pale september

oleander__ @ 2006-10-06T21:23:00

2006-10-07T01:25:40Z

oleander__ @ 2006-10-06T17:48:00

2006-10-06T21:54:44Z

This meme asks you to answer ten basic questions about yourself using only the titles (no lyrics) of your favorite music group's songs. Something Corporate

Are you male or female?
-- punk rock princess

Describe yourself.
-- not what it seems

How do some people feel about you?
-- 21 and invincible

How do you feel about yourself?
-- hurricane

Describe your girlfriend/boyfriend/interest.
-- she paints me blue

Where would you rather be?
-- space

Describe what you want to be.
-- the astronaut

Describe how you live.
-- i woke up in a car

Describe how you love.
-- i wanna save you

Share a few words of wisdom.
-- forget december

I want to get a new journal.

oleander__ @ 2006-10-03T15:05:00

2006-10-03T19:10:02Z

I just got overwhelmingly sad within the past twenty minutes, so I'm skipping choir. I'm not getting credit for it, so to me, it just doesn't matter. I don't really give a shit right now. I'm just really lonely and I hate it. So instead of singing halfheartedly, I'm going to curl up on my top bunk and watch the Lizzie McQuire movie, and then worry about singing later when Caroline and I try out for Pierce Idol, which will be ridiculous and fun.

Hopefully. I just hate this slip; like middle school all over again. Except it's not because my girlfriend is the Anti-Christ.

oleander__ @ 2006-09-29T11:36:00

2006-09-29T15:45:28Z

So I had a group presentation for my education class and I totally rocked it. My professor asked me after class if I was going for secondary education. When I said yes, he replied, "Good, because I think you'll be perfect for it." That totally makes my life. It's good to know that what I want to do is what I'm, so far, good at.

Anyway, um. So I went to health services last week for being ill (obviously) and I found out I have an ear infection. I've been on antibiotics and shit, but I don't know if they're really helping. I have a couple of days left, so I guess I'll see if my hearing clears up before I go back. It just really sucks. But the coughy, hacky part has gone away. Thank god.

So Tabi and I went to her hometown this past weekend and it was totally awesome. I met her friend Amanda, who is a total sweetheart and gorgeous to boot, got some pot, went to a party... Her family is amazing, too. Her dad is a hairdresser and dyed my hair for me for free. Her mom is the most generous person in the world. She gave me a blue genuine leather jacket that she's never worn, but thought I would look "perfect" in. I love it. Her mom has had a really intense life; she was a hardcore drug addict as a teenager, went on welfare to get a job, but from here, got into a company whose headquarters are in the tallest building in Boston and started making 6 figures a year. But then she had to stop because she developed narcolepsy; then she had a brain tumor and had to get it cut out, but they had to sever the connection between her left ear and her brain, so she's deaf in one ear. So now she can't work or shop or drive because she'll fall asleep, but in spite of everything, she's still upbeat and happy and open and generous. And I think she's the strongest person I have ever met in my life.

Yeah... So college and shit is going pretty well. I have bio discussion in about fifteen minutes, and then I'm done for the day. Yay for probably more sleeping, because since coming here, it seems like I need a lot more than usual. And I'm really not sure why.

Oh, by the way, today's QC comic is hilarious if you're a video game nerd like me.

threadless dot com icons

2006-09-20T01:21:30Z

So I discovered a t-shirt design website called Threadless and I'm pretty much in love with it, so I made a ridiculous amount of icons from the pictures.

Preview:

Frida's Garden

Happy Creatures!

The Communist Party

Happy When It Rains

Psychedelic Creatures

Selfless

Original Sin

Everything is A-OK

Nice Boobies

Time Fades

So Lovely

oleander__ @ 2006-09-17T11:50:00

2006-09-17T15:52:35Z

Annie is ill. It happened all of a sudden yesterday and woke up with it fully in my head, pressure and scratchy throat and coughing. And I ache all over; my stomach feels hungry but I'm afraid to eat. I swallow and feel like I wanna puke. I don't know what's been going around, but I definitely got it.

