Holy crap, the internet!

I'm actually using the computer every once in a while again. Who knows, I might even post something interesting here occaisonally again! ...But don't get any ideas.

I dunno, not much interesting going on to talk about, really. My mom thinks I may have ADD after reading some article the other day, and since I tend to not do my work in a lot of classes. I read the article, and most of the stuff it mentions does seem to correlate with things I've noticed about myself, so she may be right. It would help me a lot to be more focused. I'm pretty scatterbrained most of the time, it feels like I don't have much control over my thoughts. I tried taking a dose of an all-day cousin to ritalin (Concerta) today, and I was able to actually sit down and type out my 4-page psychology paper in an hour or so. Plus, I could focus more when I was drawing, which was pretty nice.

I'm drawing more often. I'm happy about that. I want to start drawing a lot more, maybe actually get good at drawing the human body. Hopefully.

Sometime soon, I have to take a sample of my poop to a hardware store to color-match for paint. One of the last bits left to film for the Stupid Show DVD before it goes into post-production. Apparently Jason is getting his jaw wired shut pretty soon, which means we have to do the commentary soon. Hopefully that all works out.

School has been weird lately. I don't feel like I'm really doing anything, just kind of floating along from one day to the next. I don't get involved in a lot of the social aspects, which I regret. When I'm not working or drawing, I just kind of sit there and wait for the hour to end, watching everybody else to kill time. It's kind of depressing. I'm not good with people. Not at the first parts, anyway, which makes getting to the rest difficult. I'm not good at making small talk, or at making myself seem interesting. I don't really see myself as interesting, anyway. The friends I do have, I don't even remember how I got to know so well. I'm guessing they took the initiative when it came to getting to know each other, though. Most of the time, I really have no clue what to do in social situations. I don't ever know what to say, either, because there's never anything that I'm like "Hey, I wonder what this person thinks about blah blah blah" or "Did you hear..." etc. I'm never in close enough working conditions with the people I'm interested in getting to know to make that kind of conversation seem natural. I always get stuck by and with people I sort of know and don't really click with. But that's making excuses. Mostly, it's just that I'm not good with people.

I think I'm going to stop getting high before school. I want to start smoking less, and I figure that's a good place to start. I think I may just stop for school days in general. It's not as special anymore. I want to ensure that I don't start taking getting high for granted and let it become just another routine. It's part of this "fixing the mess I've made of myself" idea I've recently started to give some credit to.

This is longer than I was planning on typing, but oh well.