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I get what I deserve. I can take care of myself. [14 Dec 2004|10:29pm]
Don't ask, I probably won't tell you.
Just know that everything just came falling apart.
</3>***EDIT:</b>if anyone else needs to be honest with what they think of me, please do it now.
I like how a lot of people I thought were true friends made me think they were really my friends.

I really don't care about anything anymore.
32 comments|post comment

I was only fooling myself. [14 Dec 2004|06:32pm]
Everyone needs to listen to Kelly Clarkson-Since you've been gone.
haha seriously it has been stuck in my head for days, great song. Anyhoo...

It has been SO cold lately.
I thought yesterday was cold, but today was FREEZING! I need to stop wearing flip-flops. Hah that might add to the reasons why I am so cold lately.
I'm excited in some ways for Christmas, but not really looking forward to it as much as I usually am. This year is considerably different from previous years. Hmm...I'm not much into the holiday spirit like I usually am. I am usually all decked out in 'holiday cheer' by now. Dressed up, santa hat, all that mess. I haven't even worn any bells! It's crazy.
Eh...exams week sucks. I have so much studying to do and a lot of extra credit to turn in. I'm only worried about my math exam, the others shouldn't be all that bad. I hate math :/ it's the devil. Just like Ms. Wagner. haha
I need to go buy some more sweaters, maybe I'll find a pretty coat. That'd be nice.
Alright, if anyone wants to study together in the next few days, tell me what's up :) because studying is always a lot easier when a friend is there with you, plus I could use some help. I'm not too good at concentrating by myself. lol

Friday I think I'm going home early. I don't have to be there for 4th period because I am a T/A and coach hyder and mrs. smith said I could leave early because I have no exam to take. Hmm I don't know what to do. I'll figure something out.
Drama hasn't been too bad, things are slowly getting better. Even though there are some little problems, but whatever. I can make my own decisions and I will. Can't make everyone happy.

I need to go frickin' christmas shopping!!!
Seriously people, tell me what you want. lol


p.s. I'm glad I got a few things worked out today.
I just hope things keep looking up.
There are seriously some great people at Rockledge that you can just talk to about anything.
maybe girls aren't that bad afterall.

11 comments|post comment

KELLY CLARKSON [12 Dec 2004|09:17pm]
Here's the thing
we started out friends
It was cool, but it was all pretend
Yeah, Yeah
since you've been gone

You dedicated,
you took the time

Wasn't long 'till I called you mine
Yeah Yeah
Since you've been gone

...And all you'd ever hear me say
Is how I'd picture me with you
that's all </i>you'd ever hear me say...</i>

But since you've been gone
I can breath for the first time
I'm so moving on, yeah yeah
thanks to you, now I get what I want.

Since you've been gone.

How can I put it? You put me on.
I even fell for the stupid love song...
yeah yeah since you've been gone.
How come I never hear you say "I just wanna be with you"
Guess you never felt that way...

But since you've been gone
I Can breathe for the first time
I'm so moving on, yeah Yeah
Thanks to you
Now I get what I want
Since You've Been Gone

You had your chance, you blew it
Out of sight, out of mind
Shut your mouth, I just can't take it

Again and again and again and again...

</3>DALLAS!!!</b> you knooooooooo
I'm glad we had that talk :) love<3
8 comments|post comment

BOOM!!!! [06 Dec 2004|06:27pm]
Today was such a long day...
After school, on the way home, me, Bryon ad Lindsay were listening to "Knuck if you Buck" haha. It was just a normal day driving home. We were stopped om traffic and we got rear-ended. I didn't realize what exactly happened at first. Then it finalyl registered in my mind, and I thought Bryon passed out, I had to put his car in PARK. I was scared because he looked like he was really hurt. Then my head started to hurt like a bitch. My clip slammed into my head, ouch. Lindsay's neck was hurting. So I turned around and saw the girl crying that had hit us. I felt bad because she looked really upset and her car got pretty fucked up in the front. I couldn't tell who it was at first, but I'm pretty sure it was Bridgette? I hope she's alright,I felt bad :(. I wanted to ask her if she was alright but we had to stay int he car. Well, I hope she feels better.

