| Dare to be a doctor! |
[Oct. 22nd, 2008|09:18 am] |
Weekend.
I had a really extended week off between job assignments. I worked the previous weekend and my next schedule assignment was this Monday. Anyway, during that time I spent doing some winter cleaning. There were some artwork for The Grade School Gallery ( http://www.freewebs.com/thegradeschoolgallery/index.htm) Ada wanted me to check out. However, I had to remind her that I'm only on as Research and Development.
We took a break Wednesday October 15 and went out to see Death Note II: the last name. It was rather interesting watching it dubbed after completing the anime and manga with the kiddos and husband O. I enjoyed it again.
I saw the film last year during the release in the original Japanese. It was a little different for me then, because I had no experience with the manga, the anime etc. Drinking sake in the company of others who were quite familiar with the piece, I didn't have the brains to be embarrassed before the director of the film at that time. Everyone was gracious then and quite eager to get me interested then. I was so skeptical, as I was really at that release party for the games and the short films from Japan. In the end, I was seduced by them and became a fan too.
Back on schedule for the remaining week. I did some copyediting in a half hearted way. Then their were the tutorials with Pod in physics.
Saturday, the family spent the day at the Westchester county center at a seminar for students interested in pursing medicine for study. Ada's middle school councelor had extended an invite. Ada wants to be a veterinarian. So, she also brought Pod an invite too, since her sister wants to study neuroscience in the field of vet medicine. I just go along for the ride.
I sign off on these things, but its never enough. Ada and Pod want me to go to. So, I take husband O and Jr. There was some confusion, but in the end everything worked out. The keynote speakers of the 8:30pm- 3pm event were the The Three Doctors (http://threedoctors.com/) who made a pact with one another to become doctors.
Well, that's enough for now. Next time! |
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| Manga Collector Charged with possesing Manga Ordered from Japan |
[Oct. 11th, 2008|02:00 pm] |
The Comic Book Legal Defense Fund joined with United Defense Group to defend a manga collector Christopher Hadley of Iowa who is charged with allegedly possessing obscene manga.
Without knowing much of the detail of this particular case, the gist is more about precedent being set where the U.S. Municipalities are chasing after collectors of manga art and charging with crimes of obscenity. Also, First Amendment rights should be considered. Share the article and discuss.
http://www.icv2.com/articles/news/13486.html
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| Hungry!! |
[Oct. 4th, 2008|09:34 pm] |
We're wrapping up the evening. Husband O and the girls are playing "The Suffering" on Xbox. I'm taking a few minutes for my self and wondering just when my appetite will return to normal.
I'm so hungry! Damn you B-100 complex and naicin! I eat and gain no satisfaction. Ugh. However, I have a ton of energy.
Gluten/dairy free pasta with sauteed shrimp in stewed tomato and basil sauce. That was all I had for a meal today. Husband O prepared it after we ran our errands at Costco and Stop & Shop. I had some gluten/dairy free gourmet lemon wafers and some other really tasty cookies chocolate chip and almond cranberry. A banana. Too much potassium, I'm probably going to have a really nasty headache at this rate.
I was on duty last night so I finished up some Fruits Basket on DVD with O before we fell asleep. I had every intention to stay awake and go to chess club with the girls. But after a plate of steamed veggies with black bean garlic sauce and a few bites of sticky rice, I was a goner. The offspring never bothered us. They already staged their stuffed animals for play and had Neopets on standby with whatever other games they played on the PS2.
I didn't dream.
When I woke up I ate sunflower seeds and chatted everyone up on their goals. Ada nursed some kind of gross cough she picked up from school as she walked around with a bandanna tied around her mouth. She clutched a personal sized bottle of hand sanitizer and disposable facial tissue whenever she moved around. I couldn't help but laugh.
"I don't want to share this with you guys." She grinned back at me.
I was totally distracted and wanted to hurry back to my room and get a few pages in on the current assignment. But when I reached my room I just spaced out and eventually dozed back off.
When O woke we began watching a Chinese period movie. Its staged during the great war that unified China under the Qin. Oh, its so dramatic and the mandarin is so beautiful to listen to.
Jr. was full of hugs for me when I returned home from our errands.
"In the morning, make the special pancakes...please?" He asked.