Maybe this is karma.

oleander__ @ 2006-09-14T16:19:00

2006-09-14T20:25:40Z

I am updating from a library computer, because the internet is down in my hall, and has been for the last couple of days. It's more than a little ridiculous. It's been kinda cold and dreary over here, but the trees are very pretty. They turn quite early over here, so that's pretty cool.

(By the way, I fucking hate this keyboard. It's loud, and sometimes the spacebar doesn't work.)

Anyway, I've discovered that my honors classes are a joke. Doherty called Tabi racist today during our discussion, we haven't really done ANY writing in College Writing, I just got 100% on an open essay quiz for Biology, AND the lectures have been about stuff I already know. What BS. I think the only class I'm going to actually learn shit in for a while is Ceramics. I really suck at throwing, by the way. I'm going to practice tomorrow after my classes, I think, depending on when Tabi's friends are going to be coming. They'll be staying with us for the weekend, which is pretty cool. I'm excited to meet them.

Um.. Yeah. I don't know. College has been a good time. My alarm clock broke, which is pretty fuckin' sweet, I must say. I'm going to Gamer's Club tonight with my friend Chris. Josh is my new pretend boyfriend, Harmony is an obnoxious know-it-all, and I really miss Jessi.

So stuff is pretty much decent.

oleander__ @ 2006-09-08T10:01:00

2006-09-08T14:22:22Z

So my first week of college is almost over. I have a bio class at noon, but otherwise, I'm done. Unfortunately, I haven't done too much to actually be able to "report" on the way of classes, but I do have a fair amount of homework for next week. Here's the breakdown:

Foundations and Issues in Education - Prof. Villemaire
What an awesome teacher. He's pretty funny and all about having a good time in class. He's always like, "Don't worry guys, you'll start talking eventually." I actually do think this class will be extremely helpful to me; that, and when I go into the teacher certification program, he'll be my advisor for that. So that's pretty exciting.

Ceramics I - Prof. Silverman
What a cool lady. There are only seven kids in my class, or thereabouts, varying in levels of skill and experience, so I'm sure there'll be lots of things to learn. She seems like the type of teacher who is infinitely patient, but will tell you what you're doing wrong and give you the means to help fix it. The other awesome part is the fact that the ceramics studio is open 24/7, so I can work on my projects or even just practice whenever I want. Unfortunately, because this class only meets Mondays and Wednesdays and our first class was a Wednesday, we didn't start working with the clay, but that'll be Monday, and I'm super, super excited.

Biology I Lecture - Bio. department
Basically, the way my biology class is set up is Mondays and Wednesdays we have lectures, Tuesdays we have labs, and Fridays we have discussions. The prof. for my lab led the first lecture, and he's awesome. His name is Prof. Vielleux, or Prof. V, and he's a bat biologist. I think I'm gonna enjoy this one, even though it'll probably be difficult as all hell.

College Writing I - Prof. Zan
OMG what an uberdyke. Nicole, she reminds me of Ms. Beckstrom from Northstar. Basically, bulldyke grey hair, androgynous clothes, but still really upbeat and excited about teaching and writing and getting to know all of us. The room is cold as shit, though. It's basically set up like Adv. Writer's Workshop was, except it's in a computer lab in the basement of the library.

IC101 - Freshman Seminar - Prof. Doherty
I'm really not too sure I like this professor. I don't dislike her, but she's the type of really awkward professor who's taught for a long time, but has never really understood how to connect with students. The type that doesn't quite hear you right and will ask you something unrelated, and then get flustered when it's not the right thing. She's not quite that interesting either.

Choral Union - Prof. Brandes
So I had too many credits once I switched into honors biology, so I'm taking this as a non-credit. Still, we had such an amazing rehearsal. We sound good, and it was only the first rehearsal on Tuesday. Learned a complete song in an hour and a half. Lots of upperclassmen, but they're pretty nice, so no big.

That's basically it... As far as my dorm goes, I looove my room. It's so comfy and Tabi and I made it look so awesome. Though there's sort of a problem with this girl stalking me, it's not a huge problem and I think she got the message that I really would like it if she didn't try to get into my pants, kthnxbai, and hasn't really bothered me for two days. We've been going to Wal-Mart a TON though.. It's really the only place where we can buy shit.

