| no.space.bar. |
[20 Feb 2007|11:05pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 determined |
] |
i'mfeelingsadrightnow
andit'shardtoexplain
ithinkireallywanttocry
idon'tfeellikeiamable
totalk
toyou
idon'tfeellike
itmattersanymore
toyou
it'sgivingin
andup
andout
there
has
to
be
more
than
this
andithoughtwecouldbefriends
ithoughtyouactuallyvaluedme
andnotjusttherelationshipwehad
orcouldhavehadagain
i'mtiredofquestioning
myselfworth
i
am
tired
of
feeling
unknown
iamtired
iwillneverletyouinagain
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| ta da |
[23 Dec 2006|02:19am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 cold |
] |
i am back
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| writing 6 chord songs |
[24 May 2005|08:49pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
unfulfilled... blaming myself |
] |
sometimes the tears just don't stop
and you are looking for a
life saver
mm spearmint
what did i do?
where did everyone go?
broken hands for an empty girl
wings of dirt
i had a dream
that i was walking along hills
hills of snow
{i hate snow}
it was bright and warm out
no clouds
no sun for that matter
just rolling hills of powder
and i just layed down
my hair all around me
and i just played with the snow
let it fall through my fingers
and brushed it with my toes
it was comfortable
like being in bed
and i closed my eyes
and felt myself float up
i smiled because i knew i was dreaming
i just kept floating
until i had a rather
orgasmic
feeling in my tummy
it was like a rock...
it was okay to go
it seemed okay to leave
let's dream it all away
i miss you
now i walk home in the rain
within that 4 blocks
i will die
thrice
{how dramatic...
....i'm such a loser}
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| i get my ears lowerd tomorrow |
[03 May 2005|09:26pm] |
|
random trista qoutes of tonite:
"i like to paint my coffe with the half and half"
"i don't liiiiiiike birds"
"i have a car out back... jump thru the window when you hear me beep three and one half times"
"beep beep beep be- or maybe it's beep beep beep -ep"
"i hope the apple juice dogs don't get me"
"i'm totally rocking the 8 chords i know"
i am socially awkward
kill.me.
does anyone else ever miss doug... doug funnie... and the beats and and and skeeter and patty mayonise... AND PORKCHOP!??!?!?
:sings: oooeeeooo killer tofu!
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| re: update |
[01 May 2005|05:02pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
crushed |
] |
still not dead
and not going to see raspy either
mel is coming home
and i am a running fool
atleast i don't have to worry about what i am going to wear
it's almost mother's day and i don't think i am going to get my mom anything this year either
she kinda sucks
whihc in turn also sucks
sometimes a girl just needs a hug
a huge fuck off hug
hi tim <3
learning to play guitar
weeee-oooo
cookies?
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| update |
[27 Apr 2005|06:09pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 calm |
] |
not dead
going to see raspy
living with my dad again
hate my job
but definately.. not... dead
love you
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| i left you behind me |
[01 Mar 2005|06:33pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
discontent |
] |
i am swallowing myself without water and hoping i will drown anyway
i wish someone could make this desicion for me
i wish you would just take me in your arms and want to keep me
i know you do... i know you do...
give me the chance
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[13 Feb 2005|08:01pm] |
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no more yanky my wanky
the donger needs food
i promise to never let you hurt me again... like you did today
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[27 Jan 2005|09:23pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 indescribable |
] |
i beat you with love
and make you lick my ambition
i stared at you over my spinach
and you thought you were staring at me over your romain
|
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| years go by |
[23 Jan 2005|01:15am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
searching for more |
] |
such a pretty girl = such a pretty waste
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| i thought i was special... i thought you should know |
[09 Jan 2005|06:22pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 indifferent |
] |
blah...
that's all just...
blah
one day
someone will love me enough
to follow through
your words are empty
just like everyone else
will someone?
i thought we were special
i thought you would know
tedious
meaningless
empty
shy
frazzled
destroyed
loving you more
random random
i sat on my floor
nose practically to the tv
lost in tears
at your beauty
you are such a person
as real as me
you are breaking my heart
and making me fall in love
i hide them better now
because
they can't be yours
i love rootbeer
i love your soberity
i try not to love you hard when i am sober
all i want
is for
my wrists
to be
kissed
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| the year of change |
[02 Jan 2005|07:13pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 productive |
] |
so here it is kids... the new fucking year and i am wondering where this one is going to end up
i am hoping for much change this year
i hope to finally get the fuck out of here
and this time
i'm not repending on anyone
to do it for me
i'm tough
and i love you
i love me
i can do this
there is anticipation
for when you wil be here
and closer to me
near me
smelling you on me
my father was married on friday
i haven't slept this week
i haven't stopped shaking
i am more angry then i ever realised
i had a complete beak down
in the mall this week
while shopping for a wedding card
i held on to my new nephew
and just thought of.... you...
