unlocking the tomb of the ancients

Hey what's up livejournal I totally thought I'd forgotten my password entirely and would never return but apparently Firefox remembered it for me?

Anyhow, if anyone is actually still using this and has my dusty old account on their friends list, you may care to know that I have basically entirely migrated to Tumblr -- you can find me there as oodlyenough, where you can also see how about a year ago I tripped and fell into video games as my new Thing, and that in 2017 I wrote a lot of fic for a niche ship in a niche video game fandom. Steven Moffat managed to outlast my ability to care about Doctor Who, although perhaps things will turn again next fall with Jodie Whittaker.

Anyway, come say hi or whatever! Happy new year!

For posterity, though, and since I just did it on Tumblr, here's my 2017 fandom year in review meme:

1. Your main fandom of the year:
(Tales from the) Borderlands??? Somehow??? Who knew. I can’t believe I played this game back in like February man, this is the first thing in years to hold my attention span for that long and it’s a fandom of a dozen people, but I’m happy to have one; incidentally my answer for 2015 was to have an existential crisis about not having a fandom.
2. Your favorite film this year: Probably Get Out. What an excellent film
3. Your favorite book this year: Lmfao I honestly don’t think I read a single book in 2017. I read a lot of fanfiction?
4. Your favorite album or song this year: Actually FROM 2017? That’s hard because my new thing is, obviously, to get into stuff two years late, in which case the answer is probably Canadian icon Carly Rae Jepsen’s EMOTION.
5. Your favorite TV show this year: Orphan Black, but if we wanna give it to a show I watched for the first time this year, Wynonna Earp. “Shows I watched in 2017″ is an incredibly short list.
6. Your favorite LJ community Tumblr this year: LMAO
7. Your best new fandom discovery of the year: Tales from the Borderlands obviously, can’t believe this dumb Telltale game I adamantly ignored for two years and only purchased accidentally via a bundle wound up being my fave thing in ages.
8. Your biggest fandom disappointment of the year: Before the Storm. I mean, I could’ve guessed that a Life is Strange prequel was a messy, bad idea, but it could’ve at least been executed way better than it was. It can’t even stand on its own two feet as a decent game, let alone as a functional prequel.
9. Your TV boyfriend of the year: I didn’t watch tv anymore so like, I’ll assume this means “fictional media boyfriend” in which case the horrible horrible truth is Rhys.
10. Your TV girlfriend of the year: Using the same criteria above, tbh all of my Laura Bailey wives but particularly Fiona (Man, my answer to everything in 2015 was “Jessica Jones”.)
11. Your biggest squee moment of the year: I had to think about this one because I’m not really a person who experiences the emotion that was once described as “squee” but I’ll go with meeting Freema Agyeman after Apologia. Doctor Who bingo card complete!
12. Your most missed old fandom: I feel about Doctor Who the way I assume people feel about ex lovers they are truly 100% over and just wish well – like, nostalgic but detached.
13. Your fandom you haven’t tried yet, but want to? Eh the fandoms I love most are always things that blindside me. I’ve vaguely been meaning to watch The Good Place for ages but I’m not that motivated and I also am unlikely to be fan-y about it.
14. Your biggest anticipation of the New Year: The Last of Us II!!!! I can’t wait to crush zombie skulls as my lesbian daughter Ellie and/or her buff ass mom Laura Bailey. Also Jessica Jones season 2, the Walking Dead Game s4, uhHhh tentatively the Max/Chloe “farewell” episode but the rest of BTS left me wary.
dw :: ten :: aloha

"a hermit with friends?" "hermits united."

Companions Only
(fabulous art by: This Illustrated Life)

To be more accurate, this journal is half-locked. Fanfiction and fandom posts will still be unlocked, so if you're only here for my fics, feel free to friend me anonymously like so many of you have. If you want in on the oh-so-exciting locked posts, drop me a line on this post, tell me why you want in (as in where you know me from) and I'll see what I can do. I'm not too picky, but I like to have some control over who reads what. I don't have friending notifications on, so if you add me I'm not likely to notice unless you point it out.
dw :: team tardis :: OMG YAY

2015 in review

I was meaning to post for a while about how, for once, actually, stuff is going pretty well for me and I am feeling sort of almost kinda well-adjusted. But I guess it is easier or more tempting to come and write a big angsty entry than to brag about everything coming up Milhouse, so I resisted. But yes, the short version is that the Canadian election happened, everything turned out better than I expected, and my upswing in relief and happiness from that eventually translated into a broader sense of well-being. I don't think the election is the sole factor, but it was a huge moment for me as the first time in my adult life I've had any reason to be remotely proud of Canada outside of hockey games. I'm working federally again too and the shift in environment at work is really interesting to witness. It's a slow transition I think for certain upper-management types to adjust to the marching orders of a new, very different government, but the changes are good. It remains pleasantly baffling to have a prime minister whom I not only don't want to strangle but actively like -- who even knew that was possible. I could honestly talk about this for days, but suffice to say I'm incredibly grateful to see Canada heading in a new direction for 2016.