Last night was a great time, though. I went to Keene, the next town over, with my roommate Tabi, this girl from my peer group Caroline, and her friend Caitlin, and we just hung out in the downtown area over by Keene State, and had some great pizza and spent, like, an hour or so in this used music store. I got this CD by a band called deadboy and the Elephantmen, and they sound really great. Think harder, not so breathy/folky Iron and Wine and you got them. Got it for fuckin' 8 bucks, AND I got a new copy of Return of Saturn for 8 bucks as well, 'cause fuckin' Cori never replaced the CDs of mine she lost.

Whatevs. So things are great here. I'll all up for getting calls from people, so ya'll should give me a call sometime. Just keep in mind I'm on Eastern time.

oleander__ @ 2006-09-01T21:55:00

2006-09-02T02:09:34Z

So New York City. What a fucking crazy place. We stayed in the Embassy Suites hotel in downtown Manhattan, a block or so away from the World Trade Center hole. In the distance, I could see the Statue of Liberty. It was kinda cool. We had a very NYC experience. I fell asleep on the subway, our cab driver was awesome and sang to music and drove like a maniac, TIMES SQUARE IS AWESOME AND I WAS OUTSIDE THE VMAS WHILE THEY WERE GOING ON, I bought shoes, and had really good sushi and authentic Italian food. It was fuckin' crazy. I loved it, even though it was dirty and smelly and loud. There's a certain quality to NYC that just draws you in. I wouldn't mind visiting again.

Right now, I'm in Keene, NH, staying in the same Holiday Inn Express that Andi and I stayed in. Tomorrow, we're heading out to Rindge, which is about 20 miles away, and getting there between 9-9:30. I'm excited about going, I really am. I'm just so... I miss Jess. A lot. I've been able to suppress it a lot yesterday and today, but now it's really getting to me. About five minutes ago we were just on MySpace at the same time and I told her to get AIM and she told me to message her on MySpace, but she can't receive MySpace IMs and then she was gone. And I haven't really been able to talk to her since I left. And leaving was so hard... My last day in Minnesota, I cried all day. I was so stressed out and unhappy and you know what, I'm just kind of freaking out because I need her so much and it's only been a few days and it's so dumb but so true. I don't know what to do. I just want to talk to her.

I got my hair cut/dyed... I'll post pictures at some point.

college stuff.

2006-08-15T19:02:17Z

Here's my schedule for fall:

MON
Foundations & Issues in Education - 9-9:50
Ceramics I - 10-12
College Writing I HONORS - 4-5:15

TUES
Algebra & Trigonometry I - 8-9:15
Individual & Community HONORS - 12:15-1:30
Choral Union - 3-4:30

WEDS
same as Monday

THURS
Algebra & Trigonometry I - 8-9:15
Individual & Community HONORS - 12:15-1:30

FRI
Foundations & Issues in Education - 9-9:50

Not too bad... Though for some reason, I can't access my school email. Which supremely pisses me off. But whatever. I'll call them later. I don't wanna have to deal with it right now.

My roommate Tabi is a super sweetheart.

I was in La Crosse this past weekend and bought a bunch of college stuff. It was also really nice to see my family again, and Mike. We had a good time. I also had blue moon ice cream for the first time in years - think a blue ice cream that tastes like Froot Loops. Fuckin' delish.

Anyway... That's really it. I'm exhausted and starved. Jess, Ben and I stayed out until almost 5. Jeeesus.

oleander__ @ 2006-08-10T17:27:00

2006-08-10T22:36:25Z

A list.

001. Jessi took me out to Figlio's for dinner today. It was ridiculously good and expensive.
002. I just packed one box of books I'm taking with me to college. I'm scared and excited at the same time.
003. I just got off the phone with Mikey; I'm going to be seeing him tomorrow evening for the first time in six years.
004. Today, I finished a book called Girl Walking Backwards by Bett Williams. While the plot isn't something amazing, the characters and writing are spectacular. I suggest it for a quick summer read.
005. Last night Jess helped me go through my clothes and helped me finally get rid of some clothing that I haven't worn in forever/don't fit me right that I've never been able to get rid of, for some reason. She makes letting go of material things much easier.
006. Things have been really great, but I kind of need to get back into sleeping regularly. It's starting to mess up my dreams.

