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[09 May 2006|10:33pm]

so i found a way to make all my nasty nostalgic feelings vanish along with every other bad thing.

the answer?

i'm going to marry connor oberst. still.
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[07 May 2006|01:17am]
i got second runner up in talent and interview, so i think i did pretty good.
i didn't place or win, but yayyyy IT'S OVER.


k, my life is back to normal now guys.
brinnnnng it on.
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new song. OH THE EXCITEMENT. [26 Mar 2006|01:01am]
we fly fast with melted wings across the parking lot pavement
because innocence wasn't in the blue prints
and we walk the streets with holes in our feet
we are sacred and mishapen
we don't sleep, we thrive on the hours that go by
clapping our hands and dancing around
shaking our heads in cardboard crowns
so turn that bottle up we've got to make our escape
and get away from these clumsy bodies that are flawed by design
and cut off all the weak strings barely holding us
we're a new breed made out of old disease
and our voices can be heard all over the place
death can die and we'll just keep singing a song
we turned up the decibels and you'll just tremble when you see our sound
it's painted in the cement and dripping through the wires
we are everywhere, in the door handles and history books
yeah that was us laughing in the corner when it started to sink
because we are hollow and we echo with our heavy pulsing hearts
and we just floated right by the beginning
we can make friends just by waving our hands across our eyes
because it's not goodbye, we never say goodbye
it's just for every moment that can never finalize
so let's press our faces together for one last time
then walk away towards that neon light
with joints that don't connect and a vision that's split
we don't see the clear black and white extremes
we are the in between
we just want to tap our feet and shake our heads
and dance on the graves of the living dead
we won't ever die out or cease to be, we're telling you so
we're the ancient black vines in the churchyard that always grow
time can't touch us, we doged that bullet ages ago
and got ready for forever because we'll never die
death is just another crack in the ground
so watch your step and you won't slip in and slip away
crossing your heart as you fall hoping for instant grace
we throw our arms up and yell for a flood to wash away everything
all these dirty people and buildings and walking splintered beings
cause we'll just float on our backs and watch out for the cracks
right now right now don't you ever say goodbye,
you know that's just another neverending blackhole lie
we'll follow you barely hanging in the sky with our melted wings and holes in our feet,
swinging on the tails of clouds and telling you to look down
and we have been since all these years in the making
we've been misbehaving since creation
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[19 Mar 2006|03:35am]
it's kind of love hate.
and i fucking hate hypocrites and skanks and people who act like they're drunker or more messed up than they are.
i really love my peeps yo. and you, you can suck it because you're unhappy and you know it.
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[17 Mar 2006|11:12pm]
today was mall with rodman. i got aquadisiac eyeshadow from mac. it's teal and glittery and i love it.

we ran into rachel, chris, april, and ben at the mall. rachel is awesome.

last night i talked to kyle forever at waffle house and saw failure to launch with bekah. the movie was a lot funnier than i thought it would be. and i watched red eye tonight at home and JESUS that hit man

guy was hot as hell.

my mom is phsyco.
my dad is funny but prone to rage.
and i like to wear big sunglasses and eat mints.

the end.
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[12 Mar 2006|09:21pm]
this weekend was really fun.
i'm happy with who i am.

but the crisis.
i can't decide if i should grow my hair out crazy long. or.
be daring. and cut if all off. and proceede to have a fro.
8 comments|post comment

[21 Feb 2006|09:40pm]
my tank of new purchases and chinese was a little low, but i fixed that today.
green mac eyeshadow called swimming, golden angel wing earrings, stripey ae pants, five pairs of underwear, and an ipod case. plus plus plus mandarin. mm.

of course, we had to do the whole duck into the nearest store to avoid saying hey to your ex thing, but we weren't obvious at all. BAH. yeahh he totally saw me. and he got his eyebrow peirced. why didn't he do that while we were dating? UGH. would have been hot.

that's about it.
5 comments|post comment

[05 Feb 2006|12:17pm]
friday night was fun.

but yesterday and today i have done ZERO things productive.

and i'm going crazzzy from boredom.
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three more hours. [03 Feb 2006|09:06pm]
[ mood | calm ]

i'm still grounded but my mom has been really nice to me.
i cleaned my room for a reeeally long time today. and threw away a bunch of stuff. it was cathartic.
talked to him yesterday. i'm too nice.

i'm going to do junior miss. good god.

my sister won it, and look where she ended up. ahahah. i find it ironic.
but it gives me something to do/motivate me.
plus, you have to have a talent for this pageant! no skanks allowed.

and now i'm going to go color.

