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I listen for the whisper of your sweet insanity
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| well i don't know, but i've been told... |
[17 May 2004|09:12pm] |
well
i
never
i have my first exam on tuesday, english and i am supposed to have read Alice in Wonderland at least 3 times... how about not even once. and then psychology on thursday, 2 exams, 4 topics, no revision.. looking good! oh and classics, hahaha.
haven't finished my art exam, hope they give me more tiiime. have walked around college on two days now with bright green hands, got some funny looks on the bus, felt abit sick when eating lunch with them.
sunny it has been, and fun it is in the sun, we loove the parks :)
other than that, it's been awhile eh, dunno just stuff.
i wish you'd stop making me feel like shit.
because you are. alot.
the sky looks nice
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| it is our function as artists to make the spectator see the world our way, not his way |
[18 Apr 2004|12:16pm] |
hahha this is me working.. going well so far then!
holidays holidays are practically over but they were good. mm let's think, fun was had a various places, with various people and lots of spliffage and drinking and it was all top until you suddenly realise you haven't done a single piece of work. And you try to work. you try but you're too hungover or tired so you stop and go back to bed/watch shit tv all day until you're out again forgetting all about it.
so yesterday i thought hey, yes, hey, it's a nice day (you felling teh rhyme here?) maybe i should go and do some art. so i got a lift to didsbury (train of thought: need to take pictures of trees, can't think of anything else, mum going past didsbury, can't be arsed to walk anywhere, will get a lift to didsbury, tadaa) mum said she'd wait around in the car so i could take a few pictures but it was all sunny so i insisted that she was being stupid and i could walk around didsbury perfectly well on my own... she dropped me off on Paletine road. I then walked around didsbury for an hour looking for Paletine road.. so off to a good start then. by the time i found it i didn't really care where i was and just wanted to go home. So i got on a bus from a bus stop i could remember getting home from in the past. Got on a 43 perfectly unawares until we passed through Northendon that this was perhaps not the best choice. So off i get in Bench hill somewhere near Wythenshaw hospital very confused. Rang Donna. Got a 43 back to Didsbury. Set off up the wrong road for half an hour, turned around, rang Donna who had given up trying to understand how i got so completely lost and came to pick me up. woo. I think that would make me one of the most retarded people ever.
wasn't in the best of moods before but this song has made me quite giddy.
i think a cup of tea before i look at the mountain of classics, english and art.
&thesecretswilleatyouupinside
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| saying the same thing like a synonym |
[28 Mar 2004|04:49pm] |
fucking stoned conversations when you actually work out the meaning of life and decide that technology is taking over the world and the Greeks had it right all those years ago, we are actually Zeus and everyone's entertainment. And the sea is so big and fathomless and we haven't even broken the surface, how often have you seen an octupus? and none of it matters anyway because we are infact all Sims in The Sims, and when we're awake we're highlighted and contolled.
Anyway.
Saw Lil James & Alex and it was like two washing machines, one with tumbling stoned people and one with drunk people and they met on the street. was funny and brief :)
I think I may have put my english coursework and questions, psychology booklet, classics coursework and entire art project off for long enough.
mm maybe not
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| had that engine running like a song... |
[23 Mar 2004|08:02pm] |
Well hello. I'm on my new computer, an emac. yes an e-fallenoffthebackofalorry-mac. Nah it's not, really. It's really cool though - I can make songs! shit songs granted, but songs all the same, with 'grand piano' and 'hip hop drums' and 'deep round synth bass' and stuff, well good.
reminds me of a pendulum, the sky is all black, there is this lone star at the top and the moon is like pretty far below it on a diagonal line and it looks like it's attached to the star and it's swinging to one side.
mmm i want to open this window and go and swing on the moon.
it's been a while really. it's a bit strange.
Trying (and failing) to do my English coursework. Instead I'd rather listen to mr. Jeff live. Makes me think of being on holiday.