Anyway, the new era of political optimism in Canada ushered in with it an era of general optimism for me. I like my job, and I'm going to be working full-time in 2016 (although it's still a one-year contract, so... watch out for the return of the depressed posts in 2017). I got assigned the National Inquiry into Missing and Murdered Indigenous Women file at work, which was hugely thrilling to me both because it's a big step professionally but also because it's a cause I find politically and personally very meaningful. I still miss the friends who have moved away, but working has allowed me to make some new friends. I've had two weeks off for Christmas between contracts, and while the first week off was quite nice, I found myself backsliding a bit during this second week which makes me confront the reality that I like the routine and the sense of purpose.

Probably the least-satisfied part of my life rn is the fandom side, because I've been sort of fandom homeless for a while now, with my interest in Doctor Who finally waning in the face of years of Extreme and Endless Moffating, and nothing stepping up to fill the void. Granted, if I had to pick between personal and career satisfaction vs fandom satisfaction, I'd pick the former, but it'd still be nice to be really excited about something again. Ah well. Maybe soon.

In short, while the beginning of 2015 was very rough, the end of 2015 was among the happiest I'd been in ...frankly, quite a few years. I hope 2016 continues on in the same vein.

I filled out both the obligatory end of year memes on Tumblr and I'll post them here as well, for posterity!


2. Your favorite film this year: Well favourite movie overall was probably Inside Out but The Force Awakens has provided me like… four whole days of fandom entertainment…

3. Your favorite book this year: Serving the Prime Minister

4. Your favorite album or song this year: Adele’s 25 or the Hamilton OCR (ugh)

5. Your favorite TV show this year: JESSICA JONESSSS

6. Your favorite LJ community Tumblr this year: Uhhhhh this is hard because of the aforementioned fandom homelessness, and also Tumblr becoming an echo chamber.

7. Your best new fandom discovery of the year: Jessica Jones! Alias is the first comic series I’ve ever read in its entirety and the TV show was everything I wanted and more.

8. Your biggest fandom disappointment of the year: I’m not sure if I can count Doctor Who because I expect nothing and I’m still let down. I guess I’m disappointed that I don’t care more about DW? I was vaguely disappointed that the HP play is about Albus Severus and the Mid-Life Crisis because that’s not what I would’ve chosen.

9. Your TV boyfriend of the year: Matt Murdock!

10. Your TV girlfriend of the year: JESSICA JONESSS

11. Your biggest squee moment of the year: Like everything about Jessica Jones happening. I was super pumped about the Broadchurch s3 announcement as well, can’t wait to watch it in 2020. Also getting tickets to Albus Severus and The Mid-Life Crisis was exciting too.

12. Your most missed old fandom: I miss loving Doctor Who but it has been a long time. RIP.

13. Your fandom you haven’t tried yet, but want to? Not really. I MEAN I need a new fandom home but IDFK what it will be, I am picky and elusive.

14. Your biggest anticipation of the New Year: In some ways (trip!! friends! new HP canon???) Albus Severus and the Mid-Life Crisis. Other than that I’m… not sure? I’m excited for Broadchurch s3 but lmao that might not be until 2017 because Britain is ridiculous, and likewise who tf knows when Defenders will exist, etc. The Luke Cage show maybe? SENSE8 SEASON 2? TEN/DONNA BIG FINISH AUDIOS?

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Happy new year to anyone who's still out there. I hope 2016 is good to us all.
eng :: a star danced

2 harry potter fics (!!): where the air is rarefied (lily/james), culture shock (lily, gen)

It feels somehow disloyal to not post these here, so, here's the two Harry Potter fics I've written so far in the year of our lord 2015

Title: Where the Air is Rarefied
Characters: Lily/James
Rating: PG
Length: 7k
Genre: Pretty much solid fluff. Who am I.
Excerpt: If pressed, later, she’d say it was exhaustion that caused her to forget who she was talking to, and it was that same exhaustion which prevented her from foreseeing the inevitable fall-out of telling James Potter, “Ugh, no thanks, I hate flying.”

Lily Evans knew she’d made a mistake as soon as the words were out of her mouth.


Title: Culture Shock (part 1 of 2)
Characters: Lily Evans, with some guest appearances from Severus Snape, James Potter, Mary MacDonald and some others
Rating: PG
Length: 2.5k
Genre: Character study
Excerpt: She first hears the word “Mudblood” bellowed at top volume out of a red envelope she will later learn is called a Howler.
Summary: Five times Lily Evans hated being Muggle-born.

