July 12th, 2011

word can help write your suicide note

Internet Scrapings etc.

Cracked.com: 6 Lies About the Human Body You Learned in Kindergarten.

Cracked.com: Why 'Psychics' Need to Stop Pretending They Can Solve Crimes.

On a related note: The lies I told as a psychic - Mortifying Disclosures.

Diver Snaps First Photo of Fish Using Tools.

I, for one, welcome our new fish overlords.

Pictured: one billion pixel camera.

A 43-year-old woman died after suffering a massive allergic reaction brought on after she had sex with a dog in Limerick, Ireland. The woman, a mother of four children, suffered the reaction to the dog’s semen after willingly engaging in sex acts with an Alsatian.

White supremacist heckles, threatens black man at a bar, picks a fight. The black man so happened to be a boxing champion. Pictured: Result of the fight, which consisted of just one punch.

Naked woman found dead after getting into a fight with a church statue.

It's a crappy way to travel but it beats going through the TSA
Headline by Fark.

Indian elephants from a Hindu temple in Kerala are to be sent on month-long holiday package complete with massages and bath oils as they recover from their arduous labour.

Three words: Taiwanese funeral strippers.

Pakistani woman chops off ex-husband`s genitals.

25% of Car Accidents Linked to Gadget Use.

Why you're paying more to breathe: how drug companies turned a well-meaning environmental regulation into an opportunity to suck billions from consumers.

Prescription Drug Deaths Soar In Michigan - In Michigan, more residents now die from prescription drug abuse than from heroin and cocaine combined, a federal registry shows.

Drunk 15-year-old caught driving car with drunk mum in backseat.

Lunatic Michelle Bachmann signs pledge stating that black people were better off under slavery. Then says she didn't bother reading it before she signed it.
Quick: what's worse, the fact that she signed this pledge, or the fact that she wants to run for president with a habit of not reading legal documents she signs?

Clinic Michele Bachmann founded with her husband performs "ex-gay therapy," reports say. The clinic has received thousands in taxpayer funds.

The News of the World wasn't the only Rupert Murdoch-owned paper hacking the voicemails of families of crime victims and relatives of dead soldiers.

Rupert Murdoch's "News of the World" tried to pay a New York City police officer for private phone records of 9/11 victims.

Campaign to boycott Rupert Murdoch is gathering pace.

Sacked News of the World staff appear to have fired a parting shot at their former editor Rebekah Brooks, disguising mocking messages in the crossword of the tabloid’s final edition.

Jellyfish, With Numbers Increasing From Warming Waters and Pollution, Force Shutdown of Three Power Plants Worldwide.

Women And Children First: Technology And Moral Panic.
“If you electrify homes you will make women and children and vulnerable. Predators will be able to tell if they are home because the light will be on, and you will be able to see them. So electricity is going to make women vulnerable. Oh and children will be visible too and it will be predators, who seem to be lurking everywhere, who will attack. There was some wonderful stuff about [railway trains] too in the U.S., that women’s bodies were not designed to go at 50 miles an hour. Our uteruses would fly out of our bodies as they were accelerated to that speed... “The first push-back is going to be about kids. Is it making our children vulnerable? To predators? To other forms of danger? We will immediately then regulate access. I don’t want to seem cynical because there is a reason why we worry about children, but I do think you can tell that’s where it’s going to start.”

Cracked.com: 6 Pro-Gay Marriage Arguments for Fighting With Crazy People.

Actual headline: Banana at Large After Attacking Gorilla in Strongsville.

Facebook Helps Israel Blacklist Air Travellers.
"Pprotesters have been stopped in their tracks after Facebook aided Israel in cracking down on the group of activists from the UK, France, and Belgium who planned their event using the popular social networking site. Facebook allowed government agents to track the activists activities and then create a black-list of people who participated in the planning of the protests. The black-listed group was then forwarded to airlines with instructions to prevent the activists from boarding air flights to Israel. Over 200 activists were prevented from flying after being added to the airlines terrorism watch list, according the the AP report. Was Julian Assange correct, when he warned that Facebook was a giant, 'appalling spy machine'?"

Iraq vet loses two legs in the war, survives, comes home, is killed by rollercoaster.

Woman plants vegetables in her garden, now faces jail time over it.

New Delhi hospital invaded by monkeys who figured out how to use the motion-sensing automatic doors.

Two Tunisian prisoners attempting to escape by setting their mattresses on fire succeed. Kind of

Travelling salesman becomes real-life George Clooney by clocking up a record breaking 10million air miles.

If you're gonna let your toddler drink beer, at least have him do it *inside* your trailer

Man loses stomach in barfight.
"Gutierrez was stabbed in the abdomen and lost his stomach: "Mr. Gutierrez's stomach actually fell out of his body cavity. One of our crime scene officers found it, collected it and it was taken to Parkview Medical Center, but the doctors said there's no way they could attach it."

Superbug strain of Gonorrhea discovered, is resistant to all antibiotics.

"Neighbors checked on Mendoza's son after they noticed the father acting nervously and fleeing from his east Bakersfield apartment in his wheelchair. Inside, they found little Angelo naked and bleeding; the boy had numerous bites to his hands and his eyes were swollen shut. The boy told them, "My daddy ate my eyes out." The father was found in the backyard, where he chained himself to a tree and began hacking at his leg with a pickax while yelling incoherently."

Native American family beaten up by Neo-Nazis, one of whom brags that his dad is a cop. Cops take statements from the Neo-Nazis, not from the family; then arrest a family member for an unpaid ticket. Cops release attackers and hours later they brag about it on Facebook. The FBI is investigating.

Anonymous Releases 90,000 Military E-Mail Accounts on Pirate Bay. They obtained the emails while hacking government contracting and consulting firm Booz Allen Hamilton.

Bear-safety lecture in Yellowstone interrupted by bear.

Marine uses YouTube to invite Mila Kunis to be his date at Corps Ball. She says yes.

16-Pound Baby Boy Born in Texas.

Reagan: So inspiring.

How the Religious Right is at the root of the budget mess in Washington.

Russian zombie parade, in pics.

Suspected crash landing turns out to just be a pilot stopping off mid-flight at a strip club.

The Copyright Lobby Absolutely Loves Child Pornography.
One of my more insanely paranoid theories proven true.

Man kills 4-year-old on assumption that he is gay.