Tags: politics

word can help write your suicide note

Internet Scrapings

Scientists have discovered a tiny 2 cm (1 inch) long shrimp that can snap its claws to create a 210 decibel noise.
For reference, a rock concert from the first row measures 110 decibels. The noise this tiny shrimp creates is louder than the sound made by whales, louder than the sonic boom of a concorde breaking the sound barrier, louder than a gunshot, and would most certainly shatter a human eardrum.

Five unique, strangely colored beaches you never knew existed.

Surveillance cameras catch school security employees stealing surveillance cameras.
Most meta headline ever?

Ten last pictures ever taken of notable people alive.

Three years after Chevron blew up this man's house, he has yet to receive a penny in compensation.
The explosion of the Chevron oil depot was Britain's biggest explosion in peacetime. A documentary is being released to put pressure on the unresponsive oil giants to pay up.

Disgraced Pastor Ted Haggard has revealed that he was sexually abused as a child. Oh, okay then, that explains everything, right? He's not gay, just a victim, etc.

A South Carolina pastor has demanded those in his congregation who voted for Obama to tell God they're sorry for doing so, and that they shouldn't take communion until they do. But the good news at least is that he's officially not the antichrist, according to LaHaye and Jenkins, respected Christian authors of the Left Behind novels. Phew, glad that's cleared up.

Also, priest threatens and attacks reporter who was asking him about an incident where he threw a worshipper out of mass because she had Obama stickers on her car.

Japanese Air Force Major goes to supermarket to shop for women's underwear while wearing nothing but his shoes and carrying his wallet. Apparently, the Major while on his way home from a late night farewell party for a colleague stripped off his clothes behind a convenience store before going in and buying panties and panty-hose. The Major did not appear to be intoxicated and “he had just his wallet and his shoes on him. He thought it would be funny if he went into the store stark naked, that it would surprise people..."

Japan is bored with sex.

200 year old church literally stolen. Quote: The disappearance of the Church of the Resurrection, some 300 km (186 miles) north-east of Moscow, was not immediately noticed. Picture not available.

Houston zoo elephant dies of elephant herpes.

Sex offender found living in University library.

Actual headline: Armless thief steals TV.

Drunk man drives to police station to ask cops if he's too drunk to drive. He was then arrested for drunk driving.

Fearless convenience store clerk to armed gunman with gun pointed at her: "Either shoot me or leave my store."

Psychologist explains that conmen don't con you by getting you to trust them, but by showing that they trust you. Anyone saw Matchstick Men? That movie kind of blew my mind.

Yet another human foot washes ashore, this one being the seventh severed human foot to wash ashore onto the Canadian coastline since August 2007. Still no explanation. This time, however, it's a female foot. The other six have all been male.

German politician shuts down a German Wiki because it links to another wiki article on him that mentions his previous work with the Stasi back in the day.

More tagged, categorized offbeat and abnormal news stories over at fivethreenews or 53news.blogspot.com :D
word can help write your suicide note

why you should read Scott Adams' blog

If you are a registered voter in the United States, today you must choose between the Antichrist and the only guy that scares the piss out of the Antichrist. My strategy involves buying a wheelbarrow and waiting for the rapture. I understand there will be a lot of gold fillings and diamond earrings left for me and my homeys.

From http://dilbert.com/blog/entry/signs/ :D