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I don't think I should link to it anymore, and I tried to stay away from this issue, but as I've gone in and out of the cosplay scene I have also grown sick and tired of the crazy double standard -- let's face it, most humans of the XY chromosome in cosplay fandom WILL post photos of scantily clad girls who haven't even met these fappers. And then there really is no way I can keep my opinion to myself, considering that I have a (younger) sister who is both internet-famous and FHM famous, even more than the cosplayer said to be peddling sexual favours has become (though definitely not to Alodia, Tuxedo Team, Kipi -- my age is showing, Dani, or Yaya levels).

Allow me to share my opinion, unpopular though it may be: for me, if the cosplayer is selling sexual favours because she has legitimate issues with money, if she needs to support herself through more than just the next costume (or 3, or 5), then I won't get in her case. Doubly so if she doesn't say or do anything to contradict herself and her actions, because in that case I still would have more respect for her than, say, Jerry Polence, who said she would be a nun but didn't follow through with that AND had terribly unholy behaviour in so many ways to boot. (Irony of ironies, said sister is a friend of Polence. It's a surprise to some people that I'm civil around this particular fellow ex-cosplayer.)

Plus to all the men here who are reading this, and even the women too, I'm going to quote what my BFF in the Philippine cosplay scene has said: if you condemn the girl for what she does, but then post pictures on your own Facebook of scantily naked female cosplayers / Korean actresses we all know would never give you the time of day anyway, then that makes you a hypocrite. (We know who most of you are. We see your Facebook feeds, Tumblr accounts, Twitter handles, your blogs, your social media networks and even your private posts. Even you Gamer Totoy. :D) You have no right to objectify females yourself and then complain / mock a girl who at least uses her OWN body for it, and not someone else's. So honestly, to all the male posters here, stop being dickwads with your holier-than-thou attitudes since you're all going to kiss and tell whether or not she or any girl bangs you, anyway. (I suspect this double standard actually persists because many of you were rejected by her, or others like her, and if not that you simply weren't able to afford her services.)

Finally, if it is proven that indeed she IS doing it just to get herself a shiny coming-of-age party, well, she is indeed sadly horribly misled by her priorities in life. Not to say that her need isn't valid, but in the greater scheme of things, having a fun, grand debutante party can still be done for a cheaper budget through better planning. I mean, come on, just take a look at Jeane Napoles' Blogger account and debut post-party video -- she had SO MUCH MONEY to burn (all taken from decent hardworking taxpayers like myself, by the way) and still came up with a party that's nowhere as cool given the materials, equipment and personnel she had at her disposal. She tried to have a party like Tony Stark from IRON MAN 2 but the video alone shows it's not quite as happening as her spin doctors and video editors try to make it look. .

Oh, in case you're looking for me, this is crossposted on my:

Fina-fricking-ly, yes, I acknowledge I am turning into the queen of unpopular opinion, but that also means flames will be doused with water after being used to cook delicious spam and eggs.

That's all, thanks. ^.~v
Stage: Pilipinas
Mood: annoyedannoyed
So my great fantabulous friend uesugi_rin posted a fabulous, well-written argument about how women have always and continue to receive much less benefits than the men.

It shames me to say that my religion (which I have picked out because it has helped me cope immensely with the events of my life) is conservative to the point that it has dictated how women should act, dress, speak, walk, eat, think and even sleep -- short version: in such a way that men are not tempted.

Well, excuse me, but while I am Catholic and I enjoy kicking ass (especially krav maga), if anyone bothers to tell me at all how to be a "respectable" woman, then I will definitely hit you at the balls or at the gut, whichever part of you hurts the most faster and better. And if I can't do that immediately for any reason, then make no mistake, I am definitely biding my time thinking about it before I finally find the chance to do it.

I am a woman who wishes she can still let loose dancing at the clubs, who enjoys dressing up in a sexy-cute way, who likes ribald jokes and who feels most at home swearing like a sailor. That does not mean I wish to be raped, enjoy being felt up by people whose hands are best kept to themselves, or like being the subject of adjectives alluding to my (non-existent) breasts, (fairly shapely) bum or (absurdly long) legs.

