This journal isn't even friends-only, I just don't post. This account is active for communities, etc, though, so you can friend me if you'd like and I'll read your posts.

I'm also on twitter - mainly k8/JE. It's my real name so I don't want to link, but feel free to comment/PM and I'll find you on there.

I'm monologue33 on tumblr here. Go ahead and follow if you'd like!


I dunno why I like this one so much since it's kind of weird but... Also Yasu's was pretty cute and totally yasu...

credit: kingkun

[writing] 1/2 past, 1/2 present
ps-junsu, i miss you. [as tagged, mirotic shanghai october 2009]

will you meet me halfway?Collapse )

Yunho is washing his socks.
Title: Yunho is washing his socks.
Author: _monologue_
Pairing: Jaeho
Rating: PG-13
Genre: Mild angst. A bit sappy.
Length: Stands alone. 360 words.
Warnings: I'm more of a poetry and short prose writer than a short story writer, so my pieces are short and often have structure. If this isn't your thing, you may want to skip this.

Summary: Yunho washes his socks. Jaejoong tries not to look.

A/N: I've written a few dongbang pieces here and there, but this is the first that I've polished to post quality. Concrit is welcome. Inspired by 2007 Yunho, particularly dream concert in this case.

They've been back in Korea a day and it's hot...Collapse )
Tags: , ,

Katy Perry's song is NOT no big deal OR innocent
i just read a rant about this on someone else's journal, and started writing them a marathon comment that extended to the point that i decided i should just really post this here.

i kissed a girl and it was so wrong, sorry boyfriend!Collapse )

Fic [ish]: Before you stop [Selfish Love] -miyavi/??
Title: Before you stop [Selfish Love]
Warnings: annoying poetry when you really want a proper fic =op
Rating: PG-13, maybe soft R
Pairing: miyavi/???
Disclaimer: This didn't happen, and I've never met miyavi.
Summary: You'd burn me if I let you.
Comments: uwaa, i'm really starting to post fic here!  i haven't worked out where i'm going to post miyavi fics yet, so maybe i'll link to this again later. so far everything i've found is for a specific pairing.  but i'm planning some miyavi/kvk boys, so i'm prepared to be an outcast anyway =op. also, this ??? person really is ???.  i didn't write it with a specific person in mind, but it's definitely a boy that miyavi can easily top.  so definitely not a kabuki boy.  so, pick your favourite bottomy visual boy, and insert him here =o) also, my apologies for the annoying poetry when you really want a fic.  but primarily that's what comes out when i write.  or cryptic drabbly prose. but we'll see. *quits notes while she's ahead*

Tags: ,

the revival of the monologue journal
right.  so it's been nearly four years since anything's been posted here.  i've decided to leave the old stuff because it's interesting and nostalgic to me, but i'm shifting the focus of this journal completely.  i have my own personal account now, so this account will be strictly for fandom stuff, community memberships, possibly fanfiction, things that i don't necessarily want associated with a journal where reallife friends and aquaintances are friended.

current fandomy stuff that will certainly be gushed about here includes L'Arc~en~Ciel and miyavi + kvk boys.  hurry up and announce your tour dates!

also, i'm keeping up with the ingestion tradition that i started when i used to post here and i was semi-eating disorder.  i hope i'll reveal that though i'm trying to lose weight right now, i'm certainly eating a realistic amount of food, and hopefully something healthy.

a cheat day... rosewater.
blue corn chips and hot tostitos salsa
christie maple cookies
1/3 of a beef tenderloin with mash, jus, asparagus
work randomness including spring rolls [with meat in them?!]
1 bottle kokanee
1 pint tankhouse ale

procrastination... the writing's on the wall.
amazing funk band last night. i want to go back! and i wanted them to play another set. paced the drinks really perfectly and could've danced all night.

all night long...

jordan didn't pick up alana.
neither did greg.
or matt. well, it was looking like matt was going to for awhile there.

and what do i wake up to this morning on the radio?
more funk. so i must've been meant to go.

character development:
swallowed my pride and asked jess to drive me downtown.

donated my soon to be defunct number to two people and email address to two people.

worried about dave. with laura. she's awesome.

kathleen apparently thought i hated the hostesses. the hostesses apparently thought i hated the hostesses.

apparently i've got rhythm. and hipbones.

1 swiss chalet messy chicken sandwich with fries
1 small glass chocolate milk
1 apple blossom
1 cup coffee
1 pint sleeman cream ale
1 tall double rye n ginger
1 crazy greg chocolate drink
1 rye n coke [JORDAN!]
2 rye n gingers
1 corona
1 sicilian kiss
1 labatt 50 [yes, i work at beerbistro]

remaining cash: approximately 12 dollars.
absent cash: approximately 48 dollars. not bad.

