Tags: lytdybr

orange

(no subject)

Waiting at the traffic light at a busy intersection this morning I was stopped next to a tractor trailer. It was a see-through truck with walls made of metal bars spaced widely enough to expose the occasional curious pig snout.
ophelia

Recipe for Temporary Happiness

1) begin with a blender or food processor
2) add frozen fruit and milk
3) blend
4) if desired, add sweetener (honey!) and/or cream liqueur of your choice
5) blend some more
6) transfer to tall glass
7) for extra happiness, add a straw
8)  *slurp*

    
pink and yellow

What would you do?

You and your date walk into a restaurant and the hostess seats you at a table in the back of the restaurant.  You notice that the decor has become more sophisticated since your last visit.  They did go a little too far with dimming the lights, though, given how hard it is to read the menu.  Anyways, you look over the menu, check out the list of cocktails, select appetizer and entrees, then continue the discussion you started earlier.  Then you realize that you have been sitting there for more than 10 minutes, but a waiter has not stopped by to offer you drinks (which usually takes an average of 82 seconds or so), not to mention taking your order.    You are seated in the back of the restaurant and away from the aisle, so it's not that easy to just waive a waiter over. What do you do?
  1. Resolve to wait another 6 minutes and then walk out of the restaurant.
  2. Wave the white napkin above your head.
  3. Practice burning holes in said white napkin using the candle on the table.
  4. Use your cell phone to dial the restaurant's number and politely request the attention of a waiter.
  5. Lean over to a neighboring table and ask if you could get a slice of bread because you are starving, then wait for the disgruntled diners to call a waiter to complain to them
  6. Walk over to the hostess and ask if they are hiring wait staff, say that you figured they must be experiencing a serious shortage since you're still waiting for a waiter
Feel free to suggest your idea or guess which of these we actually did a few days ago.
pink and yellow

(no subject)

The highlight of this morning's commute came when, stopped at a traffic light, I was blankly staring at the license plate of the car in front of me and realized that I was behind this very same car yesterday, on the same stretch of road.  Some coincidence! 

Adorning a silver Mercedes, it was easy to spot the rare license plate:

orange

(no subject)

Blackbaud has *the* worst music playing while you are on hold.  No matter how short of a wait they have, having listen to that makes it an eternity.
orange

(no subject)

Фонари вдоль главной улицы нашего городка украшены большими светящимися снежинками.  Проезжая через перекрёсток где улица соединяет два городка видно что в Chapel Hill снежинки другие и больше по размеру чем в Carrboro.  Очень надеюсь что это будут не единственные снежинки которые мы здесь увидим этой зимой.  Прошлой зимой снег шёл всего один раз, он был мокрый и мгновенно таял на асфальте.  Я стояла у окна и с радостью наблюдала, дабы не пропустить столь редкое зрелище.  Не думала что может так не хватать холодной погоды, мороза и снега.  Я конечно не жалуюсь на то что больше не надо уживаться с обледеневшими дорогами покрытыми слякотью,  пронизывающим морозом ветром и горами снега каждую неделю-две.  Просто хочется что-бы к нам хотя бы не надолго заглянула зима.
ophelia

(no subject)

There is now definitive material proof that the trunk of a car filled with useful household items is not a good place to spill a quart of tomato juice.
orange

Fearless user: 1 Excel: 0

I just figured out how to use formulas to split a cell with “John Smith” into two cells with “John” and “Smith.”  While the utility of this special knowledge may escape you, it will definitely make my life easier next time I have to deal with that enormous mailing list of 8,000+ names, most of which have both first and last names in one field.  (Who was the brilliant person who decided to enter them all like this anyway?)  Now I can take the unprecedented step of finally alphabetizing the list according to last names!  As a bonus, I can make letters that say  "Dear John" or I can import all of these names into a database.     Woo-hooo!