And I realized that I have LiveJournal not for other people's entertainment, but for my own. I really don't care that much about how many people I have listed as friends or how many comments I get. It's just nice to feel like someone is watching how I'm doing, someone I don't even know. People knock down the internet, blogging, and things like that so often; as if friends over the internet don't matter or exist. What I've discovered is a vast network of like-minds that I would have never found without TOD, LJ, or AOL. It might sound stupid or silly, but there are bonds I've made on here with people I've never met, people that I probably never will. But we're all close. We know each other's lives. We've been there for each other to harbor secrets that we can't say out loud. And to have that kind of escape, when social interaction can be littered with drama and corruption and betrayal, is wonderful. I don't know. I can understand not wanting it. But I don't think that it's some kind of weak point or character flaw.

mixed up girl

2006-08-07T22:10:46Z

Hey, I just made a mix about five seconds ago. Wondered if anybody was interested in a copy of it ~

PAINTINGS AND MESSY HAIR
001. the jetset life is gonna kill you + MY CHEMICAL ROMANCE
002. heart-shaped box + NIRVANA
003. three simple words + FINCH
004. movies + ALIEN ANT FARM
005. the best deceptions + DASHBOARD CONFESSIONAL
006. your house + JIMMY EAT WORLD
007. limp + FIONA APPLE
008. for what reason + DEATH CAB FOR CUTIE
009. friend is a four-letter word + CAKE
010. haligh, haligh, a lie, haligh + BRIGHT EYES
011. a gentleman caller + CURSIVE
012. lonely as you + FOO FIGHTERS
013. breaking up the girl + GARBAGE
014. konstantine + SOMETHING CORPORATE
015. doll parts + HOLE
016. chloroform perfume (acoustic) + FROM AUTUMN TO ASHES
017. sunday morning + NO DOUBT
018. you're a god + VERTICAL HORIZON

If you want a copy, and I don't already have your address, email it to me at acoustic.brightside@gmail.com. This is kind of an angry mix... I've been kind of dealing with some internal rage for a few days, so I needed some music to encompass it and let it out without hurting anyone/myself.

oleander__ @ 2006-08-06T21:00:00

2006-08-07T02:09:02Z

Uptown Art Fair was this weekend. There was a lot of repetition, but there were also a lot of talented, unique artists and works. I bought a print of a painting for $50 by a new twentysomething artist named Renae Johnson. The subject reminded me of Jess, almost to a T: short blonde hair with pink highlights, skateboarding t-shirt, studded belt, ripped jeans, checkered vans, and cell phone in hand. Not only that, but I really think it completely embodies the current culture and fads of young America. How many kids do I see a in downtown Hopkins, sitting on the sidewalk against buildings, cell phones out and txting away? It's borderline ridiculous, but I can't really say anything about it - I'm the same person.

Still, the art fair was a load of fun. I also went to Tatters (a thrift shop) for their 50% off EVERYTHING! sale and picked up a lot of things for Jess that I hope she likes. And I bought myself a unicorn belt buckle, and finally figured out how it works. (I'm kind of slow.)

Last night, I spent some time with my old pal Davies and we watched G4 and MTV VMA parody videos on YouTube. Then it rained like a mother on the drive home and I slept.

I got my roommate, but I have yet to call her - been too busy. All I know is that her name is Tabitha and she's from Connecticut. My mom said this: "No, you can't room with her. She's a witch. AND she's a rich snob." (Please note the Bewitched reference. Please.)

Anyway, I've been pretty good. Even though Lance, my old manager, fucked up my SSN when he put me into the system, and now, when I entered my actual SSN, I have to jump through a bunch of hoops in order to get my paycheck back on track. I have to re-sign up for direct deposit, which means sometime tomorrow I need to stop in and give them a blank check, so my new manager Evan can send it in and the good ol' boys at Game Stop's payroll office can process it before payday, so I don't get one of those lame "check data cards" that I can only use in an ATM once for free. It just doesn't make any sense why someone would actually use that. Fucking kangaroos.

