__marcelo (__marcelo) wrote,

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Written for Betty's bad fic summary challenge

Not my fault. Hers. And also minim_calibre, who came up with a truly evil summary.

SUMMARY: A pink feather boa threatens to change things between Bruce and Dick--4ever. Can Alfred save the day? Warning: Angst and slash

I did what I could, but it sort of got out of hand. Sorry.

It was a pink feather boa in the Manor's visitors coat hanger. As with everything -even when it involved Dick- it would have been a mistake to take it at face value.

It was a message.

"Bruce," said Dick behind me. "thinking about accessorizing the suit?" I'm happy.

Bruce turned to him.

"There will be new security protocols for the Manor." I am hurt. "I'm elevating the default security position to Level 3." Letting myself be vulnerable was a mistake. It always is.

Dick looked puzzled. "Over a pink feather boa?" I know you are hurt. I don't know why.

"Everything is significant." You are my life. I trusted you, and you hurt me.

"At the danger of repeating myself, a pink feather boa?" You are being silly. Whatever you are smarting for, it can't be that bad.

"I think you'll operate more efficiently based in Bludhaven." Leave me alone. Alone is safer.

"..." I can't live without you. "Okay." I knew this couldn't last. I'll never deserve your love.

"I'll be in the Cave." I hurt too much to be.

"I'll be packing, then." I hurt too much to be.

A soft chime signaled the presence of a visitor at a side entrance. Bruce activated a nearby monitor, which showed a cute twentysomething woman dressed in a very bohemian style. "Your date is here." Everybody leaves me.

Dick leaned toward the monitor. "I have no idea who that might be, or what the heck you are talking about." I'm confused and lost. You are the only anchor in my life.

Alfred coughed politely from behind them. "Oh, you found Elizabeth's boa." You are both too stupid for words, some times. "I was afraid we were going to be late for tonight's function at the Gotham Theatre." I'd much rather go out with a delightful young woman than stay here and see you idiotically self-destruct. "Master Bruce." You are a grown up. Bloody act like one, will you?

Bruce and Dick stared at Alfred. "I trust this relationship will not interfere with your duties." I'm not entirely comfortable with the idea of you having sex.

"I assure you, sir, that I'm perfectly capable of having a personal life alongside my professional duties." Unlike, it'd seem, you. "Lack of practice notwithstanding." And if you two are going to have loud, messy sex at weird hours, I'm pretty much entitled to go out and have a date.

Bruce nodded and handled him the boa. "Have fun." You win. Let's never talk about this again. Ever.

Alfred took the garishly pink accessory. "Thank you, sir." Deal.
Tags: alfred, alfred fic, bruce, bruce fic, dick, dick fic, fic
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