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WHY, THAT'S DELIGHTFUL! - January 9th, 2007
Graham Linehan's Hompendium of Dorithies.
Not funny, but there's a punchline
Try them or let them go. Part Deux.

"Solitary confinement is but a single aspect of the torture that
Bisher endures on a daily basis. While in isolation, Bisher has been
constantly subjected to severe temperature extremes and other sensory
torments, many of which are part of a sleep deprivation program that
never abates. Frequently, Bisher's cell is unbearably cold because the
air conditioning is turned up to the maximum. Sometimes, his captors
take his orange jumpsuit and sheet, leaving him only in his shorts. For
a week at a time, Bisher constantly shivers and is unable to sleep
because of the extreme cold. Once, when Bisher attempted to warm
himself by covering himself with his prayer rug, one of the few
"comfort items" permitted to him, his guards removed it for "misuse".
On other occasions, the heat is allowed to become so unbearable that
breathing is difficult and labored. For a week at a time, all Bisher
can do is lie completely still, sweat pouring off his body during the
day when the Cuban heat can reach 100 degrees Fahrenheit, and the
temperature inside Camp V is even higher.


Bisher is allowed no contact with fellow prisoners. Bright lights
are kept on 24 hours a day. Bisher is given 15 sheets of toilet paper
per day, but because he used his sheets to cover his eyes to help him
to sleep, his toilet paper - considered another comfort item by his
beneficent constabulary - has been removed for "misuse". Accordingly,
he is no longer receives his daily ration of 15 sheets of toilet paper.
Imagine being in the position of having to make a choice between using
your tiny allotment of toilet paper for the purpose for which it was
intended or using it to sleep, and then having it removed altogether."

The punchline? The guy worked for MI5. Yup, this is his reward for helping The War on Terror.

You know what? This isn't a War on Terror. This is terror.

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Name: Graham
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