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[18 Apr 2005|08:49pm]
[ mood | horny ]

hmm, a boring monday night with no parents home equals pix of me running around the house insane...
and dressed like a dead nurse [i get off on this MUAHAHAHAHA]
[doctored with photoshop a bit, for extraaa gore]
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the weekend. stamped k. [18 Apr 2005|04:22pm]
ok, pictures from last night.
a lot behind the cut..
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last night ruled [17 Apr 2005|03:51pm]
[ mood | exhausted ]

oh it was great.

went to chantels and did her make up and met up with sean and then chris and heather and pickle.
oh it ruled it did it did.
me chris chantel and sean went to the block and we got bitched at and i yelled at the same asian lady again haha fuckin bitch.
we got kicked out cause well you can read it in sean's lj, skid or whatever.
well, then we went to red robin and bought drinks and played there.
oh, we saw fishstyx at the block, that was cool.
well, we ended up at chris's and we watched hellraiser which made nooo sense but well we didnt really watch it cause i kept playing with chris and heather and chantel kept trying to get sean horny or something, i dunno lol.
well, we went into chris's room and he put up his strobe lights and got out some alcohol. i had a few gulps of beer, but heather brought out some jd. i hadn't had jd before. it is so gross. i like it, it got me drunk fucking fast. i was so drunk, i hadnt been that drunk in so long. everyone was smoking (heather smoked cloves...yum) and the smoke looked so fuckin awesome in the strobe lights. we watched nosferatu and listened to rob zombie and oh it was yum. i kept wanting to shoo everyone out so that i could rape chris but o well. me chris and sean slept in chris's room, and chris wouldnt get up there with me in his bed cause i was so drunk. i remember at one point everyone was trying to take my pants off and gosh. well we woke up and stuff and we went home and my mom spazzed cause david told her i spent the night at chris's [omg dave is so weird sometimes] but we convinced her i didnt and she had this rant about guys and blah blah and w/e. i have so many pictures to post, but i left my cam at chantel's :[ well i'll post em tomorrow.
my head hurts a little.

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friday. [16 Apr 2005|12:25pm]
[ mood | horny ]

hmm, pictures from last night!
And yea, goon showed up, i was very surprised.
we all had fun :]
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oh im happy.
rubberball tonightttt.

i hope i can go ^_^


[15 Apr 2005|03:32pm]
hmm, so today.
going to see chris in about an hour and a half :]
well, today was ok.
i guess sean is invited to go tonight to dinos, i don't know if he's going...i want him to? i don't know, i don't want to say anything because i don't want any false hopes.
i feel really ugly the past few days.
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[14 Apr 2005|06:05pm]
today was greaaaat.
so, i'm making an artsy fag portfolio.
take a look and comment please!
[even though it's just gay photoshop?]
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[13 Apr 2005|06:08pm]
so chris got me to ask sean to hang out with him, so i did.
doubt he will respond after me calling him a limey (which is only an english person!)
but eh just a try.
school was great, lnch was great, especially afterschool with just me ash and dee.
oh great times<3
i forgot how much i loved those girlies.
some weird mexican old guy came on to me...ew...
gah it was disgusting!

but fuckin funny!
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[13 Apr 2005|05:19pm]
chris :]

[12 Apr 2005|04:37pm]
[ mood | pensive ]

hmm, school.
1st i had jeopardy and i won it for my team. go me.
3rd period, it was me and patterson and chantel.
they were being so loud, i was like stfu and we kept getting in trouble.
then lunch was ok.
finally found out what the guys were up to.
they had a bet (danny, albert, sxe, and eddie) on who could keep quiet from the girls the longest. haha.
it was pissing ash off, but i didn't care, i knew they were just being goofs.
chantel overreacted though, majorly, but she's on prozac and fresh out of a mental institution, so eh. gotta give her some lee-way.
i don't know, i kept noticing how down sean looked. :/
i hope he doesn't go and try something stupid...I worry a lot about him.
he looked so sad.
i wish i could do soemthing for him, but he just can't stand me, i guess..
so...it's my fault. if i wasn't so annoying and bitchy and stupid he'd start talking to me and he'd be ok and he wouldn't be so...angsty all the time.
chris really wants to talk to him, i dunno why.
keeps going on about him.
i think someone needs to whisper some kind words to sean, and mean them.
i don't think (well i know) that ash and dee don't care about as much as they used to. if at all. his guy friends have no clue (maybe jose, maybe maybe steven) about his life.
i was talking to ash and she was saying how happy bum's parents always were and i wa slike wtf cow cheese nuh uh honey. so it seems she didn't know him either?
does anyone?
do i?
He thinks so, I guess, or he did from that incident in the office; me saying i knew him best and him shrugging and shaking his leg [he always does that when he's anxious or sad or pissed] and saying "maybe."

i wish i could talk to him, i wish i could cheer him up and tell him how happy i am, that he was right, that someone would like me, that someone did find me. i wish i could tell him all my secrets again and i wish i could tuck our memories behind my pillow. i wish i could share life with him again.

i'm asking too much.


[11 Apr 2005|06:26pm]
hmm, so, it's monday.
well, school was good, i suppose.
i beeped rodger.
the guys are up to something.
oh well.
i want to see chris.
left school early, had a headache.
am soo hungry but everything seems disgusting.
bye bye.

[10 Apr 2005|07:12pm]


teehee! [10 Apr 2005|11:32am]
[ mood | hungry ]

pictures from this week
pictures of
the angel game
the block
dave's party (which was great)

there are a LOT of pics behind this cut.

