December 12th, 2001



i REALLY, REALLY wanted to sleep. instead, lemonmerchant takes me to the old hangout, klimak's. i dont buy one drink, we play LOTS of metallica, and down a large amount of shots in half an hour.

the bartendress, whose name i selfishly forget - WILL be attending the chamber at some point htis weekend. it is up to you, my minions, to make her feel welcome. she is indeed one very cool person.

she asked how i was taking it all - i tell her my story - in the end - i say there's someone more deserving, and the foolishness is beyond comprehension. then we talk about our grammas with alzheimers. i like bartenders with brains.

and thank you, mattchoo, even IF you used me as a revenge tactic. ba ha ha ha ha.
  • Current Mood
    drunk drunk

i'm here.

farken back at work. i dont really want an office job anymore. really, i want to be a housewife and make art at home. not very feminist, no - but isnt being feminist having the power to make one's own life choices?

we'll see, after today, if i actually still have a job, or if they're going to conveniently lay me off. oh i'm such a problem worker with my blue hair and facial piercings and excessive sick days. er, "sick" days.

blah blah blah blah blah. mundane, mundane, mundane. i dont take kindly to robots. ohhhhh if i say what i REALLY have to say you'd need a fire extinguisher for your FLAMING ASSHOLE.
  • Current Mood
    blah blah

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lemme add to that.

so we have a reeeeeeeeeeeeeally long talk on my drive home.

i want to be his friend, but all kinds of flags are flying everywhere. he explains himself. i SORT of understand. i mean, he's not the racist i thought, i come to figure out.

how much shit have we, as "freaks", tolerated from the "mundanes"? how many times have you seen a gap wearin, starbucks sippin, SUV drivin yuppie come down the street and you absolutely HATE them because they're all the same, non-understanding pigfuckers that harrass you at the club?

isnt that bigotry, too?

stereotyping, generalizing, pidgeon holing. its our nature to classify.

but he uses that word. that word that i cant even type or even BRING myself to say. i'm not like that. and he uses it to term people regardless of their race, creed or whatever - he uses it just as another insult like "pigfucker' or "asshole" - but it makes me cringe.

i'm not like that.

IF you want to be a racist, IF you want to hate a certain group of people solely on their belief or look, that is fine by me, it is your freedom to do so. the instant you act out that hate, interfering with others' freedoms to their own choices, preventing them the right to live, well, that's when you fall down the evolutionary chain to somewhere under plankton.

the conversation, however, is not over. more as i try to figure this bugger out.


FRESH NEW BABY ferrets at the pet store. ohmygod they are SO adorable. just what i need, another mouth to feed. one reminded me of my own bondage barbie stealing monster. (vintagoth: yes, i still have her, but the ferret adores her. in fact, he sleeps with her, its kinda funny.)

1 bag cat food, 1 bag litter, 1 bag corn cob for the ferret cage. i need one of those little old lady grocery carts.

i pull up to my secret entrance, open the trunk, rip spill. cat litter catches on my cd box and i'd say about 1/4 of it is in my trunk now. ohhh but that frosts my ovaries.

but that's ok - i also purchased a lifetime supply of kung pao - spicy enough to make your eyes bleed, the only way to enjoy it. i'm a kung pao snob, i've only really found one place around here that makes it well. i also found some vagina-centric books on sale, and now i've got a vanilla bubble bath with my name on it.

oh oh oh. leftover sushi, extra wasabi in the fridge, too. i'm set for the week, yeah baby.