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I'm an obtuse man, so I'll try to be oblique


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Happy arbitrary temporal milestone
I got drunk at a party tonight and watched people nearly seriously injure themselves detonating small explosives. The smell of gunpowder in the air made me extremely anxious, because all I could think about was being an Army officer in Iraq or Afghanistan. Boy, I've come up with some dumb ideas, but going to Army Officer Candidacy School has got to take the cake, because it could lead to my death...which wouldn't actually bother me much, because I'd be FUCKING DEAD...or getting maimed. I'd really hate to not be able to lift a gun to my own head in that scenario, and I might not be able to if that improvised explosive device were powerful enough!

You know, fuck god and country. And I don't even believe in god!

ANYWAY. This is where I was last year. The first video is actual, the second is idealized. I don't think I want to spend another NYE any other way for the foreseeable future. If I have to make shittier friends in order to make this happen again (because my good ones don't appreciate trance or the culture that comes with it), so be it. It's only once...or three times a year. (That is, EDC, which is at the end of June, and Monster Massive, which is around Halloween.)

Before you watch, a comment on this video: I was bothered by Armin's choice of including footage of Obama speaking. I was standing next to one of my oldest, best friends who happens to be a staunch conservative. And when that came on, I knew that it just wasn't appropriate. You don't talk politics at gatherings like this. And by gatherings like this, I mean everything to parties to massive raves with over 70,000 people. It's divisive.

I mean, words like, "TONIGHT BELONGS TO YOU" make a lot of sense by themselves for a crowd like that, because the state of mind the vast majority of us were in made it okay for the moment. And I know, because my buddy was like, "YEAH, SOMETHINGSOMETHINGSOMETHING, BUT I'M OKAY THAT HE GOT ELECTED." But I know why he said that. He just wasn't all there.

One of the hardest conversations I had in 2008 was talking to him about that election. We've known each other for almost ten years now, but the level of bitterness that that conversation reached at that speed was so shocking that we just haven't spoken about politics since.

Enjoy. I'm somewhere near the stage. See if you can spot me!

Sounds good, man.