Tags: window

where is my mind


I find myself wanting to write less and less here. I think I'm running out of things to say, so I usually end up talking about my day. Then later, I will think, oh I should've written about this, but then I get too lazy to change it all.

Today, I'm making my own loaf of bread. This is the first time I'm ever making my own bread, so I'm just hoping it will come out okay. Although it's quite a shame that I have nothing to even really put on it.
where is my mind


This is what, 2 days late? I can't even begin to tell you what kind of weekend I've been having. My internet has been down since Saturday afternoon and I've gone everywhere that has free wifi just so I could post this photo. Saturday, I figured the internet was just down and expected it to be up the next morning. Sunday morning comes, no such luck. So I headed over to Borders since they have free wifi...no luck. The servers were crowded and moving so incredibly slow, so I had to leave. I walked over to a local coffee shop, no seating available. I decided to try again today.

Anyhow, I'm getting ahead of myself. Saturday was a very stressful day for this reason. John is basically out of a job and had no way of looking/applying for a job. I'm paying for everything on my own. I have no food to eat. No money to go out and enjoy myself. No money to pay bills. This is fucking terrible.
where is my mind


And here is yesterday's photo that I was never able to post. This is the day I spent running around trying to find free wifi to use. No such luck.

My internet went out on Saturday afternoon. We called our internet company, RCN (by the way, if you live in Chicago, NEVER USE THEIR SERVICE, EVER.) They told us what we could do to try and fix it, pretty much told us all the obvious things we could do. They told us they couldn't come out until WEDNESDAY, even though I need the internet not only for this project, but also so I can get another fucking job. They then told us that if there is something wrong with the equipment, we have to pay 15 bucks. I'm sorry, but why is that my responsibility to pay 15 dollars for THEIR shoddy equipment.

I have really been hating this weather lately. It gets incredibly dark by 4pm, you would think it was 8pm. I haven't seen the sun in so long. It's always so dreary and nasty. Makes me wanna stay in bed all day long.
where is my mind


Here I am today, posting on time. Very sorry for all the late posts, but my internet company sucks as you have read. I walked through powerful wind gusts and pouring rain just post these photos, so I really hope you appreciate that hah. My umbrella practically broke because of the wind. I thought I was going to fly away. I might have to come here again to Borders tomorrow because my internet probably won't be fixed until Wednesday in the afternoon...hopefully.

I am just so sick of everything. Everything. I'm sick of my friends not calling me when they say they will. I'm sick of work. I'm sick of not having any money. I'm sick of not being able to eat a fucking full meal. I'm sick of John not having a job. I really hope this month won't turn out to be such a complete disaster. Lord help me.
where is my mind


My computer has been acting weird lately. Maybe it's because this thing has been on nearly every day. I'm excited to see the end of this project for that reason alone. Turning this thing off for a straight week would do me some good, I believe.

I'm staying in because it is cold out and I'm tired. I need to save my money and I need to get some rest. I think this would be the perfect time to detox, ya know?

I know I look distorted in this, and I like it that way.
where is my mind


Massive Attack certainly was a spiritual experience. Such a fantastic and colorful set. Bright lights and fog, it looked like a dream. They played in front of a huge screen that was scrolling names and news events and quotes from well-known people. It was quite inspiring. The crowd was weird to me. I felt like I walked into a time warp. I noticed a lot of Europeans speaking several different languages. Definitely didn't feel like I was in Chicago anymore.

Tonight, I'm going out with a few friends. I have the weekend off, so I might as well use it to my ability. I'm excited to enjoy this beautiful night. Speaking of beautiful nights, Chicago has been seeing some really lovely days as of late. Perfect Fall weather.
where is my mind


I bought this outfit from the thrift store. The shirt, the pants, and the belt. This entire outfit cost me 7 dollars. I also bought a few other articles of clothing. I'm very short on fall clothes. I seem to have more summery clothes than fall clothes. Lots of tank tops and skirts and dresses. I wonder why that is, considering it is mostly cold in Chicago for most of the year.

I think it is time for a big change. I'm definitely going to have to quit smoking. I said I was going to quit smoking at the very beginning of this project, and I still haven't accomplished that. It was working for the most part, but then I moved out, and once I moved out, I didn't feel so guilty when I was around my parents.

If I stop smoking, I'll save myself 1,000 dollars a year, which means I can put that money towards food, clothes, and rent. I think that sounds like a good plan.
where is my mind


Today went well. Thank you for sending me your positive vibes. Everything turned out great and I made my delivery to the gallery this afternoon. Should be up by tomorrow. I have a few little extra things to do, and then I can rest easy until October 21st when I will be having the reception.

This weekend was so incredibly stressful for me. I feel so relieved now. Phew. Sooo looking forward to seeing Primus this weekend and finally getting a few days off of work!