Anyway, as usual, Michael is on his way over, and as usual, we are going to hang out for a long-ass time. We will smoke cigarettes and probably watch movies and drive around and pray to God we don't get pulled over by the cops. Good times.

oleander__ @ 2006-08-04T15:26:00

2006-08-04T20:32:58Z

My "new" job is going well. All the guys there are really funny, though I've really only gotten to work with Chris. We sit around and don't do a whole lot; this store is a lot more lax than Lance's. Which I'm glad for. And the time seems to move by faster there. I don't know what it is.

I got a bunch of blank CDs from Target, and The Princess Bride on DVD a couple of days ago. But blank CDs means if you want any of the many mixes that I make, y'all should let me know and I will make you copy.

Anyway! I'm off to go... do stuff! I ♥ Michael.

pictures? annie is an amazing kitty.

2006-07-30T23:15:03Z

I also made up a story in pictures, but Ian's on his way to pick me up, so I will perhaps post it later.

oleander__ @ 2006-07-29T14:41:00

2006-07-29T19:49:00Z

I might be a douchebag and get a new journal soon.

Maybe. I haven't really thought about in depth yet. I figured sometime around now would be a good time because I have all this free time, since Jess is gone. But y'know. I dunno. I've just had this one for a really long time, and it seems like a lot of people on this friends list I don't really talk to, or we aren't actually friends... But I'm not the type of person to just remove people from my flist. I get too overwhelmed and the like. I just need a clean slate, especially since I'm heading off to college in less than a month. (Which is very, very scary.)

Anyway... Hurricane is still my baby. Jess is in Washington right now - in the city that Kurt Cobain grew up in. I forget what it's called. (I get the feeling she doesn't actually care what I've been up to, though - but I'm probably just being paranoid.) But I bought her a shirt, anyway, from Urban Outfitters. They didn't have the shirt I actually wanted to buy for her (and it's not on their website - goddamn them), but I ended up finding a really awesome shirt that I really, really hope she likes - it's dark green with a yellow French-looking face and a hand holding a Volcom sign, and underneath it it says, VOLCOM EST FANTASTIQUE! ... I guess if she doesn't like it, I'll wear it.

But I met Michael's sister yesterday! I'm pretty sure her name is Mary. She's basically an older, more alcoholic and pothead version of me. It was awesome hanging out with her. And apparently she generally doesn't like Michael's friends. So I felt extra special.

I also bought a sweater and a pair of elephant panties from dElia*s. Man, typing their store name is so obnoxious, but I love the store to death. And I got a free $25 off coupon (with the purchase of $50 or more... but still). FOR AWESOME.

Still have a few more programs to get onto my computer, but otherwise... my laptop is all filled up with stuff. Probably tomorrow, my desktop will find its way into the trash. Unless Davies wants to meddle with its insides... We'll see.

oleander__ @ 2006-07-27T07:28:00

2006-07-26T20:34:12Z

OMG I am updating from my new laptop! It's an Acer Aspire 500, with lots of cool things that I won't bore you with. It was kinda pricey, but worth it; and the screen is all shiny and stuff! It makes me really happy. Finally, I can get rid of that icky desktop piece of shit sitting in my room. This is sleek and silver and weighs 6.2 pounds. I named it Hurricane.

Um... What to update? Jess and I did another show at the Depot last night. We had a ridiculously big crowd, too, it was amazing. We did fairly well; minimal screw ups. Our set list included "Janine" by Soul Coughing, "Simple Kind of Life" by No Doubt, "Photobooth" by Death Cab for Cutie, "Wonderwall" by Oasis, and "Let it Rain" by Tilly and the Wall that Jess actually learned how to play earlier that afternoon. We called Ellie and played/sang it for her; she said it totally made her day. ♥ It made me super happy. (Oh, and it's my favorite Tilly song, too.)

And now she's gone. She should be closer to North Dakota by now, I think. She's going to Oregon with some friends for about two weeks, to camp and the like over there. I hope she has fun, but I'm going to miss her a lot. I already do.

Had my first physical exam ever today. My family doctor is really cool, though. She was like, "Yeah, you don't need to get a pap smear. You only really need one if you're having sexual intercourse with a male, and you're not. Unless you're planning on doing so, I don't really recommend it." Probably because they're ridiculously uncomfortable. I also got updated on my shots - Metingitus and Tetanus. The nurse was like, "Okay, here's Tetanus (poke). And here's Metingitus (poke)." And I went, "...That was it?" There are only pinpricks where she put the needles in both my arms. They don't really hurt, but I'm sure the Tetanus shot will hurt tomorrow.

