My Reflection, dirty Mirror

Tue, 24 Apr 2007 18:56:49 GMT

I found this on one of my friend's blogs and liked it. Makes sense.

A Meditation on Maturity

by: LINA54__

Maturity isn't about no longer doing stupid shit but rather about no longer blaming it on someone else. Now, you need to take reponsibilty for your actions. Growing up isn't about no longer saying dumb things but about knowing that you need to watch your mouth. The things you say have consequences so think before you speak.
I'm taking this time to write my opinion about immature girls. This is all in the hope that maybe they'll start realizing that they're all being hypocrites. Just so you know and don't all decide to message me and argue about how everyone gossips at one point in time, this isn't just about gossip. You're right, everyone gossips, this is for the immature girls who constantly gossip about their own friends behind their back. Key word: friends.

So, to the population of girls who haven't fully matured yet:

1) Ask Yourself These Questions
Whose fault is it that you're so insecure about yourselves that you must pick on others to boost your ego?
Whose fault is it that you are so bored with your lives that you must constantly talk about what others are doing?
Whose fault is it that you over exaggerate things and create unnecessary drama?
Whose fault is it that you can't let go of stupid grudges?
Whoes fault is it that even when someone doesn't do anything you still find something to say about them?

[If you didn't answer any of these questions with your own name then stop reading. There is no hope for you]

2) Grow Up & Get A Life
I'm sorry but if you "hate someone with a passion", get over it. Why are you wasting all this time talking about someone if you hate them so much? And what's the point of saying things behind their back? They're not gonna find out if you hide it, so they're gonna keep thinking that you're still friends with them and keep hanging out with you which will piss you off even more. So you know what, just say it. Cut the fake shit. Save everyone's time and just be honest for once.

3) Look In The Mirror
Before you start talking about someone take a look in the mirror. Calling someone a bitch? Think back, have you been the nicest person? Calling someone a whore? Have you never done something slutty in your whole life? Calling someone ugly..need i go on?

4) Be Smart.
If you talk shit about someone, THEY'RE GOING TO FIND OUT. I don't care if you told one person who swore they wouldn't tell. People talk and people have ears, they listen in on conversations. So yea, eventually everyone's gonna know. And when everyone find's out it's gonna be way worse than if you had said it straight up.

**HUGE SIGH**

Maybe you should all stop being so fake so we can all realize who our true friends are cause honestly, you can't trust anyone these days. I can't wait until everyone's secrets come out and everything falls apart cause that's when every little thing you said will be out in the open and everyone will know how fake their "friends" are. What goes around comes around and I can't wait until this comes and bitch slaps all of you across the face. You all deserve it. Girls are so dumb these days, do we really have nothing better to do than constantly bitch about each other? If so then we need to definitely change that, cause this is getting out of hand. No one is safe from being a target because everyone has something they can say about you. And if you read this and know that you constantly gossip about people with your friends, not to stir things up or anything but if they're constantly talking about other people behind their back, what makes you think that they're not talking about you behind yours?

Wed, 07 Mar 2007 05:15:46 GMT

so you are probably tired of hearing this but i'm gonna
say it anyways. taft dance team did awesome at their
competition this weekend and i am super proud. =]

and my.."buddy" lol carlos went to watch! and he
brought me flowers and it was nice. lol and today we
went out. we were gonna see a movie but i had to
choreograph with dan so it would run too late. instead
we went to chipotle, ate, then walked around
the topanga mall. he bought me two stuffed animals,
eeyore and tigger. but i made him keep the eeyore and
we're gonna switch off every week lol and we took
pictures lol cause we're losers. lol but yea it was
really fun. =]

so besides the good news, certain..things have been
pissing me off so of course, i have to vent. i'm gonna
make this short and simple because if i make it long
it's gonna go on forever, i have so much shit to say
but you know what, i'm compressing it down to this:

I'm not wrong. I'm not the one to blame here, don't try
to make me be the bad guy, and you the innocent one.
i'm not even going to try to convince all the people
you turned against me that i am telling the truth.
cause you know what. i'm right. i'm sick of your lies,
i'm sick of your acts, i'm sick of your games, and i'm
sick of you thinking you're better than us. you call
yourself my friend but really, you're a backstabber.
and you know what? if you think i'm wrong, if you think
i'm being an unreasonable bitch then come and tell it
to my face. but no, there is no point in having to explain
myself to you because I AM RIGHT & YOU ARE WRONG.
and don't you dare go and pretend like you did nothing
wrong and that you haven't been giving me attitude
for the past weeks. don't even try. and expect me to
pretend i'm fine. cause i'm fed up with your bullshit.
i'm finally taking a stand and making things right and
you know what, you better be scared, cause you've
been hiding in all of those damn lies and now i'm going
to be the one who exposes you for what you truly are.
and i'm gonna enjoy every single damn second of it.
it's simply the way life works hun, you made it this way
now deal.

so now pics! woo! lol credit goes to melissa for most of them.

arrrcadia hs.

aww

loving the spot on angela's fabric lol

dancers are weird

purple rain!

military.

halelujah

jazz

carlos!

angela's long armm lol

he brought me flowers! only two survived. lol

before crack.
......

