November 28th, 2004

(no subject)

Until you've felt this connection, this connection within your heart and your soul, and this connection to someone else, someone else's pure life and intentions, you haven't lived.

I want wonderful words to flow onto this screen so everyone can know how lucky I am to be alive. How lucky I am to know the people I do, and to be connected to them in the ways that I am. I feel guilty that I used to be such a selfish and terrible person, but I know now that those things really don't matter. That my plans for life and for other people and just the future in general will make up for the mistakes I've made in the past. I know that the love I feel when I tell this person that I'm proud of them and that I'm thankful for them will never die. I know that I can't ever be away from them because the light within them is something that simply consumes every part of me. And they can't be taken away from me because they just can't. They are spectacular, they are the most wonderful thing ever put on this earth. And I'm here to help people, and I think they can help me with that. Through creation of music and art and all things spectacular, I'm going to change the world and maybe even help you. And I really, really, really hope that I don't sound like I'm absolutely crazy/clueless. Because I really think that I might. And I hope you aren't too critical on me because this is the purest thing I can give to anyone. This is my truthful testimony that I am an amazing person who is going to do amazing things for people who need them. I feel that I'm helping already, just by telling you that I love you. I can hear the way your voice perks up and I've felt your heartbeat and I know that I matter to you and that's what makes me feel so spectacular. I love our conversations, and our connections, and how I know that I am a part of you and that you are a part of me. How we are a lump of joy and happiness, something that'll never end. And I love you more than anyone or anything or any place or song or just... anything, ever. And I'm so glad that I know you because I wouldn't be the same with out you. Thank you so fucking much for even existing, and thank you even more for being the one person I feel connected to more than anyone. I truly love you more than anyone, ever. Thank you so very much.

And I'm glad I painted over those lyrics which were written over those three sad little hearts, because now I see they were so very incorrect.
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