We sat there filling out police reports and stuff for what seemed like forever. Then my Dad finally made it to come get me. He made me go to the Emergency Room. I was so mad because I didn't want to go. I fought with him forever and he frickin forced me to go. But my mom ended up driving me up there...and we waited until they saw me. AHH! They asked me to take off all my clothes, put on a gown so they could take a catscan, I didn't think that was necessary so I refused to do it. The doctor came in to talk to me and said a catscan would help, but I didn't want to do it. So after some debates and physical checking, I had to wait some more. They gave me some Vicodin and a bracelet and sent me on my way. It was really cold in the room. I got to have some apple sauce, too. Yum. I was trying to sleep in the waiting room, but my mom wouldn't let me go to sleep.
I got three prescriptions because I have a ...head contusion. I like that word...contusion. I have to take pills every day which sucks because I cannot swallow pills for my life. Bleh...life sucks. haha I have to take Ibuprofin, Vicodin, and some muscle relaxer called Norflex. I hope Bryon is okay :( I haven't been able to reach him since I left. His neck was hurting pretty bad, so I hope he's okay. If anyoen gets ahold of him, please tell me how he is.

Well, basically today was scary, but I'm glad everyone's okay. I want to post a picture of my hospital bracelet. It has a barcode. Hah
So I just have a headache and I'm a little tired and shaky, but I'm fine.
But I'll be "hurting" for the next week. The doctor told me it'd feel like "I'd gone a few rounds with Mike Tyson". Haha. And I guess I lost. I'm just thankful no one got seriously hurt. Phew. Makes me appreciate things a lot more. Well, I'm waiting for my medicine to kick in so I can start feeling "loopy" because my head is killing me. I need some relaxation...I feel so down today.

p.s. today was just a really bad day all around.
ugh I'm so frustrated and upset. I just don't know
28 comments|post comment

The weirdest thing just happened...

Some lady called me, and my mom answered and told me the phone was for me and that somebody was calling calling from a Tampa center. So I talked to this lady, Lian...and she was talking about modeling/acting and whatnot. She said they wanted me to come down for auditions to model. She gave me all these details and told me to write a bunch of stuff down. It was weird because she knew my name...and i didn't even tell her. Then she wanted to talk to my mom.
This is weird because I never signed up for anything that has to do with modeling or went to an audition. Strange.
People are...weird.
Wrong Laura maybe?

I think it's a joke...
or something along those lines.
I'm confused as hell though.

</3>the odds are against me</i>

OMG!!! I like totally am becoming a model. YES MY DREAM.
Hmmm...EXCEPT NOT AT ALL. wow cool, I write about something that happened and suddenly it's a big deal.

P.S. MY BFFH LAURA GOT A CALL TOO! LOOKS LIKE EVERYONE REALLY IS BECOMING A MODEL!!! crazy...or maybe it's the popular name Laura...we're hot stuff.

P.P.S. GET BACK MuhFUCKER you don know me like that
26 comments|post comment

choke and die please [EDIT] [30 Nov 2004|06:15pm]
I AM SO FRUSTRATED. It's a sad time :(
I just want all this drama and arguing to go away.
I don't want friendships to get ruined over nothing.
It's confusing because...it isn't specific problems or anything.
Just everything lately...hmm.
aknjdfhbwegdbdgfjv I need something fun to do.

fuck this.

I hate writing something, then feeling like it wasn't worth it.
Just writing something out of anger, heat of the moment kind of thing.
Sorry, I keep having these stupid fits.

None of this matters anymore, it's pointless.
</3> everything you say to me..</i>
8 comments|post comment

24's on tha truck that's nasty [27 Nov 2004|05:45pm]
EDIT:For a special, special boy who is ever so cool...
Some people are so fucking stupid and immature.
way to be a little girl about things.
get over yourself fuckface.
you're really not that important
for me to give a damn about you.
I could care less what you think.
wanna try to be "cool" with me now?
damn it, we were such "goooood friends"
well, here, take some advice from a friend...
GET SOME FUCKING BALLS. :D It'd be very much appreciated.


so I have my immature moments.
I was pissed. Still am, but ooooh well.
14 comments|post comment

now who's crying.... [23 Nov 2004|04:45pm]
[ mood | content ]

Alicia Keys-"Karma"
lyricsCollapse )

So true.
Good song.
Very good song.

