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Long time no post [06 Dec 2009|09:53pm]
Hey how's it goin? I always forget about my livejournal for like months at a time. Might start posting here again. Maybe.

3 kissed it ...you know you want to

The DBH 10k [01 Aug 2009|05:07pm]
So I'm in this huge $10,000 t-shirt design contest, it would mean a lot to me if you took a minute to lend me a vote.

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...you know you want to

Aw [01 May 2009|10:20pm]
baby brother: Your the best brother ever (hug)
me: nah, I'm not.
baby brother: Yes you are, cause you always nice to me.
me: okay (smile)

That kid warms my heart every day.

...you know you want to

Like pulling teeth [28 Apr 2009|02:07am]
Went to the dentist today. The receptionist there today was gorgeous as hell. What do you say to a receptionist at the dentist's office? I don't know if I could pull that one off. "Uh huh, I'm here to have a broken infected tooth pull out of my mouth... you're pretty, maybe we should hang out some time." Hopeless.

...you know you want to

Before I go to bed [22 Apr 2009|12:20am]
Sorry I don't get around to reading/commenting you guys journals. Seems self-centered or something doesn't it? It's not that though, it's just that I usually come on this site like super late before I'm about to pass out, and for some reason the font on the Friends journal page is super tiny. So I start reading and I'm like "Ah fuck, I should just go to sleep." It's hard to focus when you're half asleep.

I haven't eaten sugar in weeks. Toothaches. Terrible terrible unbelievable toothaches. Anybody deal with them and know good remedies? My mom said clove oil but I couldn't find it anywhere. I bought some stuff called Anbesol and that shit didn't do anything but make me slobber profusely. So all I've been doing is taking shitloads of pain relievers whenever I feel it coming. Works well enough if I do it before it's already gotten bad. I haven't really experienced that many painful things in life. Never broken anything or had any serious injuries. These toothaches qualify as the most painful thing I've ever experienced hands down. It's excruciating. I've almost cried a few time. It's scared me enough to keep me away from sugar, which I love. Water is the only beverage I can drink. I'll be going to the dentist Monday and he'll do some work on my mouth, he's going to pull some teeth... hopefully it won't be THAT unpleasant. When the toothaches are gone I'll be happy to have a soda again... but only once in a while, because I need to start taking proper care of myself (something I never thought I'd care to do, haha).

Anyway... nothin else.

...you know you want to

More work semi-wierdness [18 Apr 2009|08:19pm]
So there's a new girl at work, and she's pretty cute. I'm pretty sure she's kinda been checking me out, so I was thinking yeah I'm going to try to make this happen, haha, I might be delusional about her frequent glances, but it's worth a shot right? Then I noticed that her stomach looked sorta big, but I thought maybe that's just an optical illusion from the type of shirt she was wearing, you know... one of those deals where it's kinda at the bottom? Like a dress that doesn't go past your waist or something. But then I overheard co-workers asking her if she had names picked out, and giving her nicknames like "Baby mama" and "lil mama" and "mommy". So it turns out she's 4 months pregnant. Damn. Well, maybe she's a single mother? Nope, overheard her talking about her boyfriend. Double damn.

So she's taken and has a baby on the way. Oh well, other fish right? I still get that vibe though, like she's attracted to me. Pregnant ladies still get attracted right? Aren't they all hormonal or something? Haha. I'm sure just seeing me has made her regret how her life has turned out ;) I'm totally kidding.

...you know you want to

Sorry, I don't want to be your son-in-law, but thanks! [18 Apr 2009|01:27am]
The other day at work I was sitting next to a co-worker Miriam, she's a nice older lady. Everybody at work loves me, especially the old women, haha, I don't know why but I have that affect on women. Maybe it's because I have that "fine young man" quality. I don't smoke, I don't drink, I don't curse around my elders, I'm polite, hold open doors, pick up stuff they drop, help them move heavy things, I don't dress thuggishly, I use proper grammar, I share, I say hello with a smile every time I see them, and of course the coup de grace; just about everybody at work knows I take care of my little brother. As far as they're concerned I'm a saint, haha.

