Rating: NC-17 for language, hot boys doing naughty things with each other.
Summary: Jensen is smitten. Jared doesn’t notice. At first.
Disclaimer: No matter what I write here, these boys will continue to do whatever they want. If they choose to do what I’ve written, well... all the better.
Spoilers/Warnings: Mentions eps from Pilot through Skin (except for Bloody Mary).
Author’s Note: So, as these things have a tendency to start, strippedpink and I were talking about how very smitten Jensen seems to be with Jared. We were busy squeeing over every square inch of the SPN DVDs at the time. And somehow, this turned into me writing a fic.
Meeting Jared was eerily similar to meeting one of his dogs. Jensen laughed to himself at this realization as he wrestled with Sadie the first night he came to Jared's new apartment in Vancouver. Once she was done jumping and pushing on him with her big paws, he stood up smiling, snagging the six pack he had been carrying from the floor on the way up.
Jared laughed, the kind that makes everyone in the room turn and look. His smile was entirely infectious and Jensen couldn't help it. He smiled back, received his huge two-armed hug (Jared didn't bother with those one arm man-hugs everyone else did), and tried not to knock Jared in the back with the six-pack.
It reminded him of their first meeting in L.A. during final casting. He had walked up, hand extended, his name on his lips, when Jared wrapped him up in gangly arms and a Texas twang that made Jensen think of home.
"Hey man, I'm Jared. 's great to finally meet you, Jensen. Or Jen? Can I call you that?"
Jensen's mouth was still open, halfway through his first name as the hug ended and he laughed a little self-consciously. People didn't really hug him. They stood a regulation three feet away and shook his hand as they introduced themselves. Mostly because that's what he did and he seemed to give the signal that it was the proper way to approach.
Jared, meanwhile, he would come to learn, hugged everyone, cast and crew and fans and cashiers at the grocery store. Okay, maybe not the last one, but Jensen wouldn't put it past him. Jared plowed right through Jensen's inhibitions like a Mack truck or more to the point, a 6'4" half-Yeti, half-Great Dane puppy with a killer smile. Jensen had a soft spot for puppies, no opinion on Yetis (yet) and a decided weakness for smiles of the killer variety. As Jared pulled away from that first hug, Jensen felt a twinge somewhere he tried to ignore. That twinge was not going to screw up his chance at a new show. One where he was in on it from the beginning.
He shook his head, delivering his own grin in Jared's direction. One he had been told before was, on occasion, heart-stopping. "Sure, man. You can call me Jen. My friends do."
Jared slung his big arm around Jensen, jerking him to his side. Jensen half-expected to receive a noogie or get pulled into a half-Nelson, but Jared just chuckled, a deep sound that rumbled against Jensen. "Then that's what I'll call you." Because it seemed that friends was something they were already on their way to being.
So, the phone call telling Jensen the show was picked up made him both rejoice and flush with anxiety and not a small amount of lust. He had no idea how he was going to work in close quarters, fifteen hours plus a day with Jared and not let on his feelings. Jensen was stern with himself. Informed both his upstairs and downstairs brains that co-stars were off-limits.
Well, they should be. This time.
Jensen nodded to himself, re-affirming this as Jared passed him a beer from the six pack he brought.
"Hell, man, you buy the good stuff, don't ya?" Jared tipped his own bottle back for another swig and let out a satisfied sound that made Jensen’s skin twitch.
Jensen tipped the bottle neck to Jared in a quick salute. "What can I say, dude? I know what I like." If Jared felt Jensen's eyes make the slow path from the top of Jared's mop of hair to the bottoms of his oh-god-the-size-of-them feet, he didn't react. Closing his eyes and shaking his head, Jensen gritted his teeth. Making this show was possibly going to be the best and worst thing that had ever happened to him.
Jensen was man enough to admit when he was wrong.
When he slid his hands between Jared’s legs, and took a deep breath, he admitted to himself over and over again that he was wrong. Wrong, wrong, wrong for thinking this was a good idea.
Jared thrust the football up into Jensen’s waiting hands and Jensen stepped back a few, ball loosely clasped. Jared took off downfield and Jensen found that Jared in motion was slightly - no, make that extremely - distracting. He heard Kripke calling that he was open as Jensen stood slackjawed. Finally, he ripped his eyes from Jared’s back muscles straining his t-shirt and chucked the ball toward Eric. Jensen didn’t even notice the ball landing five feet to Eric’s right until his boss was yelling at him to pay attention to the game.
A few minutes and a few fumbles later, the teams were re-aligned. Lunch break was going to be over very soon. Splitting up Jared and Jensen was Kripke’s idea and Jensen silently thanked him. Right up to the moment that Jared flattened him to the ground with a full body tackle, knocking the wind right out of him.
“Fuck, man!” Jensen was momentarily overwhelmed by the sensation of being covered in Jared, his weight and heat pressing into him. Jared needed to move. Quickly, or Jensen’s secret was going to reveal itself somewhere below his belt.
Jensen shoved at Jared’s chest, which fuck was hard as a rock. “Dude, TOUCH football! We’re playing TOUCH football.”
Jared chuckled and the sensation ran through Jensen like a freight train. “Aw fuck, man, touch is boring. Thought you said you grew up in Texas, Jen.” His huge, white grin was momentarily blinding Jensen. That or the concentration it required to not grab Jared’s neck and kiss that smile off his face. Whatever. Something was affecting his vision.
Jensen finally managed to scramble out from under Jared, who just laid on the grass, laughing. His t-shirt was twisted halfway up his torso and Jensen’s eyes flitted to a set of abs he couldn’t fucking believe.
