ah, city life.  

all sorts of drama with the downstairs neighbor -- she'd like us to commit perjury to the State on her behalf, to help her get her preschool license.   oh, and submit to fingerprinting, TB tests, database registration, all because the DSS thinks we live in the same building in which she runs a preschool.   This is a surprise to us, and is not a covenant of our lease -- she just sprung it on us now.    The landlord says if we feel like complying with her request, fine -- but otherwise she gives a damn, loves us and just wants us to keep paying rent.  Says to ignore her.

We'd really love to help her out, but -- actually complying with the paperwork involves stating things like we're 'employees' of the pre-school on the form -- something that is not an option and could get S fired.    F that.   Also, I had a minor indiscretion in college - the charges were dismissed, no conviction occured, and it was expunged.   But the forms ask for me to disclose all of that: if i voluntarily bring that back into the public system, it negates the expungement, and affects my future.   Again, F that.      

The bad news is that (she alleges) that if we don't comply, she'll lose her license.   That's sad, and unfortunate, and we'd love to see her business thrive -- we love Waldorf schools, she's a waldorf preschool.   Screwing over a preschool seems like a bad way to land in SF. On the other hand, the landlord wants her to leave (for other reasons, such as nonpayment of rent) and we all know she wont leave willingly and SF eviction laws are tough.  if she loses her license, she's more incetivized to leave on her own accord, which is good for our landlord.  

However, preschool lady may be incorrect.   Just so happens that we've a close friend who practiced law in SF for 15 years, currently practices in Boston.  Her partner and she also run a daycare in Boston, with a seperate tenant on the 3rd floor of the building.   MA and CA laws are similar, and they've found a way to properly divide the premises into two, such that the tenant is not subject to all the DSS hoops the daycare goes through.  These are extensive -- kitchen inspections, types of locks, heights of chairs, etc.  its a labyrinth , but they made it work.    Of course, our friend is a damn good attorney.    

I suspect that our neighbor simply doesnt understand how to make it work with DSS -- but now that her ass is on the line, she'll have a reason to figure out how to leave us (an upstairs tenant) out of her mess (as a downstairs tenant).   If that involves forcing the landlord to legally subdivide the premises, so be it.    Its not my biz.  
 
Bottom line is that we'd love to help, but I just can't see a way to comply with all the requests without perjuring ourselves, filing false medical charges to our insurance (for the TB tests that aren't required by our jobs or medical conditions), or other legal concerns like stating we're her employees.   So... she may be screwed.   

This is gonna suck.