....
......

.......

.......

.........
............

...............

.......
.............

......................

after crack.

hip hop!

peace and we outtt. =]

awards.

are we gonna win?

??!??!?! waiting...

OMG.

yayyyyy

we won.

first place.

yea baby

number one. =]

Wed, 27 Dec 2006 22:23:23 GMT

And we feel like rain when the words all sound the same,
in the lifeless corners of this empty frame.

ah so. things have changed since my last update. i officially hate men. && i officially only trust about 5 people. lol winter break's been really fun, i really needed it. i finally cleared my head & figured out some stuff. plus christmas wasn't so bad either. i got some jewelery, some clothes, some money & gift cards, a really cute coach bag. and i got a car! i'm the owner of a silver '01 VW Beetle. =] ahh. i feel dumb. i should've listened to people and taken driver's ed. lol i'm still driving it though. illegally. oops. =/ eh. it was really cute how they planned it. cause i just asked them for money for christmas. and so they gave me like 20 bucks. i was like..geez. thanks. lol and then when everyone finished getting their gifts they gave me the last one. and it was a little toy blue beetle & the keys were inside. and then i walked outside and my brother had brought it over. ahhh. lol well yea i haven't posted pics in a long time so here you go.

my lovely toy car

my lovely real car.

suprise. teeth. i'm actually smiling with my teeth in some of these pictures. yikes..

you know how i do.

it runs in the family.

don't mind the messy hair lol

i felt colorful one day.

morning. && day.

the top trouble makers at christmas. aka the power rangers from hell.

my little godson carlitos. aka casper [cause he's so white lol]

new shirt!

earrings were a birthday present from danielle.

Mon, 16 Oct 2006 01:03:24 GMT

so this weekend really really really sucked.
friday the 13th finally brought me bad luck.
it had to have been the worst timing ever for
me to realize that this superstition is true.
i did something very stupid & i hurt someone
who i've already hurt a hell of a lot of times.
and he's the last person i wanted to hurt.
{AND taft lost against birmingham. =[ grrr }
so basically i feel like the worst person ever.
and i guess i am. cause this is all my fault.

Thu, 05 Oct 2006 02:35:06 GMT

so matise is over.
we broke up today.
please don't ask questions.
it's not your business, it is mine.
&& please no asking why.
my decision.
my reasons.

thank you.

Tue, 01 Aug 2006 03:23:08 GMT

dance team practice starts tomorrow!
ahh.
i'm nervous but i'm soooo excited!
football season's coming up!
woot.
=]

Tue, 16 May 2006 04:51:21 GMT

A While ago.

OverHills FarAwy: ya...i dont like getting close to people cause i either hurt that person or i get hurt, its like setting ur self up to be disapointed
xdegrees of HOPE: well i think i've met my match. those exact words have come out of my mouth before.
OverHills FarAwy: =)
OverHills FarAwy: but
OverHills FarAwy: with you there is a difference, i know i will be eventually hurt...there will be a time....but i dont care becuase its worth it becuase of all the times a spent with you before it
xdegrees of HOPE: oh so you're positive you're gonna get hurt?
OverHills FarAwy: most definitely
xdegrees of HOPE: don't be quite so sure.
OverHills FarAwy: y
xdegrees of HOPE: cause that's exactly what i think about you.
OverHills FarAwy: well i have met my match
xdegrees of HOPE: =]
OverHills FarAwy: this is what i feel
OverHills FarAwy: im gonna love u now and forever....we'lll both eventually move on but ill always be ur friend and ill always be there if u need me
xdegrees of HOPE: hm.
OverHills FarAwy: bitterseet
OverHills FarAwy: bittersweet*
xdegrees of HOPE: yep.
xdegrees of HOPE: but i don't think that's what's gonna happen.
OverHills FarAwy: o
OverHills FarAwy: well whats ur idea
xdegrees of HOPE: hm i dunno.
xdegrees of HOPE: i'm not good at looking into the future.
xdegrees of HOPE: i just know that that doesn't exactly sound lke a happy ending.
OverHills FarAwy: well i'll never break your heart
xdegrees of HOPE: that, mister, is what they all say.
OverHills FarAwy: well im not everyone
xdegrees of HOPE: that's true.
xdegrees of HOPE: but you're a guy.
OverHills FarAwy: ya but i've made mistakes and ive learned from them and i'll never hurt you
xdegrees of HOPE: and what makes you think that i, would hurt you?
OverHills FarAwy: because one of us will have to let go
xdegrees of HOPE: well i've never been good at that.
OverHills FarAwy: nor i
xdegrees of HOPE: well i guess we're stuck together.
OverHills FarAwy: guess so