He found himself grinning as he put a hand out to help Jared to his feet. “Fine, asshole. Just give me a heads up when you change the rules next time and I’ll be putting you flat on your back.” Jared took his arm then and Jensen pulled, thankfully distracting him from his choice of words and the image it evoked.
“You bet, dude.” Jared slapped Jensen on the back. “Besides, I figured you better get used to that before this afternoon.”
“What’s this afternoon?” Jensen heard his voice crack and started coughing to cover it up. Besides, Jared’s hand was still on his back, so he got a few gentle pats out of the deal.
“Y’know, we’re shooting the fight scene in the kitchen, man. First big fight and it’s us fighting each other! Isn’t that awesome?” Jared was grinning like a kid in a candy store. Gilmore Girls had never called for too much in the way of physical stuntwork, unless you counted a few fistfights and pretend construction work. He had already revealed to Jensen that he was psyched about doing his own fights and as much stuntwork as they would let him.
Jensen’s mind flashed through the choreography they had learned yesterday and the amount of full body contact it required. Thank god he had the excuse of needing a shower after the impromptu lunchtime football game. It was going to be a cold one, that was for fucking sure.
Six hours later, Jensen needed another shower something fierce. Wrestling around on the kitchen floor with Jared was an activity he had thoroughly enjoyed. Too bad there was also a cast, crew and multiple cameras trained on them at the same time. He was out of breath when they finished shooting and took Jared's good-natured ribbing about him being an old man and needing to work out in stride. No reason to tell Jared it was the strain of not ripping his clothes off and fucking him into the floor which had him lightheaded. No, that was definite need to know information and the kid did not need to know.
Instead he stumbled off to his trailer and waited for the ice cold water to drive him back towards sanity. It was only the goddamn Pilot episode and he was already lost.
When the Pilot shoot wrapped, Jensen was actually anxious. The consummate professional in him was pissed that he was not just anxious about whether the show would be picked up. No, he was also anxious about not getting to work with Jared anymore if the show wasn't. The kid, as he took to referring to him in his mind to further quell his leanings, was a fucking laugh riot on the set. He made it fun when they were getting thrown into walls or covered in mud or learning the proper way to fall. This show was his first crack at high action and it seemed he fucking loved it. He was the one suggesting additional takes if he thought something looked or felt off.
That night shooting on the bridge had been rough. After Jensen shoved Jared into the bridge support for the dozenth time, he inwardly groaned when they yelled cut and Jared leaned in and said, 'Next time, harder, Jen. I can take it. Make it look real.' He shoved himself back into character but it seemed Dean found that hot, too, so he called for a water break.
They were both sitting in Jensen’s trailer, no sound but pages flipping and Jared chewing on something sweet and strawberry-flavored. Day Two of shooting since they were picked up and they were both scrambling to learn their lines after receiving the scripts late.
Jensen slumped back into the couch, forehead creasing in consternation. His constant, half-buried happiness at getting to make this show was being severely tested. Seeing Jared when he arrived in Vancouver had hit him hard. No amount of coaching himself to ignore his intense reaction to Jared was working. He couldn’t stop watching him, considering what he was hiding under all those layers of clothing, what was going on behind those hazel eyes. Jensen was positive Jared was going to notice the tension, catch him watching, but so far, Jared was just...Jared. What could be construed as an act of joviality and friendliness for the cameras and the fans turned out to be the absolute real deal. He knew every P.A.’s name and favorite food and hometown already while Jensen was still struggling to remember who was who when they came to his door.
And now, this script. Which apparently was an indication of his future. Nighttime shoots with Jared, lots and lots of hours in the Impala, inches away from Jared. Everything, with Jared. And oh, in this one, Jensen gets trussed up in a cave and rescued by Jared, who was going to be cutting Jensen down himself and lowering him to the ground. Big hands everywhere.
Great. Just fucking great. No really. Jensen’s downstairs brain thought it sounded great. His upstairs one was just scared he was going to fuck this whole thing up.
Funnily enough, that scene wasn’t the problem. It was after 2 a.m. by now, and Jensen shook his head at his own naiveté. He had been so proud of himself. This was not his first TV show by a long shot, not even the first time he’d found a co-star attractive. During filming, he had buried himself in his character as he always did and come out Jensen on the other side. Which is where the problem started. See Jared too was pretty damn good at this acting thing. Sam was full of anger and angst and intensity and it was largely directed at Dean. Jensen was cool with that, decided Dean was cool with that. It was all cool.
But what happened when they wrapped for the night, or the early morning, was not something he had mentally prepared for and he really should have known better. Coming off an incredibly intense take fireside as the last scene for the night, Jared exhaled, shedding Sam in a moment with one of his trademark grins. Jensen had the fleeting thought that he didn’t need a flashlight to make his way back to his car tonight as long as Jared kept smiling. Of course, he may just be getting to really know Jared now, but he could already tell this was the ‘I’m up to something’ Jared grin and it made Jensen’s stomach flip flop in a painfully telling way.
They were in the woods, the fire still pop crackling, throwing embers skyward and where before it had been a site for the Winchester brothers to have it out over their Dad’s journal, now it was something else altogether. Jared hopped up from his spot, holding up a finger to Jensen, asking him to wait there. And normally Jensen was anxious to get the makeup off and slide into his own clothes, but he was now frozen to the spot. He watched Jared bound off to the side and saw that one of the P.A.’s - Amanda? Angela? - was handing him a bag, smiling shyly up at him. Jared gestured at the fire and she nodded and he stopped on the way back to Jensen, speaking to a few of the other crew members. Jensen frowned, completely confused, until Jared came closer, voice booming through the evergreens, “We’re making s’mores, dude!”
