February 10th, 2011

Moon cat

Mooncat's Excellent Week (so far)

Finally, life as it should be. I don't know why it's taken so long to get this sorted out (because, really, it should be normal. But a cat can only do so much to get things across to humans, who, as we know, are very, very dim). However, I can report that so far, this week is doing everything right.

On Saturday, my humans invited a sensible selection of other humans to sit in the sitting room. They also made the boy cats Go Out, so I had all the humans to myself, which is only right and proper. They were well-trained humans. They fussed me. They combed me. They let me push them off their seats so I could sit in the warm place. One of them was knitting! All wool and string is mine! I helped make the knitting much, much better.
On Sunday, my humans made the boy cats Go Out again but then 'had a lie in'. I sat on them lots. There were no boy cats trying to get attention. It was good. Then the humans got up and ate prawns and gave me some. The boy cats didn't get any. Female human was dozy all day. She kept forgetting that she had already brushed me. I got combed four times. It was excellent and I didn't even have to bite her ankles to get it done.
On Monday, female human went out early, which is bad and wrong. But male human got up and then lay on the sitting room floor doing reading instead of rushing about and going out. This was excellent. I washed his beard. And his hair. And his face. And his hands. And his book. I sat on his head. He is mine. His book is mine. I helped him do reading.
On Tuesday, I beat Horus to the gushy food. And to the warm cushion. And to the lap. And to the fuss. Female human went out again all which is bad so I told her off when she came back and she did extra brushing and extra play and there were no boy cats because they were asleep upstairs.
On Wednesday I did helping with the computer. The monitor is my toy. I played with it. I sat on the keyboard to keep it warm which is important. I washed the female human's hands for her because she needs to be kept clean. I lay on her head. The boy cats were out because they are stupid and like to get muddy paws.
This morning I pushed Horus out of the gushy food again. Then I sat on the boiler and did insulating which is good and helpful. And the stupid boy cats went out in the rain.

Mooncat.
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    satisfied smug
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