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Oct. 21st, 2006 @ 02:36 am raaage!
Current Mood: otaku
Tags: ,
Rage of the Dragons: a tag-team fighting game loosely based on the Double Dragon franchise, in which each of the default teams are couples. Such a cute concept.

(Well, except for Kang and Mr. Jones. And they might be gay.)

Nice art, deep fighting, beautiful backgrounds, memorable characters. There's a morbid bandaged girl named Cassandra, who may or may not bear a vague resemblance to someone I know, and a loli-girl unsubtly named Annie Murakami, and an even less subtly named Alice Caroll. Unfortunately, you can't play as my livejournal icon. I was hoping he'd make a cameo appearance somewhere, since this is Double Dragon and all, but alas.

The AI is way too good at this game. Not that it's unfair--it's not--but goodness, the first guy you fight against should not be able to chain a tag counter, a First Impact autohit combo, and a super into 12-hit death! Learning curve? What learning curve? Sigh...maybe I just suck at this game...
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Oct. 21st, 2006 @ 04:06 pm freshmen! here's why so many of you are struggling with papers
This is the template for a standard two-page high school essay:

This is my thesis. This is a a summary of the rest of the paper, which is just detailed enough to make the rest of the paper completely unnecessary.

Introduction. Outline point one. Important obvious fact. Citation. Half-assed observation. Clincher.

Introduction. Outline point two. Less important obvious fact. Citation. Half-assed observation. Clincher.

Introduction. Outline point three. Irrelevant fact, which I threw in to make the paper the proper length. Citation. Half-assed observation. Clincher.

In summary, this is my thesis again. Please give me full marks for using five-point essay form, even though I could have communicated everything I just said, with better clarity, in a bullet-point outline, and have said nothing interesting or insightful. And that is why I believe my thesis is true, even though I have presented no real evidence to support it.

Works cited.

This is the template for a typical six-to-eight-page college paper:

Introduction. Bold, unusual-to-the-point-of-offensiveness thesis statement.

Extremely in-depth summary of all prior research.

bullshit bullshit bullshit bullshit bullshit bullshit bullshit bullshit bullshit bullshit cleverly researched bullshit bullshit dear goodness I'm running out of bullshit more bullshit more bullshit irrelevant bullshit less relevant bullshit half-page citation more bullshit

(Continue for eight to ten pages.)

Half-assed, sleep-deprived conclusion.


Keep this in mind, slightly-littler ones, and you should do fine.

Also: Professors in college who grade papers as if they were written in high school (NO CLINCHER AT END OF PARAGRAPH -5) need to be reminded why no one in academia actually uses five-paragraph form.
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Oct. 21st, 2006 @ 05:26 pm for michelle and lisa

From the Star Wars CCG.

What's so special about this picture, you ask?

Well, from left to right...it's Shannon Baksa as Mara Jade, Timothy Zahn as Talon Karrde, and Michael A. Stackpole as Corran Horn.

Authors who portray the characters they created are awesome. And Shannon Baksa is hot.

Kind of glad Lucas didn't cast himself as Luke, though...
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Oct. 21st, 2006 @ 06:11 pm my baby
Tags: ,
RZ-1 A-wing interceptor. Ohhhh yeah.

Only Imperial ship faster than these things in the original trilogy are the TIE Defenders, and TIE Defenders are just unfair. These things could outrun a squad of eyeballs and singlehandedly destroy a Super Star Destroyer on the way back. (Happened in RotJ. A-wing + kamikaze = bye bye capital ship.)

Sure, the X-wings have proton torpedoes, which are nice for blowing up slow-moving oafs like supply containers and Death Stars. But just try taking down one of those zippy-ki-yay TIE Interceptors with one of those. Anyone can hit the broad side of a spice barge with a torp, but it takes the Force and a handful of well-aimed concussion missiles to blow a squad of squint pilots off their perch--in a single run. You can keep your X-wings for their space superiority and your Y-wings for blowing shit up and your B-wings for looking stupid, but the A-wing is a ship-to-ship ship. A dogfighter's dog. Concussion missiles are where it's at.

Of course, you could always waste your engine power on laser cannons and use those instead, like some kind of wuss. But where's the fun in that?


Why am I doing this instead of writing my paper?
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Oct. 21st, 2006 @ 08:33 pm praise the Lord
At dinner with Todd at the Mandarin, I broke open my fortune cookie, and the fortune was just one word:

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