So anyway, as I was saying, I was sitting next to Miriam, and she says "Jeff, how old are you?" and I say "I'm 24." and she says "Oh, okay. You have a girlfriend?" it's a typical old lady question, they like hearing about that kind of stuff I guess. I say "Nah." and she just says "Oh." then a few seconds later she pulls out a wallet photo and hands it to me. "This is my daughter." she says. The girl in the photo, I'm not going to say she was ugly by any stretch, but not exactly pretty, ya know? Someone I wouldn't look twice at. Plus... she was a little too... big, for my taste. I'm like "Oh... okay." Me being not the sharpest tool in the shed, I don't see where this is going. Miriam is just looking at me, studying my reaction I guess. I don't know how I'm supposed to react to a picture of someone's grown kid, but I try my best impression of a person approving of something. I just nod my head and make that odd little "not bad" expression that we all do. I hand the picture back, and Miriam says "She's 26." and I'm like "Oh, yeah?" and then Miriam says "She doesn't have a boyfriend." and I'm like "....Oh." It finally dawns on me that she's just not making conversation by showing off her daughter, she's trying to play matchmaker. I suddenly feel extremely dreadfully awkward. Miriam says "Could I introduce you?" I sort of nonchalantly mumble "I wouldn't mind." too mumbly apparently because Miriam says "Huh?" and I say "Sure", shrugging my shoulders. I really want to say no thanks, but I'm not cold hearted that I can reject someone through their mother. I couldn't think of a good excuse since I already volunteered that I was single, and it wasn't like she said a date or something, so I couldn't exactly make up some lie about being busy. So I just went along with it, I didn't know what else to do.

This was like last week. I haven't been introduced yet, and honestly I'm hoping she's forgotten. I hope her daughter like gets engaged or something soon. I don't want to meet her. That shit would be extremely weird to me. I'm not attracted to her, I don't know her, her mother is expecting us to hit it off... just too awkward for me, I'm already somewhat timid around girls as is. I don't like when people try to set people up. It's just awkward for the two victims usually. Getting set up by someone's parent is double awkward, because come on... your mom isn't going to set you up with someone because she wants you guys to have a fling or get you some tail or something. A mother wants to find you love, a husband, someone to provide for you, have kids with you, etc etc. Fuck that shit, that's way too much pressure on a first meeting.

I've told some friends about this and they said I should've said I was gay to get out of it, haha. No thanks. Nothing against gays at all, but I'm not about to start a rumor at my place of employment that I'm gay. For one, there are a few cute girls there, and they're always hiring new people, so I don't want people thinking I'm gay. For two, and this is very important, there are actual gay guys at my work. They're openly gay, and they're pretty cool dudes, but... I don't know if I want them to think I'm gay too... might cause some awkward situations.

What I plan to do is that if Miriam brings it up again I'll just say I met someone. *sigh* Why must old ladies think I'm so perfect that they want me to marry their daughters? TIS MY CURSE!!!

1 kissed it ...you know you want to

APEDOG Shirt. Vote for me? If you want. [16 Mar 2009|03:41am]
What's up LJ? I only post here once in a blue moon.

So I entered this t-shirt design contest at http://designbyhumans.com.

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I wasn't expecting much, but I'm doing really good so far, it's looking like I can win!

If I win my shirt will be printed and I'll get $500 cash, and then if it goes on to win shirt of the week I could get $1000. If I win shirt of the month that's $1750. After you sell a certain amount you get residuals (paid a percentage for every shirt sold). So, winning this would mean a LOT to me. It would definitely help me take care of this lil guy:

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us

You have to sign up to vote, but it's just name, password, e-mail, location, birthdate. Takes a whole minute.

Then, if you love me...

Also, I decided to get a twitter, so if you have one, or you just want to stay up to date with what's going on with me: http://twitter.com/kissmyaesthetic

Talk to you guys soon.

