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Monday, December 26th, 2005

(3 SHITS /On Erin's Chest)

Subject:Merry God Loving Christmas Everyone and no one
Time:2:22 am.
Wehellllll, so that was christmas. SUPER. i got a PSP, what did you get? my psp is a good time, i think i will cuddle up with it tonight and sing it sweet soft lullabies so that it will never leave me.
but that's not cool. so obviously i won't do that.
My christmas consisted of too much candy, shmokin with mcgraw and josh. watching some sort of discovery before dinosaurs program, monty python and the holy grail, a little bit of tekken where joe got frustrated that i beat him and decided he didn't like the game, AND some cool gifts.
la la la. well...okay then, happy holidays everyone and i hope you all get laid for the new year. goodbye 2005.

Thursday, December 15th, 2005

(3 SHITS /On Erin's Chest)

Time:11:12 pm.
blah blah blah life blah blah blah

how i could describe the last couple months.... BLAND.
but i guess i should be thankful it's not eventful because sometimes that's just all the worse.
the end.

Monday, November 21st, 2005

(2 SHITS /On Erin's Chest)

Subject:Today I was bored.
Time:11:03 pm.
Most boring place on Earth = Orange, Massachusetts
For the love of God, seconds are minutes, minutes are hours, hours are years, a day a decade... I'M GOING MAD! keeeeilllllll meeeeeeeeee plllleeeaaasssseeeee... small town's aren't fun. At least not when you're confined to a room with people of your own blood. i must die soon. I don't know how anyone can hang out with me, because I can't stand myself. Or at least, the closest there is to myself which is my family. We are a retarded bunch whom need extermination.

Friday, October 21st, 2005

(4 SHITS /On Erin's Chest)

Time:12:52 am.
I almost completely forgot about this world.
Good to see everyone's guts are still spilled here. Every now and then I just like to get my fair share of guts. guts guts guts. Everything is better when you say it three times. Magical, if you will.
"what have you"
so lately I've been....oh, what's this? EXACTLY THE SAME.
so there's the update.
I don't change. much. Right now my goal is to find a steady level of comfort. So far, my odds are good.
call me. anyone call me, i'm bored a lot.


Tuesday, August 16th, 2005

(4 SHITS /On Erin's Chest)

Subject:so confused
Time:5:03 pm.
i'm not sure if it's a good or bad thing when you can't seem to get over someone as hard as you may try.
every other person you try to consider only reminds you that they're not him.
you try to convince yourself that that's a good thing, but your mind tries to follow logic and reason while your heart follows a completely different path.
i think that the heart might make completely ridiculous decisions but they are almost always so much more powerful and maybe that's why.
sometimes people fuck up. what can ya do eh? it feels too right.

Thursday, August 4th, 2005

(2 SHITS /On Erin's Chest)

Subject:I think that today was a good day
Time:3:35 am.

The past week has been weird sorta.
actually, not that weird, I should say somewhat of the norm.
Ty Jacob Rob and I have been hanging out a whole lot lately, they're fun friends. But the past couple days Rob has been completely in his own world of drama. So I've just been hangin out with Jacob and Ty but I love it nonetheless. It's nice to have somewhat of constant friends that you see on a daily basis. In the beginning though it just kind of scares me a little, because I'm not sure how long it will last before they decide they don't like me or they find better company. Oh, well at least I'm enjoying it now and that's more than enough for me. We've been pretty productive lately. I went to MCC today and registered for my classes. I've got contemporary cinema with Ty so that should be a treat. I've been dancing a lot since it started up on Monday. Yesterday I was ridiculously sore with blisters on the bottoms of my feet and went to dance again and sucked cuz my pain tolerance is for shit. Today I was double sore and so I ditched out on Ballet because I didn't want to make a damned fool of myself. BUT I'm glad to be back in the whole dance thing, I feel like my mind is a helluva lot more at ease.
It's Erin and I's last month in the apartment so if anyone is looking for a roommate or wants to live with us in a house please let me know ASAP cuz I need somewhere to live after August. I'm not sure if Erin will want to live with me again because she's got her b/f which inhibits the roommate possibilities quite a bit. Oh well, I like living with her so I hope it all works out. I applied at Dee's dancewear today and I think i'm going to give Atomic Comics my resume tomorrow. Hopefully everything will start to fit together and I'll have something that at least appears to be a life.
The other night I got a really weird feeling, it happens every once in awhile and I just felt fucking i dunno, weird, sad, weird, but Mason's dad called me the next day and we talked a little bit, I hope he's doing okay and finds something to help ease his mind as well. I really wish he lived around here, he's really really awesome.
i love pot.
the end.