Jensen couldn’t help it. He burst out laughing. Jared fucking Padalecki was going to kill him with his childlike enthusiasm and infectious smile that took in everyone within a twenty foot radius. The flush of warmth that slid up and over and through Jensen when Jared dropped down next to him, shoulder to shoulder, was genuine and pure.
“They said we could have twenty minutes before they put the fire out, man. And Amanda got me the fixins’.” Jared bumped Jensen gently in the shoulder with his own and handed him a stick and a marshmallow.
“You’ve got to be fucking kidding me, Jared.”
Jared frowned at Jensen. “Don’t you like s’mores, Jen?” He asked it like that was the only question on the table, the only issue. Not the hour or their age or their exhaustion or the fact that they were surrounded by crew and guest cast. Jensen looked around and noticed at least six other people were looking for proper roasting sticks and just shook his head.
And that was how at 2:20 a.m., Jensen ended up watching Jared lick marshmallow and chocolate from his long fingers, face glowing orange in the fire, shadows flickering there. And realized he was fucking doomed, but couldn’t bring himself to really care as he grinned to himself and took a bite of his own sticky creation.
Jensen shivered, wrapped up in blankets, feet by the heater. The towel he had just used on his hair laid by his feet. At just that moment, Jared came through the tent flap, rubbing his arms with his hands, teeth chattering.
“Holy crap, Jensen. That water...”
“Yeah, man. Fucking freezing.”
It took a lot to wipe the smile off Jared’s face offscreen, but it turned out four hours in an ice cold lake could do it. Jensen nodded, still agreeing as he shifted, pulling up a blanket that had fallen.
“Dude, are you naked under there?”
Jared’s voice cut through his fog and the chill on his skin in an instant. Jensen’s eyes went wide as he jerked them up to meet Jared’s. Jared was craning his neck, playfully peeking down Jensen’s blanket, which he tugged tighter purely by instinct.
“Nah, man. Still got underwear on.” He grinned, one of his that was all teeth and made his eyes crinkle. A real one, that Jared seemed to be able to elicit with virtually no effort at all.
Jared snorted as he started pulling the snaps apart on his sodden plaid shirt. Jensen swallowed, eyes darting from Jared to the floor and back to Jared, trying to find a safe location. Jared’s shirt hit the floor with a smack and he looked up at Jensen just then, who did everything he could to act like his co-star stripped in front of him every day.
“Who took your clothes to dry ‘em?”
Jensen pointed at the tent flap, words getting stuck halfway in his throat as he noticed the way Jared’s t-shirt was molded to his every muscle, every ridge, every bone. And he kept on noticing until Jared lifted his eyebrows in question. Jensen finally blurted out the answer, “Um, Louisa. Sorry, I’m so bad with names, man.” It was a very convenient excuse for his going non-verbal when faced with the sight in front of him.
Jared just chuckled, waving a hand at him. “You really are, Jen. I’ll have to tutor you sometime, yeah?”
Jensen nodded, focusing his eyes on a loose thread on his blanket. Studying it very, very hard. He could hear Jared unpeeling his t-shirt from his skin and really that was just entirely unfair. He had already spent the whole day being dunked underwater and trying to keep that kid afloat and he was exhausted to the tips of his fingers and toes and now he had to find his self-control once again. The sound of a zipper caught his attention and Jensen nearly lost it right there. Jared struggled out of his wet jeans, losing his balance and nearly falling right on Jensen in the process. Jensen jerked his arms out of the blanket to catch him, warm fingers on chilled skin. He pulled them back once Jared had his balance, but he could still feel the cool hardness under his hands.
“Whoa, fuck. Thanks. That was a close one.” Jared shifted and put one heavy hand on Jensen’s shoulder. “These are a bitch to get off when they’re wet.” Jensen thought God must actually hate him at this point. He knew he’d fallen off the wagon he was raised on by now, but he was still a decent fellow, right? Did he really need to be punished this way, with Jared’s mostly naked body right there next to him, smelling like the woods and the lake and the fucking great outdoors, little rivulets of water sliding down his arms and his chest and - fuck.
Jensen finally closed his eyes, listening to Jared’s struggle out of the rest of his gear, the little grunts sending little shocks straight to his groin. When Jared finally had himself down to his boxers, he snagged one of the warm blankets by the heater and wrapped himself in it. Gathered up his clothes like a good Mama’s boy and took them to the tent flap to hand them off.
When he came back and flopped next to Jensen, pushing his big feet near the heater, Jensen pulled his blanket tighter around him and huddled into it, thankful he still had another twenty minutes to calm down before he had to put his clothes back on. With Jared sitting next to him, damp hair curling around his ears, it was going to be a challenge.
“That you, man? Are you still coming?” Jared sounded a little anxious, a lot tired and something else that Jensen was way too out of it to figure out.
Jensen’s voice was pure gravel, jagged and sharp. His mouth brushed the cellphone as he mumbled into it. “’m outside your place, Jay. Come on.”
When Jared pulled the passenger door open to his truck, Jensen was just resting his eyes. Just resting them and his head against the headrest. For just a minute.
“Jensen? Dude, you asleep?”
Jensen groaned, eyes struggling open, phone still clutched tightly in his hand. “Naw, just...I’m fine.” Jensen starts blinking rapidly, finally crawling towards full consciousness.
Jared shoved a duffel bag into the space behind the seats and Jensen watched him settle in, find the seatbelt, unfold those legs that went for miles under his dash. Jared’s hand on his shoulder made him jump, jerk his eyes away from the tight stretch of denim on Jared’s thighs. Hoping Jared didn’t notice, though he wasn't quite sure how he couldn’t.
“Jensen? Um, I could get a...cab.”
