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(no subject)

well, right now..
life is... Hard to explain. Difficult.
I want to be happy, I want him to be happy, I want everyone to be happy,
but no matter what I do, someone gets hurt.

Josh and I broke up.
But The thing is.. I dont really care about that anymore.
I like a boy..
but this boy doesnt like me.

Its so hard to love someone, and know that you can never have them.

I gave josh my journal..
Ill be writing in here more often now.


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This is it.
Ive found it.

Well, my holiday had been..

I went away
before school ended

We went to lloydminster,
to drop off my grandma.
Then we went to prince albert
and visited for the night.
Then on Christmas eve we went to my Aunties house.
Then christmas day,
I FINALLY got a digital camera.
&&its awesome.
And we went to my aunties house
for christmas dinner.
Then we went to my grandmas house in lloyd
and had christmas dinner.

On boxing day I got together with some friends from lloyd.
That I hadnt seen in a LONG while.
We had a ton of fun, it was amazing.
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It was an awesome night.
But I missed josh so much.
We would text eachother every other minute.
But then his batteries ran out.

So, when I got back he took me out for dinner, and a movie.
He is the first boyfriend ever to do that for me.

Yah, I know what youre thinking..
But its true.

Hes by far the best guy I have ever dated.
I.. I.. I cant even attempt to describe what I feel about him
He is simply amazing.
I love him.
A lot.


fun fun fun

this week has been amazing
I kind of want to filll the whole thing wil how amazing I think josh is
but that would be too long
so, in short
he is the greatest boyfriend in the world
and I have never been so in love

Ive been super busy lately
today is my only free day
for a REALLY long time
Friday was a christmas party at robyns
which was awesome
and a sleepover
and then I went skating with jobies
and then I went to a christmas party for youth group
which was an all nighter
then on sunday I was prepping for monday
and cleaning
and cooking
and shopping
because I had a HUGE dinner party on monday
which was fun.

thats pretty much it




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Well, nothing too exciting happened today actually.
But yet it was.. I dont know.. perfect.
Nothing went wrong at all, and it was just like every other day
But yet it was so happy, and awesome.

I went to 3-on-3 basketball with my friends
Josh, Brianna, Tyler, and Chris
[they have one extra so they can tag out]
Anyways, and they got CREAMED
but no one cares, because everyone there is nice
and we dont really keep score.

And right now, school is F.U.N.
I know, its insane.
But all of my subjects we are doing something that I enjoy

Susan and I patched everything up again
and now were pretty close to how we used to be
Josh and I are better than ever
He is the greatest boy that I have ever known.
I love him, a lot, and I would talk about him for forever
but that would just make me look silly. Haha.
I got a really close friend to stop doing E,
which made me really proud of myself.
And everything with all of my friends is great.

Id say my life is pretty much perfect right now.


  • Current Mood
    loved loved


What an awesome week!


Well, hmm.. monday, nothing spectacular.
Tuesday I went to Sandras house
and we had coffee
and talked about our problems
and had an awesome time.

It was pretty sweet.

Then wednesday, I had to go to school
Like, I had to go in about an hour early
to go to tutorials
and finish my science final
because Im an idiot, and cant finish it in class.
And I had to finish all of my debate crap.
But on the bus I saw someone
and it was pretty freaking awkward
so Im glad I dont have to go in anymore.

Then that night I went to a demolay meeting
but I had to leave early because my mom came early
so I didnt even get tot alk to the boys!
Haha, I imagine Eric is mad.
oh well.

then, thursday..

I had to go in early again
to get together with jess to do debate crap
and I saw him again
and then someone yelled out
just as he got off the bus.
and it was pretty much the funniest thing ever.
We all had a good chuckle.
Cause apparently he keeps telling people that Im still after him.
which is kind of weird, but you know..
its all good.

then me and Josh went down to chinook
to go pick up Leigh ann and justin
Then we came back up and went to kensington
we got there a couple hours early, so we just hung out and waited
then sandra and anthony came down
we hung out, and watched the open mike show
it was actually really cool.
Then we all had to go
so we gave them directions home
and then we almost missed our train.
Then josh came back to my house
and we had teh sex.

just kidding, we watched Balto.
Haha, yes, Balto.
I hadnt seen that movie since I was like, 9..
Its pretty much the greatest movie ever.

Then friday
I went to the remembrance day ceremony
and a jobie practice
and then jessica came over
and we studied debate some more
and I stayed up until 2am
writing my speeches.
Then I had to wake up at 7 to leave.
Not good. Not good..

Well Staturday was pretty much
the greatest day EVER

I could go on for forever about how awesome the debate was.
So I will.

Well, the first debate jessica and I were affirmative
and we KICKED ass.

I was cross examining this guy
and jess was taking notes
and then she flipped her hair
and the guy was staring at her
then was like "sorry, can you repeat the question?"
Oh snap, jess is hot.

Then the second one we were negative
and once again, we kicked ass.
But the 2nd affirmative speaker
was the biggest bitch ever.
She was lucky she was across the room.
Then for the 3rd round
we lost..
But thats because it was an impromptu round
and we had to say that the stampede
should be a 10 day municipal holiday.
also, we got lost in the school so we had zero time to prepare.

then the Jr. open finals
wow, how awesome!
Both teams were from abe [my school]
so they both had the same research and everything
Sean and Georgiann, Kees and Miranda,
theyre like all really good friends
and get this
they studied together the day before.
They actually did a mock debate with eachother
Haha, I thought that was pretty sweet..

And abe CLEANED UP at the awards
it was so cool.

Jr Speaker Points
2nd went to Sean
1st went to Kees.

Jr Teams
2nd went to Kees and Miranda
1st went to Sean and Georgiann

Sr Speaker points
2nd Will

Sr teams
1st Josh and Will.

Jr coach
Gerry Doak

Sr Coach
Gerry Doak

So, we won 8 out of 14 awards given out.
Hahaha, sweet.

But no one knows what Im talking about,
so thats enough about debate.

So, that night I left for red deer
and now Im still in red deer

Sunday I went to go see josh film his movie
Im such a supportive girlfriend

its a basketball movie
and all of the people there were from the red deer college
except josh, but he was supposed to be the best person on the team
and he was like, 5 years younger than everyone else.
and like 8 feet shorter
hahaha, I thought it was pretty funny.

It was actually really cool though
I was there for like, 7 hours

Nothing too exciting happened
but it was cool.

Thats pretty much it for this week.
It was awesome.


I need your strength

Wow.. What has happened? This week went by so fast, and each day brought a new problem with it. By the end of the week everything just added up, and I had a breakdown in fashion. I couldnt stop crying... I dont even know where to begin..

Im not going to write it all out. I would have to be extremely selective of what I say
I think its just best that I dont.

But trust me.. its been one hell of a week.

Its 11pm, on a Friday, && Im going to bed!?
Unheard of.

Ill leave a real update tomorrow morning.

Thank you everyone for being so supportive.