I liked the sun this morning, when you're sitting on the bus and you're not wrapped up in some fuck-off coat and scarf shivering, you're just sitting there getting warm from the sun. Shame it didn't last that long
what you're dreaming of
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[02 Jan 2004|09:36pm] |
event?
well new years wasn't really an event like i thought it would be. the countdown happened standing in a doorway, but surrounded by lovely people so s'ok. well, that was the first countdown anyway, there were two more to follow cause it was the wrong time at first, drunk people and clocks..
got sober becasue i was trying so hard to make sense and understand why people were upset but then realised everything actually seems simpler when you are wasted, and you can also chat on and make people feel bett er without making sense so it was all alot harder and very cold sober. but it's ok because nice people were there and i like being with my friends however confusing/stressful it is to follow our drunken nights.
lost a few people along the way though and t hey would later turn up with no shoes or soaking wet having been on some mission or other
so it was all a bit of a jumbly mess but somewhere in the middle last year finished. and enter the neew year with two exams in a week having done the least amount of work for exams i have ever done. ie none.
inanycase i plan on getting so drunk i can't remember my name after them on friday so it'd be nice to have people to do it with who could remind me of it if they are freeeee
happy2004..
..well i hope so :)
we can't see clear
but what we see is a alright
we make up what we can't hear
and then we sing all night"
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| ordinary girl, ordinary waist. but ordinary's just not good enough today |
[13 Dec 2003|03:43pm] |
i'm doing a good job of avoiding work today. looked at random old pictures that were around and wished i was in them because i was usually eating something nice or in a hot place far away :)
last night was fun. i haven't written in this for a while so there are many other fun times i could mention..if i could remember any of them at all. but yeah, grand central thinks it's a living room with very loud music & bad electricity & brown shiny tiles in the toilets. it's not the Leaky Cauldron anymore, with it's big signs declaring it is The Grand Central.
i lost my voice last night and sounded really hoarse and silly trying to croak things to people, however whatever i was saying would've been drunken ramblings anyway and the person listening was too drunk to understand anyways so s'all good.
argh christmas is coming so fast i haven't bought any presents yet..
but Return of the King is out in 4 days, woo!
mm you're kinda confusing me.
i know you're out there, somewhere out there
mysisterishavingafuckingbandpractice.itstartedat12.therearecurrentlylotsofbangingdrumsinmyhead.e
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| dodgy blue |
[18 Nov 2003|07:16pm] |
art is becoming like a big blank of imagination and i've never had that before.
psychology is a big black hole
classics is a funny hazy blurry mess 'happy happy joy joy' tony blair is odysseus doncha know. i just forgot how to spell odysseus, bad sign?
au tumn is orange and brisk. but my road is bare and i don't like it, when you walk down the road after a particularly windy night and think what's wrong? then you realise the sky is opened up and everyone can see you because your leaves have gone and are now sticking to your shoes.
going to see Blondie tonight, i'm looking forward to crashing the Helen night out..
hey ya@
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| dissa-pear |
[05 Oct 2003|01:47pm] |
ok, let's start from friday. this is going to be so hard to remember..
oh yeah, friday was top, i only went in for classics. missed shitty psychology and went with nu&mell to chill in the park, english was cancelled, got stoned, went hulme hall, went to classics came home!well good.then people came round for some vodka fun, then got a lift to joe's and was just laughing at donna chat shit with my mum the whole way. joe's was okay, bit odd, very blurred..
saturday was some jenni&rachel adventures, no piercings cos no money, bit of spliffage, heeuge rainbow, lots of rain and a bit of a dance in a window.. ahem.then missioned to donna's, then mine, had spliffage, then again on the way to grace's, then went nuala's and saw people and fell asleep. woo you love it.
i have to go draw loads of vegetables now, hurray
i think you'll find that you are the fuck tard nuala, so there!®
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| i close my eyes so i can see |
[23 Sep 2003|01:21pm] |
i've not been to drawing for aages, it was fun, i reckon i should really start going again
we have cordless phones, argh! all over the show - upstairs, downstairs with their scary rings..
nuala blatently wants to do herself up the ass
a perfect circle were proper good, it was all over very quickly but yeah, it was well good
i no longer have frees with anyone, Peter's sold me out for art dammit! so today in my free i went to the Whitworth and looked at the Thomas Jones (i think that's him anyway) exhibition, which was pretty good :) i like art galleries on your own, you can listen to your music and wander round aimlessly
"don't be a mug"
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[16 Sep 2003|07:47pm] |
when you do that i don't know what to say.