1 kissed it ...you know you want to

Sup? [06 Feb 2009|04:14am]
Not much here. Work fucking sucks, it starting to be like an endurance game, I feel like I'm just there trying to get through it. My supervisor keeps harassing me about working a late shift. I've told her that I HAVE to leave at 4pm, I pick up my little brother from daycare at 5:30. There's nobody else that can pick him up or watch him, there's no way around it, I have to be there for him. But she's fucking persistent, "You have to, I'm asking you to do just one late day, most of the other people do at least two, blah blah blah." and I'm like "I can't" and she's like "Well I understand your situation, but blah blah blah." well apparently she DOESN'T understand because she won't fucking stop pestering me about it. They need to either fire me for not being able to do the hours they want, or leave me the fuck alone, not pester me about it every fucking day, that shit is irritating. There are lots of other little (and big) annoyances at work, but I won't get into it, I'd be here all day.

Anyway, I've been busy in a good way lately. Working on creative stuff. Art, animation, writing, etc. He's something I'm working on at the moment...

Only 7 seconds, and the sound is very shitty, but I like how it's coming out. I literally haven't animated anything in years.

I have a comic in the works, kinda. I'm writing it, my friend Jorge is going to draw it. Shitty part though is that Jorge moved, so he's too far to see in person anymore, which sucks not just for this project, but because he's my best friend and my social life pretty much revolved around him. I've spent my weekends alone since he left. I should probably hang with the other fellas though, because I love them too. Jorge and I are continuing with the comic though, I e-mail him the writing, he's going to e-mail me the layouts he comes up with, I'll ok what I like, he'll do the cleaned up version, send it to me, I'll color, then we're finished... we'll figure something out.

I should go to sleep now. Get some rest. I'm going to take work off tomorrow, call in sick, cause fuck work. It's rainy, it's 4am so I know I'm going to be too tired to get up and drag my ass to work and be productive, plus my shoes get all soggy in the rain so I wouldn't look forward to that, and besides all that it would be nice to have a day to just work on my projects (and watch porn).

...you know you want to

You know what I like? Sluts. [25 Dec 2008|11:35pm]
Every time I sign on to myspace I see a "new message" thing, and I'm like "Yay, someone wants to talk to me!" then I check and it's some fake slut profile, and I'm like "Booo!" I mean.... why can't any REAL sluts message me sometimes? Come on sluts! You... you're slutty. Me... I love sluts. We're PERFECT for each other! You know it's true.

So, I changed my privacy settings. That should take care of the fake slut problem. However, it doesn't take care of the REAL slut problem, or the lack thereof. I've been doing a lot of thinking lately, because I'm an introspective guy like that. What's that? What does introspective mean? Well it means that I'm prone to inward speculation. Huh? What does speculation mean? Fuck, do you know ANY words? Get a dictionary or some shit. Anyway, I've been thinking lately that something's missing in my life. Sluts. I've been trying to figure out how to remedy this problem and I got this awesome idea from a music video. Well.. it wasn't "A" music video, just music videos in general. Every time you see a rap video there's like some awesome party populated with bikini clad sluts, and they're in hot tubs and on stripper poles and doing impressive things with their posterior region. What I noticed is that they're not just hanging on the star of the video, but also his random friends. Obviously the rapper's entourage get the attention of these sluts not because of their own merits, but because of the slut attracting ability of their rapstar friend. Sluts by association. So, my plan is... instead of trying to attract sluts with my own looks and charm (I'm not exceptional in either category) or with money (uhhh... I don't have much of that stuff) I can just hitch a ride on someone else's slutwagon! I wouldn't really have to do anything except be this dude's friend, right? Just hang out with him, accompany him to events where there will be ample sluts, and BAM I'm in there like swimwear! I'm such a fucking genius.

The only thing is, I don't really know any rappers or celebrities, so I'd have to find such a dude. Shouldn't be that hard though right? Would any of you guys happen to be a slut magnet? If so, I'd like to be your friend! Now you might be asking yourself "What's in it for me? I'm an awesome slut magnet, I don't need you tagging along."

Well, let me run down some of my awesome friend qualities:

- I don't drink. So that means I'm always available as a designated driver. Plus it's always good to have a sober friend around to make sure you don't do something too crazy like accidentally kill a hooker or make out with a guy.

- I'm a funny dude. I can keep the jokes comin all night long, and as an added bonus I'll let you use some of my jokes so you can appear to be funny as well.