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[27 Jan 2006|09:15pm]
what the hell are you talking about.
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[15 Jan 2006|10:53pm]
she's a sad torn girl and she used to drive the boys crazy. she's lost that mystery like pennies in couch cushions. i walk back into that big house without my shoes, i forgot where i put them. and my hair's a mess like the day we met. it was late and i didn't want to think, and you hadn't shaved and it was so unfamiliar i liked it, a new texture for this worn down belief in giving up. you were wearing cologne and led the way up the stairs i could barely make it there. i laughed and you kissed me and there was friction with our bodies, laced fingers and arching backs, you're used to that, yeah you're used to that. and you put your forehead on mine and smiled and said is it ok is it ok is it ok and i laughed and didn't care i had a few hours to kill.

how many drunk girls are giving up tonight? yeah i'll lead that crusade so raise your hand high.
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[10 Jan 2006|08:50pm]
um my invisible boyfriend is so much hotter and nicer than yours.
he's playing ddr right now, but he's still really hot.

i got another o.c. soundtrack. that makes the total three.
classes are going alright, minus english. i'm not awake enough first block to comprehend british literature.

this weekend i'll probably be in sv for sammi's birthday and martin luther king.

even though i secretly hate black people with a passion. coughKKKcough.

that's about it.
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[04 Jan 2006|11:09pm]
i don't want to go to school.
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first entry holyyy crap! [01 Jan 2006|04:50pm]
2oo6 already!Collapse )

new year's was fun. a little stressful but fun.
i love the barn.

this time last year i was making out with russell hahahhahahaha.

anyways. cherry vodka, jamaican rum, dollar bills, shoney's, closer, and cute pictures while people are sleeping.
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[31 Dec 2005|01:56pm]

bring it on 06.
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[27 Dec 2005|01:37am]
i want sultans and temples and we were blessed back in the day, on a street corner in a feeble cathedral, but we're faithless now and we're faceless now. the fates forgot about us, i don't remember what we looked like. were we as happy as we seemed with our seasoned teeth and blistered hair covering my mirror? they're stuck there because i still believe and you know i'm not much of a believer. now i've got empty pockets and concrete landmarks at one a.m. i was born from tree skin and one of your ribs and i don't know where my heart is, i think he forgot to install it. you were born from the water that once swallowed us whole and we used to be submerged. it was all cloudy and so fucking unclear we couldn't see when that crack of thunder dragged you away to a better place far far away from me and my fangs and snakes. so bang that tambourine, let's celebrate! it's another untimely death for the decade. hey baby, what's your poison? cause i've found a new religion. i don't want to be respected, don't kneel and say grace. i'm not a goddess and you're not a saint. we were blessed back in the day on the street corner in a feeble cathedral, do you remember how we looked with our seasoned teeth and blistered hair. i don't remember, i think he forgot. i've got cobblestone streets and deserted lamposts, i want everything. i always want the most. i'm a straight seven for greed, so let's not think right now. i'm a professional, i'll show you how. you just breathe in me and i'll breathe in you. your veteran eyes and history book hands forgot about that. just drop me off at the end of the driveway where we used to say goodnight. i can make it to the door, and let myself in and climb those stairs to a bed with ten mattresses where i can't feel a thing. i don't feel anymore because you stopped too.
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[25 Dec 2005|06:49pm]
christmas was shitty and depressing this year.

not because of lack of presents, but because of lack of tradition.

i really hate her sometimes.
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[23 Dec 2005|03:14am]
aeon flux poster for jen.
multiple mandy moore posters.
alfie and lords of dogtown for mikey.
ray and under the tuscan sun for mom.
rent for laura.
bridget jones for danielle.
and other ones for other people.

free movie posters at xmas and free movies.
working at pastime is grrreat.
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[18 Dec 2005|11:24pm]
i hate guys.

i hate myself.

i hate being so emotional for no reason.

and i hate the holidays.
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[14 Dec 2005|06:58pm]
it's official.
i own a green 99 honda cvr.
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