Waving his hands dismissively, Jensen squinted his eyes open, fumbled for the extremely large cup of coffee in his cup holder. Blowing gently on it, he gestured at one still in the other holder. “Three sugars, lots of milk. Help yourself.” Eyes sliding closed at the warm, rich smell of coffee flowing into him, Jensen sipped the hot liquid. The sensation of it burning across his tongue, sending a thread of warmth into his chest only amplified by Jared’s soft thanks as he snagged the cup.
Moments later, Jensen jumped at Jared’s sudden exclamation.
Jared’s hand fanned in front of his face, but Jensen’s eyes slid from the frown coloring Jared’s usually easygoing expression to the tongue poking out of his mouth. Still groggy with sleep and dreams that woke him up hard and wanting, his imagination took liberties with him, imagining that tongue in places he shouldn’t.
Jensen’s own tongue came out to wet his suddenly dry lips as he met Jared’s eyes, starting guiltily. “You alright, Jay?” He smiled a little, made it into an expression of concern.
“Burned my damn tongue. Shit.”
Jared pried the lid off the coffee and blew on it and there were his lips, all pursed and Jensen was really not awake enough to control himself at this point. He wanted to run lazy fingers over Jared’s lips, push his fingers into his hair, taste the rasp of stubble under his tongue. It was just not a good thing.
“Coffee’s hot, smart boy.” Jensen punched him playfully in the shoulder, resigning himself to that contact as the only one he was going to get. He shook his head briefly to clear it, settled his coffee back down and turned over the engine, a small smile still playing across his lips.
Jensen shook his head, rubbing his eyes as they pulled onto the quiet street. He could hardly believe there were other people up at this ungodly hour on a Saturday. They were probably morning people. He would never understand that.
It was a twenty minute drive and less than ten minutes into it, Jensen glanced over at Jared, since his coffee was getting cold. Jared was leaning his head against the window glass and appeared to be fast asleep.
Eyes back on the road for a minute, Jensen exhaled sharply. It figured that he would be just as tempted by Jared when he was out like a light. Even without his ready smile and constant speech, Jared was still drawing him closer, trapping him in his orbit. He dared another peek, took in the way Jared’s too long hair half-covered his eyes, the way the low morning sun kept lighting up his high cheekbones as it came through the trees. Another check on the road and then it was the temptation of Jared’s barely parted lips and the long lines of his neck -- and Jensen was going to wreck his fucking truck.
He let Jared sleep. Jensen drove into the airport, smoothly parked in the short term lot and turned the car off. He spent a minute or two memorizing every single thing he could about Jared sprawled out in his passenger seat. Seeing Jared asleep next to him in any other context didn’t seem particularly likely, so he wanted to take the moment in. Then he promptly felt pathetic and sad, so he reached over and shook Jared's arm gently.
"Jay, man. We're here."
He blinked his eyes open slowly, obviously still clinging to the lure of more sleep. Shooting until five in the morning and then catching an eight o'clock flight had that effect on a person. "Jensen?" His voice was thick and coarse and Jensen wanted to hear it some more. There was the slow drawl there that Jared tried to contain most days, but exhaustion was pulling down his resistance. "Wha-"
"Airport, remember? Place we spent fifteen hours shooting yesterday?"
Jared rubbed his eyes, hard. They were bloodshot and hooded that really shouldn't make Jensen want to rub his thumb over Jared's cheek, but it did. This all felt way too intimate and Jensen suddenly thought he might just crack from being weary and longing and continually faced with what he could not have. Clearly, he needed some time away from Jared and some serious sleep. Jared turned, snapped his neck back and forth and scrubbed his face with his hands. "Right, right. Right." He kept nodding to himself, but didn't move.
Jensen felt the moment turn. Something was off. He talked to fill the time with something. Anything. "You'll be back Sunday night, I guess? Need me to pick you up?"
Jared's mouth pulled up to the left, only half a smile, which felt incomplete and wrong on Jared's face. "That'd be great, Jen. I'll call ya."
Pursing his lips, Jensen nodded. Waited. Though he did not want to know this, he couldn't seem to stop the words from coming. "Going to see Sandy? I mean, uh, of course you would. I just meant - is she in town?" He wanted to kick himself for sounding like a jealous schoolgirl, but he just didn't have the energy to put his words in the right order.
"Yeah, she told me to get my butt down there my first weekend off from shooting. So, here I go."
Jensen couldn't help but notice that Jared didn't sound excited. He sounded burnt out. Which made perfect sense and he really needed to just stop trying to find something that wasn't there. Jared was flying to LA. for less than 48 hours just to see his girl. What more proof did Jensen need to get over this crush or whatever it was?
A cool rush of air snapped Jensen to attention. Jared had the door open, bag in hand, and was looking back over his shoulder at Jensen. His eyes were soft and hazy and there was still that almost-smile on his face. He nodded and got out.
"Thanks for the ride, man."
Jensen called back, "Anytime. Well, preferably not at this time, but y'know..." He laughed lightly, desperate to pull something out from under the weight of the thick mist of the Vancouver morning. "See ya."
Jared's laugh penetrated the fog, low and rough. It made Jensen shift in his seat as the door closed with a thud.
Jensen watched him go, long legs eating up the distance in a hurry. He smiled and waved at a car that let him cross and Jensen couldn't take his eyes off him. Jared waved at the car as he reached the terminal doors. Jensen lifted his hand to return it as the doors closed behind him. He waited until Jared was out of sight to leave.
When he got back to his place, his palm still stung from where he had slammed it into the steering wheel.
Jared was quiet. Way too quiet. It had been over a week since he got back from L.A. and something felt off. It had started at the baggage claim in the airport the end of last weekend. Jensen knew he could have waited out in the parking lot, phoned him, and so on. However, his letting Jared go was still a work in progress. After sleeping for twelve hours straight after he dropped Jared off Saturday, he had been antsy all weekend.