2 careful quotes from two sick friends.
the invincibility factor
-[someday] by jordan dyck

we'll diffuse bombs and walk marathons and do whatever together.
whatever together.
-grandaddy - AM180. previously quoted by laura diciccio.

character development:
keys to new place today weren't in appropriate mailbox. met girls that live on second floor of new place with two kats as a result. seemed nice enough. names over my head. saw anna during failed key retrieval. she is back with ROB. puke.

alex has excommunicated himself this week. i'll miss him.

hostessing at place of employment painfully imminent. will have to work on telephone answering and plate stacking with left hand due to presence of oversized watch on right. must also struggle with THE HAIR.

nik's grandmother died and he didn't tell me.

ingestion: [30 march/04]
1 tim horton's extralarge double-double with milk, please.
1 glass tomato juice with lemon
1 tex mex burger with fries side mayo at gabby's
2 o'hara's glasses v8 juice over law n order
look mom, no alcohol!

skipping school to work.
and our impulses will bite
at the ankles of our fears
so swallow the knife
carve the way for your pride
and my hands are tied
the problems lie within
so we pray for night
to start over again

so let tonight be our last mistake...
- story of the year.

two most significant things happened today.

i jerked off for the first time in a public place. i won't tell you the specifics, but no one saw or heard. it was interesting.

i broke two ceiling panels at work. i'm willing to chip in to pay for new ones, but i hope they don't cost much. particle board should be banned for use on ceilings. actually, i don't know if this flimsy shit even counts as particle board.

character development:
further bonding with jo over lost keys.

ran into anna. got invited to scary film. will have to back out tomorrow.

found out online acquaintance to hopefully someday maybe be friend is actually 33. realized how age knowledge sometimes changes perceptions quite significantly.

still angry with dishwasher from incidents that happened last week. this is reminding me how i can hold grudges involuntarily at times, and is proving an interesting reminder of how bitter and vindictive i can be.

1 tim hortons extralarge double double with milk that did not win me jack shit.
1 bowl of ice cream and chocolate fondue
2 cans coca-cola classic
various work nibbles most notably including some fries with the mayo danny made today and way too many broken skor bars.
1-2 cups of work coffee
1 st ambroise pale ale

on saturday taste tested st ambroise oatmeal stout vs another oatmeal stout in a bottle called samuel something. bottle won. also indulged in a bottle of delirium.

motivational speakers
[real title left in too-large-large chef pants. why are they chef pants if i'm not a chef?]

undergraduate student
graduate student
post-doctorate hell.
fire razing cities
---saturday night

little [me] still [you] doing this.
respect for you when i'm stuck falling on[back?] down.
[wrote about drunken danny.]
--ditto that. date was 6 march.

just some unpolished stream of consciousness i wrote after big discussions and a little beer after work on saturday.

earlier tonight i was tryign to articulate good randomness vs. bad randomness. i thought about it, and i think randomness can have negative connotations when it's emotion-driven instead of physically driven. not emotions like love, just emotional closeness. it's strange when a previously non-existant physical element suddenly becomes existant without you really thinking about it.

"if you can't have financial discipline for yourself, if you can't say, 'i'm not going to spend here, i'm going to allocate there,' ...if you can't say that for yourself, how are you going to run a business?" - jp richards

"the best way for you to learn is to write 'em all down" - greg howard

so i took the low road. again.

character development:
i. killer talks with jordan on saturday. sickness, hospitals, dying, bodylanguage, work, career, choices, stress, schedules, home, help.

ii. jordan refuses to call his poetry poetry. but proposes to lend me some of it. he also knows the difference between a compliment and a compliment.

iii. dave bronfman still owns a car and is still sweet enough to be the only guy i will let escort me to my door. he also has no aversion to flying giant paper airplanes across the diningroom at 1am while managing even if there are still upwards of fifteen patrons in the restaurant.

iv. my mom can put a positive spin on anything and bring me up sometimes from the lowest lows even when i'm supposed to be doing that for her.

v. anna is so much more beautiful than me. and is horrible with directions and street names.

tuesday 10 march -
1 tim horton's extralarge coffee double-double with cream even though i ordered milk. won me a donut though.
1 piece of mocha-related cake at future's bakery in the annex.
random nibblings at work.
1 tripolina
add goat
add cream
extra garlic, extra pesto, extra sauce.
1 large glass tropicana nopulp orange juice
1 half-litre st. ambroise pale ale. quickly becoming 'the usual'. i'm sick of snoreau, and ephemere may only be ordered when already tipsy or when greg is on the bar.

you must've really liked me.
not just the mystery of my hair
not just our shared observances
not just the way i'll make fun of you when we're drunk
not just in it for the money
you must've really liked me.
i was just too scared to understand

---[6 march/04]

humans are so diurnal
not really. just day-by-day.
today you are here
helping me feel
hearing my thoughts before i've heard them yet.

today you are here
here in what today might be my heart
hands in places that make me laugh out loud

tomorrow you're not
good intentions but bad follow-through
lost black and white half emotions even if whole truths

tomorrow you're not
and i let my head hit the floor
feeling that the more i remember, the more you forget
day-by-day. not really.
more like every minute, every hour,
fueling your nocturnal fade from my real-ty
but never my memory.

---4 march/04

weird that those were written about two different people.
anyway. new journal. i'm also blogging elsewhere, so this is going to be a writing journal primarily. i was occasionally posting poetry there and it didn't fit into the general 'flow' of the journal. if i know you from fflog or the lpc, leave me a comment and say hi. and if i don't, then i hope you didn't find my randomness uninteresting.

character development: brent repeats himself when he's drunk.
had good hugs last night from coworkers. i like late night goodbyes.
made jordan a normal-shaped dirty pizza. as it is now officially named.
got reamed out for swearing in the kitchen. i think i deserved it that time.
told brent my maple idea.

5 march/04 - 1 tim hortons extralarge double double with milk. the second rim i've forgotten to roll since roll up the rim restarted.
randomness at work including several brownie pieces.
1 tallboy ephemere
1 half-litre of st. ambroise pale ale. now becoming the beer of choice to the point that greg will pour without asking.
1 spicy sausage at yonge n bloor with hotsauce, ketchup, green olives and pickled hot peppers.
1 decidedly medium sized bowl of shreddies with skim milk.


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