?

Log in

No account? Create an account

Next Entry

Ben, Clearly Misguided

  • Aug. 11th, 2004 at 2:16 PM
Butterfly wings
Ben has recently posted a poll that claims it will determine where the Real Ultimate Power lies. Modeled after sports contests, the first round winners will face each other in the second round, and so on and so on.

I submit that this poll is shortsighted and misguided. Round 1 features such match-ups as "Vampires vs. Former Presidents" and "Indians vs. Zombies" and "Robots vs. The Mafia" and "Wizards/Witches vs. Aliens."

I say this is far too limiting. Ben is a divider, not a uniter. Instead of those match-ups, let's try to broaden our horizons a bit. How about, for example, "Vampire Former Presidents vs. Zombie Indians" or "Mafia-controlled Robots vs. Magic-using Aliens"?

Thus, I present to you, the Real Real Ultimate Power Poll.

Poll #334448 Real Real Ultimate Power Poll, Round 1

Pirate Elves or Viking Mummies?

Pirate Elves
33(60.0%)
Viking Mummies
22(40.0%)

Werewolf Cowboys or Ninja Bigfoot?

Werewolf Cowboys
28(50.9%)
Ninja Bigfoot
27(49.1%)

Vampire Former Presidents or Zombie Indians?

Vampire Former Presidents
36(65.5%)
Zombie Indians
19(34.5%)

Magic-Using Mafia or Robot Aliens?

Magic-Using Mafia
26(47.3%)
Robot Aliens
29(52.7%)

Comments

chuckm wrote:
Aug. 11th, 2004 06:33 pm (UTC)
Werewolf Cowboys vs. Ninja Bigfoot was the toughest. Somethign as big as bigfoot... that can move like a ninja? Potentially unstoppable! But then I realized that just because he's a ninja, doesn't mean bigfoot would make for a good ninja.

I mean, it doesn't matter how well you hide in shadows when you smell like wet dog.
belladonna_ wrote:
Aug. 11th, 2004 06:37 pm (UTC)
Very good point. Me, I can't believe Vampire Former Presidents are losing! And to Zombie Indians! Like, what Zombie Indian could possibly kick Vampire Andrew Jackson's ass? or Vampire Teddy Roosevelt? Or Vampire Bill Clinton!!
(no subject) - chuckm - Aug. 11th, 2004 06:46 pm (UTC) Expand
(no subject) - impero - Aug. 11th, 2004 06:56 pm (UTC) Expand
(no subject) - belladonna_ - Aug. 11th, 2004 07:01 pm (UTC) Expand
(no subject) - dunbarius - Aug. 11th, 2004 07:15 pm (UTC) Expand
(no subject) - dona_lucrecia - Aug. 11th, 2004 07:41 pm (UTC) Expand
(no subject) - dunbarius - Aug. 11th, 2004 08:30 pm (UTC) Expand
massivecliche wrote:
Aug. 11th, 2004 06:41 pm (UTC)
man, ninja bigfoot would be beautiful.
belladonna_ wrote:
Aug. 11th, 2004 07:23 pm (UTC)
My co-worker Luke says, "Ninja Bigfoot is a war machine, Nancy. A war machine."
(no subject) - massivecliche - Aug. 11th, 2004 09:39 pm (UTC) Expand
scoots_honor wrote:
Aug. 11th, 2004 08:00 pm (UTC)
And so unstoppable.
Hordes of anything would fall to a huge katana blade and throwing stars and whatever other delicious decapitation deploying treats NinjaFoot would use.
dunbarius wrote:
Aug. 11th, 2004 06:42 pm (UTC)
I'm glad you took care of the typo.

The problem I have with your poll is that these things could probably never exist. Like zombies exist, but maybe not zombie indians. And it would be very, very rare for them to battle. I just think your poll is far more fantasy than mine.