Jensen had spotted Jared the moment he entered the arrival area, since, as usual, he was the tallest person there. Jared's eyes were locked on the baggage carousel and Jensen decided to just approach without calling out. He liked to get a look at Jared when Jared didn’t know anyone was looking. His hands were deep in his jacket pockets, hair hanging forward, tangling in his eyelashes. It drove Jensen crazy in both the ‘want to grab you by it and fuck you blind’ way as well as the ‘could you get a haircut this year’ way at the exact same time. That was rather the perfect pain/pleasure of lusting after one Jared Padalecki. He smiled as he got closer, tapped Jared on the shoulder.
Jared jumped, looking around before lighting on Jensen. If Jensen had expected Jared to be happy to see him, he was obviously aiming low. The grin that split his face in two and the hard hug he received took him totally offguard. And set him about three steps back on his twelve step getting-over-Jared program.
“Hell, man, s’good to see you.” Jared faced him, one hand still heavy on Jensen’s shoulder.
He laughed uneasily. “Only been two days, dude.” Jensen’s eyebrows lifted quizzically, wanting to take it back because it had felt like for-fucking-ever on his end.
“Yeah,” Jared turned and stepped forward to grab a box off the carousel. When he turned back, his smile had slipped, his face was a bit more guarded as Jensen glanced at the box.
“Just some stuff from L.A. I wanted up here.” This smile didn’t fool Jensen. He may have only known Jared for a short time, but it had been an intense time. A lot of hours, a lot of smiles. And this one was not right. But Jared didn’t offer any more information and Jensen wasn’t sure he wanted to know, so he drove him home.
Jensen looked up from the new script and at Jared. He still wasn’t acting like himself, but he was doing a good job of fooling everyone else. But when they were alone in one of their trailers, he didn’t do as thorough a job. Jared had a pencil in his hand, spinning it absently in his fingers as he read. He took up most of Jensen’s couch, legs halfway across the carpet, feet nearly bumping into Jensen’s. Jensen shifted in his chair, eyes still trained on Jared instead of the open pages in his lap. When Jared’s eyebrows lifted abruptly, he saw it. When Jared looked up at him a second later, he was caught staring. Jensen coughed , reaching for his bottle of water.
“Jen, you get to be evil.” Jared jabbed at a spot on the page.
“Page 26. You crack Sam in the head with a tire iron, dude.”
Jensen flipped quickly forward and skimmed over that page and those around it. “Oh, damn. So, I’m Dean and evil Dean...think I get paid double this week?” He grinned, eyebrows raised and Jared shook his head, laughing to himself. In the next twenty minutes, they discovered that Dean also had to strip both clothes and skin, and Jared conceded he was surprised they made it all the way to the sixth episode without flashing some Jensen skin. Then there was the small fact that they were both going to be tied up this episode. Jared twice.
Jensen rolled his eyes and kept reading. Great. Another fight scene with Jared. A big one, too. Why did the powers that be hate him this much?
The night Jensen shot the scene in their sewer set where he stripped down, Jared stuck around and watched, even though it was 1 a.m. and he was done shooting. It struck Jensen as odd, until he heard Jared quizzing the effects guy about the prosthetic skin Jensen’s stunt double would be wrestling off his torso. Jensen shook his head, half-listening to McNeill as he gave him direction and half-listening to Jared. Jared’s fascination with the tricks of horror was nothing new. His enthusiasm for absolutely everything they did on this show was also nothing new, but Jensen still couldn’t believe he was giving up an extra hour or more of sleep just to see some rubber skin and fake blood. But then Jared stayed through every take with Jensen, but left when the stunt double started, claiming exhaustion.
Two days later, Jensen looked down at Jared, not yet in character. “Those ropes tight, man?” His whole body was thrumming with anticipation of the scenes they were about to shoot. He was sliding from shapeshifter Dean and back to Jensen in his mind and back again, a transitional phase he always went through. Jensen was not one of those who said it was like flipping a switch to get into character. It was more fluid than that for him. He could taste the thrill of putting his hands on Jared and it was getting hard to tell if that was him or the character at this point. The ropes binding Jared’s neck, chest and hands gave Jensen random, dirty thoughts he needed to stow, since he was pretty sure this evil Dean had no designs on Sammy’s body in quite that way. Maybe later when the real Dean showed up he could tap back into those just a little. Just enough to keep things interesting.
Jensen cracked his neck back and forth and met Jared’s eyes. He hadn’t even heard Jared’s answer to his question. He could almost see Jared’s eyes close down, as he turned to Sam in front of him, intensity sparking. Aggression and attitude at the forefront, chin jutting upward in defiance of him as evil doppelganger. When he heard ‘action,’ this evil version of Dean was ready to make Sam sorry he was ever born. Anything to forget the sight of Jared’s chest muscles straining against the ropes, the way his jeans tightened across his thighs.
The next night, Jensen sat back slightly on his heels, out of breath. "You ever think we're not that bright to offer to do most of our own fights?"
Sprawled out on the mats in the middle of the room, Jared laughed, his shoulders shaking. "Yeah, man. But it's still fun, right?"
Jensen had to laugh, agreeing. Dan had really put them through their paces tonight, working out the details of the big fight between shapeshifter Dean and Sam. Jensen could feel the aches he would have tomorrow, mostly in his hip and shoulder from a few misplaced shots and knew Jared had a similar set of pains. There was a good reason they got the rest of the night off after practice sessions.
As Jensen looked down at Jared, thighs straddling his waist, hands resting loosely on Jared's shoulders, he thought he might just have the greatest job in the world.