Friday, July 29th, 2005

(On Erin's Chest)

Subject:So ya pooped on the floor eh?
Time:5:36 pm.
Well, I'm really really really broke.
If anyone wants to donate to Krystal's rent fund, I would totally give you a blowjob. THanks.
At least the small amount of money that I did have went to a good cause though. Being getting the FUCK out of this town. Rob, Ty and I went to L.A. to pick up Jacob the Savage from the Greyhound station. My car guzzled an unbelievable amount of gas and we ended up spending all of our money and then some on gas alone. I'm going to tell myself the story so I can remember some day if I want to.
We drove up there and Rob with his infamous confidence had claimed to know exactly where it was but actually didn't know where it was, he just knew it was "by the skyscrapers down town." Uh, okay, so we were lost in some desolate part of L.A. called Vernon or something, I have no clue, it was like nobody even lived around there but there were just deserted buildings and shit. Anyhoo, we called jacob and found some sort of directions and finally found it. He was so cute waiting with his guitar on his back and we showed up bumpin cuz we rule like that. The next mission was to find the beach, because we had to do something awesome while we were there. Jacob rolled a joint in the car and we smoked it. Then we asked random people at gas stations, and an asian told us where to go. Santa Monica is where we ended up and it was beautiful at night. We were right next to the pier on the beach and it was like 30 degrees cooler there than here in Gilbert. It was heavenly. We then proceeded to roll a joint of Jacob's really great weed from Oregon and we passed that shit on the beach. Afterwards, we all walked out into the ocean and Ty made a bathing suit out of a deflated polka dot beach ball. It was the hottest thing known to man. The water felt amazing and no sharks ate me so that was a plus. When the beach thing was over we started walking back and we see this bag or something on the pier and we're wondering "what is that??" so at first we stare and say "that's a bag" then it turns into "bag?" and then Ty says "person??" and we realize that there's a top of a head poking out from one side and Ty says "PERSONNNNNNN". great discovery. then we saw a fight in the parking lot and as we were walking away we heard gunshots and we kinda just laughed nervously and kept walking. Rob asked a homeless lady for change and him and Ty thought it was hilarious. Actually, that was pretty funny in a sick sad way. We stood around for awhile trying to figure out how to get money like if we should try to sell jacob's weed so we could make it home but we decided against it and scrounged up some money from my car and card. On the way to the car there was a suitcase just chillin on the corner and we tried to steal it but as we're walking and looking around we hear this fuckin lady just start yelling "HEY KIDS YOU'RE STEALING MY HOME THERE! HELLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! THAT'S MY HOUSE YOU GOT THERRRREE!!! HEEEEYYY!" bahahahhhahaha, it was the dumbest thing ever so we dropped it and ran laughing back to the car. Time to find a way back home, I called Andy Pyon and luckily he mapquested our way back but then the hard part was that we smoked another joint or two and Ty started driving fuckin 40 mph on a 65 or 75 mph freeway. A semi passes us and he just grabs the steering wheel all freaked out and almost pisses himself as it passed us. I took note of this so everytime a semi passed I screamed and freaked the shit out of him until he was going 30 mph and we all realized we should probably pull over. Baha, I've never been so high that the car had to be pulled over. We pulled off into a town called Beaumont. This town looked like something from the wild west and all I wanted to do was have a gunfight or a draw. It was the weirdest place and the weirdest situation. We all just stood around really high and smoked cigaretes and laughed at the fact that we were so damn high and sitting in some weird ass town. Of course jacob and I played ninjas and decided that's what Ty has to be next halloween because he has the hair for it. I was highly entertained by a fence as well. Paranoia sort of crept in and there was a point when everyone was like "okay so if the cops show up and ask us why we're here we'll just say that we are tired and this is a well lit area and that's why we parked here and blah blah blah" it was funny. I finally decided that I would drive so we could get the hell out of Beaumont and since everyone else was too obliterated. Well, I was too but oh well I had to learn some control. Baha, I just remembered that once Ty and Rob were out of the running for who would drive, Jacob wanted to "Ink a BInk" for it. I just laughed my ass off and got in the driver's seat. We looked at the freeway signs for which one to get back on and we thought we all agreed on the right way but it turned out being the wrong way. So we drove back towards L.A. until the next exit. While on that freeway there was a big fucking semi with metal shit all on the back and I kept staring at it like, damn, i hope that doesn't start falling off. So I'm looking and suddenly see something in the light from my headlights flying towards my car. A huge sheet or piece of fucking metal just flies and hits my windshield and I was so high I couldn't even believe it. I was just like "WHAT THE FUCK! DID THAT REALLY JUST HAPPEN!?" They told me to flash my brights at him to get him to pull over so we could tell him shit was falling off the truck but god i was high and i tried, but it was a task, and he never pulled over so i just kept way behind him and drove slow until the exit. When I had a chance to exit and turn around, I had to flip a bitch cuz the ramp was on the other side, there's nobody on the roads cuz it's like 3 in the morning and i start flipping a bitch to get on the freeway.. SO OF COURSE a car turns the corner ahead and starts coming towards me and at the same fucking time a car shows up and is heading towards me from the back. God damn I was shitting my pants as i turned, reversed, and just barely fucking made it before being hit from every direction. I think we all got a good scare especially cuz we were all so fucking high. I couldn't even believe that just happened after the truck incident. In the end, we made it home and smoked a blunt yay!