that conversation makes me happy. =] well, i'm home. i was in the hospital from saturday to today. so let's see this weekend was pretty interesting. lol well let's start with friday, friday was good. friday was my four month with matan. i love him so much. he brought me flowers, made me a card, and paid for my first dance team payment. isn't that boy amazing? geez. i love him. well then he went to the track meet, while i was in school dying of "cramps" lol he broke 5 minutes! yay! lol i'm so happy for him. and then we went out to the galleria and saw Stick It. eh, it wasn't horrible. but to tell you the truth i wasn't paying attention much lol um so yea then saturday woke up and my "cramps" were fucking horrible. my mom didn't listen. went online looked up the symptoms. hello, appendicitis. so my bro took me to the doctor's. they told me i needed a legal gaurdian. w/e. so i wait till my mom gets home, she doesn't listen to me till like 9:30. so they finally take us in like at 10:30. they take blood tests, give me a CAT scan and an X-ray. then the doctor comes like at 3 in the morning 'everything seems normal, it doesn't look like she has anything wrong' he leaves. comes back like 10 seconds later. 'nevermind, it's appendicitis.' lmao i was laughing so hard. lol so at like 4:00 in the morning. i get my room. fall asleep. get waken up like at 7:00. how fun..yea lol well then i talked to matan so i was happy for a split-second lol..then i went to surgery. eh. well all i remember is going in scared as hell then coming out. then vomitting. then crying cause it hurt like a bitch. hm well then had to stay there till today. eh besides the pain, it was fun lol i had cool nurses. one had a british accent so that was cool, the other one reminded me of the guy from gladiator lol, the other one reminded me of the guy from will & grace lol, and the rest were really nice. yea, i had a lot lol bleh. well, i'm tired, i think i'll go to sleep. =] see you people..when i see you. i have no idea when i'm coming back.. =/

Sat, 06 May 2006 03:11:39 GMT

um. i hate him. he's dying, he doesn't understand. he's sick. he's has to go to the hospital. he could leave any second. i hate him for doing this. i hate him for being so stubborn and careless. wtf. why doesn't he get it? gr. sorry. my grandpa's dying. and he's an inconsiderate bastard so he won't fucking go to the damn hospital for a damn chance in life. sorry. i'm just..venting. i'm horribly scared. this is stupid. today was supposed to be a good day.

Thu, 02 Mar 2006 04:53:36 GMT

.i've been locked inside your heart shaped box for weeks.

[[<3]]

time for a recap, huh? well..let's start with the good stuff:

i've been going out with matan for over a month now and it's been..amazing. he's incredible. he's all i wanted. and i feel soo lucky. i love him, and that would be scary to say if it was any other guy but for some reason with him..it's different.

i joined the competition team for valley college. it's soo much fun, i love it. my stunting has improved so much. it's really different than taft. we actually get work done. it's really cool and it's a really good workout. i'm a flier. it's kinda creepy cause she has me doing a lot of new tricks but i love it. and i finally got like a explanation for flying lol cause i've always been like rushed into it and i never got anything explained and now i did. yay. i feel bad though cause i always end up hurting someone.. =/

my classes finally changed and i love it.

TAFT'S GOING TO THE CHAMPIONSHIP AGAIN. hopefully we win this time.. Saturday is Taft vs Westchester. eek. i'm nervous.

so now the bad stuff. this week hasn't exactly been the best. first off, a couple days ago i found out my brother was moving out. that really pisses me off cause he broke his promise. when he left i asked him 'are you coming back' and he said 'don't worry i promise i'll come back for at least a couple months. it'll be like i never left' hm. well my mom comes up to me the other day and says your brother's on the phone. i was busy so i was like 'what does he want.' 'oh he just wants to tell you he's moving out. he got a place by LAX with raymond and ivan.' ..are you serious. i didn't talk to him. i haven't talked to him. i'm fucking pissed. and i'm really really sad. this has been the longest i've been apart from him and now it's gonna be permanant? great. i wonder how the hell i'm gonna survive my parents without him..

i got my ipod stolen yesterday. i think this one fat mexican chick did it. so i can tell on her and maybe i'll get my ipod back but i highly doubt it. plus i'll get my ass beat or something worse..gr. i dunno waht i shoudl do. i think i'm going to tell ms mahr. see what she can do. oh and today i think i lost my wallet. but it might be in one of my lockers. hm. oh well. as andrea says 'my cell phone [which i lost like a month ago], ipod, and wallet were all in my purse and someone stole it and i tried to run after them but i fell and i tried to get up and chase them but my leg hurt too much' lol hm let's see if that'll work with them parents..

