_sparkli_ was born a hedgehog at the start of the turbulent decade known as the Eighties. She subsequently escaped her quiet country life to raid the dustbins in Manchester (the true North and capital of the world). After four years of dunking bananas in liquid nitrogen, learning how many different ways a P can be written and increasing her caffeine intake tenfold, she found herself with a degree in astrophysics but no handy spaceship to stow away on. She plumped for a career as an actuary (like slightly morbid, insanely complicated maths) and thinks lawyers have got it too soft. She lives with her fluffball of a cat in a small English town that still thinks green wellies are a pretty good idea.