"Oh, you don't want the frozen waffles?"
"I like the special pancakes...in the morning."
"Ok. In the morning I will make the special pancakes."
::Hugs::
He's a good kid. I will make the gluten free pancakes in the morning when I wake up.
Good night |
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| Spending |
[Oct. 3rd, 2008|05:20 pm] |
I worked out quite a bit yesterday. I've allowed the gym memberships to expire since we have our free weights and a treadmill. I went to the gym for the treadmill, so that has become an unnecessary bill. I felt quite energetic and I'm very thrilled with the change.
Last week, I went to the New York Anime festival. Only for the opening day, since we were on duty for the weekend. After amassing quite a few acquisitions and watching wonderfully entertaining cosplay, I reflected on the state of the world economy and personal economy. Then I did what an obsessed fan does and went out and bought me some anime from Bestbuy! I ordered tickets for Manga Next and film screening tickets for Deathnote 2: the last name.
Ok, so I just lost gods no how much money in the 401k, so superficially, I could justify my spending on supporting economic interests. All things pop-culture!
Well, its not gratuitious spending, I actually have a cap on my spending. Husband O bought the series Mezzo and an anime works bonus release of Kite and Mezzo. I picked up some leftover Geneon releases, Hellsing Ultimate IV. (I am reminded that my Hellsing collection is incomplete). I also picked up Fruits Basket for the kiddos. Over the summer my girls and my niece decided to raid my all ages and 13+ manga selections. They have been very polite and patient with waiting to read the series. However, they've only achieved to volume 3 of tokyopops release. The next one is due out sometime this month. Anyway, funimations dvd release vol. 1 is now being consumed by them.
Today, I got most of my work done before 6am. Then I supervised until all the kids and their classmates cleared out of our home. Dexter, our youngest and largest cat was having a meltdown and had to be separated from the other cats. I wanted to sleep the rest of the morning until 12pm or 1pm without listening to him bully the other cats. I put him in the bathroom. He's a dextrous cat, he can pick up paw sized objects and through them around. I released him from his timeout and found an entire roll of toilet paper unraveled and placed elegantly into the toilet bowl!
"Well, can I get you to flush this, blondie!" I told Dexter.
The blondie purrs and meows to show me how screwed I was. I ignored him and plunged the mess down the toilet and hoped it wouldn't over flow. It all flushed safely.
Tonight, I'm on duty. Woot!
Next time. |
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| Welcome back |
[Oct. 2nd, 2008|01:07 pm] |
Oh boy, its been nearly half a year since I posted!
Well, that's all good. I've kept up with everyone on the blogs that I follow as usual. Commenting here and there. However, for the most part, Ive been quite busy. Parenting, teaching, research and writing/editing. Well, there's my part-time work that I do to escape the other stuff. Yeah, I use my part-time job on a cardiac floor to escape from the other more curious shit in my life.
Changes there are some and there are some things that have remained quite the same.
I'm still a foul mouthed person, though less so because I speak out loud less often. But it comes out in my editing, it comes out in my notes. In my head, it I have a long and short list of profanities and sketched out diatribes that are just sinful to and adulterous to the more noble of ears.
My silence of late was self-imposed. Too much stimulation was making me quite numb. I self reflected and threw myself into my work. So, as usual, I don't go into the part-time job anymore than I'm contracted to. I allowed myself to embrace other contracts on various research projects. Other times, I have allowed the children to dominate my time and knowledge. Well, it wasn't unstructured.
For our son, who is autistic, I fine tuned his nutrition, activities, and behavior mods to reflect a low incidence of temper tantrums and a higher incidence of more appropriate social/emotional displays. The eldest girl, Ada continued with her publications and over the summer attended various symposium, interview, and meetings with working professional artists and local administrators to figure out how she would stay doing what she likes. The youngest, Pod, I got to watch her, learn from her how she wants to have creative fun. Much of her interests have been on-line and pc gaming. So, I seeded her with some hacks for some of her existing games, and let her try her hand at some of the simple programming tools for gaming design I had lying around the house. She expressing curiosities, nothing solid but she does like building things. Next month she will work on building a telephone. I want to see if she can make the thing work.