- I'm very passive. You don't have to worry about me getting us in a bar fight or flipping out and stabbing someone. I keep my cool at all times. Unless you WANT me to stab someone... I can make that happen.

- I'm a good listener. Hey, if you want to talk about your problems, I'm good for that, and I can also give you advice. I'm a very wise dude.

- I can keep a secret. After you've confided in me like I've mentioned above, it's between me and you. Maybe you were drunk and said something a little iffy. Don't worry about it, dude, I'll take it to my grave.

- I'm low maintenance. You don't have to worry about me freeloading too much. I don't eat that much. I don't drink at all. I'm not going to ask you to let me borrow some money or anything like that. I'm in it for the sluts, that's all I care about.

- I'm a good talker. If we ever get in a jam, I'm the guy to talk us out of it. I'm smart as shit if you haven't noticed.

I could go on and on about my good friend qualities, but basically what you need to know is that I'm a cool dude who's not going to creep any girls out or do anything weird and I'm a nice guy who's dependable and will have your back. I'd be a real asset to your team. ALL I want in return is a slut or two when we're out at some slutty get-together.

That's not too much to ask is it?

Well, get back to me, let me know what you think.

1 kissed it ...you know you want to

Ipod stolen [16 Dec 2008|05:22am]
Yesterday I was waiting at the bus stop, enjoying some music I'd just put on my ipod, in a REALLY good mood. Then 2 gangbangers walked up to me. One asked me where I was from. I said I don't bang. He asked if my people bang, I said no. He asked where I lived, I said around the corner. He said "Around the corner where?". I just shrugged. He asked what I was listening to. I said rock music. He asked what I was listening to again, I repeated myself, he asked to see what was in my pocket. I said I didn't have anything... I had 45 bucks in my pocket though, that my mom gave me to go get my baby brother some new shoes, pair of pants, and a shirt. He kept asking me what was in my pocket and I kept saying nothing. He asked to see my ipod, and I kinda just showed it to him, and he was like nigga give it here, and I said no. He grabbed it, and I had my hand still on it. We had a little tug of war with my ipod. You don't understand, I love my ipod, that's all I do when I'm out of the house is listen to it. I wasn't going to give it up without a fight. The guy was like "You gonna make this hard." and one hand went down to his sweat pants. I was like "Do you have a weapon?" and he was like "WHAT NIGGA!" I still had my hand on my ipod though, and he said to his friend "He wants to make this hard." and the friend stepped toward me. Really fucking begrudgingly I let go of the ipod. They left. I felt helpless, and angry, and ashamed that I didn't fight. Eventhough he reached for his pants, I don't think he really had any kind of weapon, but I wasn't willing to risk it. Besides, there were two of them, and I was sitting, there's no way I could've gotten the upper hand in a fight. But still, I felt like I should've/could've done something. I take care of a 5 year old though, and it's made me a thousand times more cautious with my life and my choices. Getting killed is scary in and of itself, I love living, but the thought of my baby brother losing me is so much scarier. I know how much he depends on me, and loves me, and... it tears me up to try to think of what he'd be going through to lose me. So I don't really want to gamble with my life. I still feel like a coward though. I don't know if a woman can understand what it feels like a man to feel like a coward.

After it happened I didn't know what to do. I had been on my way to my friend's house, and I didn't know if I should still go, or if I should call the police, or go home, or what. I texted my brother who was still home and told him what happened. My initial thinking was that me and my brothers could find the two guys, kick their asses, get my ipod back, and feel victorious. But then I decided against that plan, not wanting to put myself and my brother in danger just over an ipod and broken pride. I decided to just get on the bus and go to my friend's house as planned, enjoy the rest of my weekend instead stewing over what happened. When I was on the bus my brother called, he asked where I was, if I was ok, told me to come back home, asked what they looked like. He said he was outside with a baseball bat and was going to crack their skulls open. I told him to go back home and forget about it, don't worry about it. He said ok, but it didn't sound convincing. Again, I didn't know what to do. Should I get off the bus go home and make sure my brother didn't do anything stupid... or go on the search with him. Should I just stay on the bus and not worry about it. I called again, pleaded with him to stay home because I didn't want anything happening to him, I think he could hear it in my voice how much I was worried about him, so he said ok and I believed him. I asked him to not tell our mom.

