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Silly Rules

It's a new year. Happy New Year, people.
I don't do resolutions -- the marquis made me give them up a while back as I am too good at frighteningly punitive ones. But, having said that, and with his permission, I have made one for this year.
I'm giving up paying attention to silly rules acquired from other people.
What, you may ask? Let me explain.
I have a silly rule. It goes like this: 'If I ruled the world, nobody over the age of 10 would be allowed to appear in public wearing shorts (short pants, for the USians) unless they are exercising/playing sport/on the way to or from doing same.' I don't like shorts, I find them aesthetically ugly. I don't wear them. My characters don't wear them. In my world, nobody would wear them, except as outlined above.
I occasionally express this thought, and other people laugh at me or express disagreement. As far as I know, no-one has every felt that they should obey this rule just because I expressed it. (If there is anyone out there who avoids wearing shorts at me, however, then thank you! It's not necessary, but it is appreciated.) I don't expect other people to obey it, I have to say (even if I wish they would. But that's my problem).
Everyone has silly rules, things they don't like or wish others wouldn't do. Most people ignore these.
I don't. I am far too prone to taking stray remarks as absolutes that *must* be obeyed lest I cause terrible offence. Even if the person is not there and has probably forgotten what they said. And if I do find myself breaking one of these silly rules, I feel horribly guilty, I stop enjoying whatever it is, I feel I am a bad person.
This, frankly, is daft. I'm not talking rules around courtesy or consideration. I'm talking the 'Kari hates shorts' kind of rule. I waste time and energy fretting and feeling I should make amends even if the person in question is miles away and will never know that I read X type of book/dyed my hair X colour/wore X item.
So, as of this year, I'm resolved to stop doing this. Yes, desperance, this means I may occasionally wear blue in your presence. I know you hate blue. You know I like blue (and I know you don't mind if I wear it, because you're a grown up and you don't expect me to adopt your rules, and you think it's daft that I do). It means I will read certain subgenres without fretting (even if Y thinks it's a waste of time), enjoy cloudy weather, talk to friendly dogs, and generally let myself have my own reactions to minor things rather than feeling obliged to be a walk-on in my own head.
So there.
I also need to do some work around more serious rules, like the one that tells me that if someone else expresses a need, I must prioritise that over everything else in my life, even if to do so causes me direct damage. But that's a lot harder.... I'll keep you posted.
Meanwhile, anyone want to share their silly rules? I promise to flout them.

Comments

( 71 comments — Leave a comment )
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deborah_c
Jan. 5th, 2011 12:22 pm (UTC)
the marquis made me give them up
I'm giving up paying attention to silly rules acquired from other people.

... am I alone in wondering how these two statements interact? ;-)
la_marquise_de_
Jan. 5th, 2011 01:00 pm (UTC)
Well, he'd say that none of his rules are silly. And, more to the point, my resolutions have tended to be very severe and very severely enforced on myself, in ways which are damaging. But I felt obliged to make them, because I have a duty to be Perfect As Defined By Others.
klwilliams
Jan. 5th, 2011 12:26 pm (UTC)
Good for you. This is very healthy. I will also try not to need anything around you. :-)
la_marquise_de_
Jan. 5th, 2011 01:01 pm (UTC)
No, no. You may need. This is my stuff. I am always happy to be asked, I just should try harder not to say 'yes' at any cost. (The almost rescue on mas Eve was *nowhere* near the bad end. It was no problem.)
lil_shepherd
Jan. 5th, 2011 12:32 pm (UTC)
I think it is great that you want to give up silly rules and will do all in my power to help you. (Incidentally, I do wear shorts in summer despite being overweight because they are cool and comfortable. I am too old to worry about how I look.)

I'm not sure I have any silly rules that I want other people to obey, though. Though I can be quite rude, of course. *sigh*
la_marquise_de_
Jan. 5th, 2011 01:02 pm (UTC)
I will pretend not to know about your shorts!
(no subject) - sartorias - Jan. 5th, 2011 01:40 pm (UTC) - Expand
desperance
Jan. 5th, 2011 12:34 pm (UTC)
Yes, [info]desperance, this means I may occasionally wear blue in your presence.

That'll be fine. It always has been fine. Though I shall continue not to wear shorts in your presence, and thus acquire merit (merit beyond deserving, naturally: for as it happens I own no shorts, but still...).

stevegreen
Jan. 5th, 2011 12:44 pm (UTC)
I did: Ann forced me to buy a pair for an Hawaiian-themed bbq. Worn once, never again, especially not after my left leg went to hell and only came halfway back.
(no subject) - klwilliams - Jan. 5th, 2011 12:55 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - la_marquise_de_ - Jan. 5th, 2011 01:03 pm (UTC) - Expand
tamaranth
Jan. 5th, 2011 12:39 pm (UTC)
Herewith please find enclosed a Certificate exempting you from any and all silly rules that I may or may not have propounded in the past.

