| lust is stronger than love. and monster lust is unconquerable. |
[Dec. 24th, 2006|03:48 am]
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| [ | mood |
| | high | ] |
| [ | music |
| | the spill canvas - self conclusion | ] |
Crank, You See isn't any ordinary monster. It's like a giant octopus Weaving its tentacles not just around you, but through you. Squeezing until you try to get away. Try, and you hunger for its grasping clutch; the way its tendrils prop you up, your need intensifying exponentially every minute you refuse to admit it's being.
Waiting for the Drop, you know how you stand and stand and stand in line for the most gigantic, incredible roller coaster you've ever dared attempt?
Anticipation swelling, minute by minute by minute, you choose to wait even longer to ride in the front car, and, finally, it's your turn.
They buckle you in, lock the safety bar with a jolting clunk! Hook engaged, the chain jerks you forward. You slowly start to climb.
crank-crank-crank
Cresting the top, time moves into overtime as you wait for that scant hesitation just before you drop, knowing you can't turn back.
You know how you feel in that instant? Well, that's exactly how it feels when you shake hands with the monster.
No Time Like That First Time Fire! Your nose ignites, flameless kerosense (and some say, Dran-o) laced with ephedrine.
(you want to cry)
Powdered demons bite through cartilage and sinuses take dead aim at your brain, jump inside.
(want to scream)
Troops of tapping feet fall into rythym, marking time, right between your eyes
(get the urge to dance)
Louder, louder, louder gray-matter power shock waves of energy mushroom inside your head.
(you want to let go)
Detonate. Annihilate barriers. Bring down the walls, Unleashing floodwaters. Freeing long-captive dreams
To ride the current through arteries and capillaries. pulsing, rushing, raging torrents pounding against your heart; sweeping you away.
My Brain unable to shut down, throughts crashing like electrons, orbiting a nucleus of dueling emotions. Wanting to stay high. Knowing I should should want to come down and stay that way.
Before I Met the Monster Life had a certain rythym. An easy, downhill flow. Seconds, minutes, hours, days, a segue of perpetual motion.
But Now Nothing feels right. nothing seems proper but getting out, getting away, getting crazy, getting high.
It's Alot Like jumping into your own brain, ferreting what's inside.
accepting past failures, freeing self-destructive demons.
forgiving yourself and those you love, and even those you despise. at least for now.
Have you ever once in your life reached out to touch infinity? |
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