Room. I just hope I can help . . .


And I promise to write before I go home . . . I want you to know that I care about you and thank you for being there and . . . I want to say good-bye, when the time comes.

~Lily

  • Current Mood
    scared scared but trying to be strong
content, default, thoughtful/thinking, pensive

*Heavily* warded against DEs, DE supporters, &c

Merlin . I don't . . . I don't know what to say . . . I can't stop shaking . . .

[Private]
What's going to happen to all of us?? How can someone be so evil?? I don't want to die--I don't want *us* to die . . . Is there anything we can do? Is there anyway to stop this? How can we do anything without Dumbledore?
Merlin, I'm so scared.
[/Private]

~Lily

  • Current Mood
    scared so very terrified
studious, stressed, working, nervous, focused

(no subject)

And I'm quite glad I talked myself out of writing in for advice--what was I thinking?

Things seem to be going along rather well for the Charity Carnival--and it's a good way to keep my mind off of certain things . . . as well as provide me with breaks from studying and revising and such. I spent almost the whole evening in the library again last night--well into the evening, actually--and I think I may have forgotten to eat dinner again. I should probably ask Ginny if she'd drag me out of the Common Room once in awhile.

Stacey, I've written my grandmum about whether she can secure a carousel for us. She knows someone in the toy business or something, so she's going to ask him about it and write me back with his answer. And she's sent me a few recipes as well--the lemon squares and a few other sweets.

~Lily



((OOC: For those of you who have already made journals on magic_war like I have [yay massive icon-ness!], I've kept the same journal name *smiles*))

  • Current Music
    "Song to the Moon" ~Dvorák (OOC: Sarah Brightman's version)
wistful, hopeless romantic, daydreaming, nostalgic

Warded against DEs and DE supporters

Well, I suppose being in DA fourth year and now has started to pay off--I've finally managed my Patronus. It's an eagle--specifically a golden eagle. I looked it up in Magical and Nonmagical Birds of the United Kingdom after dinner. It's rather pretty, actually . . . though when I first saw my psuedo-Patronus had wings a few weeks ago, I was hoping it would be a swan. I suppose an eagle would make a better Patronus, but I don't see how it fits with me--I mean, I've always thought eagles to symbolise bravery and courage . . . and I certainly don't consider myself brave--sometimes I wonder why I'm in Gryffindor anyway . . . Although the eagle is also the mascot for Ravenclaw--I was almost Sorted there, but the Hat must have had some reason for putting me where I am . . . I remember it said something along the lines of "Courage is seen in many forms". I still don't think I'm brave, though . . . I wonder what my Animagus form will be, if I ever make it that far? I know the animal chooses the wizard (or witch), like a wand, but I think I might like to be a bird . . .

I should be happier about this, but I don't know--for some reason I can't be . . . I guess with everything going on . . . I don't know. I don't know how much longer I can deal with all of this . . . Why do these things have to happen?? I don't know how to handle this and I'm so scared--what's going to happen now?

I wish it would all go away . . .

~Lily

  • Current Music
    "Dust in the Wind" ~Kansas
peeved, depressed, sad, hurt/upset/scared

Very carefully warded against DEs and DE supporters

I've just read the Prophet . . . . I don't know what to say . . . Merlin, this is more horrible than I thought . . . I feel like crying, but I'm too shocked to . . .

Merlin .

What is this world coming to? What are we supposed to *do*?

~Lily

[Private to Marietta Edgecombe]
Please tell me Louisa's alright.
[/end private]

  • Current Music
    "Your Song" ~Elton John