the mom's being bipolar as always. she was getting a little better but she managed to kill that with her paranoia. dad's being ok. he's perfectly fine when my mom doesn't say anything to him. like valentine's day when he got me this white stuffed pig. and flowers and candy. it was cute.

oh that reminds me. i got a new stuffed animal today. it's a little grey elephant. i named it platty. lmao.

i was thinking about self confidence the other day. is there really someone who is confident in every apsect of their life? i'm not sure that person exists. for some reason we all find flaws in ourself or in our life. i guess it's just the way thing are. cause for some reasons it's our flaws that make us strive for excellence. even though at the same time, it's our flaws that make us unique and beautiful..hm.

yea, i write too much..
-denny. ♥

Tue, 03 Jan 2006 03:43:07 GMT

So this is the new year....and i don't feel any different.

2006, wonder what this year will bring. hm. Mine was ok. New year's eve kinda sucked.Except for the fact taht i got to see titanic lol god i love thath movie. yea well new year's i was at my grandma's. i saw titanic and the exorcism of emily rose. it wasn't scary at all. and besides that it was boring, let's just thank god i had my ipod. new year's day. i spent at home with my family from bakersfield and then we went to the airport and said by to my brother. then i got invited to my friend angela's kickback. [not angela adams.] well this year i decided not to make resolutions [so i wouldn't feel like a failure when i didn't do them] i just have a little list of things that i hope happen.

1) I hope that i become a better person, i haven't exactly been the nicest person lately. I have to stop complaining and just do whatever has to be done. I have to learn how to hold my tongue and be nicer to my parents even though they don't deserve it. I just need an attitude adjustment when it comes to certain things.

2) I hope that i stop fucking up when it comes to guys and that i find one that'll manage to look past all my imperfections.

3) I hope that i keep my grades up, because i might actually have something to make my mom proud at the end of the year. And because i'm terrified of not making anything of myself.

4) I hope I stop being so lazy and start exercising and start eating healthier. I'm becoming a pig.

5) I hope that i don't succumb to old habits and that i have learned enough from my mistakes so that whatever life throws at me i can come out of it ok.

6) I hope my family and friends have better luck this year than the last.

7) I hope that i find myself. [don't ask]

Well anyways here are some pictures i took. have fun.

traffic's so pretty when you're not in it.

taking pictures of random people is fun.

it's like watching a movie that you've never seen before.

bored. at the airport. with a camera. lol.

bored. at my house. with camera.

and finally.. bored. while waiting for mom to finish getting ready. with a camera.

Sat, 24 Dec 2005 07:28:34 GMT

so i haven't been on livejournal in FOREVER so i thought i might as well update to wish people happy holidays. so i uh i haven't updated since last year and a lot has changed since then. friendships good as i have grown, friendships have died, some people just changed in general. this year's ok..not as good as i thought it was gonna be but it's than last year which is pretty damn sad. let's see...last year i thought that cheer was gonna be such a blast in 10th grade..uh wrong about that. i thought that i maybe would've gotten my chance with tony..uh i was just wishing for something taht would never happen. i thought football would have taken the city champonships. we were soo close. gr. at least we got to the coliseum. it was amazing i must say. the usc locker room...wow. how many people can say that they peed in the same bathroom as the usc football team. my expectations were way higher for this year is all. but hopefully junior year will be different.

people have been acting weird, i don't like it. boys...boys boys boys hmm. had a boyfriend..didn't really go where i wanted it to. wasn't feeling what i should have. but yet he still comes around which is great..yea lol there's this guy in my spanish class who i call my little emo kid lol his name's marcos. he's cool. i feel like i know him somehow and i told him and he's like 'you too?' yea. he's on the soccer team. we've been flirting sort of. but i dunno. i don't like him, i like someone else. well this new boy...uh let's just say he goes by the name of matan. um what to say about him..he's a sweetheart. and i think i kinda...like him. we went to the movies tonight it was cool. [oh by the way i saw my little emo kid there, it was weird lol] it wasn't like a date date thing like i hoped it would be. cause like lex and people were there and we didn't really do anything we just talked. which was actually really cool cause i'm kinda prone to akward silences with the guys i like lol well it was date-ish. he paid for my ticket and food and stuff but like....i dunno. it was fine. i'm just hoping it was like the first step towards something. blah. i dunno it went pretty good. i wasn't freaking out like i thought i was going to. lol lex says i'm learning to go with the flow which is hard for some one like me . let's just say...i go against the current. blah.

let's see my life, lately. um well break's going pretty gay. i'm bored as hell. the highlights of my break so far, are:
1. hanging out with lex, going crazy with ribbons, balloons, tape, top ramen, & star wars....don't ask lol.
2. thinking about my dance final. me and angela are almost finished. it's going to be so awesome. oh and i got moved into intermidiate dance yay.
3....tonight. the boy you like, movie, m&m's, superman talk. lol nuff said. oh yea and your best friend at your side lol

um let's see i think that's enough for my first entry back.. maybe i'll update in the next year or so. you never know. peace out homies.

