September 8th, 2006

When John Wayne Died they removed 50 pounds of stomach plaque from him

so the living arrangements that i had dreamed would land me in that promised land are falling apart. I need to live alone because the poison my body pumps out isnt conducive to having roommates stick around.

I sowed my final wild oat. You always reap what you sow and i am waiting for the cycle to come full circle.

The plans i made never once had you replaced by any face. it was always you.

I got a check from work today for 100 dollars. I guess last pay period they took too much out. That was honest. i complain a lot, i miss tacoma, and i miss my family, But i know that Philadelphia is closer than tacoma, and new york is even closer. I want to burn my trail and the proof of the things i have done. I want GOds warm loving kindness to sculpt and shape my deformed bones and mangled skin.
My silver lined tongue would break free from its metal mold and finally say how much i love you.

The letter i wrote to you is still in the envelope. "one night on drugs i thought of you and cryed my eyes out, thats when i realized what i was doing. what i needed to do. If i wanted any flowers i had to get my seeds into the ground and nourish that soil."

I want to rid my body of its decayed parts. I want to be like a well maintained rose bush. the stomach plaque i lost when they pumped my stomach. i know there are other deposits that my body is just overwhelmed with. When John Wayne Died they removed 50 pounds of stomach plaque from him. Sometimes i wonder if those hippie cleanses are that stupid, or annoying.
  • Current Music
    i made a mix for this mood.

(no subject)

my favourite songs right now.

Lovers spit ( the version off of bee hives
If you see her, say hello ( i think this is a jeff buckly original, i may be wrong
side of the road (beck- sea change
NYC ( interpol
Southern state ( bright eyes, lame enough
24 hours (Joy division
sometimes ( My Bloody valentine
I wish i was the moon/deep red bells( neko case
and a bunch of wilco songs.