When I think back to what we have done over the past few months, we didn't travel much. Money is tight everywhere and I'm phobic about credit cards. The only OPM's I can tolerate is a car note and mortgage. Most, of my outings were movies, theater, and convention type affairs. Video gaming exhibitions, museum, private gallery shows and film festivals. Those were the categories of entertainment for the last few months.
One month, I spent sick for three of four weeks. Hospitalized for a few hours and on bedrest for acute respiritory arrest. Hahaha, I was almost put on the vent. Then I had an infection because the medication severely retarded my immune system. I was able to do some copyedit work and some quality control for digital media while convelascent However, there was nothing I felt I wanted to do long term. I'm an bohemian when it comes to this. I may do a lot of work for free or charge a lot money for a small assignment. Its not uncommon for me to pursue an artist or designer for the experience of collaboration where I work like I'm in love. Yet, the next proposal from the same group will result in my total lack of interest where I turn it down for apparently "no good reason." I'm unreliable, take it or leave it. I don't care. I do what I love and I love to be free. Restraining me is a life or death situation for me.
There are a lot of pictures. I was very camera happy. Maybe I will share some.
Yeah, I think I will since I'm no longer on a media blackout to social networks.
Now, let us laugh. This is a ringtone on husband O's phone. I'm sure it freaks out his patients when they hear it.
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| Its been a while |
[May. 9th, 2008|10:51 pm] |
I wonder how many people I have lost for my hiatus from making posts. Granted, I have been reading everyone else post, though I often save my comments for self reflection. I can hardly believe that is is May! How about that, another Mother's day, another spring, another summer to bloom. It has been quite an exciting time for us here.
Well, I want to start out my journal in a refreshing way, embracing much of the interests I have been indulging in lately. Its all been about the pursuit of peace, exploring my intellectual pursuits and sharing it with my pre-teens and teens. I do go with the flow of life these days and while I am no expert, I learn something about myself and life everyday.
Some things to update. Since the last time I added a note here I've been quite busy taking two children to formal galas where one child served as Mistress of Ceremony while her older sister gave a speech in mandarin. At another time, I am coordinating with one child to continue her mandarin studies with her teacher. A television shoot then makes its way into our lives and I find myself shuttling the one child to this, thankfully the shoot was able to be done in one take. She's a real pro when she's on the job. However, I make sure I have plenty of entertainment for myself, palm, digital cam, handy dandy spiritual book, and a snack.
Then the oldest daughter announces she wishes to start her own magazine. As a good mother and mentor I told her to do her research etc. She does and comes back with a proposal that made more sense than I've heard from adults committed to throwing their entire life away. Go for it and see where it takes you. A couple weeks pass, she works her networks for capital, sponsors and flirts with advertisers. She solicits for submissions and goes to town at acquiring an email, designing her website, and finding a printer. She secures her capital, a digital camera, and lots of advice.
"I'm riding shotgun, to her..." I find myself saying when adults think they can talk to me to get to her. "No, its all her. Please, don't hesitate because I'm here."
I have no ambition. Ada's got more than enough for an army.
A week later we make it to meet with a manga artist giving workshops in NYC public Library, then we make it to the comic con. We stay for a couple of workshops where she meets with a comic artist paneling for the Museum of Comic and Comic Art (MoCCA), and Jimmy Gownley creator of Amelia rules. Ada's young, 11 at the time full of fire and doesn't know the practice of moderation. She's good, she networks enviably.
The week follows that she's tabling at a local flea market to sell her new mini-comics "Cats Vs. Mice"
"I'm glad I learned to keep my art, I want to show it to other artists to get their advice and stuff." She said to me it was one of those many moments when we're sitting in my bed watching the recorded anime from the DVR.
"As long as you're having fun, sweetie." I remind her as I brush my fingers along the rows of braids on her head. She can be like a kitten.
"But girl, you can work a mother to the bone. I swear dealing with you and your sibs is a job all by itself."
Yesterday, was the opening of the Student art gallery at the Mount Vernon Library. We made our way to that, only to be surprised that my son had work on display. That was really nice to see.
"Mom, get pictures for me for my magazine." Ada whispers. She had rushed over while she and her sister were doing their laundry.
"Yeah, I got you." I laughed.