Other than that...it's almost TURKEY DAY!
Okay, so I don't eat turkey, or any other meat, but I like mashed potatoes. :)
No school thursday and friday so that should be fun. Hopefully.

8 comments|post comment

AHHH I KNOW YOU LOVED THIS SONG!!!!! [19 Nov 2004|05:08pm]
Yeah, I like that, You know what I mean,
You're looking kinda fly tonight girl, What's up, Check it!

Baby when the lights go out, I'll show you what it's all about
Coming at you girl, You know you I like this girl, Here we go!

I ain't sorry for the way I feel,
I know you think I'm being insincere,
From the way I'm treating you,
I never wanted to be so unkind,
The only one thing on my mind,
Is just kicking it with you girl!

Baby it's not the way I feel, you know you must believe me,
Baby it's not part of the deal, Oh, No, No!

Baby when the lights go out, Every single word cannot express,
The love and tenderness, I'll show you what it's all about,
Babe I swear you will succumb to me, So baby come to me,
When the lights go out!

I know you think it may be just a lie,
Ain't no use in putting up a fight,
Cos my heart is set on you,
I see the truth its in your eyes,
I ain't fooled by your thin disguise,
I can see I'm getting through babe!

Girl don't deny the way you feel, You know you've gotta trust me,
Give a chance to prove I'm real, Oh, Yeah, Yeah!

Baby when the lights go out, Every single word cannot express,
The love and tenderness, I'll show you what it's all about,
Babe I swear you will succumb to me, So baby come to me,
When the lights go out! Every single word cannot express,
The love and tenderness, I'll show you what it's all about,
Babe I swear you will succumb to me, So baby come to me,
When the lights go out!

When I flick da switch, Make ya hips wanna dip now,
I can get you off, Cos I'm ready and equipped now,
Swing for me baby give me all that you got,
Never wanna stop cos ya make me feel hot,
I know what you wanna do, And that I feel the same way too,
Give me what ya want through, The days and the nights,
Yeah its about time, That we turned out the lights!

Now for the memoriesCollapse )
I used to love that song in 5th grade...maybe 4th grade.
Man, FIVE was great. and you know you love that song. I do!!!
alright, well I just wanted to share that I finally found the song and I will be listening to it for hours. haha
IT'S THE WEEKEND!!! Yay, time for some fun. bliss. happiness. drama.

heart,&</b>heart, laura
9 comments|post comment

just drop it [17 Nov 2004|09:56pm]
Today was an okay day. Classes went well, I'm loving this weather.
I need to go winter clothes shopping soon and get some more warm clothes.
I went over the Bliven's today. We waited for Bobby to come home from work [we were suprising him for his b-day] and I hung out with Stevey, Joey, Scott, Robbie, Steve, Shaun, Eddy, Billy, and Joe. I met their grandparents, too. lol Warm, fuzzies were pretty funny. We looked at baby pictures and stuff. Then Bobby came home and we had cake and he opened his cards and stuff. It was fun, lots of laughs.
Eddy brought me home a few minutes ago. The car he's driving for now is sweet. It's fast, too. I wanna see his new paint job!!!

I'm tired.
heart,&</b>heart, laura

2 comments|post comment

I like it
it's rather chilly today
I wish I didn't have piano
I got some new hair-ties today
I saw scott for the first time in a few ...weeks
He must have been hiding. hah. Oh, Katie is a really nice girl
anyways, just a short update. buhbye

maybe there's hope for me yet!!
heart,&</b>heart, laura
12 comments|post comment

nothing even matters [11 Nov 2004|03:15pm]
[ mood | sad ]

Life could not suck any more right now.
I'm too frustrated to cry, but that's all I feel like doing.
That is all I have to say because that pretty much sums it all up.


