Melissa Hughes ([info]melissa_hughes_) wrote,
2006-01-11 11:32:00
  • Mood: relieved
  • Music: Clickety Clack
Hands wigged out.

Duh. We all should’ve seen that one coming. The guy was totally weird, but I guess I really didn’t think he’d freak on Shirley and try to kill her! I mean, dude. All I can say is thank god for those typing lessons. I can’t even imagine what would have happened . . . And here I was honestly going to make an effort to be nicer to him, I really was. I mean, I kind of owe him one, but maybe it’s just as well that I didn’t. Can I just say I was completely and utterly CREEPED OUT when he called me the hot secretary who makes him nervous? *shudders* But you know, it is unfair how the partners were treating him. I mean, Alan and I couldn’t have won that case without him. The guy is a genius. Everyone takes advantage of his super brain, and then just – poof! – disregards him when they don’t need him anymore. Uncool.

But whatever. I’m just still just trying to recover. I am happy for Mr. Chase though. He seems to fit in really well with the partners. It’s just too bad everybody can’t be a partner.

This is so the weirdest job I’ve ever had.

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  • 60 comments

[info]alan_shore

January 11 2006, 17:48:54 UTC 6 years ago

Melissa, you may want to consider that he's about as fond of the name "Hands" as you are of the designation "hot secretary who makes him nervous."

[info]melissa_hughes_

January 11 2006, 18:11:44 UTC 6 years ago

Oops. You're right. I guess he did make that clear during his . . . episode. I meant to say "Jerry wigged out." What's going to happen to him now? *she asks, partly out of concern for Jerry's well-being (after all, he did help her out of a bind) and partly out of concern that he won't be incarcerated immediately and therefore might still be sneaking around the office, and could appear at any moment, still harboring a grudge and a knife*

Oh, and before I forget, sorry for falling asleep in your office the other day. Won't happen again.

[info]alan_shore

January 12 2006, 00:04:39 UTC 6 years ago

We can expect attempted murder charges, along with whatever else Shirley sees fit to concoct. Should he be convicted...well, we all know how that story goes.

I apologize, by the way, for any distress the ordeal might've caused you. If it makes you feel better, I never got any cake.

*smiles* You're welcome to the couch any time. You're a much more tranquil sleeper than I am.

[info]melissa_hughes_

January 12 2006, 14:24:19 UTC 6 years ago

He can't go to jail. Oh god. Can you imagine Han - Jerry is jail! *thinks about it and looks horrified*

You don't need to apologize. You were the one who saved the day. That was great how you talked the knife right out of his hands - oops I mean, yeah. Funny how that word keeps coming up. You didn't miss much. I think the cake was just for looks. Too many calories anyway, Alan. *smiles*

Your couch is really really comfortable. But that reminds me, how is it . . . going? Those, you know, night things. Is it getting any better?

[info]alan_shore

January 12 2006, 22:08:52 UTC 6 years ago

*has already spent a great deal of time imagining just that scenario* Given his uncanny knowledge knowledge of the law and my not inconsiderable skills, it shouldn't come to that.

*pleased* I didn't save the day. I salvaged a few minutes. *sobers* What I meant was--and let me say first that these sorts of incidents are by no means typical--I'm sorry you came to work expecting to type and ended up fearing for your safety. You ought to petition Shirley for hazard pay.

*nods* It is, thank you for asking. I haven't been tempted take any running leaps from the balcony since Denny and I began sleeping together that night...for some time now.

[info]melissa_hughes_

January 13 2006, 16:08:23 UTC 6 years ago

I hope not. He just doesn't seem like the jail type. I know you'll get him off though. *smiles*

Yeah! *puts hands on hips* I should get hazard pay. Oh wait though, I guess I wasn't the only one in danger. And I heard this kind of thing happens a lot. Didn't you get held at gunpoint once? *raises eyebrows as if to ask, is that really true*

I'm glad to hear Denny is helping you. I'm sorry I couldn't . . . " shrugs and looks slightly regretful but tempers it with compassion. "But I'm really glad you're better."

[info]alan_shore

January 13 2006, 16:31:13 UTC 6 years ago

Thus incurring Shirley's wrath.

Yes, there was a rather tightly wound gentleman who believed negotiations for the return of his children might be conducted more expediently at the point of a pistol. It's not common occurrence.

Melissa, you did all you could. You endured what must have been a terrifying experience and you may well have saved my life. The only reason Denny fares any better is that he could sleep through a third World War. In any case, thank you.

[info]brad_chase

January 11 2006, 21:46:16 UTC 6 years ago

You're 'hot secretary who makes him nervous'. I'm a sub-standard partner. And I gave him the knife.