Today, was a workshop with the cartoonist Jerry Craft creator of "Momas Boyz," at the mt. Vernon Boys and Girls Club. This time I got to run in between doing my laundry. But it was fun.
"Don't forget to take pictures...you space out a lot." I said.
"You're not going with me?" She asked.
"I'll meet you there, you're 12, practice getting around on your own. Call me, let me know when you get there." I say. Its the kind of thing you do as a parent when you nudge the fledglings onward. Its time. Yet, I will be sensitive, play this by ear just how much space I give her. Encourage her to take her space too, yes.
She did great. I was happy for her that she got to meet with and work with another professional artist, reinforce the business end on her research to publishing her own magazine and mini-comics.
I was wet too. I always hate being wet.
You know, my work for pay on a critical nursing unit is rewarding yet less work than managing three exceptional children.
Wanna switch with me for five hours a week?
Ciao, Next time.
  Cartoonist, Jerry Craft "Mamas Boyz"
 Sakile (Ada) with mangaka Misako Rocks! (Jr. in the background)
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| In Love |
[Feb. 21st, 2008|11:55 pm] |
| [ | Tags | | | love | ] |
| [ | mood |
| |  apathetic | ] |
I have a blessed life. Oh, its not an easy one. Yet, I can wake up nearly every moment in my day and truly love myself. Its usually a pleasure to share a little of my life with others. Even when others do hurt me directly, or my witness to their suffering hurts me.
I can die at any moment and know, I do not have regrets.
I have achieved most of what I wanted: A life without regret. Love without conditions. Respect for self and others, however they are.
Loving humans is the hardest thing in the world. Loving myself makes it so much easier to love everyone else.
I love you.
The meta-you that's humanity, and having come full circle with that...now the bigger tasks begin.
Yes. |
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| When Peace is Our one Salvation |
[Feb. 18th, 2008|09:43 pm] |
Solitude.
Meditation.
My one solid change in this new era of my lifespan has become the pursuit of peace. There is small peace, large peace and then there is universal peace. When I decided to pursue peace as amorously as I have pursued lovers, so much has come to me quite easy. However, it is painful.
I did not realize such an esoteric journey would be so painful. The decision to take knowledge, intellect, and ability toward the one purpose to seek peace, to allow it into my life so completely has given me so much more clear perspective on what it is to be human.
To be fully human.
Some moments in my day, I do not know if I will ever be fully human. However, the pursuit of peace has drawn me closer to my human side.
Tonight will be filled with my dreams in metaphor. My day side dreams have manifested quiet and inspiring.
However, its time to rest. |
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| Not going anywhere for a while |
[Feb. 13th, 2008|08:48 pm] |
Triggers: Television Remote.
Jr. has had a meltdown for the last three nights. Once this morning and finally tonight. Its too much. He is like an inconsolable infant. However, he's five feet two 110lbs and his voice is cracking.
Well, I can imagine now that I have reached my limit. I have reached it months ago...maybe a year ago. This is the first time that I am mentioning it here. I have grown completely tired of talking to people. Special education teachers who are just discovering autism, well meaning associates who have come to autism via Oprah, and family who just go through the motions waiting to escape the conversation completely with, "but you're such a good mother."
Or some euphemism for: "I'm glad its not me."
I've become silent with my words and taking action only. I've done it when I have been at my worse, sick with immunological, rheumatoid, and pre-cancer issues.
Rationally, this has all been an exercise in the futile. I am glad that I have not sunk fortunes of cash into the kid.
My time, emotions are priceless. So, what now?
Has this life proved to me just how strong the human can be? Maybe.
However, I find myself pretending to be angry, resentful and recalcitrant. I pretend because I feel nothing. No sadness, no remorse, no..no..no.
"You're so patient."
No, I have limitless time when the outcome never has meaning for me. I will outlive everyone who relates to me as family or a relative, I don't bother to attach myself.
Yet, I pretend. I pretend because its what I know they understand. The appropriate emotion for the appropriate situation. Its a formula. I am motivated toward harmonizing and peace. However, I wonder if my motivations were to change towards chaos and war...
I know, it would be the same. A calculated, unpretentious discipline.
