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Flag-waving Nov. 11th, 2010 @ 02:12 pm
There are several things in our American culture that hinder the progress of social change. The fear that keeps these things in place is manifold. Fist is the fear of drawing attention to oneself as a dissenter. The second is the fear of alienating one's self from what appears to be the popular majority. This is not a fear based on the desire to be popular or accepted, but the desire to be accepted is based on the fear of violent retribution and the safety of anonymity.

The first obstacle to social change that I would like to address is that of the high regard for military personnel.
I was fortunate in my military service that I came of age at a time of relative peace, so that I was not immediately dispatched to a war zone. I was, however, a supporting member of our first air strikes on Bosnia. It's not something that I am proud of. But even sitting safely within the bowels of a floating airfield, I had to come to terms with the fact that I was supporting violent actions against people I didn't know who had done nothing to me, my family or my nation. I didn't fire so much as a hand gun in the length of my service, but I insured that those who did got paid for it, had a bed to sleep in when they were done, and college tuition when we got back home.
When I joined, I had great ideals of protecting home and family, of defending the weak and innocent, of pride in nationality, of patriotism and camaraderie in my countrymen. These ideals were laid waste even before I left boot camp, when I learned that our primary function as a standing military was as a "show of force". In other words the military's job is to travel around the globe beating their chests and threatening smaller nations into either supporting our government's agendas or getting out of our way.
I am still very unclear about how this defends or advances freedom for anybody except the military itself. And even this doesn't extend to the military personnel who fought for that freedom. The only freedom this buys is the freedom of the military as a whole to move and act as it chooses.
Freedom IS free. In fact it is the only thing that is free because it is a personal viewpoint where one is not restrained by the will of another. No government or military force can provide it. These only exist to restrain freedom, to control the actions of the people within the circle of their influence. The word 'force' itself implies this relationship where ones will is enforced upon another, violently if cultural and economic means do not suffice.
We have no freedom because we are all held be the chains of law enforcement in the form of violence against our persons, and against our livelihoods by the authority of our judges.
We have no rights because they can all be taken away by these same judges.
Instead we have privileges that we earn by our labor and maintain by keeping our heads down.
One might say that I have the freedom to voice these opinions and I would have to agree, to a point. I may say these things, but only so long as I don't gain a following or act on my beliefs. As sure as MLK, JFK and John Lennon lie in their graves, when someone starts to initiate change, they will be slain. And as long as the government puts the day on the calendar and hangs some poor lackey for the 'heinous assassination', the people will stand by and watch.
Speaking out is also a two edged sword in that, while we are allowed to meet and hold rallies and demonstrations against our governors, we may not do so in their presence where we may be heard. These demonstrations also act on a cultural level as a pressure release valve. We all get together and make signs and yell at the top of our voices, then go home feeling like we did something, but no change actually occurred and we're all back at work in the morning, literally setting our clocks and the pace of our lives as dictated by our governors.
In the end, we all support the actions of the whole by our support of its parts. It was ultimately the feeling of pride and support that I got from my family that kept me in the service doing things that were against my own morals. It was the paycheck, the free bed and breakfast, the promise of schooling if I survived and above all of this, the respect of the ignorant that kept me there.
Thus I say, "I do NOT support the troops! I do NOT support the police! I will NOT support those who enforce the will of our governors upon the world for they either believe it to be righteous and justified or they have sacrificed their own morals (just as I had done) for the benefit of our support."
I will say, however, that I support the poor schmucks that got duped (just as I had) into signing their lives away in the name of patriotism that no longer exists.

Item two: Patriotism. Patri- of the father, or following paternal lines. Patriot- one who supports or defends his paternal line (ostensibly against other paternal lines).
Way back when, a person's country was defined by the lands held by his family, thus his countrymen were all his relatives. With the rise of imperialism and the emplacement of regional governors, one's country became a static, defined geographical area regardless of the spread of one's family, thus eliminating loyalty to ones family (countrymen) and instating in its place, loyalty to ones lord. Here the boundary between country and nation became blurred and patriotism was replaced by nationalism. Of course no sane person would agree to such a thing, so the term patriot was kept in place to maintain the blurry boundary so that any national hero was termed a patriot and received accolades from his countrymen even though it was by his actions that the people were kept under the rulership of the empire.
So here we are, in the present day, left with feelings of familial loyalty that are twisted and abused to elicit our support of the empire's soldiers of fortune. And in our fervor we allow acts of violence to be carried out (in our name) against people we've never seen so that the empire's influence may spread across the globe supplanting other cultures and instating their own governors over them.

