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mark sanchez :(

The night before, life goes on

  • 3rd Nov, 2008 at 9:35 PM
I'm so ridiculously overwhelmed right now. Midterm after midterm, essays, term papers, newspaper articles, internship applications, job interviews (or rather, job interview, singular... *crosses finger for Wednesday*)... I've pretty much been living at my desk these past few days.

It doesn't help that I'm back where I started with my hd_hols fic, i.e. wanting to scrap it and rewrite the whole thing because it refuses to cooperate. I've never really felt limited by my writing ability until now. Well, no, that's not true, I have, but I've never felt this limited. I don't know if you guys are aware, but not being able to write something even though you know exactly what you want to write is the most frustrating thing in the world. (I'm not sure if that even makes sense; just trust me on it.) I'm hoping an extension will give me time to get over this, but idk :( I just have way too much to do. I can't afford to sit in front of my laptop for hours on end, waiting for inspiration to strike. I seriously don't know how some people manage to consistently churn out amazing fest fics in the last week or so before a deadline. I need to learn how to do that, seriously.

I'm terribly stressed about the election tomorrow, too. No matter what the polls and experts say, I don't think Obama has clinched this win yet, not even close. I'm even more concerned about prop 8 than the presidential election. My campus is fairly liberal, so no on prop 8 is the general agreement around here, but I know it's the same everywhere in California. One of my roommate's friends has been spewing a bunch of crap about protecting religion, and he keeps shoving it in my face and then getting offended by my "hateful immaturity" when I basically tell him I don't give a damn about what his religion preaches. *takes deep breaths* I can't wait for this election to be over. I guess we'll know what happens in a day...
aggravated
mark sanchez :(

...

  • 30th Oct, 2008 at 10:11 PM
My feature outline is kicking ass, wtf. Mark and George are perfect together. Anne couldn't work better as an antagonist. All of them have character arcs and chemistry together, and -- get this -- THERE IS RECOGNISABLE TENSION IN THE STORY! Why can I not be this productive/disciplined with my hd_hols fic? *is sitting here whipping through a month's worth of sequence outlines and totally ignoring hd_hols* :(

I think the fact that basically everything H/D has been done already is interrupting my creative flow. I'm so concerned with being original and avoiding ideas that have already been beaten into the ground (virtually impossible -- while I do come up with good ideas every once in a while, I always muck them up when I try to write them, which brings us to my problem of not being able to put a creative spin on old ideas, which I won't go into because this side note is already too long) that I can't just focus on writing the damn fic. With my feature, I have so much more room to tell the story I want to tell, because my audience isn't familiar with the context and characters. They don't have set standards by which to judge the story. I have so much freedom, and it feels amazing. It also helps that I don't feel helpless knowing I'm up against writers with talent that could eat mine for a light snack. Yay for mediocrity!

Dammit. I wish I'd gotten into writing H/D five years ago.

/end whiny rambling which always seems to take over my writing-related posts
bitchy
johnny weir 2

...

  • 23rd Oct, 2008 at 1:49 AM
So now that I've heard some post-Idol stuff from Cook and Archie, I've come to the conclusion that I was wrong about Archie needing the win. IMO, he's going to be WAY more successful than Cook when their albums drop in a few weeks. Archie already has several awesome leaked clips and a fairly successful hit with "Crush", whereas no one really cares about Cook's "Light On". As always, the ones who try to "do their own thing" without at least attempting the pop thing screw themselves over, a la Blake Lewis. I really hope Archie does well, because his album sounds like it's going to kick ass.

In other news, my hd_hols is still a work in progress. The good news is that it might actually be below 18k this time! That's kind of a major accomplishment for me, because I tell myself every fest that I'm not going to let the fic get away with me, and it always does. The bad news is that I still have no idea what to do with the last 1/4 of the fic. I want to sit down and talk over the whole thing with one of my betas, but I never have any time for a lengthy discussion ;____; I'm eying winter break wistfully, but of course that's not much of a help, considering the fic is due a month before I get any sort of break. *bites nails*

Also, I FINALLY got a compliment from my screenwriting professor :D :D :D He sounded so surprised when he told me my outline of the first sequence of my feature was good. I might post it here later after I've revised it to include his critiques.