So, I went to my friend's house. Had a good time. Didn't think at all about what had happened.

Now that I'm back home though, I'm still pissed about it. I want revenge. I want to beat their heads against the pavement. I fucking hate people like that. It's not even about the ipod, it's just... I can't fucking stand people who can't be DECENT human beings. I could never in a million years justify threatening and stealing from some stranger, I don't understand how someone could feel that's okay to do. I feel like I want to be fucking Batman or something, but I don't have the money and skills to do anything like that.

I used to feel safe in this neighborhood, nobody's ever messed with me around here before, or even looked at me the wrong way. But now I feel like I've just been lucky all this time. When I go to work tomorrow I know I'm probably going to be a little on edge. And I won't be able to listen to music either, that's going to feel bad. I'm so used to it. Even after they'd stolen my ipod, I kept reaching down for it on reflex. I can get a new one though. Might be a couple weeks til I can save up for one, but whatever.

I can't wait to make some real money and get the fuck out of Inglewood. Far away from piece of shit people like those guys.

4 kissed it ...you know you want to

Today [19 Jul 2008|04:10am]
Had a pretty good day. When I picked up Darren from school his teacher was telling me how proud she was of him because he's been doing really well with his school work, he's writing really well and doing some addition. I'm so proud of him. Like a week ago I gave him a talk about how it's important to do well in school, so to see him doing well and being praised makes me feel like I'm doing a good job with him and he really listens to me. I'll have to reward him soon.

He also had a really good report card weeks ago. In the teachers personal comments she said he was sweet, a joy to be around, and well-behaved. He's such a good kid, taking care of a kid could be a lot harder, but he makes it really easy.

Later on at night I went to see The Dark Knight with 2 friends. Daaaammmmn that movie was good. I could sit here and write pages about how awesome it was. Fucking Heath Ledger though man. I was like... the only person I know of who was excited when I heard he was playing The Joker. This movie illustrates why Ledger's death was so tragic, he was an extremely talented dude who was barely starting to show people what he could do. Seriously, if watched the Dark Knight and nobody told you Heath Ledger played the Joker, you'd NEVER know... not just because of all the makeup, but because his voice, his body language, everything, just seemed so different. Genius performance.

2 thumbs up.

I hope comic book movies and action blockbusters to come follow it's example.
...you know you want to

*sigh* [18 Jul 2008|01:22am]
I feel like I have no fucking control of my life. I'm trapped and there isn't shit I can't do about it. I'm not in a position to change anything. There's nowhere I can go. No one who can help me. I'm just fucked. I'm fine as long as I don't think about it, and most days it's easy to not think about it because most days are fine enough to enjoy. But the problems always resurface, on a weekly basis, and I'm at my breaking point. My baby brother is the only thing that keeps me going. If he's happy on a day to day basis I can manage, and luckily he is. That's my biggest concern in the world, that that kid is happy and fulfilled and can grow into a functioning adult that is a genuinely good person. But shit man, besides being with him or friends, I'm just fucking plain old unhappy. I don't know what to do about it. I know I'm being all vague about it, but I'm not really looking for advice, I just want to vent. It's family stuff, really personal.

I'm just really tired of waiting for things to get better. It starts to feel that I'm waiting in vain. There's just always going to be some huge fucking obstacle (usually lack of money) standing in the way.

2 kissed it ...you know you want to

[07 Jun 2008|02:08am]
I got a really cool review of 2 of my songs today:

"Anything Everything": That is really quite the journey, isn't it?... like a rollercoaster ride through a circuit board.  I respect artists like you who push the concept of music to the edges.  In this case, it is the symphony of electrical technology.  I did not expect movements in this song, but the work has suddenly become softer and calmer as I'm listening to it--with wind that make you feel like your soaring over a desert.  Then comes the third movement which is similar to the first but has a more apprehensive feel, like there is trouble in the works.  This apprehension continues to build and you wonder what has happened.  But in an instrumental, you need to come up with the ideas yourself.  Because of the three distinct sections of this work, you should really consider it a three movement piece.