But creative, nonetheless...
belladonna_ wrote:
Aug. 11th, 2004 07:04 pm (UTC)
Now who's the nay-sayer?
(no subject) - dunbarius - Aug. 11th, 2004 07:10 pm (UTC) Expand
jenifoto wrote:
Aug. 11th, 2004 06:58 pm (UTC)
Zombies are the new Pirate...however, I think Robot Aliens should be the new Zombies...
belladonna_ wrote:
Aug. 11th, 2004 07:04 pm (UTC)
No one likes Mafia Magic-users. Why is that? I like Mafia Magic-Users. It would make a lot of sense!
(no subject) - jenifoto - Aug. 11th, 2004 07:09 pm (UTC) Expand
(no subject) - chuckm - Aug. 11th, 2004 07:13 pm (UTC) Expand
(no subject) - belladonna_ - Aug. 11th, 2004 07:14 pm (UTC) Expand
(no subject) - jenifoto - Aug. 11th, 2004 07:49 pm (UTC) Expand
(no subject) - belladonna_ - Aug. 11th, 2004 07:55 pm (UTC) Expand
(no subject) - jenifoto - Aug. 11th, 2004 07:57 pm (UTC) Expand
(no subject) - dunbarius - Aug. 11th, 2004 10:13 pm (UTC) Expand
(no subject) - chuckm - Aug. 11th, 2004 08:28 pm (UTC) Expand
(no subject) - chuckm - Aug. 11th, 2004 07:10 pm (UTC) Expand
(no subject) - belladonna_ - Aug. 11th, 2004 07:28 pm (UTC) Expand
(no subject) - dona_lucrecia - Aug. 11th, 2004 07:44 pm (UTC) Expand
(no subject) - belladonna_ - Aug. 11th, 2004 07:50 pm (UTC) Expand
jenifoto wrote:
Aug. 11th, 2004 07:51 pm (UTC)
I think Pirate Elves would be truly scary.
belladonna_ wrote:
Aug. 11th, 2004 07:55 pm (UTC)
I think they'd be hot ass. :)
jenifoto wrote:
Aug. 11th, 2004 07:56 pm (UTC)
I would like to respectfully submit Zuni Warrior dolls as being worthy adversaries for all of the above, as well as being damn scary.
zuni
belladonna_ wrote:
Aug. 11th, 2004 08:22 pm (UTC)
Eek!!

That's kind of like a combo of most of the above. :)

My personal nightmare as a child was the Shadow Man from the Twilight Zone. Jeezy creezy, that was scary.
docdetroit wrote:
Aug. 12th, 2004 08:24 am (UTC)
I had a very tough time with this.....considering that:
A) I helped create the original poll
and
B) GOOD GOD! What am I doing up so late?!?!?!?!?!?!

I regretfully had to vote for Viking Mummies because they are very strong and menacing. While I do like Pirates above all else, the elf idea did not strike images of charismatic characters from LoTR. Instead I pictured One-eyed Keebler Elves with Scurvy. Spreading germs all over my E.L. Fudge! Bad Ernie!

Again, the idea of a ninja bigfoot is awesome....until you remember that because it is a ninja doesn't make it a "war machine". Think Beverly Hills Ninja.....Chris Farley as a ninja could prove that size can be a hinderance.

I really wanted the Vampiric Former Presidents to be victorious....but I could only imagine that they would have wooden teeth with fangs. Damn you George W.(ashington)!

Robot aliens are just too intense to overcome the Mafia Wizards.

belladonna_ wrote:
Aug. 12th, 2004 01:10 pm (UTC)
the elf idea did not strike images of charismatic characters from LoTR. Instead I pictured One-eyed Keebler Elves with Scurvy. Spreading germs all over my E.L. Fudge! Bad Ernie!

Bwahahahahaha!

That's pretty good. Me, OTOH, I got the Orlando Bloom + Johnny Depp in a ship that looks like Rivendell imagery going on. That, my friend, is some mighty fine imagery.

I hadn't considered the wooden fangs aspect. But I think you'd have to admit that even the more recent former presidents would be formiddable vampires: would you want to take on Vampire Richard Nixon? Or even Vampire Ronald Reagan? Hell, Zombie Ronald Reagan almost ran the country into the ground. ;) Also, there's what? Forty-three former presidents? That's a pretty good-sized vampire troop. But, vampire/zombie combat is weird... do zombies want to eat vampire brains? Can vampires suck zombie blood? So I think that really, it all comes down to personal opinion on style of fighting and advantages/disadvantages.

Let's just see how they all do in Round 2!

Latest Month

April 2005
S M T W T F S
     12
3456789
10111213141516
17181920212223
24252627282930
Powered by LiveJournal.com
Designed by
HP.com/gwen