I'm worried about getting deeper into outlining, because the whole 16th century religion thing is kind of scary. I really just want to write Tudors slash, but apparently shameless gay porn isn't appropriate in a screenwriting class :(
tired
johnny weir 2

H/D inspired reveals

  • 12th Oct, 2008 at 6:59 PM
hd_inspired reveals are up! marguerite_26 wrote my favourite fic, Burn, Burn, and predictably enough, draykonis drew my favourite art piece, Pest Control. The cool thing about the fest was that I found out a lot of interesting stuff about new and old authors that really took me by surprise. The biggest disappointment was that none of my prompts ended up getting written :(

I wrote One-Winged Angels using a_queen_bee's prompt. I probably won't repost the fic here, but I will respond to the reviews eventually. Thanks to all my fantastic betas, especially avada_k, aki_hoshi, and brknhalo241. I would've scrapped the fic long ago if it weren't for avada_k -- she forced me to keep writing every time I hated the fic so much that I wanted to toss it in a fire. I still don't like it, but at least it's finished :P aki_hoshi and brknhalo241 were both absurdly helpful in rewriting the ending and improving the fic in general. If anyone wants a taste of what the ending looked like before they brought their good sense and ideas to the table, have a look.

The last-ditch-effort crack ending of doom which I was prepared to send to the mods if worst came to worstCollapse )
nauseated
johnny weir 2

next gen fest pimp

  • 30th Sep, 2008 at 4:00 PM

Art by draykonis
HP Next Gen Gift Exchange Fest


Sign-ups for pinch hitters are now open. If you missed the first round of sign-ups or want to help out (because it looks like we're going to have a few drop-outs), please sign up! If you can't write but want to help anyway, you can always pimp out the fest for us :D
drained
mark sanchez :(

More whining

  • 20th Sep, 2008 at 2:41 PM
Oh man, I just came up with an awesome idea to make my boring hd_hols fic way better. Too bad the best part of it is on my recipient's squicks list :(

jlfjkd;ja I seriously don't know why I sign up for fests. They always result in me forcing myself to write stories I don't care for. I solemnly swear I've learned my lesson and won't sign up for another fest after this one for a long time. If I can even get through this one...

And while we're on the topic of fests, hp_nextgen_fest sign-ups close tomorrow evening, so go sign up, yeah? :D
disappointed
johnny weir 2

...

  • 31st Aug, 2008 at 4:43 PM
draykonis coloured my birthday sketch! :D :D :D It looks even more awesome in colour. *clings*

For those of you who've been waiting all summer, hd_inspired starts posting tomorrow. *bounces* I'm so excited to read the fics written for my prompts!

Speaking of fests, there's only one week until sign-ups open at hp_nextgen_fest! I've set the participant cap at 60, so make sure you sign up as soon as possible if you plan to participate.

Off to finish writing a date sequence due on Monday. *bites nails*
groggy
johnny weir 2

...

  • 27th Aug, 2008 at 11:02 PM
Got my hd_hols assignment, and omg I'm terrified because my recipient's preferences are totally opposite of what I feel comfortable writing, but a few of her kinks interest me, so I'm hoping I can get by focusing on those. I have an idea in mind, but I'm worried it might not be what she's looking for. Am going to ask the mods about that in a few. STILL, SO EXCITED TO WRITE FOR MY RECIPIENT!!! :D I need to share my idea with someone. aki_hoshi, get ready for a longass email :P

MY FIRST OP-ED FAILED. Well, not really. It's just... I had to write about a topic I didn't feel very strongly about, so now I've no clear thesis and I think my editor is frustrated with me, lol. Nothing I can do about it but get his edits in tonight :(

Also! My screenwriting professor worked on Friday Night Lights, and he told us everything about the writing process for TV. He is seriously awesome and I adore him. But the class is so damn long :( WITH SO MANY WRITING ASSIGNMENTS, DAMMIT.
frustrated
johnny weir 2

...

  • 19th Aug, 2008 at 9:37 PM
brb, moving my shit across the country.

(also, for those of you interested, I posted the sign-up template over at hp_nextgen_fest)
stressed
johnny weir 2

AS/S fest reveals

  • 16th Aug, 2008 at 3:07 PM