__marcelo (__marcelo) wrote,

What in the name of everything holy have I just watched?

Is Batman Ninja

  • an AU? No, that'd have been a much less crack-tastic option.

  • racist? Well, yes. I think the local with the most lines mostly uses them to call Batman "Master" and swear loyalty to him, for reasons described but never fully explained.

  • an absolutely nonsensical mix of every known Japanese visual and storyline animation stereotype, with the Gotham players being mostly there as visual ciphers of themselves? That's the understated way of putting it.

  • insane? Damian has a monkey sidekick. Behold the mighty bat-god is a line actually spoken in earnest at one point in the movie. And I'm ignoring the truly giant, arguably spoilery points of insanity, although for something to be an spoiler it has to be a surprise in an apparently predictable story, and it takes about fifteen minutes before you give up on being surprised.

  • a glaringly unfunny, badly written, character-wise nearly worthless collation of animation frames? Yep.

  • visually pretty, if a bonkers hyper-pseudo-japanese style is among your things? I guess.

Bottom line: this would've worked better as "Grodd telepathic tech gets mixed up with Tetch's, some Scarecrow fear gas, and research-grade hallucinogens as the entire collection of Dick Grayson's old martial arts movies is uploaded into Bruce Wayne's brain, who has to stay sane through the ordeal until he can figure out how to wake himself up."
Tags: batman, movie
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