His leg muscles burned a little from holding himself above Jared, his knees ached from kneeling. Jensen could have cared less because he had the heat of Jared between his legs, solid and warm. The only problem being that if he got any happier, Jared was going to know about it under no uncertain terms.
Dan’s voice broke into his thoughts. "So, Jensen, we pick up after the tackle to the floor. Lead with two rights and then you go forward to choke Jared. We'll cue you verbally to release and roll off Jared and into a crouch - there." Dan paced over to the spot and Jensen nodded. "And you, Jared, will be hitting at his chest and face, trying to break his hold, all the while choking until he moves off you and then you pass out, briefly. Let's run it through, okay?"
Jensen nodded, glancing at Jared, who was watching him instead of Dan, and that seemed weird. They were almost done choreographing the fight, both of them a bit damp with sweat, flushed in the face. Jared nodded, too, as Jensen leaned back to sit on his thighs, then dove forward, delivered two quick right punches, barely missing Jared. Then, his hands slid forward to encircle Jared’s neck.
After four attempts, Dan had to take a phone call. Jensen leaned forward on his fists to pull his legs under him and stand up. As he did, he noticed Jared watching him from his position flat on his back a few feet away. He lifted his eyebrows at him, hesitating. "What's up, Jay?" He stretched for the ceiling, feeling his back unkink as he did.
Jared looked away, smiling at the ceiling. "I wish Dan would let us do that tackle thing. Though I guess offering to break a coffee table with my back isn't the smartest thing, either." Smile still in place, Jared looked back at Jensen, who couldn't move now if he wanted to. His body was still wound tight from what they were being taught to do. Nothing like straddling the waist of the guy you want to get the blood flowing, so to speak.
Then Dan came back and Jensen got back to it, not needing to be told twice to kneel over Jared once again. By the eighth time, Jensen could feel Jared’s pulse under his fingers, feel it racing faster. He shifted on the mat, thighs rubbing Jared’s hips and saw Jared’s eyes flare with something. Something hot and liquid and obviously Jensen was running a fever because he was starting to hallucinate. Except on the next runthrough, when Jared’s hands were pushing at Jensen’s chest and he was driving down over Jared to keep his balance, he felt something. Instinct had him grinding down again before he could think it over and yeah, that was no hallucination. Plus, the sound that should have been a gasp for air from Jared had turned into a low moan. Jared’s hips pulsed upward once and then it was time for Jensen to roll off him and up into the crouch.
Dan declared them done for the day with a hearty slap on the back and instructions to hit the showers. Jensen straightened up slowly, eyes on Jared, who had his own closed, chest heaving in a mesmerizing rhythm. Beads of sweat ran down Jared’s neck, a few of them pooling in the hollow of his neck and Jensen nearly had to swallow his own tongue to keep from tasting the salt there. He took a step back, head reeling, hands sweating and took off with a mumbled goodbye to Jared, who was still on the floor, hands curling and uncurling at his sides, eyes tightly shut. Jared sat up as Jensen hit the door, called out a ‘later, man’ with a carefree tone that would have fooled almost anyone except the person he used it on.
For an hour after his shower, Jensen paced his living room, beer bottle dangling forgotten from his right hand. Condensation dripped slowly off the chilled glass, spattering his carpet whenever he took a sharp turn. He went over and over the day in his mind, trying to figure out just what the fuck happened. He knew what he felt on top of Jared, knew what he saw in Jared’s eyes. Jensen just had no goddamn idea what it all meant. A fluke? A weird reaction to the fighting?
“Goddamn it!” Jensen stormed in the kitchen, threw his half-empty beer bottle in the trash and swept his car keys off the counter with one hand, snagged his jacket from the chair back with the other. He was never going to get any sleep tonight without some answers. Maybe he could just invite Jared out for a beer. See if the thing he swore was in Jared’s eyes, warm and wanting, was still there.
He jerked his jacket half on, pulling the front door closed behind him. Fumbled the keys into the lock and headed to his truck. As he searched for the other arm of his jacket, his eyes skimmed the street in front of him.
Then he looked again because damn if that wasn’t Jared’s car sitting directly across the street. And fuck if Jared wasn’t sitting in the driver’s seat, head back against the headrest, fingers curled around the steering wheel. Jensen stopped, still only half in his jacket, rooted to the spot, heart pounding a deafening rhythm in his ears.
Just as he tried to decide what to do next, Jared lifted his head, turned and faced him. His eyes were shadowed and Jensen still couldn’t move, frozen in place. He wasn’t altogether sure he still had the ability to move at this point.
In the minute it took Jared to get out of his car, bring himself to his full height and cross the street, Jensen heard himself drop his car keys with a clank. He snapped back into motion when Jared swooped down to retrieve them, pressing the keys back into Jensen’s palm. Jensen accelerated back into motion, yanking his jacket all the way on, and putting all he had into acting natural. Acting like he wasn’t very close to having a fucking heart attack.
“Going somewhere, Jen?” Jared was standing in front of him, a little close, hands now jammed halfway into his jeans pockets. His voice was light and normal and if Jensen did not look up just then to look into Jared’s eyes, he would have thought everything was light and normal.
But that thing he saw in Jared’s eyes earlier that night, that thing that made his cock harden, his spine go rigid, his whole body charge with barely contained excitement, was still right the fuck there.
“I - uh - I was.”
Jared’s eyebrows lifted in question and he swallowed. It finally occurred to Jensen that while he was busy having his own personal heart attack, something was off with Jared as well. Jared half-turned toward his car, shoulders shrugging. “I - I can talk to you tomorrow. It’s late and...”