Here, by the way, is the most public and generalised of my New Year's Thoughts:
fit your own lifemask first before helping others


Hang on. desperance hates blue. Horus hates blue. ARE THEY BY ANY CHANCE RELATED?

Silly rule for you to flout:
Turn widdershins three times before entering a room in which two or more cats are present.

desperance
Jan. 5th, 2011 12:43 pm (UTC)
We are soul-kin, Horus and I.
(no subject) - la_marquise_de_ - Jan. 5th, 2011 01:07 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - tamaranth - Jan. 5th, 2011 01:43 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - la_marquise_de_ - Jan. 5th, 2011 01:04 pm (UTC) - Expand
(Anonymous)
Jan. 5th, 2011 12:41 pm (UTC)
I acquired a new silly rule yesterday: Thou shalt not wear see-through swimwear. The man ploughing up and down the pool appeared very disconcertingly naked and it was weird.

However, may I offer hearty support for your resolution at all times.
la_marquise_de_
Jan. 5th, 2011 01:04 pm (UTC)
I share your concern over that one. One can only hope he didn't know.
sleigh
Jan. 5th, 2011 12:42 pm (UTC)
Sounds like a fantastic resolution to me!
la_marquise_de_
Jan. 5th, 2011 01:04 pm (UTC)
Thank you!
chickenfeet2003
Jan. 5th, 2011 12:44 pm (UTC)
I believe it is wrong to wear socks with sandals. Such footwear at the opera is right out.
bellinghman
Jan. 5th, 2011 01:04 pm (UTC)
*bbllllrrrppp*
(no subject) - la_marquise_de_ - Jan. 5th, 2011 01:05 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - chickenfeet2003 - Jan. 5th, 2011 01:10 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - sartorias - Jan. 5th, 2011 01:41 pm (UTC) - Expand
mizkit
Jan. 5th, 2011 01:16 pm (UTC)
My wardrobe must be an ongoing source of dismay to desperance, as blue is my very favorite color. :)

I am sure I have silly rules, but I can't think of any of them right now! I'll let you know when I remember. :)
la_marquise_de_
Jan. 5th, 2011 04:42 pm (UTC)
Blue is my favourite colour too. If Chaz ever gets seriously evil, we can both wear blue at him at once.
(Deleted comment)
la_marquise_de_
Jan. 5th, 2011 04:43 pm (UTC)
It's always good to meet someone else who understands about shorts!
queenoftheskies
Jan. 5th, 2011 01:28 pm (UTC)
Good for you!

My biggest problem with rules is that I get it in my head that I must follow everyone's writing rules, that EVERYONE must know more than me. That makes for an unhappy writer me sometimes.
la_marquise_de_
Jan. 5th, 2011 04:43 pm (UTC)
I get that, too. I have a small toy shark over my desk whose job is to chase those rules away and bite them.
sartorias
Jan. 5th, 2011 01:39 pm (UTC)
If I ruled the world, no one would be allowed to chew gum in public.

Anyone eating crunchy food from crackling bags during a movie that I paid 12 bucks to get into would be ejected forthwith.

Phone scam sales persons? Automatically given a new job: breaking down landfill into biodegradable bits.

Politicians would be forcibly removed from their wealth.

That's starters.
la_marquise_de_
Jan. 5th, 2011 04:44 pm (UTC)
I particularly like no. 4
ms_cataclysm
Jan. 5th, 2011 01:40 pm (UTC)
For professional reasons, I attempt to believe six impossible things and maintain my disbelief for at least one minute per belief before breakfast on working days.

Please flout away at the time of your choice .
la_marquise_de_
Jan. 5th, 2011 04:44 pm (UTC)
That isn't silly at all.
(Deleted comment)
la_marquise_de_
Jan. 5th, 2011 04:45 pm (UTC)
Here they call them 'city shorts'. And yes, they're awful.
(no subject) - anef - Jan. 7th, 2011 07:11 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - la_marquise_de_ - Jan. 7th, 2011 11:21 am (UTC) - Expand
rysmiel
Jan. 5th, 2011 02:35 pm (UTC)
I have odd OCDish rules about going out and doing a bunch of errands; it makes me uncomfortable to retrace my steps while doing so, and somewhat uncomfortable to not start with the farthest from home and work homewards. I also like to eat nice complicated meals with bits of different foodstuffs alternating, and to read series fiction interspersed with other things. Do feel free to flout these.

I also have a notion that any planet where people have to wear clothes because of environmental conditions is insufficiently terraformed, but I am not seeing how constructively to flout this even were you so inclined, given how many other social constructs there are expecting people to be clothed, and the general lack of handily available terraforming technology to individuals.
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