Thu, 12 May 2005 01:44:20 GMT

so i haven't updated in a while nothing has happened really. today was ok. first period was blah. second period was funny. everyone hates my teacher. nutrtion i don't remember lol third period was weird cause we actually did our test prep thing lol fourth period we ran. we PRed! yay lol lunch was funny. fifth period was funny and sixth was funny. ms stephens with her toilets lol tomorrow

wow lol this year's coming to an end. fifteen week is next week =/ i'm kinda happy but then it's 10th grade. wow. isn't it amazing that we're in highschool lol i mean i could remember when i used to think my cousins were old cause they said they were in highschool and now i'm here and blah lol i dunno it feels weird but new experiences are coming and new memories are in the making. so that's good. this year has been..different. lol i guess in a way it's taught me a lot.

Fri, 29 Apr 2005 02:42:28 GMT

I met up with him today, and all I could think about was how much I loved his laugh and how much I loved his smile. As I watched him walk away, I thought about everything he meant to me and how he would never know or care. I've seen him with her. It's one of the sweetest things. She looks so happy and she's so pretty, and she seems like someone I'd be friends with. And I dunno for some reason I just can't hate her. The way they look at each other makes me smile, yet breaks my heart at the same time. I had "forgotten" about how i felt for him, or at least I had tried, but I guess that's what happens when you try to forget your feelings for someone, they come back stronger and bite you in your unsuspecting ass. I don't know why I'm thinking about him all of a sudden. The day we first met just keeps replaying in my head. It's funny how i remember that day, I'm usually never good with dates. But then again I don't usually have crushes as big or as long as this one. he's been on my mind since the second day of school. wow i know say i'm a loser, but there's something about him i just can't let go of...

Mon, 25 Apr 2005 22:09:55 GMT

you know you do, you kill me well, you like it too, and i can tell, you never stop until, my final breath is gone..

so today i woke up sick. i was vommiting. =[ it was gross. i went to school for first and second period but i couldn't take the feeling, knowing i was gonna barf so third period i went home.. wow 6th period's gonna be pretty lame without me and angela throwing nuts in eachother's mouths lol so these past days have been rather blah. oh except finding mr hott man with sally lol oh and my whole confusion with the liking of the ex boyfriendness. yea i dunno i sort of wanna try it again but i mean, we're better off as friends, when we went out it sucked, we didn't even talk. ah. i dunno. whatever i'm bored so here are pictures.

Tue, 12 Apr 2005 04:12:25 GMT

andrea: look up the definition of umm.. and there's a picture of you.

so today was actually kinda good. first period was eh. second was funny. third was really funny. fourth was..undescribable. lol let's just say. standing in left field in the blazing sun gets to you.

me: hey tony. *tries to do beats*
angela: swing batta batta batta
me: i like the the thing you do *tries to do beats*
angela: swing batta batta batta
lmao. angela. we are awesome.

and kinda retarded lol but it's all good. fifth was fun even though i got kicked out of bio. sixth was awesome. we were working on our maps and that guy finished on friday so he had nothing to do so he came to me and angela's corner and yea it was cool. he was saying that the people on my folder were having sex but they were just passionately making out. lol nothing wrong with that..no matter where the guy's hands are..lol he's such a jocker. he has my WWJD bracelet and on the 'describe your perfect mate' ws i had for english, i wrote 'athletic, funny, romantic..' and he wrote 'athletic, funny,...umm..' lol i was like 'wtf jocker!' and he's like 'nuh huh, i didn't put romantic' lol loser..loser that i like.. lol cheer today was good. we didn't get far but we tried lol our libs are..getting there and our "basket" lmao. will need improvement but still it was fun.

the sky looked awesome like two hours ago, just like someone had painted it. it was gorgeous.

Sat, 09 Apr 2005 03:28:38 GMT

Skin the sun

Fall asleep

Wish away

The soul is cheap

Lesson learned

Wish me luck

Soothe the burn
Wake me up..