The Jesus I know loved (and still loves) His mother immensely, stood up for and spoke to women of all sorts of leanings, and had many female friendships (a part of me will always root for Him to have had at the very least romantic feelings for Saint Mary Magdalene). He sacrificed His life for all humanity, never once taking into consideration how we act, dress, speak, walk, eat, think, sleep and believe, because He could have chosen to save only a few but instead made sure to save as many as He possibly could with that one act. Sure He knows every single detail about every single creature in this earth, but He is revered exactly because He will always prioritize the positive actions I would have contributed towards making life better for the people (and living things) who are around me. So even if He were to walk among us right now and blush at my current body-con dress and stacked stiletto platform heels, I'd like to think He will just smile, nod, and let me carry on.
20 December 2012 @ 01:10 pm
It has been a year.

So in the course of 12 months, 52 weeks, and 365 days, I have kept myself busy with work and with life.

I've earned some new clients, and held on tightly to old ones. I have had two assistants assigned solely to me, which has taken a bit of getting used to since I'm hardly mentor material, but I think this has helped boost my productivity.

I have witness my older sister getting married, as well as three of my closest friends; while others have gotten engaged and gotten together. (There are those who regrettably are no longer together, which makes for awkwardness, but I will figure it out.)

In these past 52 weeks, I have gotten back in touch with old friends (the ICTUSians and some college blockmates), and I have made some exceptional new ones (the Hiddlestoners, the Yuppie Days With The Lord community).

I obviously have gone for broke in many ways, but where my finances have suffered (OUCH), my life and even my work have been enriched.

I went through a severe crisis of faith. Both my faith and I have survived it.

I have never tried so much great new food in my life!

I have taken self-defense lessons and continue to get back into shape. I have gone through most of my triggers (I was in EDSA on Christmas Day 2011; mid-June 2012 was memorable, because being surprise-shunted into the Quezon City Post Office rendered me a barely-functioning depressant till the end of July; and today I'm off to Eastwood, taking the route I was held up on to get to the destination I would never reach this night last year). I have actively worked against and confronted a number of my attackers, and even if they eventually posted bail, I am no longer afraid of them.

And most of all, while the incident has reduced my capacity to become creative (I hate it that trauma does these things to me), it has not yet succeeded in reducing my will to live and fight.

I like to think I'm winning.☺☆♡

* Most of my personal photos now on Facebook; fashion and cosplay shoots on Lookbook, Chicisimo.
26 July 2012 @ 11:17 pm
Shamelessly taking this from She-Hulk jactinglim and tagging mai Steebe mithlin_megil, velvetkitten__ and the booming chocolate_daze because, y'know, YRT Assemble! should be all in this together. X3

Under the cut because long test is LONGCollapse )
Mood: awakeawake
Days after I was able to post this, we caught one of the four men who held me up.

His name is Pablito Manatad. He was supposed to be driving TYL 409 on 22 Dec but he was Badong/Man #1. He's from the Visayas but lives in Quezon City.

He is muscular and heavy-set but has a big gut. He also has a rose tattoo on his left shoulder/arm, and is apparently part of the mostly-Visayan Scorpion Gang that has connections all the way to Cavite.

He was caught because the taxi cab was caught for a traffic violation. The impounding police called us when they realised that the cab was the hold-up cab that they had had an alert released for. The drivers were asked to be there while the owner had to verify if it was a double plate since it was caught when the original was at the garage.

However, the others are still out there even if he has spilled their whereabouts. Please pray and share information about this unceasingly so that more people can defend themselves and even turn these crooks in. And please pray for myself and those of us who have chosen to fight back -- I am learning as early as now that it's a hard, long, lonely, tiring, uphill and costly battle, but if we want to change the system and empower others like ourselves, we will have to do what must be done. 

Thank you very much.

Mood: awakeawake
I wish this were untrue, and I wish I could undo this, but it needs to be shared.

At around 7:00 pm on 22 December 2011, Thursday, I withdrew money from Security Bank Annapolis GH branch, near my office. At 7:30-ish pm, I was hailing a cab across Richbelt Terraces. I only remember the cab being a beat-up white four-door sedan car with plate number TYL 409. I can't recall who the driver was at the time and the name of the cab as written on the cab body outside sadly. I do now recall the locks were faulty (I locked all four doors), that the front windshield had the "cleanfuel" sticker (signifying it's using LPG gas power instead of gasoline), and black rubber at the back windows. The seats were all black leather and had the taxi information, which should be printed legibly as mandated by Philippine law, all blurry/erased.