Monday, July 18th, 2005

(2 SHITS /On Erin's Chest)

Time:7:08 am.
i am so fucking bored.
it's honestly 7 a.m. and I'm wide awake. but tired? I have no clue, i tried to sleep and I couldn't so I'm not. Here I am. the number of people awake at this time are very limited okay more like none. ack. this weekend has been disastrous and way awesome at the same time. I can't say I remember all of it but I had some good times at Leighton's and it was nice to give my mind some ease. I decided that smoking cigarettes is just my stairway to heaven. i also decided that i should be banned from all phones when not myself. oh well. i am pretty sure i hit my head on something really fucking hard cuz i have it hurts a lot and i think there's a lump. i also woke up in a strange place and drove to del taco and took pictures with suzy. Suzy, don't ever let those pictures leak but keep them for our sake. funniness. Yet another message to Suzy, you are asleep upstairs and that rules. There's a girl named Cassie asleep here too. Kinda weird I just met her through monika and she's already sleepin over. she's pretty damn cool for however old she is. i can't even explain how ridiculous everything has been. so i won't. but motherfucker i either want to be asleep or entertained because livejournal sucks.

Wednesday, July 13th, 2005

(2 SHITS /On Erin's Chest)

Subject:in the middle of the nieeight, i've been walkin in my sleep...wait no that would be creepy
Time:3:53 am.
Mood: bored.
I am so dumb.
But, I had fun today nevertheless.
McGraw and Joe and later a Jeremy came over and we rolled a big blunt of chronic and smoked 69 bowls including the purple shit. yay for getting high the entire evening and monty python. the grocery store guy copped an attitude with me today. I don't know if copped is a word but it sounds fitting. Anyway, mean guy, don't go to the mean cashier guy at Albertson's, he makes you look stupid.
Um, I'm bored and way too nocturnal. I can't even sleep when I try at night I just lay in my bed tossing and turning until an hour or so later I realize it's not working. So, I get up and do stupid shit like this. Or read. I finished Diary by Chuck Palahniuk yesterday, it was pretty good, not crazy impressive but I liked it. Just started Garden of Eden, Hemingway, and so far so weird, not sure what to think of it yet. WHO even cares, not even I care to update myself of what my current read is. I am really dumb. That is the theme lately of me, DUM.
yeah i forgot the b that's cuz i'm dumb. i try not to be but it just comes naturally. natural dumbnicity.
i made it up, but you know what it means.
actually, i didn't really make it up i just put some shit together. more of a cut and paste of different words or something or DUMB.
i'm bored with my own thoughts. what do you do at that point? talk to someone else? uh... nobody is awake and i suck. self, get more not dumb. soon. Aieeeeeesap.

Thursday, July 7th, 2005

(1 SHITS /On Erin's Chest)

Time:4:18 am.
well, fuck.
This past weekend has been ridiculous.
I think I was half retarded for the whole thing.
xanax is quite a friend, but the whole memento state of mind isn't always rewarding. I'm glad to once again have complete control of my mind.
Takes intoxication to appreciate sobriety, right?
Just watched 'Saved' it was a pretty good movie. It's really late, or early, I realize now, actually, shit, it says 4:20 on my computer's time, although I think it's an hour off. It's probably closer to 3 something.
I love night, it is much better than day. Screw you, Day. You are hot and stupid.
Today...yesterday, I went swimming and cleaned/rearranged my room and closet including the dirty ass rat cage that's been chillin there with my poor rats inside. I'm sure they appreciate my efforts. There's a cockroach on my balcony wall, i give him props for climbing all the way up here so I'll let him hang out there. Much like Ty Bruce whom climbed up the damn wall with spidey like abilities to unlock my apt. That was super. Can't say I remember much of the weekend besides cracked out zach, some how changing my clothes over three days, buying dog food, Ty driving my car, and... calling a lot of people fucked up so I apologize to those victims of my stupidity.
I think the sun is rising... cute. Last night I had a strange outburst of emotion, granted alone, but weird nevertheless. I miss Mason a lot. I miss Dustin too. I miss a lot of people.
I think I'm wanting too much to fall in love again and not succeeding as usual which is never a good thing. The wanting to fall in love part and the failure, both. They shouldn't even be thoughts in my mind, I wish I cared more about other things but I guess I just want 'that' you know? everything that 'that' entails. Everybody wants it, it's nice.
There's something about a combination of the sunrise, this laptop on my balcony, and a cigarette that is oh so pleasant.
gee fucking wiz. Alright, enough of my jibber jabber and blah blah love blah blah sad blah blah crap. Someone help me out.