Item three: The Heartland. Once again we have a vocabulary power-play enacted upon our very hearts. The term "heartland" doesn't overtly refer to any land in particular thus it maintains its effect on everyone fairly equally. What it does is refer the mind back to our hearts, to feelings of love and the support of family and friends. It calls to mind idyllic images of county stores and fishin' holes, of little boys in overalls and little girls with pig-tails. A place that only ever truly existed in the paintings of Norman Rockwell. The place that it actually refers to is the strip of geographically and culturally isolated States that lie in the center of the continental US.
What this accomplishes is that it creates an imaginary ideal for us to defend. It causes the residents of these blessed interior States to feel justified and righteous in their beliefs, because, as the name would imply, they are still operating within the values of the American heart where others have moved away from American values.
But in truth, the values that are touted as American by nature are either shared by all human beings or were never real to begin with.
Take, for instance, the values of the family. The family is valued, not only by all humans, but by nearly all living beings. But the belief that this has anything to do with ones sexual proclivities is entirely religious and, in America, primarily supported by those culturally isolated within what we call "The Heartland".
When one lives in a place of isolation, one grows up with the understanding that the way they live is the way people 'should' live, or at the very least just the way people live. Thus when that isolation is breached, the lives that they encounter outside their little world are considered aberrant, unnatural or unrighteous. People coming out of isolation feel attacked (or "offended") by those that they come in contact with because those people live in ways that are contrary to their own.

When it comes down to it, all of these terms are nothing more than empty words with no real meaning. Their only use is to allow each of us to individually fill in the blanks with our own values so that, every day we can tell ourselves that we patriotically support our troops who fight for our freedom and the values of the American Heartland, and with our heads held high, freely return to our economic slavery.

X+Y=Z No one can argue with it, because everyone gets to fill in their own values, and if it doesn't work out then it's your own fault.

New poetry Jan. 8th, 2008 @ 03:48 pm
A Possible Constable Stop

I am incorrigible.
She is encourageable.
We live in a dirigible
And we fly through the sky.

Living lives unacceptable,
To a nation despicable,
And a people who speak double,
We turn to our pipe with a sigh.

~Eric Shehan

Also found this quote.

"As a general rule, Providence seldom vouchsafes to mortals any more than just that degree of encouragement which suffices to keep them at a reasonably full exertion of their powers." [Nathaniel Hawthorne]

Thank you Anchasta Dec. 3rd, 2007 @ 05:36 pm
Good God! There's still things I haven't done!?!? Anyone want to help out?Collapse )

This took me just over one hour. Nov. 11th, 2007 @ 02:52 pm
It's time for me to admit to a short-coming that has me VERY frustrated these days.

I can't read very well. I can read. I comprehend what I read. It just takes a lot of concentration to make the letters stop swimming around the page. Switching between Eric thinking and Eric interacting takes quite a bit of focus. I usually have to have people repeat what they just said. But switching from Eric interacting to Eric reading can take several minutes sometimes. I usually order food with a picture on the menu, especially if I'm with a group of people. I can't stand the way people look at you expectantly waiting for you to place an order. I feel like... useless, burdensome... kinda retarded. And don't even think about making any sort of combination of the three. Thinking, interacting, reading... I think they reside in secluded recesses of my brain and refuse to speak to each other.
So it was with great hope that I discovered blogging. It allows me the time I need to focus on and pick apart the words 'spoken', orchestrate a reply (and it IS an orchestration, and to research background information so I don't look like an ass. I have, however, had a very difficult time jumping on-board the blog-train. For one, my eyes are rather sensitive to light so I definitely prefer, Illuminated Text to illuminated text. Scrolls work much better for me than screens. Also, being written in light played across a screen, the letters actually do move! It's just subtle enough to only be seen in the very back of the brain though, so it's just another step in the process of validating everything I see.
That, I think, is the crux of the problem. I believe in everything, so I don't believe anything. In other words, I have to double and triple check everything to make sure that it really is what I think it is before I react to it. And because I am acutely aware of the effect of my actions on the rest of the world, I have to double and triple check my reaction before I can react. This means that in social situations I end up sitting on the sidelines processing what's going on while everyone else gets to actually do and say stuff. I get to interject sometimes at key points and this makes what I say and do rather powerful, but not really any fun because people just kinda sit there kinda dazed and unsure what they should do next.
I had hoped that in the online world, people would slow down a little to take it all in as I do. That it would allow me to interact with people on a more or less equal level, at least in as far as response speed.
But, alas, now I sit in quiet and self-deprecating amazement as I watch Amber's android like eyes take in the whole screen at a glance. Her lightening mouse-hand clicking links I've yet to see. Her tongue-like fingers speaking casual, witty and meaningful responses in text fields that I've only just noticed were there.
The internet is the new world. My wife is somewhat of a princess in this new world, with many wonderful friends and peers of the realm. I can ride the train of her gown through the court while she hob-nobs among the beautiful people.
For now though, I close my eyes against the tears. Rest my chin upon my breastbone, and turn, with dusty dun colored robes rustling like old parchment, and slip back into the cavernous recesses of my own ancient and secluded library where pigeon-hole scroll cases watch me with the eyes of empty skulls. Maybe I can get in on the next new world. At least this one has free porn.