... I'm so in love with my new laptop. But I should head back onto my desktop and start sorting through files. After I download Zone Alarm on this computer. And iTunes. Even though I can't transfer my music yet (I'm getting my memory stick tomorrow from robotLOVE, so it'll be super cute).

EDIT New screen name!: rain of chords
Add me, bitches.

bored&depressed. (mood)

2006-07-24T04:50:51Z

Step 1: Open up whatever MP3 program you use and add every song in your collection.
Step 2: Put it on random.
Step 3: Pick random lyrics from the first 10 songs, no matter how embarassing the song.
Step 4: Post and let everyone you know guess what song and artist the lines come from.
Step 5: Cross out the songs when someone guesses correctly.

~~001. my dad's weiner was bigger than mine then... and still is.~~
~~002. i've got tunnel vision but i'm doing fine.~~
~~003. just like a match you try to incinerate the lives of everyone you knew.~~
~~004. where were you when we were getting high?~~
~~005. hope is such a waste.~~
006. i should close all the schools just to make the kids smile.
007. your words walk right through my ears, presuming i like what i hear.
~~008. i took my thumb off the concrete.~~
~~009. 'cause turning to you is like falling in love when you're ten.~~
010. we went to the coffee/tea shop for our first date, and it started off great.

EDIT I'm super disappointed that no one has gotten number seven yet.
EDIT I'm super proud of KT. =D

a lame update

2006-07-16T18:41:37Z

Work is going well; I'm secured a job at the Game Stop in the strip mall across the street. Evan's a nice guy.

Been working with Shane pretty much all week. We watch movies and play video games.

I bought a new purse and three new video games, including Castlevania: Dawn of Sorrow and Viewtiful Joe: Double Trouble for the DS and Viewitful Joe 1 for the GC. I'm really excited. The GC game is super fun. I made Aaron cream his pants when I told him I had Castlevania. It's ridiculously hard to find, but we got it traded in about three days ago.

Really miss Jess, but she'll be back in a couple of days.

Performed at the Depot last Tuesday; plan on going again this Tuesday to perform some prose, if Lance doesn't fuck up and schedule me on Tuesday.

Picked up a Driver's Manual. Going to take the test before the end of the month, hopefully.

Um... Jess took me out to dinner at P. F. Chang's Thursday night. It was ridiculously good and ridiculously sweet of her.

I'm engaged. To Jess, obviously.

College isn't too far off.

And off to work I go ~

oleander__ @ 2006-07-02T12:12:00

2006-07-02T17:12:38Z

She is the only one who can make my world crumble so fast.

let me be with you

2006-06-21T07:56:08Z

Man, life is fucking crazy right now. So many extremes, late nights, no sleep, drunkenness, video games, perkins, sneaking around, ex-strippers with cat tattoos, and my cell phone doesn't charge anymore. It has a bad battery. I'll have to coerce someone to drive me to the Verizon store so I can swap it out for a new phone. Hopefully they'll be able to transfer all of my numbers and shit. I'm sure they can, I just think it's an extra fee.

Super Princess Peach is pretty much excellent beyond belief. The boss of the second world is an owl that drops eggs on you. The eggs are filled with tiny owl babies.

I got my new card; I'm super happy.

And seeing Ben + Sean + Maxwanderman + Sam Groshens + Dan at Perkins was flippin' sweet.

oleander__ @ 2006-06-11T20:25:00

2006-06-12T01:33:18Z

Purse was recovered; the janitors were cleaning up during graduation and just didn't tell anyone what they did with everybody's bags and stuff until the morning after. Everything was in there, but now I can only write checks until I get sent a new card. Oh well. At least everything's okay.

Graduation party was awesome. I was really surprised with how many people were there; it was crazy. My cousin Trevor bonded with Ian and Gayron over GBA. It was really cute. After the party, we went to Wendy's, and after thaaaat, Ian, Gayron, Sam and I hung out with Molly and Dave, and theeeeen Ian and Sam and I went to Ian's house and Ian and I played Dragon Ball Z Budokai 2. And he body-raped me. It was meeeeeaaan.