Friday, July 1st, 2005

(2 SHITS /On Erin's Chest)

Time:3:29 am.
what the fuck i just updated this thing and it all got erased.
fuck this piece of shit machine website shit.
to summarize,
kyle is snoring loud preventing me from peaceful sleep. that fucker.
matt and kyle were freakin funny in the drunken swimming portion of the night. great times. erin is awesome and she says things weird and it makes me laugh. Flavio's....stupid name, great food. That should be their new motto. And uh...warped tour was awesomer than awesome cuz I can say I went outdoors and got some sun, in your face, kyle. And thanks dj for the backstage passes, you're my hero. And thanks Aaron for the Blunts, you are also my hero. and that's probably enough. thanks bye.

Thursday, June 23rd, 2005

(7 SHITS /On Erin's Chest)

Time:1:55 am.
it's raining.....

this night is only missing one thing..

Friday, June 17th, 2005

(3 SHITS /On Erin's Chest)

Time:7:37 pm.
so remember that one day when i got fired?

yeah me too.

(On Erin's Chest)

Time:11:53 am.
So you dont want to hear about my good song?
And you dont want to hear about how i am getting on
With all the things that i can get done
The sun is in the sky & i am by my lonesome
So you don't want to hear about my good day?
You have better things to do than to hear me say

God its been a lovely day! everything is going my way
I took out the trash today and IM ON FIRE...

So you don't want to hear about my good friends?
You dont have the guts to take the truth or consequence
Success is in the eye of the beholder
And its looking even better over your cold shoulder

Im not sadistic...

I'm not suggesting you up and line me up for questioning
But jesus think about the bridges you are burning
And i'm betting
That even though you knew it from the start
You'd rather be a BITCH than be an ordinary broken heart

So go ahead and talk about your bad day...
I want all the details of the pain and misery
That you are inflicting on the others
I consider them my sisters and i'd like their numbers

God its been a lovely day! everything is going my way
I took up croquet today and i'm on fire

I've picked up the pieces of my broken ego...
I have finally made my peace as far and you and me go..
But I'd love to have you out to see the place...
I'd like to do more than survive I'd like to RUB IT IN YOUR FACE. woo!
God it's been a lovely day
everything's been going my way
I took out the trash today

Monday, June 13th, 2005

(1 SHITS /On Erin's Chest)

Time:9:41 am.
Happy Birthday, Mason.
wish you were here...

(4 SHITS /On Erin's Chest)

Time:7:45 am.

I hate these moods.

I'm in one of those moods where I just want to rip my face off or take a samurai sword to everyone in sight. one or the other or both. GOD. I'm dyin here.

Wednesday, June 8th, 2005

(On Erin's Chest)

Time:11:14 am.
If you can't hold yourself together..
why should i hold you now...

(2 SHITS /On Erin's Chest)

Subject:some old english lady just picked up puke on t.v. what an idiot
Time:12:37 am.
Mood: bored.
alright so i talked to myself a lot today.
it was funny for like A second and then it was just purely pathetic.
i love aaron and d.j. i could really learn a thing or two from them. my new role models. i think right now i'm at some awkward stage where i don't really have any best friends around anymore. maybe later...i guess i can wait.
i frikkin hate old english women.
my dog is a god damn slut, i hang out with my dogs WAY too much. but hey, they fuckin love me.


p.s. hope jacob rob and tyson are having a good time in the old OR

Monday, June 6th, 2005

(3 SHITS /On Erin's Chest)

Time:8:34 pm.
i am the most boring person alive.
me = boring


out of touch...
out of time...
out of reach......
start over...
That's no way to Begin.

my only friend
the end

Friday, June 3rd, 2005

(1 SHITS /On Erin's Chest)

Time:2:14 pm.
i was fuckin retarded last night, and god, i loved it. it was about fucking time.

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