Jr. sits on the sofa now working on his art. I wait for him to retire because it would be irresponsible to leave an adolescent autistic roaming the household while mentally falling apart. After all, I am a trained medical professional, parent and host of other things that wouldn't make sense to abandon the kid.
Anyway, he's interesting to watch.
The other members of the household are asleep or listening to music. Jake the cat burned himself while loafing near the radiator. I found him and put some bactine on the injury. Not too bad, 1st degree burn. Husband O is on duty tonight. I'll see him later and we'll bring in the Valentine's day watching some film.
Later |
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| (no subject) |
[Feb. 7th, 2008|08:53 pm] |
I've been quiet on the live journal, myspace, and off-line as well. Generally speaking, I have been inspired yet uninspired. My duties at home have become a steady routine of maintaining the natural rhythms and harmony of the household.
Then we broke for some dancing to Nirvana and giggled over Piggy dance letters A through C. We definitely broke down in tears over 'Air lawn mower" dance...a modified Piggy Letter C.
Me: "You guys want to watch the Anime Movie?"
Pod: "You mean that one that's called: Grave of the Fireflies?"
Me: "Yep."
Pod: "Yay, I've been waiting patiently to see what that's about."
Ada: " A full length movie?"
Me: "Yeah."
Ada: "Synopsis?"
Me: "A studio Gibli Production, but not a Hayao Miyuzaki film. The anime is based on a book by the same title, autobiographical fiction Genre: Historical fiction; the setting end of World War II Japan; Two children become orphaned and it is a snapshot on their experience. That's all I'm gonna say brat."
Pod: <grabs her chinese new year stuffed panda Tien Tien> "Lets do this."
Ada: "Ready. You seen this already?"
Me: "Many times...you'll enjoy it. They're kids about your age and siblings and the voice acting is a good english dub." |
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| Winning contests and vanquishing unsolicited callers |
[Jan. 16th, 2008|03:18 pm] |
As a random thing, I was investigating 'Cloverfield'sometime last week. Googling this and that. I don't know what the movie is about, but the trailer grabbed my interest. I learned that there was a myspace for 'cloverfield' and there was a contest going on. Ok, so I don't usually enter contests so as a funny thing I did.
I read the rules on the myspace. I don't mind. I'm somewhat of an open book and I love to network with my internet people and businesses. Name, contact number and that was about all. Oh, yeah I had to rsvp to some event.
Then Monday night on my way to work I get a call at home and it says Paramount on the caller ID. The oldest, Ada, she noticed and was approaching me with the phone. She knows I hate talking on the phone and have these really weird habits (more about that later). A representative from Paramount tells me that I won. It really means I'm on the guest list to the 'Cloverfield' party tomorrow night in NYC.
"Bring ID and a camera. The cast will be there." Paramount rep instructed.
Well, that's nice. I'm a little excited about the party. However, I think I am more excited about the movie itself. I love movies with Armageddon themes.
Weird phone habits:
I get a lot of unsolicited calls. Organizations that want donations, or to refinance my home or sell me a loan to buy cars. These calls come to our home all hours of the day time. So, I have decided to have fun with these people. Especially Omni fitness. For two years they have been calling my home about a young woman who doesn't live in my household. Repeatedly, I we have told them to stop calling. The phone calls had stopped for a period after I threatened the supervisor with a cease and desist order.
All unsolicited calls get the same treatment(I wait for the automatic caller to connect me to a live person. In my past life I was a market researcher specializing in the developing and delivery of scripted surveys. I prepared a script for myself. Husband O adlibs:
Self: "Ominami papateen!"
Caller: "I'm sorry!"
Self: "You have reached the Sanzo party, how may I help you?"
Caller: "I've reached the what?"
Self: "You have reached the Sanzo party. How may I connect your call?"
Caller: "This is a business?"
Self: "Yes, it is. We are the Sanzo party."
Now usually the caller will hang up after the first response. However, rarely have I had to go on through the script.
Caller: "What kind of business is this."
Self: "We are the Sanzo party. The Sanzo Party has specialized for over one hundred years in the vanquishment of demons and spiritual beasts. Under the supervision of our Budhist Sanzo Priest a team specialize in identifying, purification, and or the vanquishment of spiritual beasts. What is the nature of your infestation?"