Jensen shook his head, stepped back toward his apartment. “No, no. I’m not - what is it, Jared?” He tried to remember that Jared wasn’t just six feet plus of temptation, but also his good friend. Something was wrong.
He licked his lips once, looked over Jensen’s shoulder briefly, a small battle warring on his normally easygoing face. Finally, he blurted out. “Sandy broke up with me.”
Jensen’s heart felt like it actually paused in his chest before rapidly sinking to his stomach. His grip tightened on his car keys until he could feel cool metal biting into his hand. “Fuck, Jay. I’m really sorry.” And despite all of it, Jensen was sorry. Sorry that Jared looked so tormented, that his eyes were telling tall tales to him, that this whole night was turning out so very wrong. “When? Just now?”
He couldn’t help thinking that it was cold-hearted of Sandy to do it by phone when Jared’s answer cut into his thoughts. “Truth is, she did it in L.A.”
“Two weeks ago? She broke up with you two weeks ago?” Jensen didn’t finish the thought, the question of why it had been a secret, but he figured he didn’t have to.
“Yeah...I - fuck, can I just come in? Unless you need to go?” Jared half-smiled, head to the side and just the wink of the real Jared there was enough to make Jensen smile right back.
“Oh shit, sure. Come on, man.” Jensen spun and let Jared follow him in, doing everything he could to psyche himself up to a night of making Jared feel better. Only not in the way he wanted to.
They were barely through the front door and Jensen had his jacket halfway off again when Jared started to talk, low and fast in the half-light of the hallway. He was still standing just five feet from the door, hands in pockets.
“I don’t want to do this, Jensen.”
Turning back with a frown, Jensen pursed his lips briefly. “Do what?”
“I don’t want to come in here and talk about Sandy.”
“Right, I get it, man. After a breakup, it sucks to -“
Jared was shaking his head the whole time Jensen was speaking. “No, I don’t want to talk about any of that.”
His voice was actually starting to worry Jensen at this point. They slowly walked into the living room and Jensen leaned against the back of his couch, legs crossed in front of him, hands bracing him on the couch back. Jared pulled his jacket off, throwing it over the couch and stood in front of Jensen.
“Okay, so. What do you want to talk about?” Jensen waited.
Jared didn’t move and his stillness was uncharacteristic enough to make Jensen’s palms sweat.
“I told you I don’t want to talk about it. I’m always talking, dude. You notice that?”
Jensen smirked up at him, “How could I not, man?”
“Yeah, well...I’m pretty much done talking.” Jared stepped forward and Jensen realized he couldn’t step back. And yet, his flight instinct was telling him to do so. When Jared’s hand came up towards his face and hung in midair, his own face twisted in confusion, the pieces in Jensen’s brain all fell into place with a quiet click of revelation.
“Holy fuck, Jared.”
Jensen pushed himself off the couch in one motion, hands diving into Jared’s thick hair, yanking his mouth to meet his. It was messy, he might have bruised his lips, but it was worth it the very moment that Jared opened his mouth and tangled his fingers into Jensen’s t-shirt. His next movement knocked his belt buckle right into Jensen’s stomach.
“Goddamn, Jay. Don’t you ever take that thing off?” Jensen pulled back, glared down at the shiny silver Texas and then lifted his eyes with the most wicked of gleams in them.
“You mean, like now, maybe?” Jared laughed and it was Jared’s laugh, finally. Free and real and it made things right in Jensen’s world like no other sound did. And then Jared was unclasping the buckle, sliding the leather free of denim with a soft whoosh and slinging the buckle and belt onto the floor.
“Aw hell.” Jensen moved forward, bit into Jared’s bottom lip, still grinning. “You sure about this?”
Jared nodded, pinned him against the back of the couch, even as Jensen’s hands fumbled with Jared’s jeans like he’d never worked a zipper before. Jared batted them away and let his fingers hook into Jensen’s waistband even as he went back in for a slow, lazy kiss.
His voice was pure Texas, slow and syrupy, sticking to Jensen’s skin. “Let me drive, okay?”
And that was just it. Jensen decided his higher brain functions were taking the rest of the night off. Right after he managed to form one more coherent string of words.
“Jared...oh goddamn...” Jensen’s eyes rolled back in his head as the impossible heat of Jared’s palm slid down into the front of his jeans, the pressure firm and steady.
Jared leaned forward, hand still pressing, pressing, pressing, until Jensen actually whimpered. Jared’s other hand hooked the unfastened jeans, snagged Jensen’s underwear and shoved. When they fell to the floor with a thump, Jensen tried one more time.
“Jay, we should - what the fuck - I didn’t know -“
So much for coherent.
Busy planting a string of light kisses up Jensen’s jawline, Jared laughed. “I was about to piss myself out there in the car, Jensen. I didn’t know if I had it all wrong. If you were going to punch me in the mouth and throw me out and...but damn, Sandy was right about one thing.”
Jensen shuddered as Jared’s free hand slid down to grab his ass. He shuddered one more time when Jared’s lips touched his ear.
“She said if I liked you so goddamn much, maybe I should be fucking you instead of her.”
“Jesus, Jared.” Jensen wished he could process all of this. He wanted it all so badly and now that he seemed to have Jared, all he could manage was incoherent babbling and frantic nodding. He dug into Jared’s shirt, pulling and tugging until it was off and over there somewhere. His own followed soon after.
Jared slid down Jensen’s body, falling to his knees. Jensen looked down at him, finally letting every last thing he had felt for the last three plus months flood into his eyes.
Jared’s face just kind of broke in relief when he met Jensen’s gaze head on. The worry, the fear, the odd sadness that had been haunting Jared’s eyes for the last two weeks was gone. Nothing remained but rampaging heat shining from those cat eyes of his, tipped higher by his slow, slow smile.