i wish i could say i'd change it all
i would if i could but i can't.
i'm going to see A Perfect Circle tomorrow, i'm well up for it now, but i'm counting on grand central to wake me up after college so i can enjoy it in an awake state
fuck it's hot in hereh
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[14 Sep 2003|01:46pm] |
well you've changed your tune, and why doesn't that suprise me at all?
last night i had fun with bacardi, there weren't many people at grace's at all but it was good all the same. it feels like it wasn't last night, but the night before though
my mum came into my room to wake me up today to have a word, she got woken up at half 6 this morning.. then i left my room to go downstairs and escape, and forgot i'd blatently left a full ashtray and baccy and all the rest of it on my desk, oh well
it's nice and sunnyyy, but fuck it i have to stay in and read the whole english anthology and categorise each piece of text in it. and then learn 30 random places in greece for classics.. fu-un
someone left the Thrills album in front of the computer, i'm off to bob yo, tis proper summery likeu
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| it's time to bring this fire down |
[08 Sep 2003|05:33pm] |
it's raining and i have cold feet, which can't be good for the on ethat looks like it's about to fall off [wounds from trekking around Rome in sandals and then Leeds in old trainers, not a pretty sight]
i have no memory before wednesday. i do know though, that i drank vodka on wednesday, friday, saturday and sunday.. and today i very much regretted that. it was fun at the time(s) though..
college gives me too many smoking opportunities, i used to be alright during the day but no more! it was weird se eing wumni and mairi and tabby and tim and everyone again, weird but good. i'm gonna have to do some proper blending tomorrow, i don't think i have free periods with anyone, back to the old school days of the toilets i suppose
i think i'm going to go to sleep now, i'm soso tiiiredd
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[31 Aug 2003|03:40pm] |
eva's party was funnnnnn/y
i love small drunkern people (small she says? most of them are infact taller than me.. younger then) i got there abit late, not very i'll have you know, after a bit of a stress. involving not telling my mum where i was, and then bumping into her on the way back.. hmmm..
but yeah, as soon as i stepped in the door there were loads of cool drunk people, loving it.
then, on mine and nuala's second mission to get roll-up materials, having made friends with the men in Sizzler.. (mint sauce, go for it) and two scals, "whhhhy didn't i give them my number so we can get stoned???!!!" "because you are clever."
err but yeah, fun was had. and then some more.
and last night was fun aswell.. johnnydeppjohnnydeppjohnnydeppineyelinerrawr
and this morning i was rudely called "a fat dirty stoner waster".. twice. now that's love and affection if ever i did hear it.
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| let the handcuffs slip off your wrists.. |
[25 Aug 2003|08:53pm] |
i woke up about an hour ago and thought it was 8 o clock tomorrow morning, then got told it was time for tea and i was so confused.
but yeah, bit of sleep, bit of food, bit of cleanliness, bit of a real bed, bit of table and chair, bit of a proper fucking humain toilet, i feel so much better
mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
Beck and yeah yeah yeahs were my highlights i think.. was rather drunk for both of them but they were goooooood. and system of a down were pretty good too, oh and blackalicious
i can't ber bothered to write anymore, more food/sleep needed me thinks
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[20 Aug 2003|11:58pm] |
ok well of course i wanted to come back to seeee people or just talk to them
but y'know, others i could've done without
and cold fucking showers i could've done without
and.. anyway, i dunno, it's all good now, i'm just eversoslightlyworriedaboutthat
and fucking shitting it about results
but looking forward to leeds alot i think, woo
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[01 Aug 2003|08:42pm] |
i liked doing nothing with nuala today, it's been too long.. and this time it's my turn to bugger off.
would have liked to have seen lil, but alas she was nay in.
last night was busy and i got 2 hours sleep, tonight i won't be able to sleep, bugger. i've really fucked up my sleeping patterns, ah well i'll just have to recover on holidayyyy
kinda really want to go, get away from england.. kinda want to stay with people and chill
i swear i knew this was gonna happen, there's a heatwave in england next week.. just/my/luck.
but still, i can't wait to see Rome, i really can't.. this all sounds dead dull and slow, but i'm far too tired to make things sound good
me&my dad went out to get some music before, we spent hours there, walked around with about 10 cds each, realised we were wishful thinking and put about 7 back, always the way!