The first summer after Hogwarts, Lily is so excited she can hardly stand it.
dw :: ten :: aloha

time for my bi-annual lj check-in, I guess

Everything else in my internet life is in a major throwback mode rn (I'll get to that in a minute), so I suppose it is only natural to also feel like visiting the ghost town that is livejournal. I do miss you, lj! Tumblr is the least social social media platform I have ever seen. I don't understand why fandom migrated to a website that doesn't even have a competent private messaging system. I want to take this up with the Council of Elders.

Anyway, I know it's been eons since I updated and I'm sure all 3 of you are on pins and needles, so my last year-ish in review:

Real life:
1. I think probably my most recent entries were whining about how everyone was moving away. So, that happened. It sucks. More and more the universe seems to be suggesting I move to Toronto, which is not actually something I really want to do, but not doing it increasingly feels like Macbeth trying to ignore prophecy, so, I don't know. Pretty much all my closest friends have wound up there, or are planning to wind up there in the next year or so.

2. I changed jobs. I started looking in January/Februaryish, interviewed for a position I really really wanted, did not get it, and the morning I got the rejection email and had big plans like "cry a lot", a friend from university texted me to tell me about a position in her department. I'm on casual contract, working 3 (soon to be 4) days a week, no benefits, and it's only a short-term contract for a short-term project (aimed to be finished by December 2016, though I'll likely be done before then), so it's not really The Dream, but it is a significant pay increase not to mention significant stability increase (for the time being), I like the work well enough (I'm a web writer), and I like my team. I wish it had a sense of permanence to it, because gosh golly would it be nice to be able to plan any fucking thing in my life ever more than 6 months in advance, but, y'know. ~Millennials~. In the meantime though I can't complain too much. Check back this time next year when my contract has expired.

3. Somewhat related since I'm working federally again, Canadian politics is a hot ass mess right now. I'm not sure which party I will vote for in October, but I sure know which party I won't be voting for. Contemplating a world where Harper wins yet another election is truly terrifying, and it is utterly baffling to me that this is even a remote possibility. If there is a God, the CPC will be decimated this election the way the Liberals were last election.

4. I started playing floor hockey. Sports??? Me??? Really? It is fun, although I am not very good. Most of my team is not very good either, so it works out, lmao.

Internet life:
1. Doctor Who starts on Saturday and I have never been less interested, womp womp. I think I would have been more interested if we had a new companion, but as much as I once liked Clara, 3 years of her is too much, especially after s8 gave her, like, four different wonderful exit points. It will be truly remarkable and sort of sad if what finally drives me away from DW fandom is not anything dramatically enraging like the 50th or River Song's life, but rather the sheer mediocrity of 5 years of Moffat with no end in sight, but here we are. Not with a bang but a whimper, and all.

2. The result of #1 is that I have been sort of fandom homeless for a while. I don't like being fandom homeless, because fictional escapism is my fave coping mechanism, so it's a restless feeling. I did briefly foray into Broadchurch fandom when s2 was airing -- I even wrote some fic (???!!) -- but a show that airs every other year with 8 episodes isn't very sustainable, fandom-wise. Can't w8 for s3 to come out in five billion years.

3. I've watched and enjoyed a few TV shows this year, although none in a "give me all the fic you have" way: Orphan Black continues to be one of my fave shows ever. Sense8 was wonderful, probably my favourite new show of 2015 so far, and I'm super relieved it got renewed. I watched Don't Trust the Bitch in Apartment 23 five years later and it was hysterical, R I P. I've got one episode left to watch of Humans, which is also great scifi. Daredevil I was shockingly into, as someone who wanted essentially nothing to do with Daredevil up until the point I watched it and developed a massive crush on Matt Murdock.

4. I'm also mega hyped for Jessica Jones, which at this point reads like a laundry list of my fave things, including but not limited to a female lead, a female superhero (!!!), a dark-n-gritty female superhero lead with PTSD who insists she isn't a hero but keeps doing heroic things anyway, a psychological thriller, Claire Temple, Krysten Ritter, and David Tennant. I bought the Alias omnibus about a month ago with a gift certificate, making it the first comic series I've ever read, and it was awesome. I can't wait. Jessica Jones is such a good character. The cast is gonna kill it. Eventually I'm gonna get to see love of my life Jessica Jones interact with love of my life Matt Murdock. Praise be to Netflix.

