(no subject)

YOU KNOW YOU ARE LIVING IN 2006 when...

1. You accidentally enter your password on the microwave.

2. You haven't played solitaire with real cards in years.
3. You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of 3.

4. You e-mail the person who works at the desk next to you.

5. Your reason for not staying in touch with friends and family is that they don't have e-mail addresses.

6. You pull up in your own driveway and use your cell phone to see if anyone is home to help you carry in the groceries.

7. Every commercial on television has a web site at the bottom of the screen.

8. Leaving the house without your cell phone, which you didn't have the first 20 or 30 (or 60) years of your life, is now a cause for panic and you turn around to go and get it.

10. You get up in the morning and go on line before getting your coffee

11. You start tilting your head sideways to smile. : )

12. You're reading this and nodding and laughing.

13. Even worse, you know exactly to whom you are going to forward this message.

14. You are too busy to notice there was no #9 on this list.

15. You actually checked to make sure that there wasn't a #9 on this list. AND NOW U R LAUGHING at yourself.

(no subject)

You know you're from Florida when...

--You shrug off hurricane warnings
--You own at least five pairs of flip flops
--You find 100 degrees F "a little warm."
--You know the four seasons as: Almost summer, summer, still summer, and Christmas.
--There are only two seasons - hot and hotter
--A carbonated soft drink isn't a soda, cola, or pop ... it's a Coke, regardless of the brand or flavor.
--You've been permanently blinded by fat men in speedos
--You know someone who's been struck by lightning
--You're more scared of the freaks who live down the street than gators
--You're officially sick of Disney
--The best parking place is determined by shade instead of distance.
--You learn that a seat belt buckle makes a pretty good branding iron!
--You discover that in July it only takes 2 fingers to steer your car.
--You realize that asphalt has a liquid state.
--Your parrot can say "Hunker down."
--Your swimming pool experiences tides.
--Suspended tolls are a highlight of your life.
--You can't swim because your pool is full of patio furniture.
--You Know You're From Miami When...You check into a Hotel, call room service and have someone answer, "Ju espeek Espanis"?
--You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from Florida.