25 comments|post comment

what it is hoe, whats up [08 Nov 2004|04:37pm]
I'm sick of people asking me stupid questions.
I'm sick of people pretending to be my friend.
I'm sick of people acting like they know everything.
I'm sick of "friends" that believe everyone BUT me.
I'm sick of my english class and how cold it is.
I'm sick of people talking shit about me.
I'm sick of people getting in my business.
I'm sick of never being good enough.

Those are just some things I'm sick of in case you couldn't tell.

Uh...I had a pretty good weekend.
I went to M.I. with Callahan on friday. I got mad because he was being dumb and wouldn't play bloody knuckles anymore. [I won!!!] He was laughing a lot and I got mad because nothing was funny. Not really mad, just confused. It was kind of awkward because I didn't know any of his friends or anything. They're nice, I just had no clue of what to say. His mom showed me pictures of when he was little...he wore a lot of pink...I mean, salmon. Hah.
Saturday was fun. I went over Dall's and a bunch of people joined us for awhile. Bobby, Stevey, Jeshi, Laura, Dan, mary-Beth and Sumner. Lindsay, Caitlin, Chris and some boys stopped by to say hey, then they left. We played twister, listened to a frickin lot of music and made a mess pretty much. Fun times. Stevey had this wild urge to go on a walk. Bobby fell asleep at one point. I have the coolest socks ever by the way. I MADE THE PRETTIEST BRACELET EVER!!!!! so many colors.
Yesterday I hung out with BARBIE! Lauren and Eddy. I love Eddy's mom. She's so nice, and Tut is the awesomest cat ever. We watched "Old School", my first time seeing it. Haha it was so funny. YOU'RE MY BOY BLUE! Then we went to Dairy Queen in Merritt Island because...because we...can. Me and Lauren saw Blue in the car next to us. haha. Eddy blinded us with his brights, so Lauren turned her blinker on. lol We stopped by the see the Blivens, Billy, Camden and Shaun before I went home. I got home about 8.

I like mint oreo blizzards :)
and the brownie one really tastes like brownies.
19 comments|post comment

the results are in [05 Nov 2004|04:38pm]
EDIT: busy, busy weekend
post comment

you can buck if you wanna buck motha fucka [03 Nov 2004|09:42pm]

Duh, so obvious. Yay for George W. Bush!
Oh, and if you disagree, feel free to say so, but keep your arguments to yourself.
I'm not asking you to like Bush, support Bush, be happy about his victory or anything like that.
My journal, MY opinion. I'm happy with the outcome, let me be happy.
I am not going to get in a fight with someone because your stupid candidate lost. :)

so anyways, today was a good day.
After school, I went with Barbie, Eddy and Joe to the melbourne mall to shop around.
We went to Olive Garden afterwards and I feel sick. I swear my body does not get along with that place.
I think I'm going to throw up. :( ugh...
We went to pick up Joey then we came back to my house and watched some of "Sandlot", we'll have to finish on sunday because we didn't get through the whole thing. Joey knows the whole movie by heart, trust me we all know. cough QUOTES THE WHOLE THING cough. haha
yeah my mom made us cookies. lol

alllllright, you all enjoy your nights.
14 comments|post comment

just another day to regret [01 Nov 2004|08:34pm]
I'm hoping that all of this is just a phase?
Or a bump in the road because I'm in desperate need of things going back to normal.
I want all the drama and weirdness to stop so I can get back to my life and possibly be happy.

I hate losing friends.
Especially a best friend.
Ugh, so frustrated. Things are so awkward now.
I'm happy for the friends I still have. They mean a lot to me.
I just want everything to get fixed.

Vote Bush!!

Do the right thing, vote BUSH!
3 comments|post comment

there's a missing piece [30 Oct 2004|07:58pm]
I hate having these continuous bad moods all the time. Ugh.

