To the SteezPod.
Meet the Rio Karma 20GB Media Player, or better known in my own little world of observers as
The SteezPod has been with me for a while now, and never once did I deny my pride in it, for I was one of the few and proud that did not own an iPod and didn't find it necessary either. After all, I had my unique little companion to carry with me and rock tunes with on all those incredible walks or rides to nowhere in particular. It fit perfectly in the palm of my hand, played wonderfully at the perfect volume, and became the ad-on to my exterior that the iPod served as for 90% of the population. "Screw iPods! Who needs 'em?!" I boasted confidently, hiding in the corner with my own special little rendition of the portable jukebox. My Rio was better than an iPod to me; it was the SteezPod.
And so its reputation began, just as its form started to deteriorate. On millions of trips this sidekick had been beside me, until my pace became too much for its technological limits to handle. The knob caved in and I could no longer browse easily or fast-forward and rewind through songs. It turned off at random moments and would turn on again with 100 less songs than before. There was a short in the headphone jack and it constantly had to be held by a thumb in order to produce sound in both ears. And the volume+ button broke to the point where I'd have to stick a knife or sharp object inside the cracks of the button until I tickled it in just the right spot and it could give me the most wonderful sound of volume increasing.
I knew I had no choice at that point, and since I'd made good grades last quarter (3.9 GPA!!), I asked for an advance on a Christmas present from my father and got permission to walk myself to the Apple store and conform to the rest of society; it was time to give in and buy the infamous iPod.
As much as the SteezPod was a good friend and companion to me, one cannot deny their excitement when they know they're on their way to buy their very first iPod; it's simply illogical to not feel tiny twitches of jubilation when you know you'll be the proud owner of this artful work of technology. I walked into the Apple store anxious and hopeful that my experience would be monumental and marvelous, which my experience in that store usually is, whether its the purchase of the most beautiful computer in the world or an encounter with the most beautiful man in the world. But I was plagued with a nasty and angry black chick who took my iPod buying experience and spat on it with a fat loogie from the back of her throat. 'That Bitch!' I thought, crushed at the incredibly non-eventful moment of ringing $308.09 up on my credit card and holding the case of my new companion for the first time. Perhaps this was a doomed situation, I thought to myself, and it was a sign that the anticlimactic purchase of my day and near future meant this iPod was damned and cursed to be nothing but a nuisance and reason to miss the days of my functioning SteezPod. Massively disappointed, my head hung a little lower on my walk out of the store, which was interrupted halfway by a friendly Leo and fellow graphic designer at my school.
I sadly explained my situation to Djordge, whose empathy became overwhelming when he slammed his foot down and told me that I would be returning that cursed iPod I held in my hand and buying another one 15% off on his employee discount and with anything I wanted engraved for free on the back. I followed the day-saver behind the desk where he began to order me a new iPod while I praised him endlessly and got excited again. When it came time to think of what I would have engraved in it, I wrote the very first thing that came to mind, which I figured at that moment could not have possibly been replaced by anything better even if I'd had years to consider it.
So I dedicated it to my old friend.