Besides, Paul told me someone said I'm a smiling Ken doll with an aggressive handshake. *rolls eyes* Wonder who that was.

[info]alan_shore

January 12 2006, 00:05:53 UTC 6 years ago

Wonder why Paul told you.

[info]brad_chase

January 12 2006, 00:24:48 UTC 6 years ago

Yeah, him being such a big fan of yours and all.

[info]alan_shore

January 12 2006, 03:20:42 UTC 6 years ago

Precisely. He's not the type to quote me for the sheer joy of it.

[info]brad_chase

January 12 2006, 04:06:16 UTC 6 years ago

It's what came after the quote. But I wouldn't worry about it. We all have our peccadillos. He keeps telling me I talk too fast.

[info]alan_shore

January 12 2006, 22:23:57 UTC 6 years ago

Nonsense. You only talk too fast if being understood is your goal.

Don't be a tease, Brad. What came after?

[info]brad_chase

January 13 2006, 09:56:01 UTC 6 years ago

*laughs* I'm an open book.

Says I should do something about you. Thinks you have one of those impulse control disorders. I think he used the word grandiosity. I said maybe he wants to be like - what - the Incredible Hulk doll?

[info]alan_shore

January 13 2006, 15:22:15 UTC 6 years ago

To think I've known Paul all this time and yet I never realized he was a psychologist. I must say, in addition, that I find it highly ironic he saw fit to pull aside the man whose violent impulses nearly landed him in prison recently in order to discuss my apparent lack of control.

The Incredible Hulk derived power from his anger. I'm more than capable of keeping mine in check.

[info]brad_chase

January 13 2006, 18:47:37 UTC 6 years ago

Alan, I'm hardly violent. By the way, still have your Batman and Robin action figures here?

[info]alan_shore

January 13 2006, 19:21:00 UTC 6 years ago

I do. They're up for partner next year.

[info]brad_chase

January 13 2006, 22:05:53 UTC 6 years ago

Holy Criminal Law Treatise 22 ARL 3rd R1228. To the Bat Docs. Hope Melissa still has the modified Partnership Agreement. Don't know if Rosenberg v. Kaplan will suffice, though.

[info]alan_shore

January 14 2006, 01:11:35 UTC 6 years ago

They're posable, they're well-dressed, they're good at parties. They should be a shoo-in; no need to resort to any of that pesky legal research. It's best left to associates with delusions of acceptance, anyway.

[info]brad_chase

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...and 24 more comments... from [info]brad_chase, [info]alan_shore, [info]mr_colbert Expand

[info]melissa_hughes_

January 12 2006, 14:30:46 UTC 6 years ago

No no no. Brad you were a seriously courteous winner. You reached out to him, and invited him in. Offering him the knife was a gesture of compassion and friendship, there's no way you could've known he was going to butcher the poor cake and terrorize everybody with it.

*laughs* You know, you do kind of look like - no, never mind.

[info]brad_chase

January 12 2006, 20:08:37 UTC 6 years ago

I understand that you were cool under pressure. Nice going. Hey - d'ya notice we both got defined by our exterior? Even in a roomful of highly educated colleagues. It's disappointing.

[info]melissa_hughes_

January 12 2006, 20:21:46 UTC 6 years ago

I recognized the situational dynamics and tried maintain a composed demeanor *pauses as if expecting an applause* Well, actually I was scared to death, but doing whatever he said seemed to be the best course of action. *then, smugly* I typed pretty well, didn't I?

Yes. That's exactly how people define us. Happens to blondes all the time. I mean, I know it comes with the turf when you've got a fabulous exterior, but I do get tired of it.

[info]brad_chase

January 12 2006, 20:36:50 UTC 6 years ago

*nods approvingly, trying to cap the smile* Y'know, presenting a calm front is a major tool for a hostage negotiator. You've got more than a few skills there.

You and I - we just need to keep proving we've got the smarts to back it up, but it's people like Jerry who pay the price of that prejudice. I mean - Alan hired you and I'm a partner now. *ironically* Tough life.

[info]melissa_hughes_

January 12 2006, 21:04:08 UTC 6 years ago

Wow, that's so sad *pauses for a few earnest moments to ponder the hapless plight of the non-beautiful*

Do you really think I'd make a good hostage negotiator? Oh, and congratulations by the way. I'm sure you'll make a totally great partner.

[info]brad_chase

January 12 2006, 21:22:07 UTC 6 years ago

Mind you, some people put their quirks to work for them. *Brad makes a nearly imperceptible head tilt toward to her bosses door* I'm not blind. There's an audience for everything.

No. *Brad believes in being straight forward* But a professional typist, yeah. *Shoving his hands in his pockets, he shrugs one shoulder* Thanks. Validation.
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