"because he will fucking smash you, you fucking goof!"


friday night was rian's birthday at the fox and fiddle and of course i had a few beers. i wasn't smashed, but i was nice and buzzed.
just as i was getting on the train (because i apparently had reception in the station) barbara called me and asked if i wanted go smoke with her.
so i meet up with her and she had been asking me all week to go to a club on saturday. i felt bad saying no, but i just really didn't want to go to one. i hate clubs. i'd rather go to a bar. plus it was caribana weekend, so there would even MORE crowds and it would be all music that i didn't wanna hear.

but that didn't matter because i was nice and buzzed and a song i actually recognized was on the radio so i finally caved in and said yes. ugh.

i woke up on saturday morning and realized that i said yes, and immediately tried to think of ways to tell her i wasn't going. she guilt tripped me and i told her that i did have plans with chrystina but it was just for dinner so i would meet up with her after. plans with chrystina fell through, but june asked if i wanted to go to flatiron.

just before i left to meet up with june, i checked the tonic website to see if they were having some sort of special event going on 'cuz of the weekend. plus, i wanted to see how much cover was. it said cover was $15 or $5 on guestlist before 11:30. so i called her to make sure she had guestlist because i was NOT paying $15 to get into a club that i didn't want to go to. she did, so it was cool.

so i go to flatiron and after a few drinks i did NOT want to leave. seriously. i was having fun. especially staring at the c.bale lookalike. lol. but i had to leave. well, i kind of lost track of time and ended up being late. i got to osgoode station AT 11:30, so we missed guestlist. i knew it was my fault and we were going to have to pay $15 to get in. so i was just gonna bite it and pay it and buy the first couple rounds. well, we get to the club and we're told that cover is $30. WHAT?

we're in line for just under 10 minutes and they changed it to $40!
i'm sorry. fuck that shit.
you're a $5 club and you're trying to charge me $40?
don't think so.
and if we had got there for guestlist, it would have been $15.
which is how much i said wouldn't pay in the first place.

when we were walking by republik (looking for any other club) a bouncer was like "don't piss me off tonight. not tonight of all nights!" and some smart ass goes "why?" and a cop was standing on the opposite side of the guy and yells "because he will fucking smash you. you fucking goof!"

it was kind of amazing.

so we kept walking and i was like "y'know what, if we go to a bar i'll buy a couple pitchers".
but she wanted to dance and i wasn't paying $30 (the cheapest any club was charging) just to dance, so i started walking to the subway. i mean, i could barely walk in the first place because my shoes were killing me.

good idea - hot red heels
bad idea - doing a lot of walking before you've had a chance to actually break them in.

so i called andrea 'cuz i figured she would be out and about somewhere. she picked me up from queen's park station and we went to college street bar for a few quick drinks.

genevieve and i were downstairs in the bathroom and as i was washing my hands this girl was like "FUUUUUUUCK! FUCKING HICCUPS!" and i said "hold your breath and swallow" and when i turned around it was diane from mtv. lol. she was trashed. and she kept banging on the stall doors yelling "HICCUPS!!!" hahahaha.

so we left there and went to doane's for a little bit. i finally got home around 5am. i walked in and my mom was like "good morning". lol.

good times.

mandarin tonight!

don't ask a psychic about history.


i'm going to see a psychic next week.
we're making appointments for her to come here to do readings.
apparently, they do this about once a year.

it sounds neat.
she actually records the session and gives it to you at the end so that you can listen to it later and see what happened - if anything came true.

it'll be interesting to see what she has to say about a few things.

i'll listen when they tell me "if he burns you, let him go"





i don't wanna wonder
whether you love me
i don't wanna wonder
whether you care
so don't try to woo me
don't try to fool me

i know all your tricks
it's a possibility
you'll sit in my corner




this is what scarlett johansen wishes she sounded like.
i love zooey.
this song is amazing and her voice is just gorgeous.
i'm in love with she and him.

they are playing next week at the opera house.
july 23rd.
$23.50.

someone come with me, please. :)

random thoughts on a random subject.


i've lived in my condo for a year now.
i've only ever been in the building's elevator once.

and that was because i was drunk and realized that i had never been in the building's elevator.
i live on the first floor and i don't know anybody on the other floors, so there's never any reason for me to be on the elevator or go to the other floors.

on my way down the hall to my unit is when it hit me.
so i decided that it was time.
i walked back down the hall from the direction i had just come and got on the elevator.
it was just like any other elevator. nothing special.
i got upstairs to the fourth floor.

and then i got an even better idea.
i walked down the hall (on the side that my unit was on down on the first floor) stomping my feet the whole way. i have a pretty heavy foot as it is, but i walked as heavy as i could.
and then i got to the stairs.
the stairs are hollow and the walls are concrete.
so you can hear each step and then it echoes off the wall.
so i stomped down those, too.

but when i got downstairs to the first floor, i walked quietly.
that's my floor.

and then i went to the unit with the fire alarm near the ceiling just to the right of the top of the door frame.
i know that one is mine. it's my marker to know where i'm going when i'm drunk so that i don't have to look for unit numbers.

when we first moved in, i was afraid i'd be drunk and out of habit give a cab driver my old address. well, i gave the first cab driver the right address, but went to the wrong door when i got inside.
i didn't go far enough down the hall.

the second time, i managed to give the driver the right address again. when i got inside, i remembered that i hadn't gone far enough down the hall... so i kept going. i went too far that time.

now i know.
now i know to look for the fire alarm.

those are the rules. ya gotta follow the rules.


rule #1 - be a creature unlike any other

i'm awesome. i know i am.
i own the room.
i am the room.

you want me and i know you want me.
and yet...

i'll ignore you.
until you need me.
you don't just want me.
you need me.

i don't need you.
i don't even want you.

or maybe...
i want you to want me more.

i'm not gonna make this easy.
i'm not giving this one to you.
earn it.


earn me.

and that is the essence of the rules.

the game - you just lostCollapse )

i'm a wild horse that can't be broken!