Wed, 06 Apr 2005 01:27:49 GMT

me: at least our team answered, why don't you?
that guy: i know it, i just don't wanna be wrong
me: just..take a chance
that guy: i'm not good at taking chances
me: too bad, you don't know what you're missing

lol so yea he knows and to tell you the truth i bet he doesn't care lol it's cool. we're acting like nothing happened. i'm just glad he didn't try to talk about it. so i guess you can say our first week back was good. yesterday was goodish. third period was fun but not for sally. you know i love you sally =]. and me and shawna and david and people played bullshit it was fun. shawna and hastee are really good. and so is brandon. fourth was awesome yesterday we played catch it was so much fun. i scared angela lol today was good. first was eh. second was funny. third was ok. fourth was ok. fifth was eh. and sixcth was fun yet stupid lol i hate our stupid team and the fact that they can't listen to us.

angela and me: it's november!
them: april!

wtf man. we should emancipate ourselves angela, we should. so yesterday at cheer me becca and andrea almost got a lib with carla! [shut up alexis we went high and you know it!] yay we're working on it tomorrow, fun. sarah got all mad though saying andrea took her spot, but it works way better with andrea. too bad becca got hit then maybe we could've tried it more. w/e.

wished all of my wishes, dreamt all of my dreams, hoped and hoped and hoped, but it didn't do a thing.

Wed, 30 Mar 2005 03:40:09 GMT

that guy: it's a light red
me: nope, it's a dark pink
that guy: no, it's not pink
me: um..yea it is.
that guy: no it's not
me: come on, a lot of guys wear pink nowadays it's ok
that guy: well i don't
me: well don't worry, if it helps, you look good in pink
that guy: it's not pink..
me: look at it!
that guy: all my friend's told me it was red too
me: then your friend's are just as colorblind as you are, or they're just trying to make you feel manly by telling you it's red.
that guy:..yea..probably

lol it was soo pink lol today was fun. first was ok second was amazing cause garret actually got the stuff i didn't get,which was kinda creepy lol but it's only cause he went to tutoring. nutrition eh. third funny. fourth funish, i had to hold people's feet lol. lunch was fun. fifth was soo much fun i ditched spanish and went to fifth period bio. omg it's so awesome, i love it. i wanna switch my bio period now lol it's so much fun. and sixth was awesome like always. yea i should switch my bio period. nicole has ziv. and david could sit in my spot so he could sit next to nicole and get all the answers instead of having to turn around, he'd just look over. and i'd switch into period 1 spanish so i won't have ceaser or robert in my class, and i won't get in trouble for talking os much with my buddies, it'll be awesome. tomorrow is gonna be opposite of awesome because i have to tell that guy. damn it. i dunno what i'm gonna say...ahh. what to do what to do. i'm so worried about waht he'll say..ahh i can't think about it. heh i'll just look at the dancing baby, the troubles go away with the baby..

lmao i love this thing, it creeps me out lol but i love it. it's sexy.

Fri, 25 Mar 2005 05:06:30 GMT

mr smart guy [garret lol] copying my homework

lol mr smart guy trying to paint his nails

i like this lamp lol

it just looks so cool.

just like my grandma's kitchen. lol

my nephew/godson looks creepy lol

angela hiding her gorgeous face.

as is nicole. hehe. i got a shot of ziv.

heh i'll hide my face too.

nah.

bubbles! lol

i was thinking of cutting my hair..not sure it'll look good on me.

give me feedback. i'm not sure if it'll turn out the way i want it to.

that photo's my favorite. i didn't edit it at all, that's just how the camera took it. something about traffic that i just love lol.

spring break has been fun but i really won't mind when monday comes around. i get to see that guy i "don't" like. lol =] yea it's done with robert. yea..turns out his friends were wrong, and we were going out BUT he didn't like me..so i was like..fuck that. and with alexis and leah's pushing and shoving, and my ramming into a vending machine lol i broke up with him. all for the better. right? *sigh* lol to the single life *raises glass*

Thu, 17 Mar 2005 04:40:16 GMT

silence made me happy, but the echoes managed to shatter it..

haha today was ______ (fill in the blank with any word) lol before school me and angela and sally went to corbin bowl and we bowled and some of my other friends bowled. haha that was funny 'ha gutterball!!' then he walks up and hmm what happened? GUTTERBALL. lol i was happy cause i got some strikes =] we also played ddr, wow i suck at it. lol so then we walk to quizno's find becca and make up all these creatures to play that animal concentration game thing lol it was fun. especially the potato one. =] 2nd period was funny, garret being retarded and muffing people like crazy. 4th period, laying in the sun and playing the animal concentration game. and 6th playing the animal concentration game and reminsicing about our awesome children's book about talking stomach's and animals stuck in bushes lmao. and then tony called me weird. i'm like 'oh now i'm the weird one, fidget?' he smiled and shook his head and i was like, 'don't worry, i fidget a lot too' he just laughed. so working the track meet was fun. i was happy watching jesse, brandon, david, matan, gino, jose, xavier, west africa, and everyone else running. it was fun until i found out that sam, carla, keondra, and sara had left in the middle of it. then i just got mad, then they came back and i was like 'you weren't supposed to leave' blah blah blah they said 'mr tucker said we could' blah blah bull. so i said 'you can't leave in the middle of a meet to go to get food!' blab blah blah i say 'you know what, whatever' and i turned around and sara's like 'damn..attitude' and i turn around say 'damn straight i have attitude' and walk away. then they came over there and were like 'dennise we want to talk to you' i was like 'no. i don't wanna talk to you" sam was like 'okay she's running tomorrow' 'i was like go ahead and make run i don't care anymore' i'll run cause i was late but i'm not running for 'giving her attitude'. she was going around saying i cussed her out, ha i have alexis, she was there. i didn't say one cuss word, i didn't flick her off even though i wanted to, and i even restrained myself from going over to them and beating their asses. GGRRRR my god. i hate them, every ounce of my body is filled with ahte right now. it's just. ah. tomorrow, i'm gonna try so hard to avoid them, just hearing their voice will want to make me hurt them. to people who don't know the people i'm talking about, lucky you guys. if you knew them, you'd understand. on a brighter note, TOMORROW'S ST. PATRICK'S DAY. WWOOT. =]