"Toothless": There is a distinct feeling of being alone in this song.  With it, a hopeless feeling with danger looming all around.  It would certainly make a great ambience for a suspenceful scene in a movie.  You actually feel the tension rise throughout the work.  By the time the drums take solo, it feels as if the impending doom is only seconds away.  And then... too late.

I enjoyed listening.  Thanks for making your music available.

Timothy S. Klugh
Grove City, Ohio, USA
<a href="http://www.msplinks.com/MDFodHRwOi8vd3d3LlRpbW90aHlTS2x1Z2guY29t">www. TimothySKlugh. com</a>

I was really flattered that someone took the time to say all that about my songs, and it's good to know that someone hears my songs the way I intend them, as a narrative of moods that is open to interpretation.

...you know you want to

Boo-Urns! [05 Jun 2008|03:43am]
Man... my life is kinda lame right now. I don't have any time or money.

I hate to admit it, but I'm really lonely nowadays. Haven't been involved with anyone in a long while, haven't really had time to be, it's been too inconvienient. I see girl's I could talk to all the time, but I don't, because it would be pointless since I'd have no time for them anyway. I have a crush on that girl from work, but I'll be leaving that job and that area as soon as I can find a new job, so what would even be the point? Bah.

My life is like that in general, I'm not in a position to do any of the things I want to do. Ever

Anyway. It was my birthday on the 1st. It was a pretty much a normal weekend. No, actually it wasn't even as good as a normal weekend. On the weekends I normally go to the movies with all the fellas and have a lot of fun. On my birthday everybody was broke, it was just Jorge, Horacio, and I, we didn't see a movie, we just sat at their pad and watched Spectular Spider-Man episodes, then we went to the bookstore, I read half of Scott Pilgrim book 3 there,  then we went to In&Out, and then they dropped me off at home. That was my birthday. It wasn't a bad time by any means, but every year my birthday is really fucking lackluster, it's annoying and depressing. I always have no money, everybody's busy, there's nothing to do. For once I want to have a really fun memorable birthday. I'd be happy with just a small get-to-gether with friends and some music and cake and rented movies or something. Next year if I can't afford to do something then I'm just going to ignore my birthday altogether.

I hope things will be better by year's end. There are too few possibilities in my life. I'm hindered at every step.

Bah, whatever.

Perhaps I'll have something more cheery to talk about tommorrow. I'm not in a good mood right now.

...you know you want to

Bored [23 May 2008|01:11am]
What's up? Me I've just been doin the routine. Also working on music a lot, having a lot of fun with that. I'm steadily getting adds on Myspace, so that's cool. I want to put out a release some time next year, maybe make a very limited release album, like a hundred copies, and see how it does.

Ah... I don't really have that much to say tonight.

