oh sweet heart, lets go prance around in the moonlight together :D

I always knew this wouldn't last THAT long.. so yeah. I feel quite a bit better. Thanks for all your loving comments and hugs from those of you who actually cared :D Anyway.. I guess I'm gonna be at my dad's again this weekend. Whatever. I didn't have plans anyway but I'm gonna try to get some plans with JAMIE because i have not hung out with her outside of school yet.

I want a drum set. (i wish..)
I want a distortion pedal for my guitar.
I want to play in the band that Amber wants to start.

It was an accident. I swear.
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say goodnight to me please!

The dream I had last night didn't make things any better. I woke up pissed off. That's right. And I went to bed at 9:30 last night. I never go to bed early. That means there IS something wrong with me lately. Umm so Amber and Jenn and Alyssa are all grounded. I cannot hang out with them. Fuckin lame. And I'm gonna be single for a long time too.
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depressing post

i think i give up on trying to make people hang out with me now. I think today right now i give up on alot of things. I wanted to make a depressing post so I decided to name it that.

I can't compete with you

Alright. So I went to the movies. With Kylie and Chris and Brian and Christina(sp?) yeah. It was pretty cool. The movie was alright. It was a lot better than staying at dad's being all bored and stuff. I had an icee there. I swear it must have been drugged or something!
Everything just started being all weird afterwards but it was cool! I walked over to Mcdonalds because that was where my brother was and I saw like 20 people i knew there. While i was crossing the street a guy stuck his head out the window and said "heyy how u doin?!" It was crazy! Amber was there that was awesome though. She told me she called Chris and she talked to him about me. I haven't talked to him for a really long ass time. I wonder how he's doing. I tried to call him but he didn't answer. So I'm going to call him up tomorrow and leave a message cuz i never leave messages but i really wanna talk to him. Amber said it would be cool if we went out again. But i don't think that would work.

Anyway, while my brother was driving down to my dad's i realized a whole bunch of shit like.. that all i have to do is go down 88th street all the way and I can find Starbucks and Walmart. And if we STILL keep going, we pass over the bridge i always see when I'm in town and I really don't think i had been on top of it until this day. And I have lived in Marysville for 15 years. What the fuck lol. Okay and I had a second big mac at Mcdonalds in Everett because I was still hungry and I was telling my brother how weird everything was and then I look outside and right when I looked a yellow balloon that was attached to a truck just flew away and I was like WHOA. He thought i was stoned or something. Yeah I'm so going crazy.

But right now, I feel kind of half sad half out of it. All my mind seems to be focused on is the boy that I like and one other thing but I cannot say. Yeah, I must be crazy. Well, I'm at my dad's all this weekend so I won't be on aim at all. I'm sure you all with miss me. Psh. OH yeah.
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    the killers

pity the trees that lose their leaves

I wish every day didn't have to be the fucking same all the time. It's like nothing ever changes. Surprisingly me going out and having fun WOULD be a change.. that is pretty sad. And it's cold now so I can't just go walk around somewhere. I got to stay where it's warm. And then when there is nothing to do, I sleep. How great of a life that is.. my god. I need a boyfriend. Boyfriends make me happy and give me a reason not to sleep during the day.
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