Got TONS of stuff for school! Molly bought me notebooks and pens and pencils and towels and sheets and flip-flops and it's awesome. The best present of all, though, was Erik's; he's a co-worker of my mom's, and he's really nice. He brought me a black leather box full of paper and a really nice pen and told me that I have to use the paper and the box for creative writing ONLY. And I guess there's a journal coming to match it, too. I wanted to cry; it was so sweet. I'm already putting the paper and pen to use, copying certain poems I have on my computer down onto paper. I love it so much.

Melody's present also rocked hardxcore: she burned me a shitload of CDs and made me a journal. It's very, very pretty. I'm excited to start using it.

Anyway... Um... Oh. Erik Nyberg's grad party was awesome. Ian and I hung out with Dylan Bauer, Jeremy Levine, and then KT, Tim O'Neil, and Noah showed up. We went to a park and hung out until Ian and I had to go.

And up for tomorrow? Helping Christine move, getting my DS LITE!!!, and working with Jimmy (booo). HOPEFULLY, Lance will be in the store before I start so I can get my DS. I was going to get it today, but I was unaware of company policy that states only a manager can ring up another employee's items. I was SHOT DOWN. Suuuucks. But hopefully tomorrow. I already have a game, though it's for GBA: Castlevania, Aria of Sorrow. Exciting, for real.

ELLIE I RECEIVED YOUR LETTER/CARD. Loved it. Word.

oleander__ @ 2006-06-09T00:03:00

2006-06-09T05:11:06Z

This night is in the top five of the worst nights of my life.

I lost my purse at graduation. It contained:
+ Soul Calibur III + memory card
+ my journal
+ my MP3 player
+ the story I was editing
+ my wallet, which had my check card, my social security card, and my state ID
+ my keys

I had to file a police report. Even if they find the purse, I'll probably never see any of these things again.

I'm so stupid. I hate people so much. I hate that this night was ruined for me because of that. I haven't stopped crying, really, for the past couple of hours. If someone did steal it, they currently have access to $1000, because you can use check cards as credit cards.

I know it's really trivial, and mostly material, but you have no idea what a slap in the face it is to lose so much. You never realize how much money is lying around in the bottom of your purse until you lose it all. There's over $1000 missing, if you think about it, with the money I have in my account. I'm cancelling the card in the morning, but then, how long will it be until I can access my money? And it takes three weeks to get a new ID. It'll probably take just as long for my credit union to send me a new check card. Then I have to replace my social security card.

I'm hoping that a teacher simply moved it someplace and forgot about it. I hope that I get a call from the police saying that a custodian found it, and it's in the lost and found. But I know people better than that; even if I find the purse again, nothing will be there.

I just... I just need to go to bed. I just need to be held for a really long time. I just need to not have to deal with anyone or anything right now, but of course I have more shit to do tomorrow, more people to deal with.

oleander__ @ 2006-06-03T21:44:00

2006-06-04T03:12:26Z

Soul Calibur III is amazingly fun, though much more difficult than the first. The fights have to be a little more strategized - no more mindless button-mashing. I really, really like Tira - her second costume? Cosplay worthy. We'll see where I'm at hair-wise once I hit college to see if I wanna try cosplaying her; the second costume is just so hot, though. And it'd be a relatively easy cosplay - even her weapon. It'd just be a hoola-hoop spray painted and cardboard covered in tin foil or silver fabric attached. Mmmm. I am so excited. I beat Talim's story mode quickly; Nightmare in his Soul Edge form was surprisingly easy to beat. I just kicked him to the edge and then slashed him. He went flying off the edge. The battle lasted maybe 20 seconds, if not less. It was amazing! I don't know how I feel about Chronicles of the Sword, yet, though; that mode of gameplay is just kind of like, what's the point? You get to create three original characters, but then you just control troops and it's too complicated, but maybe I'll give it a shot sometime. I just wanna focus on getting through everybody's story first. It's interesting to see how they all connect.