Last night was fun and I hung out with good friends, but I couldn't help but get the feeling they were mad at me or something. I dunno. I guess I'll just talk to them. Even though today it didn't seem like any of them wanted to talk to me. So anyways, last night I ended up going to Barbie's with Eddy, Joey, and Joe. Bobby came, too. We went up there to see her and Lauren. We planned on watching the "Sandlot" but we never really got around to actually watching it. The unicorns and pretty princess toys kept us pretty busy the whole time. I was quiet for awhile, but eventually things got normal and we had fun. We played the piano and Joey and Eddy played the guitar. So did Lauren. Joey got stuck to my necklace for a minute and Joe made friends with the daisy and unicorn. Then we listened to some N'Sync and other old stuff. Barbie does a pretty good impression of William Hung. Haha. I never really got to read the "hottie files". lol don't ask. Oh yeah we went out on the dock again for a little while. Lauren seemed sad, but I'm not sure. Hmm.
Bobby, Joey and I left at about 11:45 to go home and we said bye to everyone else. We hit like every red light on the way home. It was kind of funny. For awhile it smelled like VIX which was really weird. I like the smell of VIX.
Today I woke up real late. I didn't mean to sleep so late. Yeah, never went to the mall and I wasn't awake early enough to go fishing. I guess Eddy and them caught some fish and killed some? lol
I just went to Starbucks a few minutes ago. I'm happy it's so close. I got an iced mocha.
Hope everyone has fun at their homecomings tonight. Barbie and Amanda are gonna have to tell me ALLLL about it. Callahan and Arash are both at M.I's that should be interesting because they're like bff. Except not.

I need to clarify plans for tomorrow and everything.
9 comments|post comment

you act like I care [28 Oct 2004|09:42pm]
Wow, some of my "friends" are being really shitty friends lately. You guys suck!
And you know, I don't care. If you're going to be pussies and talk shit, go ahead.
I don't need you, don't want you and could care less what you say behind my back. Blame all the shit on me.
I need to do my math homework, and get ready to fail the quiz tomorrow. FUN.

yessss, more drama.
I can't wait until this weekend.
I'll have fun with some good friends.
Hocus Pocus is on again! At least one good thing for today.


*EDIT:P.S. people are so fucking gay.
stop asking me stupid questions and stop talking shit like I don't know.
Don't come up to me and be like "hey laura I love you" when you were just talking shit about me yesterday.
Don't touch me, don't talk to me. Everything is not fucking fine you dumbasses.
Stop acting like it's all me because it's more you guys than me.
come on, don't be an idiot.
6 comments|post comment

unicorn love forever, me and my girlfriend! [27 Oct 2004|10:04pm]
I love Barbie's dock. haha
The lunar eclipse still hasn't happened, so I'm going to wait for it. I want to see it.
My unicorn Speckles [amanda] made varsity soccer! Luckyyy. YAY!!! Everyone congratulate her.
Anyways, me and my love of my life Sprinkles had a night on the town with Eddy and Joe. We hung out at my house for awhile and skated. Well, we rolled around on the skateboards. Same thing. Then we went to Dairy Queen and Wendy's, then frickin waited for the eclipse. We ended up watching the fish jump around instead.

soooo, this weekend me and Barbie need to get our unicorn stuff!<3
and sunday is going to be funnnn. If everything goes well and there's a fiesta.

Other than that fun stuff, everything else is all fucked up and confusing. I just don't know what to dp about any of it. Nothing I really can do except hope it all turns out well because I'm not sure how to fix it. Ugh...so dumb. askjadyabuiryvwrvyadba that's some pent up anger and frustration. At least there isn't any huge drama. Life could be worse? Yeah it could.Alright, I'm going to go watch "Law and Order", watch the eclipse, and go to sleep. I'm tired out. Not happy at all. Hmm :/

p.s. Gotta find a sparkeler.
3 comments|post comment

FCAT party day [22 Oct 2004|04:10pm]
Words cannot express how fucking pissed I am.
well, maybe they can but I don't feel like using that language right now.
I'm too mad to talk about it and too bleh to type about it.

so tonight...maybe movies? I dunno. I guess just call me guys.
I really hope this weekend is fun because today sucked so bad. Except I made a new friend.

damn it. I fucked up. ugh oh well. Learned my lesson I guess.
At least I have great friends that I love. They're so nice and caring and I love each one for trying to cheer me up today. thanks guys!
4 comments|post comment

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