We made the turn from Annapolis, to EDSA, and then the U-turn under Ortigas flyover. We entered corner to White Plains, at Temple Drive, past People Power Monument. At a vacant lot nearby (before Meralco), and ironically while I was in the middle of texting my family my whereabouts, four men came in and they kicked him out of the cab.

  • Man 1 (guy by my right, alias "Badong"):
    Crew cut, chiseled face, somewhat pointy chin, small eyes, muscular build but
    slightly big stomach, with stubble, dark-skinned

  • Man 2 (guy by my left): Dark-skinned, round young-ish face, chubby cheeks, bulging eyes, no beard/moustache, short hair parted at the middle, wearing blue long-sleeved Adidas sweater with white stripes at shoulders and sleeves, had a baseball cap that looked a lot like the red Air Asia cap with white text, pudgy arms and legs

  • Man 3/”Boss”: Square face, flat cheeks, moustached stereotypical bad guy minus the big beard, dark-skinned, far-set bulging eyes, light moustache, beard, wearing blue long-sleeved Adidas sweater with white stripes at shoulders and sleeves with what seems to be like a white shirt inside, with grey beanie hat, gravelly voice, muscular arms, pudgy legs, always holding on to a pipe (tubo, the one they use for the sinks)

  • Man 4/designated driver ("Bobot"): White cap, white shirt, circular glasses, features remind me of Brod Pete (a local comedian), thin, dark-skinned

  • I heard someone say “pasensya na (I’m sorry)” but I don’t recall who it is. I do recall the perpetrators drove me around EDSA from Ortigas Avenue to Quezon City, as far as the U-turn right before SM North. They kept threatening to
    bring me to Bulacan (a province where I actually DO have kin, but it's got a bad reputation for being a place where bodies are trashed) and rape me especially when I initially refused to give them my belongings. They took my ATM cards, my credit card, my black BlackBerry Torch 9800 with black Otter protective case, my personal Nokia phones (one is a pink 6020, the other is a black 2700 Classic), my Sony Cyber-shot silver T-100 digital camera, and my black Sony Vaio laptop. After “Boss” made some calls via mobile (they were very clever at keeping the numbers hidden), the gang dropped “Boss” off at Cubao walkway underpass, EDSA southbound (major thoroughfare) at around 9:00 pm so he could withdraw money. He came back and tried to strangle, punch, slap, throw shoes/slippers at me and generally beat me up when he couldn't get my credit card's cash advance PIN out of me (it's fairly new and I don't memorize the PIN at all). They took turns trying to beat me up at some point, except for Driver because he was driving. I fought back, and they told me they would rape me because I wouldn't give them enough money (they needed PhP20,000 and even used Typhoon Sendong as a reason to hold me up). At around 10:00 pm they turned into NIA Road near the Bureau of Internal Revenue in Quezon City, and threw me out the cab. When Boss tried to hit me with a pipe/tubo, I vaguely remember clawing and kicking back, taking whatever was left of my things, and ran. I found myself at the Quezon City Post Office security guard house (at the gate), and made phone calls to the QC PD, my mother's office, and the houses of lovediesel and Azalea as those were the only numbers I could contact.

    With my family finally arriving around 11:30 pm to almost midnight due to the terrible traffic jam, I went to the QC Police Department at Kamuning/EDSA. We waited for a graying-haired 40-ish cop in a white undershirt and police uniform pants named SPO4 Patricio Sanoza (Sanyosa) to whom I gave my statement, which is attached. I told him about what I recall about the cab, but he did not ask at all about identifying the criminals.

    My SIMs have all been blocked/disabled, as have my ATM and credit cards. Unfortunately they have switched off all phones so I am not sure if they can be traced at this point. I have just found out that someone now owns the Torch, and that she bought it at a grey-market sales spot called St. Francis Square. The The police are able to trace the ATM withdrawal transactions at Metrobank Valencia Hills though. I am cooperating with another branch of the QCPD in catching the perpetrators.

