thanks to q1
, i was able to cross off a goal (#51) on my list: receive a tarot deck.
what she sent me has the most awesome, amazing power i have ever been able to hold in my hands. it is the Thoth deck
, and as soon as i put my hands on them, it was instant syncopation. my energy melded with its energy and i could feel it quivering through my body.
i handled these cards at every moment i got, slept with them in my pillow case, and carried them in my purse, in a pocket right next to my body. just thinking about them now, i can feel their energy coming through my bag and making me tremble. i never thought i had such a sense about me, but this proves it.
even with life getting in the way of handling these cards, they still give me eerily accurate readings. i go straight by my intuition; i have started studying the meanings of the cards and keeping them in a small journal, but what i feel the moment i flip or lay the card down is what it means to me. it's good to know the meaning but sometimes, it just doesn't matter.
yesterday, i was able to cross off another goal, #50, which was to have my tarot read again. i was at NESAD, working on some hand-drawn animation cells and tweening them, when i heard the librarian begin talking about cards, and the feeling she was getting from them, giving a person a reading. i quickly finished up and walked over. she had the Osho-Zen deck
, which I had never seen before but was immediately taken by them too. we began talking about our decks, and i brought mine out of my bag (i immediately felt the zap of, "HEY! You've been neglecting us!") and she felt the power of the deck. it felt SO GOOD to have them back in my hands, i immediately began shuffling and fidgeting. my friend rachel was standing next to me, and we allt hought it would be cool to do readings for each other and see if the decks would have similar outcomes.
long story short, holy shit. i did a reading for rachel, the librarian, and myself, and the librarian did one for rachel, myself, and herself. i cannot even BEGIN to tell you all how eerie it was. the similarities in each reading were mind-boggling. after i read the librarian's cards, i was positively squirming with energy. i felt like i could run a marathon and not be tired at the end of 26.2 miles. it was incredible.
after i read my own though, i was completely drained and shaky. i nearly fell over onto the floor! i could have taken a nap right then and there. the strange thing about it, is we ALL felt that same surge in energy, and the same tiredness afterwards. there was a crazy connection.
without even knowing it, we used the same elemental spread (1 card in east, south, west, north, and a 5th representing the seeker). i will eventually be moving to d.c., and her daughter is moving there in september (another connection). what brought us together was the tarot.
i don't really know how else to explain it, but it was magical and eerie and supremely wonderful all at the same time. i've discovered that my deck tends to lean more to the realistic side of things (some would say that it leans towards the negative, but i disagree), instead of being idealistic and more hopeful. i am okay with that--tell me like it is, don't lead me on this journey only to have a huge letdown at the end.
at first i was dealing cards at random, but the librarian suggested i just let the cards pop out at me. well, when that happened, they were literally falling out of my hands! with her deck, the first two popped right out, including a double, and after more shuffling and just letting go of whatever was blocking me, the other 3 came. i found it easy to read her deck and i felt very drawn to it.
the same thing happened with my cards. i started shuffling, and BAM! cards were dropping. i had two doubles and i knew exactly where they all should go. sooo cool.
and now i'm feeling the pull of the cards in my bag ...