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[09 Apr 2005|11:50am]
[ mood | giddy ]

yesterday was just...great.
had a pep rally, saw a cat fight.
after school me &chantel went to the block and went into everywhere store but hot topic.
later we met up with chris and heather and we were gonna go to mi casa but my mom called and said she was going to be home in 45 minutes so i was like ftb, let's go to your house chris. and so we did, and em and chantel did the old switcharo. chris's mom is screwing the bass player of china white, and he loves a couple homes down so she isn't home at ngiht,s he gets back at like 3 pm. we watched some random shit, like wonder showzen and OMFG FAT PORN LAWLZ it was sick i couldnt tell wtf was going on there was just rippling fat and dildos. so sick! then we watched some stuff online, this guy with salad fingers who liekd ot touch rusty spoons. omfg it was great. then we watched the original texas chainsaw massacre, AND OMFG that movie is so weird. at one point i was like OMFG KILL HER ALREADY! me and chris were cuddling on the couch :] he kept putting his around me and holding me ^_^ then like, randomly i turned my head and he kissed me and we started making out but then something on tv happened and i was like WTF!?!?!
Well, chris fell asleep (spooning me :])
then later me him and chantel went into his room to sleep and me &him were on the floor and she was on his bed. me and him started to kiss again and chantel started to cry :[ cause we were reminding her of ryan...i hate that creep, i'll skullfuck him. well, we cheered her up and she slept with heather.
so, me and chris had the room to ourselves.
But he is just so...sweet.
He didn't even really try andything. He accidentally grabbed my boob and he was like "im sorry!" and he kept cuddling me and telling me how cute and rpetty i was and i was like... :]
we talked until about 5 in the morning, and we watched edward scissorhands and oh gosh...I'm just like...teehee! SO happy! No guy has ever been so sweet and nice to me.
We got up into his bed and yum.
okay, must shut up now.
well, he's going to dave's party tonight ^_^
eek someone slap me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


[07 Apr 2005|08:06pm]
[ mood | horny ]

hmm, I'm horny.


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beep boop. [06 Apr 2005|07:24pm]
hmm, a few, because today was utterly boring.

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[06 Apr 2005|03:32pm]
[ mood | flirty ]

hmm, haven't updated with actual text in a while.
not much going on.
school is boring.
dude like what the fuck?
ok, so i'm on the phone with box and i here shit ebing thrown at my window and i look and it's julio, and then he points and i see steven, then form behind a tree sean steps out, tapping his white creepered foot. steven yelled that sean was sorry and that he loved me, and i was like...uh...oh...ok i love him too? when i wanted to say "i'm the one who should be sorry" and eh I've been thinking of things I could of said but I guess, I guess it doesn't matter because he didn't mean what Steven said. But ha, he accepted me in an lj community, shocking. I heard him tell the most horrible sotry today, I am not even going to type it out. But I fucking hate dylan with a passion, and if I ever see him I'm going to spit on him. if he still works at subway i want to track him down and say a lie saying something like, "he spit in my food!" or just complain so he'd get in trouble. fuck i hate him hate him hate him. It just...fuck I don't know. Anyways, today was extremely bring. just like eh.
I kept thinking of stuff. <.< >.> i went to an Angel game with chantel last night. we just looked around for cute boys. guys kept trying to hook up with me or something. they kept telling me they were in a hardcore band and i was like, i would care why?
i wrote albert a note, and i guess sean kept trying to read it. don't worry, it had like, barely anything to do with you. i mentioned you like, once, maybe twice, just in passing.
I had a HORRIBLE nightmare last night. I had a dream that Sean killed himself, omfg I woke up crying. It was horrible horrible cause in my head I thought he did. Then I was like, no, no, he didn't. And then I was ok. Hmm, I'm talking to much about that Goon.
Mm, listening to Type O Negative. I haven't listened to them since the summer.
Eep, I think I'm hanging out with Chris on Friday :]
I want to ______________ him.
I looked like such a hag today.


omgZZZZZZZZZZZZZ mel's a crackhead [04 Apr 2005|06:36pm]
[ mood | crazy ]

haha, okay day back at school.
kinda :[ in the morning but i got over it.
theatre was so fun!
Image hosted by Photobucket.com
ew, i look like really fat. yuck.
anywho, some pictures of san juan capistrano and
toilet cam.
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[03 Apr 2005|03:48pm]
[ mood | creative ]

Some pictures from last night.

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[03 Apr 2005|12:23pm]
oh, i am happy :]
i have to right an essay later i think...>.O
i am happy!
not escatic, just smiley
I keep thinking about chris. hmm.
I went to F U N E R A L T O M O R R O W.
I saw my friend Mark, I was like YAY!!!!!
He such a pretty man ^_^
There were so many hot deathrock guys, with their teased hair and oh yum.
One of them kept dancing like, with me and Dave. Haha.
pictures later.
of dave in lipstick. :]

[02 Apr 2005|04:53pm]
[ mood | ecstatic ]

My birthday was great!
im so happy!
i love my friends :]
some people didnt show up, but it's ok.
i stills lovers them ^_^
oh gosh.
chantel is a nut.
she manipulated me and chris into making out.
it was good.
i guess everyone said it was like watching a movie kiss, all slow and the like whoa.
there's a pic of it.
i got a lot of stuff from chantel and i got 40$ from becky and a new york dolls pin from adam and a dollar from fishstyx :] oh and angie got me gummybears and heather chris and rosie got me roadkill gummies ^_^
going to F U N E R A L tonight, im excited.
chris might go too.
ok bye.

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