    The following day, a friend gave this information about the cab that held me up Plate Number: TYL 409 / E#: 2E-3254892 / C#: EE110-8009918 / Moving Vehicle #: 138000000225318 / Col: Freedom White / Sticker #: 2011122773755 / Moving Vehicle Type: Car / TradeName: / Make: Toyota/ Series: COROLLA XL M/T / Year Model: 2001 / Moving Vehicle Class: FOR - HIRE / Org: MARVIN SANTOS. / Official Receipt #: 000201111852482 / CR#: 000000005541645 / Body Type: SEDAN - 4-DOOR / FReg Date: 09-25-2001 / LRegDate: 09-30-2011 / Fuel: GAS / Route: MARIKINA ANY PT TO LUZON / Franchise #: 96-945 / FEDate: 12-31-2007 / Total Apps: 0 / Total Alarms: 0 / Customer ID: CO1378000031312 / Address: 10 MAYSAN ST. VALENZUELA

    Separately, I dropped by the QCPD Kamuning once more to get the official, correct copy of the police report I originally filed. There I met a woman named Donna Araujo who was held up on Christmas Day from Main Avenue in Cubao and dropped off at Balete Drive which is very similar to what happened to me. I am trying to get her assistance as she saw the name of the car, which is made purely of consonant

    Please stay safe everyone. Hope your Christmas is better than mine. I've seen posts where people blame me for not being vigilant -- excuse me, but I was held up right in the middle of sending my parents an SMS where I was riding, the point here is not whether or not I should've been vigilant but that they still ambushed me anyway even after acting towards my own self-preservation!

    And to these motherfuckers who hurt me and others like me, I hope and pray you lose everything you hold dear -- every body part, every item, every person, every business, every bit of cash, and every generation of your beloved families and clans -- as befits the punishment you have long tried to avoid.

Stage: Mi Casa
Mood: infuriatedinfuriated
31 December 2011 @ 11:59 pm

Quote for truth as Friends-Only Banner
Image by my sister. I'll make a graphically-enhanced version when I have more time, I promise.

Of course, the more honest entries are available only to the closest of friends and family who I know are used to this behaviour. So if you think you can handle them please feel free to add me.

Thank you for your understanding.

16 November 2011 @ 12:11 am
What would you do if you had a million dollars?

OMG I wish this would actually come true very soon (like, within the next 2 months soon)! T0T

If I had a million dollars, I would, in this order:
1) Save 30% for myself
2) Settle my debts (should be less than 5% of the US$1,000,000)
3) Donate 20% to the advocacies that I actively support (all Philippine-based and Philippine-oriented)
4) Fly to the US and enjoy a month with interploy and xfridays_child, not necessarily in that order ... or better yet, persuade both of them to return with me to the Philippines! (should cost lest than 10% of US$1,000,000)
5) Upgrade my computer (should be less than 1% of the US$1,000,000)
6) Buy new shoes (I break an average of 4 pairs a year. I wish I was kidding. Also, should cost less than 1% of the US$1,000,000)
7) Invest 10% in the stock market (NOT playing it) and in government-issued retail treasury bonds
8) Invest 10% as seed money for my future with interploy
9) Give away the remaining 10% to deserving individuals, not necessarily those belonging to the poverty line, of my choosing

Friends, how would YOU spend your million dollars? X3
Mood: sleepysleepy
19 August 2011 @ 04:45 am
What’s the coolest way you’ve celebrated your birthday?

17th March 2010. I was inside one of the hospital bunks of the Malinta Tunnel during the Philippine media launch of HBO's THE PACIFIC. Afterwards we had a great lunch and toured historic Corregidor Island, where cannons and barracks and memorials are testament to the island's - and my country's - pivotal role in the Pacific Theatre of World War II.

Yes, my birthday was awesome. Yay HBO Asia. dXDb
Stage: Topeka, KS
Mood: cheerfulcheerful
03 July 2011 @ 11:57 am
Azalea the former Shadowmaiden now lost her Dad to cancer. They only found out recently after they got tests (after her brother died), and he was terminal by then, especially because those harmless-looking nodes on his face never really bothered to announce themselves as painful malignant lumps.

A classmate of mine in high school lost her son, the first nephew/grandson on both her and her husband's families. He wasn't even 5 months a month old.

Most people don't know this but my other literary hero was Alejandro Roces Jr. Sadly, his death was what jarred me to return to the young, chipper, impressionable writer I was almost 20 years ago.
Mood: cynicalcynical