__robotromance (__robotromance) wrote,
__robotromance
__robotromance

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Honestly, I dont know whats wrong with me.
I'm not sad but feel like at any moment just the right thing could ensure a breakdown.
this season brings out the best and the worst of people. for weeks we build up to the climax of christmas and then when its over we crawl away from it faster than a crackwhore the morning after.
I feel like the kid in elementary school who still hasnt lost their baby teeth and my classmates brag about their lack of teeth and the growth of new ones. every single person seems to be feeling the "christmas spirit" in some way or another, and here I am not feeling this holiday thing.

of course mom severed all ties with her new job along with any hope for a better life about three days ago, but I cant bring myself to exactly be angry with her. She did work hard, really hard but I dont think she was ready for this change of work. mentally or physically. I want her to be happy no matter how much she makes me want to bathe with the toaster oven sometimes.

Im glad Im home now, no more wayne highschool. And Im glad nobody misses me because honestly I dont miss them. Theresa Daniels and Kristen (kunte) Mack have proven to be the only people I really need to be around.

as silly as it sounds I don't feel like a teenager now.
Im no longer part of the every day high school drama, Im not worried if any of them will accept me, I could care less if I were to surround myself with these people.Im not compelled to post 3984398 pictures of myself on xanga or myspace just to see what everyone really thinks of me.

I dont feel like a better person but I feel lighter, I'm enjoying it.
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