anyway, i have clothes to pack, and more importantly music to sort out to take with me
i have lots&lots of lovely books to take with me so yay!
seeyou in a long time, have fun in the sun and think of me at midnight tonight climbing into a smelly car with my family, then at about 6/7am in stanstead being very sleepless and bedraggled.. oh and on a plane at about 7.30.. argh
byebye x X xX x X xxxXxˇ
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| you.are.sleeping..youdonotwanttobelieve |
[28 Jul 2003|12:29pm] |
i have one more week.. well, until friday.
i think i've ad about 8 hours sleep collectively within the last 5 days, i'm so knackered.
thing is, i'm babysitting for my brother all this week while my parents are at work, which means i can only go out in the evenings now..
let me just try and sort out in my head what i'm doing:
•midnight friday go to italy - this involves a 5 hour car journey to stanstead airport and getting a plane from there at about 7.30 in the morning.. nice.
•return on 16th of august in the evening, pack and leave early the next morning for DF Kamp in Wales - have to go on my own becasue the camp starts on the 15th so i go late [what's new]
•come back from camp, possibly go to a party that night, get my exam results early morning and then get on a coach for Leeds at midday.
i'll be suprised if i make it.
anyway moving on, yay lil has returned, shortly to be followed by nuala who should be getting her ass back in town on wednesday.
but, i do think i managed the lonerness quite well while they were all away, i did have fun.. copious amounts of tea, cigs and noodles were consumed like true wasters.
i think i'm supposed to go make my brother some lunch now, haha i think not. he can detach himself from the playstation and make it himself! i think he's trying to sort out going out with some friends, yeeeah, then i can have the house back to myself. i've got so used to no-one being in except me, i want them all to go back to school
besunnyagain.
i tried living in the real world, instead of a shell, But i was bored before i even began, I was bored before i even began. ,
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[18 Jul 2003|06:20pm] |
this morning i woke up at 6am, 7am, 8am, 9.04am, 10am and 11am before i got up.
my head hurt lots..
Rockworld sounds like it would've been quite fun really but i did really need sleep so yeah. [getintherelil]
such a random mix of people at grand central, i mean loz and kim and everyone were there, was abit strange.. but good.
tonight i have been invited to a "cocktail party" by the Dickheads. i may go, not seen rachel, hannahx2 etc for ages, oh i don't know, i can't be arsed if they're all there.
toda y i have mostly been listening to the Jam, the Clash, madness and soft cell, i discovered this old cd with all of them on, s'well good.
i think i'm doing it again.. stop rachel. i can't fuck it up again.
well the brass bands play and feet start to pound, going underground, i'm going underground{
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| days away |
[11 Jul 2003|02:55pm] |
i wantneedneedwant a cigarette. again. pft.
i have been skipping around in what resembles a tennis dress today, drawing things.. hurrah for me.
i am currently being ignored.
my sister returned just before, got into bed fully clothed and started busting out galaxy102. i think she has been traumatized by the peak district in some way.
upon closer inspection it would seem that i am indeed in a very strange mood.
i like to open the window and wear a big jumper.
i was in a situation
did i wanna just take control or run
but i never checked my options
still just laying silent in the sun
Í
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[07 Jul 2003|06:05pm] |
do i: go to the smelly old ritz with people and spend money i don't have
or, stay in my smelly old house and watch Amelie but then get bored.
i wonder
i keep starting books and then getting bored halfway and starting another one.. i backtracked today and read most of the second half of a book i stopped reading ages ago, bu tthey all seem really slow moving or something. i need to get my dad in a good mood and go to Waterstones..
my sister's gone to the Peak District, hahaha i caught her and robyn tryi ng to steal some alcohol from my cellar to take with them.. bad move. it went out of date in 1996 or something, alcohol isn't stored, it's bought and drunk there and then here. then when i tried to be all big sistery and said she was abit young to be sne aking alcohol on school trips, lucy just said that was becasue i was sad in year 8 and then they laughed at me! the cheek of it! so i didn't buy them any. they did have some already though, little rebels.
sunshineatlast.
there is awasp, i'm going to run away nowt
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