Anyway, enough game babble. High school is almost finished and I'm more deathly afraid and horribly excited. I just have to return my French IV books and I'll be cleared to get my cap and gown and graduation tickets. Easy enough. The last choir concert went AMAZING, but I'm a little disappointed that the DVD is pretty much unsellable. There are a lot of glitches, probably from bad burning, so we won't be able to buy copies. Though I hope the CD came out okay, because I'd like a copy of that. That whole night was a little overwhelming. There was so much to think about, but generally, I just opted to live in the moment instead of dwelling on the fact that it was my last concert at Hopkins. Afterwards, once I got home, I definitely broke down. It hit me all at once that the period is being put on this chapter in my life, and what's going to be written next is going to be brand new and exciting and daring and altogether frightening. No matter what, I'll make sure I charge into everything that shows up.

Last issue of the newspaper is done, too. I'm very, very proud of this last issue. It came together rather smoothly, and generally speaking, there weren't too many glaring errors (not like the yearbook - they forgot to add a girl's senior photo and put in one girl twice. they had to go through and glue the forgotten's girl picture into the right spot where they had put the doubled girl's in - how embarrassing, no?). I don't really have any copies of the old issues; I'll probably grab the ones in which I wrote the editorials, because I'm the most proud of those. The other stuff I wrote wasn't very important or interesting, in all honesty. Even though the editorials didn't have my name stamped on them, I feel like they represented me better than other articles did.

Um, what else? Payroll got fucked up so I got 12 extra hours paid for on this paycheck, but they're taking it out of my next one. Effers. But in general I'm getting more hours, so that makes me happy. Todd is getting another job and will probably only be at EB one night a week, and Jimmy got a second job telling people whose relatives just died that they need to set up a payment plan for their debts. Great job, right? So, considering the fact that Jeff is always busy with theater stuff, that means Lance will probably hire one other person for the summer, and it'll be me, him, and whoever he hires. Which means I will get more hours, which means that my numbers will probably be better, and that I will get more money. What a great chain of events.

Things are going well for me right now. I'm happy with how things are going, and even though I'm scared of what's coming, I know that everything will be fine. Better than fine.

turning 18 was...

2006-05-29T15:20:23Z

+ picnic at the Purple Dinosaur Park
    + swings!
    + tampons!
    + michael surprising me with a gift!
+ driving to US Grocery & Tobacco Shop
    + the lady wished me happy birthday
    + having to go back in for a lighter
+ going into antique shops in Downtown Hopkins
    + embroidered bags
    + harlequinn celloists
+ eating "milkshakes" at Holiday
    + i ate a lot of michael's
+ driving to Aaron's house for magic cards
    + his dad freaking out about duct tape
    + getting Magic Knight Rayearth 2
    + ew, basement smell
+ driving to Ian's house for games and HIS magic cards
    + telling his mom I can be a stripper
    + yelling, "get an A!" to Ian's brother/Whitney
+ driving BACK to Holiday to drop off Christine's croissant
    + Ian bought a shake
    + I ate a lot of that, too
+ going back to my house!
    + being confused that my mom was home
    + Diablo II, FF Tactics, FFVII, .hack//infection
    + DDR
    + shower with four boys in the house
+ going to dinner at Loring Pasta Bar
    + sitting up on the very top
    + watching the Tango Club dance
    + cheese tortellini
    + 3 shirley temples
    + FREE tiramisu
    + Randy dancing around
+ going to Randy's house for the first time
    + presents!
    + watching Hogan Knows Best
    + phone call from Jess
+ going home to find my girl waiting for me
    + her reading my own story to me
    + Fuze drink
    + tickle fights (and leading to...)
    + me accidentally falling asleep (and her holding me)

PRESENTS!
OMFGs: Playstation 2, memory card, Spider-Man and Spider-Man 2 games
Michael: Final Fantasy X-2
Grandparents: $20
Davies: bottle of Mountain Dew
Mom: $20, 2 shirts and a skirt
Randy: elephant plushie from Japan, 3 Japanese figurines
Jess: two cups, a book on Asian Art and a copy of White Oleander, and I guess there's something else, too... (I wonder what?)

CALLS!/TXTs
Cindy freshgreengrass
Ellie lostbuttons
Cori seeming_queer
Jess biased_opinions
Sam windy34
Sadie
Melody

♥ to all for making it a lovely day.