...you know you want to

Maurice's Lady Problems [19 May 2008|01:04am]
Petre the rabbit: So, how's the new girlfriend?
Maurice the bush baby: Uh... *ahem* well, I think I kinda... HATE her.
Petre: Damn, already dude? You just started dating her like a week ago.
Maurice: Yeah, yeah it usually takes me like a good month or two to realize I hate a girlfriend, but like... the more I talk to this girl it's like... oh god, how did this happen to me? She's such a... dumb bitch.
Petre: Whoa whoa, the b word? Have some respect for women dude.
Maurice: What? Oh, no, c'mon, you know I don't mean it that way. She's not a bitch because she's a woman, she's a bitch because she's a bitch. Ya know?
Petre: Well, yeah, alright, proceed.
Maurice: Hm?
Petre: What's so dumb and bitchy about this dumb bitch?
Maurice: Ok, dumb part first, her favorite bands are Nickleback and Daughtry.
Petre: Daughtry?
Maurice: That American Idol "rocker".
Petre: *shrug*
Maurice: Well he's basically another boring Nickleback knockoff
Petre: Oh ok.
Maurice: I know music is subjective and all, but Nickleback? Everytime I look at her I'm thinking "Ew, this girl likes Nickleback." And it's not just like she thinks they're ok, she fucking loves them, she doles out money to go see them in concert, she buys front row tickets, she has a poster of them on her wall which by the way makes it really awkward when I'm trying to give her the business know what I mean?
Petre: Oh I know alright, this girl I dated once had a huge as Jesus poster on her wall.
Maurice: Haha, that's great. "Hey Lord, hope you don't mind me sinnin right in front of your eyes."
Petre: Exactly, I don't even believe in God, but it was kinda wierd. But anyway, so your girl has shitty taste in music, that's not so bad.
Maurice: Well, it's pretty bad to me, I don't have to agree with everything a girl listens to but I at least want to date someone who listens to something a little more... respectable. I can't respect Nickleback. But it's not just the music. She's just a vapid idiot. Her role models are Pamela Anderson and Paris Hilton.
Petre: The fuck?
Maurice: One of her favorite movies is GLITTER!
Petre: Glitter?
Maurice: That Mariah Carey movie.
Petre: Ohhhh, never seen it, but it looked like garbage.
Maurice: I unfortunately have it's worst then garbage... If garbage had garbage it would be Glitter.
Petre: Haha.
Maurice: She also talks massive shit about her alleged best friends behind their backs, and she's a totally stuck up snob. Uh, let's see, what else, oh yeah, she said books are stupid.
Petre: Damn dude
Maurice: And get this, she's a scientoligist.
Petre: Oh shit, really??
Maurice: Forreally real.
Petre: I've kinda always wanted to meet one of those... them.
Maurice: Well I'll bring her around some time.
Petre: What do you mean? Aren't you gonna break it off man?
Maurice: I wish. I can't. Not yet.
Petre: Why the fuck not? She sounds terrible.
Maurice: I know, but... well... I've only recently slept with her, and if I break up with her now, it's going to look like...
Petre: You just wanted to hit it and quit it?
Maurice: Exactly!
Petre: Well.. so what? She'll think you're a douche, but who cares what she thinks.
Maurice: But she'll go around telling people I "used" her, totally ruin my carefully constructed rep. I try to leave all my relationships on good terms, it's good for business.
Just like you don't want to get fired from your job, you want to leave amicably so you have good references for future employees.
Petre: I get ya. So... you're just going to keep dating her?
Maurice: Yeah, I guess, til I can find a way out of it that doesn't cast the wrong light on a brotha. I don't want it to look like I just wanted to sleep with her. Plus... I DO like sleeping with her, so there's also that.
Petre: No doubt. Hey... maybe you'll get lucky and she'll dump you or something."
Maurice: Yeah, I hope so... after I have sex with her a couple more times.
Petre: Well of course.
Maurice: Mmhm
Petre: Yyyyup.
Maurice: So that's how that's going.
Petre: Good luck Maurice, you crazy bastard you.
...you know you want to

Miz Er Ra Bull [14 May 2008|03:28am]
Man, I need to see a doctor. Being sick and hurt sucks when you're poor. Stupid Jeff, neglecting your health for so long.

...you know you want to

Entry Entry Entry [12 May 2008|12:03am]
Don't know what I'm about to talk about, just figured I'd post something just to get in the habit of posting.

Let's see... I just set this awesome high-res screen cap of Iron Man flying through the sky as my desktop. It looks so badass. I loved that movie so hard, Downey Jr is magic, and that suit was so damned sexy.

So I haven't talked to any girls in a long ass time, it's just hasn't been convienient to do so. Too much going on, and not really any time in my day to support that kind of thing. But once I find a new job and things seem like they're settling down I'm going to get out there and see what's up. I have to buy some new clothes first though. I haven't bought new clothes in a while, I don't feel good in my current clothes. I have a few cool shirts, but most of my jeans have been worn out, and not in a cool fashionable way, more in a I can use the scraps to clean up messes kind of way. My jacket is a really plain, slightly baggy, black hoodie. I really need some new jeans and a new jacket, and maybe new t-shirts if I have enough. I'd also like a new pair of shoes, a white canvas belt, and a new scarf while I'm at it, maybe a new hat. I know that girls are more attracted to status than they are looks, so if I look like nice that increases my chances, and if I feel like I look nice that increases my confidence, and when I'm feeling confident my charm is at it's highest, and girls notice confident guys, so yeah. I have to get new duds, asap.