5. Aside from the Jessica Jones anticipation though, I started rereading Harry Potter, and I have completely relapsed into Harry Potter. Spoiler alert: I fuckin love Harry Potter. I had thought, when I started rereading -- since this is the first time I've read any of the books in about 5 years -- that perhaps my tastes would have changed and I'd find myself feeling differently about things and characters etc. Wrong!!!! My taste has always been amazing, Lily/James otp 4ever, etc. I'm 12 pages into a new Lily/James fic, in the year of our lord 2015. I will probably write more fic after I finish this one. What a time to be alive. I finished Prisoner of Azkaban (my faaaave) a few weeks ago and have been waiting to start GOF after I finish this fic. The most disturbing part about rereading is how old I now realize I am in comparison to these children. Harry & co are tiny babies! Lily and James get married, have babies and die before they are as old as I am! I'm older than the Cool Adults like Bill and Tonks! I'm so old my teacher crush on Remus Lupin is now just a regular crush! But anyway, it's been fun, I love Harry Potter, I wanna go see this mysterious play next summer, etc.

6. This was the summer of cons for me, since after seeing David Tennant and Billie Piper at Wizard World Philadelphia I ended up going to Montreal CC with goldy_dollar, shinyopals and lacunaz, where we saw Billie Piper, Karen Gillan, Caitlin Blackwood and Eve Myles. It was pretty cool -- I got to ask Eve Myles a question about Broadchurch, got a photo with Karen who is a doll, and we got an amazing group shot with Billie lmao. It was fun! Only Freema Agyeman remains on my gotta-catch-em-all Doctor Who cast list.
dw :: ten/rose :: worst day of my life

the season finale many years in the making

I don't post much on LJ anymore but some moments feel like they ought to be memorialized here, since they sort of started~ here. Like this one:

goldy_dollar and I went to the Wizard World Philadelphia con to see David Tennant and Billie Piper, which was completely surreal. That part is all a bit of a blur tbh -- for one brief moment in time David Tennant and I were touching each other which is truly the important thing lmao.

Adding to the surreality was that joining us to the con was bazat89 -- FINALLY after all this time I have seen Liz in the flesh! It was awesome and generally too brief. bluetooth16 was there too! I've met a lot of internet friends over the years but the combo of Liz + Amanda + David + Billie was something else.

I ALSO got stopped by someone named Claire who said she had read my LJ and my fic, which was awesome -- hi Claire!!!
dw :: ten :: i can see that

2014 end-of-year meme

I've done the same end of year meme every year since like 2010 or so, and yet when I went to find it I had to go back to 2011 because I guess I did it on Tumblr in recent years and Tumblr makes it impossible to find anything ever. So for posterity, here's my 2014 meme.

1. What did you do in 2014 that you’d never done before?
Ummm. Got my full license? Swam in the Mediterranean? OH! Ran 6k :)

2. Did you keep your New Year’s resolutions, and will you make more for the next year?
I don’t do resolutions, that way leads disappointment.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
Nope. I don’t know anyone even in the vicinity of being pregnant, actually.

4. Did anyone close to you die?
No, thankfully.

5. What countries did you visit?
England and France were the big’uns although I was also in the US briefly a couple times.

6. What would you like to have in 2015 that you lacked in 2014?
Don’t even get me started, meme. A real job. Direction. Certainty. Confidence.
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Otherwise not much is new with me. I don't post here because it's a ghost town and also because if I did it would be the same fucking post I've been making for three fucking years about how I have no purpose in life and blah blah blah quarterlife depression. At least on Tumblr I can break that up with a lot of pictures of David Tennant.

collab fic: Out of the Howling, parts 11 and 12

So, uh, this has been done for ages, but I may have forgotten to post the link here. (Tbf, it was mainly that I doubted anyone was reading this exclusively through me on LJ without also following goldy_dollar, or reading on Teaspoon/Tumblr/Ao3... but anyway.)

Title: Out of the Howling (part 11/12)
Authors: goldy_dollar & _thirty2flavors
Rating: PG-13
Characters/Pairings: Ten II/Rose
Genre: Angst, drama
Summary: Six years after Bad Wolf Bay, Rose gets a message from another universe.
Excerpt: “No. We are not using this — this self-sacrifice reunion afterglow to sweep this under the rug, we are not. It’s not fair.”

Previous parts: Part 1; Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6 , Part 7, Part 8, Part 9, Part 10,

Hyde Park buzzed with Torchwood personnel when they arrived.

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Out of the Howling, part 10 of 12

Title: Out of the Howling (part 10/12)
Authors: goldy_dollar & _thirty2flavors
Rating: PG-13
Characters/Pairings: Ten II/Rose
Genre: Angst, drama
Summary: Six years after Bad Wolf Bay, Rose gets a message from another universe.
Excerpt: “Oh, don’t flatter yourself. I don’t want this. I don’t want you.” Everything was stirred up now — his anger with the Master, with himself, his grief at having Rose ripped away from him — and it shook in his voice, low and angry. “You know, I was actually happy? Really, properly happy. For once. And you took that away.”

Previous parts: Part 1; Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6 , Part 7, Part 8, Part 9

At first, Rose didn’t move.