i need love.

I miss Kiel so much right now, why is it that we are ten times more needy when we're feeling poopy? I just had dinner with Kiels parents which is a rareity considering Kiel isn't home. lol. But at least I got to eat something.. I didn't feel like leaving. I'm so utterly bored it sucks. :( I tried to lie down and watch disney, but nothing good is on.. that I haven't already seen. I went on AIM for a bit but no one was on. I really hope that my work isn't mad at me... I'd probably be mad at me, considering i've only been there... 3 weeks? guh.. But I can't help it if I'm sick. I would totally tough it out if I was needed but i'm not at all.

Bleh. There's so many things on my list of "wants" right now.. here's a list if I can think of them:

x I need a fill on my nails
x Hair done (eventually) & Cut
x teeth whitener stuff.. (whats the best?)
x I need contacts & glasses
x more clothes
x pierced ears..
x the rest of our furniture
x a necklace
x Jake needs to be fixed + rabies shot
x Credit Cards paid off
x MOVE OUT!!!!

shitty list. lol. I have $900 in the bank.. my c/c is just close to $4000... I've only gotten one check from my job, and I just recieved my tax return of 600 some odd dollars. I figure instead of paying large sums, i'll save save save.. and that way instead of being like "oh I only have 200$ to spend.." i'll see the big amount of money .. and realize that's my small start to paying off my c/c's.. I think it'll help me save quicker. I only owe $5000 on my car too.. so that should get paid off within the year, which will be great.

Kiel & I are taking a trip to california for our anniversary in exactly a month. I cannot WAIT. we seriously need this. 4 days of us. I am DYING to go to the beach with him.. we haven't been since the first few weeks we started dating, and that wasn't so well.. as cheesy as it sounds, the beach makes me smile ... its the next best thing to rain for me. I just want to stick my toes in the sand, and kiss him. ♥

I know I talk about Kiel, Kiel, Kiel but some of you may not understand... he's all I have. Like, at one point my life was so utterly shitty.. and I felt like I could never be genuinely happy.. and out of no where he was there.. and he took every ounce of saddness away from me and locked it up. He makes me smile when I don't want to. He's my bestest friend. That may sound pathetic..that i'm nearly obsessed with our relationship, but in all honesty I don't care. I have nothing else to talk about, I dont have 349305840 friends to hang out with, I have Kiel.. and he makes up for all of that. Sure, i'd love to have girl friends to gossip with, but I wouldn't give Kiel up for that. Not for anything. I can't imagine my life without him in it. really, I can't. He treats me like his little princess, and thats how I like it :) hehe.

Sometimes I wish I could just pick some of you off the computer screen and make you live nextdoor.. unfortunately it doesn't work like that. Mostly, I wish Katie lived closer.. she's like, a twin of me. ♥ I adore her guts a bunch. :) Her and I shall definitely plan a girl road trip to california ♥ right Miss Katie???

anyway, I shall go hop in bed again... but I just may fall asleep this time. (why do I have this sudden urge, to just POST? silly eh) I hope everyone from my website will be able to read this.. if not i'll be sad if I lose touch with those I recently made friends with :(
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