Log in

No account? Create an account
.:::..: .:::..:
  Viewing 0 - 9  

When I was younger and first started experimenting I would always joke that I was asexual so in a way I think I've always known. But I always found myself fighting the idea because I thought being asexual specifically meant that you didn't experience a sex drive or that you weren't interested in sex AT ALL and I so obviously was so I was always like "Nope! That's not me!". I wish I had known back then that that actually wasn't true, that there are different variations of asexuality and that there is such a thing as falling under the asexual spectrum. I've always felt like there was something wrong with me because I could never relate to the majority of other peoples experiences when it came to sex and relationships. I would always get uncomfortable when someone showed interest in me or when things would start to get more intimate when dating. People would often call me cold or mean because I would end things pretty quickly with no reason at all. It was all very confusing and extremely frustrating. I would often find myself wondering when I would start feeling normal and when I would start experiencing everything that everyone so often talked about. Weather it be from everyday conversation or from watching TV/Movies. I always wondered when it would happen to me. Other's would wonder the same thing. Especially now that I'm entering my late twenties and having never been in a relationship I'm starting to get the question "Are you seeing anyone?" a lot more often then usual.
I've only recently started to accept that I don't care about dating. I don't NEED to have sex with anyone. I don't NEED to be in a relationship like so many others do. I could go without all of that and still be happy. I AM happy.

Then I came upon this website http://www.asexuality.org/home/ and everything became so simple.

I really can't explain how AMAZING it is to finally be able to put into words what it is that I experience and feel and why. It is SUCH a relief to finally be at peace and to no longer have that internal struggle.

Read more...Collapse )

Current Mood: relaxed
Current Music: Clams Casino - I'm The Devil

Oook. So, lot's has happened since I last updated. First and foremost: I BOUGHT A CAR. It's red and shiny and AWESOME and I love it so much. I got a super great deal for it and I couldn't be more happy. Second: My brother moved out. Oh, man. What a change. A good change! And for the better! It's actually gone really smoothly at his end and ours (mother, sister, and I). It's really bittersweet cause my brother and I are super close like BFF close so It's really sad to seem him go but it's also awesome because I finally got my own bedroom and get to personalize it and gain some independence! I've already finished DIY'ing my old dresser and night table and it's so prettttyyyy. Hard work but totally worth it. Third: A week ago I graduated from group! This is also something that is bittersweet for me cause HOLY CRAP I've come a long way and accomplished everything that I wanted to buuuut I'm gonna miss it soooo much. Today is my first Monday in 5 months that I don't have group and I'm feeling kinda lost without it. I've already gone and made myself sad with overwhelming thoughts that I usually would discuss in group but no more group, ya know. Also, my brother turned 29 over the weekend so just all of the things are happening and it's just so much!

Anyway. I'm really happy with my life right now. There's just one thing that's missing. Here's to getting that resolved by the end of the year. *crossesfingers*

Current Mood: tired
Current Music: This Will Destroy You - New Topia | Powered by Last.fm

Tags: ,

Pictures from two Saturdays ago.

Read more...Collapse )

I miss this journal. I miss my friends list. I miss the comments.
I'm just feeling very nostalgic tonight.
I've made two new journals after leaving this one and it's never felt the same. I could never keep regular updates. I would like to come back to this one and start updating again. Man. It's been 4 years.
By the way. I turn 26 in three months. I'm not sure what that means.

Current Mood: gloomy

All right, Floridian's. I will be outta here in 4 hours.

I am gonna miss everyone so freakin' hard. :,(

And I am sorry to those I wasnt able to say bye too.

So long, farewell, to you my friends. So long, farewell, until we meet again.


When did Tom Feltona get so flippin' hot? o_O

Tags: ,
Current Mood: tired

Here are the pictures from yesterday.

Read more...Collapse )

Current Music: hot chip


  Viewing 0 - 9