my family always makes me feel like
i am worthless
in 17 days
i will die
and i must
tell you
why
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| happy jesus day |
[24 Dec 2004|09:25pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
thankful |
] |
tonight at xmas eve dinner
my friends and i went around the random tables bean bags and chairs all sharing something we are thankful for.... and then we thanked the easter bunny
i suggest you all do the same
tell jesus happy burfday and then do something sinful
we don't want his death or birth to be invain
much love and the bestest holidays ever... get drunk!!!
xx.trista
i'm pretty sure i'm going to hell
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| bloody angel of snow |
[22 Dec 2004|10:24pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
guilty |
] |
so much snow
it means it's time
to slice them open
i have a new nephew
he is wonderful and amazing
i cried
my sister is prego again
it breaks my heart
for her
i have stopped
talking to people
and it's not because
i'm okay
happy jesus day to me
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| nothing like a new hole to feel pretty |
[21 Dec 2004|10:36pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
lustfully lonely |
] |
it's snowing a little
and i just want you to call me
you said you would call me
::::.:imissyou:.::::
i am annoyed
i think i'm getting a cold
my nose is all stuffy
i wish there was more i could do for you
my darling girl
i think i could love you still
need rhythem
need lyrical movement
need words and bodies
paragraphs and limbs
digits and hands
verbosity and the damned
what now strange child
what now lost love
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| i have a new corset |
[14 Dec 2004|09:49pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
predatory |
] |
i used to think i was pretty
now i think i'm dead
i lied to you
i love you
and i didn't think i could
think
about you anymore
now you are all that is left
you are all
you are left
pardon my skepticism
but i have been through this before
pardon my passion...ism
but it's how i handle you
pardon this needism
i am tired of pining alone
i wish you hadn't gone
i thought it could be brilliant
i thought it could be
but i guess it can...
could...
always be...
have been...
i am a fraud
i am fake
i am null
i am fucking void
i am a void
i am voided
i am defective
i am dysfuntical
i am destructive
i am destroyed
this is all stale
i am dancing
i love morcheeba
i love the benwicheven though i don't tell him
i love my origami girl {yAy for 6 months}
*dances more*
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| for now |
[08 Dec 2004|01:28am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
optimistic |
] |
tonight has been a good night
i love my friends
and they love me...
all.. 3 of them...
i truly am lucky to have them
i'm not the easiest person to understand
but they put up with all my bullshit
because they know better
i can't say the same about you
i wanted to write but i can't think of anything to say
other than...
candace i am constantly in awe of you
*loves*
hrm.. i know what i need to do...
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| all the boys and my sprite |
[05 Dec 2004|08:40pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 drained |
] |
shame on me
shame shame shame
i need to stop with the drunk dialing
i need to stop
getting ahead of myself
getting myself in over my head
getting myself in trouble
losing my self
misplacing my heart
and i know you are sick of me doing this
but...
i don't know why i always do
i guess it's my falling M.O.
and i wish you were here
and i wish you weren't there so i could actually call you
i woke up this morning
thinking of you
i dreamt of you
and i just want to know...
what you thought...
when you read...
what i wrote...
and i'm infected
and i'm infectuos
and i think it's you
and i wish it was me
i hate it when you say
you miss me
becuase you aren't allowed
you aren't meant to
i was told that i was just something
to kill the time
and that you would never
never
speak with me again
it's what she told me
so forgive me...
for not reacting when you say
you miss me
because honestly
you aren't honest
i know why you worry about me
you know i am pieces
you know how i fall
so this time when i break
put me in an envelope
with a stamp to peru
send me off
to be with llamas
and lost in ruins
i want to marry you
i want to lay on a floor with you
staring at the ceiling
just to get a new perspective
i want feel your lips
on my wrists
over the scars
i want your sentence to run over me
do you know
i keep you
in my pocket
and i won't make any assumptions
of how you feel
until you are here
and i see for myself
for now...
your words and promises are borrowed
let's fall
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| interesting |
[09 Nov 2004|11:36pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 devious |
] |
The University of Blogging
Presents to
violently happy
An Honorary
Bachelor of
Psychotic Ranting
Majoring in
Cutting
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|
Blogging Degree
From Go-Quiz.com
|
|
violentlyhappy_
flirty