Tue, 15 Mar 2005 05:12:01 GMT

I can see, hearts carved on a tree. Letters inter-twined, for all time, yours and mine, oh so fine.

lol well as you can see, i was having fun with my homecoming rose crown thing lol i've been having a goodish week, starting from friday. got a 36 on my bio test and i didn't study. still a c but w/e lol good enough. then i died my hair heh. i like this color. saturday i saw ev!! and me her and angela had fun at the mall being princesses and taking pictures. lol and i had fun walking out of claire's holding that cookie monster bag lol i really shouldn't've put it back lol it was a pretty bag. lol and today i found out i got a B on my history test. wooot. lol that's the highest grade i've ever gotten!! sad but true lol yay happiness. um today was all rightish bio had fun explaining tapeworms to ziv lol 2nd period making fun of garret was fun. nutrition, eh. 3rd period funny. the horns of elfwood. lmao. 4th period grrrr..we had to weigh ourselves..bitches. lol lunch was funny. 5th period, eh, made me think a lot. 6th period. was fun. then practice went...let's not go there. we're working this wednesday at the track meet. fuunnn lol w/e as long as i get to see jose aka god. in action lol hopefully hey does that little skit where he comes in in crutches and then he throws them and gets ready to beat their asses lol haha. well tomorrow's the reverse minimum day thing which sucks cause i have the eh classes..bio (which can be fun), english (retarded but fun to annoy mr dill), and spanish (eehh) lol w/e it's all good. so my parents are kinda pissing me off..just a bit you know..lol i have a b in history now, i used to have a d, i told my mom and she was like, why don't you have an a?? god psycho, don't expect me to be all super genius on you now. and yea i still hate them for throwing out all my stuffed animals..bitches. lol i hate it how parents put so myuch pressure on you, or maybe it's just my psycho parents..such high expectations.. jesus lol

Thu, 10 Mar 2005 03:53:14 GMT

ha justin. a picture. happy. i'm sorry, it's bad like all my pictures lol for some reason it looks really wierd.

today was funny but in a bad way lol first period. i realized i'm dying lol don't ask. hr. houston got the impression taht i wanted him to tell that guy so he did. yea. he told him that i liked him. =/ talk about akward. but i didn't really talk to him today so it was cool. um. 2nd period. garret told me he wasn't looking for a gf so whoever likes him out there, sorry bad timing. nutrition bleh. 3rd period. was funny i ate a lot lol 4th period i was dying in the heat even though i was walking really slowly lol lunch was the meeting for ap enviromental. 5th period was fun. 6th period test. failed. umm let's see cheer. leah hit her head really hard on the floor falling down from a shoulder sit. ouch. it sounded soo bad. hope you feel better =] and then jaime got hit really bad by carla. ouch. hope you feel better too! damn accident after accident. so i just can't wait till tomorrow. no..i can't wait till next year, everything's better when you're a sophmore lol a fresh new start. no one calling you freshman, i'll do better in my classes, it's all better. lol w/e maybe it's just me...