This has happened twice that I have gotten this far. However, after the call the offspring and I have a good laugh and race to capture the calls between 3pm and 5pm so they can watch and listen to me play. |
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| Borrowed from rroselavy |
[Jan. 9th, 2008|05:49 pm] |
Your Score: Curmudgeonly Soul You scored -22 Extroversion, -23 Sensitivity, and -3 Openness!
You are an independent, confident person. You march to the beat of your own drum, and if other people don't like it, they can go f*** themselves. You don't really care what they think, or at least you THINK that you don't care. You believe that people should live and let live.
You are an introverted soul, disliking the crowds of morons and idiots that you find at big parties or clubs. You prefer to be on your own, or with a couple close friends. When you are forced to be social, you get tired quickly. You need to curl up with a good book or spend a night on the computer to recharge.
You have a strong sense of self, and it doesn't bother you much when people criticize you, especially strangers. You care more about what your family thinks, but probably not enough to change yourself for them. In any case, your loved ones know that under that gruff, aggressive exterior there is a caring friend.
Your daemon's form would represent your confident, occasionally aggressive and solitary nature, but might betray your softer underbelly. He or she would probably help you make fun of the idiots around you, but would also provide the comfort and affection that you sometimes deny yourself in everyday life.
Form suggestions:
Badger, Jackal, Black Bear.
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| In retrospect and foresight |
[Jan. 2nd, 2008|05:11 pm] |
A new year has begun. Its going to be intense. I have spent quite a bit of time reflecting and weaving things in my life for optimal output. The end of 2007 I did not socialize. I took a complete timeout in that respect. I don't really count my time with the offspring as socializing. Its more like social training for them. It has become my job without pay. In a good way.
Grades 5, 6, and 8 (special education with an IEP). I have taken to using all that psychology, behavioral psychology, and clinical training and use it in a systematic and practical way. Surprisingly, I do come with a lot of skills it would seem.
Academically, I have been supplementing the offsprings' education. However, it had proved to be less efficient given the quality of professional teaching at their respective institutions. Apparently, I have minimal standards that exceed the capabilities of the facilities. Rather than bump heads with their primary teachers, who often discourage the students from moving onward in the texts, I simply override the directives at home and have the offspring drill, using the text, I keep a working portfolio of their work.
Upon reviewing the classroom notes of random students in the children's classes I have come across quite a few errors or deficient instruction in the mathematics section. Regretably, algebra and its precursors in mixed numerals and fractions, humanities teachers are ill- equipped to give proper instruction.
I'm no genius at these things, I enjoy all subjects rather unequally, depending on where I am in my life. Right now, I am interested most in strategy, warfare, and financing.
Teaching the offspring is a constant exploit. From using the internet, to defragging the computer, downloading music to their MP3's and troubleshooting their simCity... There are the more traditional and contemporary areas of dollmaking, knitting, sewing, and budgeting for the build-a-bears' needs (clothes, restuffing, accessorizing). Hobbies, paneling comic strips, instruction in shading using different media...
Then there is the everyday issues of school life. Negotiating, toleration, how to be gentle and temper violence in others. On occasion there are some situations where I simply need to make rounds and visit the schools and just hang out sipping coffee and observing. Other times I mingle with the students and offer advice, settle disputes, dictate... Coaching in their academic deficiencies.
"You dummy it down so well, mom."
"Do, I?"
Not really, I just tailor my teaching to the student. I have the time, the training and the will to do it. After all, it is so much more easier to teach 'typical students' when you're a pro at teaching autistics.
It helps to be on the spectrum too. I am not distracted by the usual emotional outburst or mental hiccups neurotypicals seem to be quite afflicted with.
Next time |
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| Disquiet |
[Nov. 16th, 2007|09:26 pm] |
Prize
Imposition of great privation upon
For great objects demand such enduring trial
Mind to bear the matter of prudence prompted
Not by her own feelings there
For such sacrifice is recompense
Or bound to pay another time as subsistence |
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| Knowledge and suffering |
[Nov. 9th, 2007|06:11 pm] |
Only Knowledge is worthy of the soul.
Do not believe in the things you do not understand.
For it leads only to your suffering.
Seeker after knowlege.
S.S. |
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