Nov. 11th, 2007 @ 02:24 pm
Your results:
You are Supergirl
Wonder Woman
The Flash
Green Lantern
Iron Man
Lean, muscular and feminine.
Honest and a defender of the innocent.

Click here to take the Superhero Personality Test

Your results:
You are Riddler
The Joker
Dark Phoenix
Poison Ivy
Dr. Doom
Lex Luthor
Green Goblin
Mr. Freeze
Riddle me that, riddle me this, who is obsessed with having a battle of wits??

Click here to take the Supervillain Personality Quiz

Personally would've chosen Mystique, but I suppose the Riddler is a bit more appropriate to my personality.
Other entries
» Must've run through a muse-puddle!
Here is a song I composed on the bike-ride home today.

It Smells Like a RoseCollapse )
» Dreamtime Revelations
I woke up in tears Sunday morning. Not the tears of joy or sadness, but the tears that are wept when a long-sealed door is finally opened within the mind. the dream was like this~Collapse )
» Validation
Holy shit!! The hottest thing happened to me yesterday.
Amber and I ran to the grocery store to assuage our evening munchies. As we rounded the corner of the brownie aisle, we passed a mother (cir 35 yrs) and daughter (cir 14 yrs) coming from the nest aisle over. As we passed, they both (without noticing the other) looked me up and down. Totally in synch. With the exact same cock of the eyebrow. With the same deep, brown, hungry eyes. Even the same flirtatious glance to the side. It was fucking HOT! Not to mention extremely gratifying to touch two ends of the spectrum, two generations at once.
Women should be more open with their admiration. I think men would be less needing and strutting.
» 16 things you'd tell your 16 year old self.
1.You've been brainwashed, but so have the people who are bainwashing you. Forgive them and go do what you enjoy.
2.You really are sexy and attractive, girls just don't know how to show their appreciation.
3.Religion is for people who can't find God. You're already BFF's.
4.Magick is what you do. Don't waste time studying it, just do it confidently.
5.Continue your martial arts training.
6.Pay more attention to Star Wars. It's more applicable than you think.
7.Spend more time with Big Grandma, she's the only sane one. Write down her stories!
8.Just because people mean well doesn't mean they do you service. Learn to disregard other's opinions of you.
9.Buy some bongos.
10.Ask tough questions on forbidden topics.
11.Sex and sensuality is not as dangerous as they would have you believe. Your authority figures are broken in this area of their lives. Just be conscious and responsible.
12.Don't be ashamed of your desires and inclusive sexuality.
13.When they say, 'men's clothing' they mean, 'coarse, formless, and bland.' Wear what you want. Also refer to number 5.
14.Do be a little more careful with Dad's truck.
15.Do some medical and anatomy research. There's a reason that you are the way you are.
16.You are not gross like snips and snails and puppy dog tails. It's ok for boys to pamper themselves too.
» interest and pic meme
I suppose I should have said 'orgasmic living'. I think I'll change that. But essentially it means tearing down the wall that defines sexuality and sensuality and making each motion, each touch, each breath and every experience and interaction as intimate and orgiastic as is bearable. This does make getting to know people kinda tricky because folks aren't generally expecting that kind of intimacy. There's also a tendency in many to cling to people that they touch in that way. So it leaves me sitting back and Lovingly observing for a while as I determine where people are in their lives and what they need or are willing to receive. It may be something I put aside soon as I have found that those bonds make it hard for me to maintain my fluidity. Something that has been very important to me.

universal engineering~
Essentially, I study, through experimentation and observation, the structure and function of the universe and its various parts from as many different perspectives as possible in order to make the necessary changes at the foundation to produce the desired shift in the existing structure.
Also, have you seen the fjords?

I love flavors. There are quite a few that I'm not too fond of, but (unless it was forced)I enjoyed the tasting if not the taste itself. There is also a bit of the old oral fixation there, isn't there? And it's just one more sensation to add to the first interest! Yeah!

The first picture is one that I use for engaging and enjoyable conversations that center around spiritual concepts and personal growth. I believe that is was taken while we were setting our house alter in Charlottesville. The hat was made for me by my dear sister Dragonfly.

The second picture is one that I use for exhilarating, joyous, glamorous or celebratory posts. It was taken at our friend Joel's house while we were getting ready for club night.

The third picture is me. Find your own metaphors there. My first chat room screen name was Spiralvoice.
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