I just typed a really long thing about my outlook on relationships, but I deleted it because everytime I get into that subject I feel like people might get the wrong impression or not really understand what I'm trying to say. The gist of it is I'm not really interested in love. The reason why is sorta complex yet simple. I never feel like I can explain it adequately though, so I'll just save that talk for a day that I can.

My eyes didn't really bother me at all today. If the blepharitis came and went that quick I'd be so fucking happy, but I doubt that's the case. It probably just didn't act up because I've been home all day in my room temperature apartment and I haven't rubbed my eyes at all. The cold air will probably make it act up tommorrow.

Oh, today I started writing a script for a short animation. The humor is kinda lowkey, I don't know if it'll work as well as I imagine it. I might need to make it funnier. The script is for something I've been thinking of for a long time called Loose Fur, which is about cartoon animals living really mundane down to earth lives. An adultish type comedy featuring cute furry animals. Maurice the bush baby is the main character, he's loosely based on myself, except he has more balls than I could ever muster. He shares an apartment with a sloth named Todd. They have a bunch of friends that include a Petre rabbit the lothario, a lamb I haven't named who has anger management problems and is kinda crazy, a frog character who is gay, but I might change him to another type of animal because my frog drawings are ugly, and some other supporting animal characters. I think it'll be funny, just gotta hammer out a decent script then do some storyboards, then I'll be ready to start animating it in a few months. I hope this doesn't end up as another one of my ideas I don't follow through with.

That's all for now. Big day tommorrow.


...you know you want to

Hey strangers [11 May 2008|03:50am]
It's hard for me to get into the habit of updating this thing. Sometimes I get the urge, but then I'm like "Nah... I'll do this instead." I guess it almost feels like a chore if I'm not in the right mood. Anyway, since it's been a while, here are some updates:

After a lot of emotional/mental/financial struggling I have my own apartment with my 19yr old brother Terrell and our 4yr old brother Darren is living with us.

We make enough to pay our rent, Darren goes to a nice private preschool not even a block from the apartment. The place is nice, it's starting to feel like home. I'm close to my friends now and can hang out regularly. I'm a lot happier. The only headache currently is that I'm still working my job near where I used to live, which is like a 3hour commute on the bus. I know, brutal. It's only temporary until I find a new job out here, which shouldn't (hopefully) be that hard. To be honest I'm going to be sad to leave my job, because I've really bonded with some of the kids there and I'll miss tutoring them. Also there's this really cute Asian chick (not the same one as before) that works there and is really friendly with me that I'd LOVE to get to know, but oh well, there are other girls out there.

Physically I'm doing pretty shitty. I have an ingrown toenail. That's been bothering me for a few weeks. At first I thought I'd just stubbed my toe and it would go away, so I didn't give it much thought, but it kept getting worse and I found out what it was. Haven't really had time to go get some help for it, so I just soak it, clean it, bandage it, loosen my shoe and go about my day. Even if I wanted to go to the doctor I don't have medical coverage. If that wasn't bad enough, just days ago my blepharitis resurfaced. Blepharitis is an iritation of the eyelid. Ever had an eyelash or a piece of dust or rock get stuck under your lid? That's what it feels like, half the day, and it makes you look like you've just been crying. It's fucking annoying. I had it once a couple years ago for a couple miserable weeks. I'm hoping it doesn't last that long this time. I guess I'm going to have to take a day off (I've already taken off like 3 already for other reasons this month) and go apply for medical. My paycheck will suffer, but my health is more important I guess. I can't work properly without my eyes and feet anyway.

What else? In good news, I've been working on the music a lot lately, and getting pretty good responses from people online. http://myspace.com/kissmyaesthetic all the songs are pretty new.
Also in music I'm developing a band with my friend Jorge (guitar) called Gallows vs Guillotine (I know you're jealous of that name).

As soon I can afford to get a new wacom I'm going to start working on some animations. Seriously. So stay tuned for that.

I hope I update this more often. If not, talk to you next time.

4 kissed it ...you know you want to

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