Now, Jensen knew a lot of Jared’s smiles. Knew the goofy ones, the happy ones, the smartass ones, the ones that never made it to his eyes. But this one? This fuck me smile? This was new. Jensen made an early New Year’s resolution to make it appear as often as was humanly possible.
“But you know, Jensen. I’m an old-fashioned guy.”
Jensen cocked his head to the side, inquiring with a look.
“I saw we save the fucking for a little later. Take it slow?” Jared’s hands slid down and around Jensen’s thighs, blunt nails dragging down skin.
Before Jensen could agree or disagree or make any real indication at all that his brain had just exploded inside his skull, his fingers dug suddenly into the fabric of his couch as Jared’s mouth slid hot and wet over his cock.
Jensen’s hands then flew to Jared’s head, fingers tangling in his hair. He could not get over the surreal turn his life had just taken. From acceptance to confusion to despair to hope to getting his cock sucked all in one night.
All the blood in Jensen’s body screamed downward into his cock, every nerve ending alight as Jared’s tongue dragged a trail of moisture along the underside just before taking the head back in his mouth. He bobbed forward and Jensen bit his own lip hard enough to taste copper. Jensen couldn’t take his eyes off the sight of his own dick moving in and out of Jared’s mouth. His hands slid down to Jared’s face, thumbs tracing the tops of his cheekbones softly. When Jared changed up the speed, adding a hand to the base of Jensen’s cock and suddenly tightened all of it, mouth and hand, Jensen’s knees wanted to buckle.
Before they had a chance, he was coming and he had the fleeting thought that if he came much harder, he might just pull himself inside out. As it was, the feel of Jared’s mouth still on him, the sensation of pouring down Jared’s throat, all things Jared-related had Jensen’s vision blurring.
Jared was breathing hard and Jensen was dismayed to realize Jared’s jeans were still on. Jensen’s body was flooded with calm happiness and he moved from desperation to downright, full-bodied lustful abandon. He was going to make Jared scream, is what he was going to do.
When Jared’s lips met his, the taste was salt and himself and Jensen wasn’t sure the night could get much better until Jared proved him incredibly wrong. Jared’s jeans were halfway down his body when he grabbed Jensen by the waist and spun him like a rag doll. He pressed into him, his heat and weight trapping Jensen between the couch and 200 lbs of Jared. Jared wrapped one of his arms around Jensen’s waist and pulled him against him, hard enough to hurt. Only it didn’t. It made Jensen’s cock ache and made him arch back into Jared’s erection, which was now pressing into the groove of his back.
He looked over his shoulder at Jared, whose face was back to being an open book. The words written there now would have made anybody blush.
“Change your mind, Jay?”
Jared nodded, throat working. “God, I want to fuck you, Jensen. Now. Right fucking now. I don’t want to wait.”
Heart threatening to burst through his chest, Jensen nodded. He had waited long enough, himself. He kept nodding until Jared exhaled, released him long enough to dig in his own backpocket for a condom and put it on. Jared’s hand reached around and wrapped around and down Jensen’s half-hard cock, collecting enough lubrication to pave the way.
When Jared’s fingers pressed inside him, one two and finally three, Jensen rocked back onto him, a string of swear words his mother would have thrown him out of the house for fresh on his lips. When those fingers were replaced by a cock that matched the rest of Jared in size, he nearly came dramatically and completely unglued.
“Slow, Jared. Slow...” Jensen breathed hard, leaning forward to hold onto the couch. He felt Jared’s tongue and teeth move up the groove of his spine and it distracted him briefly from the uneasy sensation of fullness, of this-can’t-possibly-work. When Jared’s fresh, open-mouthed kisses touched his neck, and Jared’s hand fluttered lightly on his hip, it did start to work and with a few testing rolls of his hips, Jensen was there.
“Jensen. Please, god, can I move? You’re so tight, so...” Jensen nodded, and with that, Jared’s hips rolled into him and all was lost.
The pain shifted to pleasure without much warning and Jensen was uninterested, unwilling and un-fucking-able to contain himself. Every drive of Jared’s hips made him cry out and he remembered he wanted to make Jared scream. When he found the right roll of his hips, he succeeded.
It wasn’t long before Jared was cursing and coming and pressing his forehead into Jensen’s shoulder as he did. After breathing hot puffs of air onto Jensen’s skin, creating a flood of goosebumps, Jared pulled out and slumped to the ground, quickly followed by Jensen. Ankles still tangled in jeans, bodies wet with sweat, they leaned against the back of Jensen’s couch and just breathed. Hard.
After they both managed to kick their shoes and the rest of their tangled clothes off, Jensen broke the quiet first. He started to laugh. A kind of quiet, wry laugh. Jared turned his head slowly, cheek against the soft beige fabric of the couch. He just looked at Jensen, eyes sliding over his features in a way that made Jensen feel even more naked than he already did. “What is it, Jen?”
Jensen rubbed his eyes with both hands before looking at Jared. “’ve wanted to do that since the day I met you, dude. Did you know that?”
The comical widening of Jared’s eyes only increased the volume of Jensen’s laugh.
“Fuck, really?” Jared shook his head, tongue wetting his bottom lip. “You know what that means, don’t you?” Jensen was still laughing when Jared continued, suddenly pinning him to the carpet under his full weight. “We could have been doing this for three months. I say we make up for lost time, don’t you?”
Jensen’s answer was lost when Jared’s mouth covered his, delivering a kiss that lasted just a few seconds longer than coherent thought. Jensen had already decided coherent thought was largely overrated when Jared had his hand on your cock, so really, it was all working out just fine.
And for what it's worth, Jensen’s answer was yes. Fuck yes, as a matter of fact.