Tue, 08 Mar 2005 05:21:29 GMT

alexis: "Next time think that a molester's in the water"
me: " ok ceasar's down there, i can't fall. "
* we go up and i start getting wobbly*
alexis: "Ceasar in the water!!!!!!"
me: *imagine me in a lib surrounded by water, ceasar swimming in the water and the jaws theme playing lol*

wwwwooooaaa i haven't updated in forever lol well not much has happened.well today at practice we're working on jv's competition routine and it was fun when we were stunting cause i had to do my half scorpion and then i did the kissy thing from the side in a lib lol so it was awesomeness. sam's bugging me though, she really doesn't know what she's doing. i felt bad for andrea she's stuck with new people in her group =X sux. especially cause brittany doesn't lift. so today at school was all right i guess. bio was eh got my cards taken away but got them back. hr was ok i played blackjack. 2nd period was cool. garret was being really retarded lol nutrition was pretty cool. 3rd period was funny as always. i think we're gonna drive mr dill insane =] me sally and shawna are so good at that. 4th period was allright. volleyball's cool. lunch. hanging with leah was fun and then hanging out over there was fun. 5th period was eh. 6th period was funny. haha as always. i'm very happy at the moment because i'm gonna see ev this weekend. woot happiness lol so since i do not have a boyfriend (don't ask- long story) i still have feelings for this guy. and i feel bad cause my friend likes him too. gr...

ever felt like somethings missing, it's not all the same, can't put your finger on it, but it feels different and lame. have you ever felt down and useless and ugly, like no one needs you, you're dying..yet they don't see.. like you have to put up the fake smile, so everything will be fine and worth their while. ever feel worthless and want to cry, why die to live when you're living to die. ever feel lonely , ever feel sad? fortunately for me..i have.

sorry. wrote that when i was thinking of 7th grade..

Tue, 15 Feb 2005 04:51:50 GMT

valentine's day. such a hallmark day. and i couldn't be happier.

today was supposed to suck lol but it turned out good. i got angela a present, she liked it. and i got a rose from robert. hehehe spanish was awesome cause i was like sad and then i look down, he walks in with the rose in his hand, i look up, he says 'happy valentine's day' and we hug. =] then i switched my seat for the period and sat next to him. happiness. geometry was funny. garret was being stupid again lol. i forgot to muff him today since he was doing the stupidest muffs in the world on the bus friday.

him: 'you're a soccer player'
me: 'what?'
him: 'that's a muff'
me: *wtf?*

he is the cutest thing. lol playoffs start thursday. i'm so proud of garret, bryce, javelle, and anthony, i can't believe they're playing! well garret isn't playing he's just sitting on the bench in his suit lol but it's the thought that counts. apparently 16 cheerleaders at the most are going. cause we're a waste of money i guess who knows, i better go cause amy has to go since it's her last game. sucks, i'm gonna miss her soo much. then we're gonna have no stunt group =[ that's retarded. so friday's game was...indescribable, we were left at taft till like 5:45, the jv players left on a granada bus at 5:20. but they couldn't take us. bitches. anyways when we got there the jv game was like near halftime, we started our wars with the granada cheerleaders. ha they're funny. especially their rolling split shit lol that was hilarious. so varsity game was all right. so after the game we stayed there till the baketball players finished dressing then we went outside. stood out there for like 20 minutes. wet and cold lol the bus ride back was fun, listening to amy's mp3 player, being yelled at by leah, and bugging anthony about ms bitch. ha that was funny. esecially. the letter. props to andrea lol you are too awesome. so friday we had a chance to watch the girls play basketball i like their games they're better. i'm actually kinda sad basketball's gonna be over soon. it isn't as exciting as football games but w/e they're awesome. i love them.

what's the one thing you wish you could have but you know you never will?

answer that. it's been on my mind lately.

haven't updated in a while..

Sun, 06 Feb 2005 04:58:08 GMT

they said: "we know that cheer"
i should have said: "yea well, shove it up your ass."

they said: "nice camp stunt"
i should have said: "thanks."

last night was fun as well as endurance testing. jesus lol ha i saw jesus at ralphs lmao but p.e was fun, me and angela made up two awesome stories, one about me and football and another about this awesome infommercial lmao then we hung out in the boys p.e office, it was cool. anyways. chattsworth cheerleaders were pretty rude, that bugged me, but they did tell amy that they thought we were good. w/e i'm not gonna waste my time trying to figure them out. jv lost yesterday =[ but barely, so it's all right. i was gonna hit sam during that game, seriously, and then she got in an argument with sarah and i said w/e. varsity won, of course. lol for halftime, they did a dance to 'lose my breath' and that was the song we were performing to. so i was like 'omg it's like bring it on! lol'. so we go and at first their side was booing, our side was laughing and cheering us on and when we finished, their side was cheering for us. so it was cool. lol anyways el co game on wednesday, i made peace with a girl on el co i decided to be nice and bugged her till we were cool. unless she's a backstabber..lol new semester starts tuesday, the day we get back, don't really know what to expect cause of offseason, i have no clue if i made it, or didn't. if i didn't i don't suspect that my classes will change maybe they will cause geometry and bio and if i did make it i think my whole schedule's changing. so either way i guess. too bad..i liked my classes. it was great going to portola and seeing everyone i missed them so much. i'm so glad we didn't get arrested lol it wasn't our fault the gate was open..

traffic jam, gone. three day weekend to rest up. finals are over =]