| Update. |
[Dec. 17th, 2008|09:45 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | bouncy | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Poppin' Champaign - All Time Low | ] |
Officially registered for Beauty School @ The McGee Brother's Manning Academy in Vancouver, Washington. Once I graduate, I'll have a national cosmetology license, and won't have to have as many hours if I were to go to school in Oregon. [1600 hours. I think.] I start January 6th, with Laura! I'm glad I have someone going with me, but I was going regardless, I'm sick of waiting.
Mexico was AMAZING. The guys there are really smooth. It's kind of creepy when you're not used to it. Mostly they just want your money though. Hahaha. :] Swam in the COLD ocean because it was so blistering hot. Drank alcohol, and I still hate it. I don't understand why people drink so much of it. It doesn't do anything for me. Meh. Mexico has a LOT of beautiful guys. Beautiful. Should be models. They all have their hair cut like Christiano Renaldo. It made me laugh. :]
Danika's wedding was REALLY beautiful. Everyone was dressed up and sitting on chairs waiting for the wedding to start, and people on the beach literally pulled up their chairs and watched in their bathing suits. Haha. I got a decent tan, and bought a LOT of things. I didn't take too many pictures because there are only so many pictures you can take of yourself on the beach with pink cheeks and sunglasses tan lines. ...I think I wrote that wrong. You get the point.
Kilee's friend Valerie from Australia is here! Met her today, and am really excited to get to know her more. Super nice, super funny. :] But now i have another person to get a christmas present that I can't afford. Oh well. Kilee, I think I might have to make a trip to American Apparel for your birthday present. I can't afford Betsey Johnson, sorry. haha. I hope Valerie likes her purse. It's just like ours! Yaaay.
I need to get my glasses adjusted. They don't sit right on my face because they're all crooked, and they're not tight enough. I CAN'T FIND MY TEAL HEADBAND. It was my favorite one. Maybe if I actually clean my room, I'll find it. Hah. |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[Oct. 11th, 2008|08:30 am] |
I've never noticed how ridiculously accident prone I am.
But in the past two weeks, I've electrocuted myself, and then last night, I somehow managed to pop my shoulder out of it's socket. Luckily, it went in again, but it wasn't fun. Still pretty sore. It felt disgusting.
Being electrocuted, feels exactly like it looks in cartoons. Afterwards you feel all buzzy. If that makes sense? It didn't even hurt.
Cereal time. |
|
|
| You change your mind, like a girl changes clothes. |
[Sep. 30th, 2008|03:23 am] |
| [ | music |
| | Hot N Cold - Katy Perry | ] |
I don't get some people.
I've never been around someone who had such an obvious eating disorder.
This whole weekend, after we ate, the girl we were with would go to the bathroom.
After three days, it was obvious.
Especially with, "Oh, I don't feel good. I think I have to go to the bathroom." To throw up all the food I just ate. If you're THAT scared of getting fat, then DO something about it other than throw up.
How can you like yourself if you do that? It's so gross.
Finally after two days of her faking being sick, and complaining my sister said, "MAYBE IF YOU'D QUIT THROWING UP, YOU WOULDN'T FEEL SO SICK. YOU NEED SOMETHING IN YOUR STOMACH."
She was trying to make it obvious. It's just like... I don't even know.
----------
Also, I've discovered our song is for sure, "Hot N Cold" by Katy Perry.
You change your mind like a girl changes clothes.
Yeah you, PMS like a bitch, I would know.
You over think, always speak critically.
I should know, you're no good for me.
Cause you're hot then you're cold.
You're yes then you're no.
You're in then you're out.
You're up and you're down.
You're wrong when it's right.
It's black and it's white.
We fight, we break up.
We kiss, we make up.
You don't really want to stay, no.
But you don't really want to go. |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[Sep. 25th, 2008|01:28 am] |
| [ | music |
| | Until You're Mine - Demi Lovato | ] |
I have so many things I want to buy.
I've been really busy lately trying to catch up with people. I've spent almost 100$ this past weekend/week. Which is lame. I wanted to put it in the bank/buy MY BOOTS. But alas.
I get to go shopping with my mommy this weekend, because I'm in desperate need of new clothes. I probably haven't REALLY got new clothes since the middle of senior year. I've gotten things here and there, but not like you used to when you were in school. You know what I mean.
I need to still buy my tickets, and I want those boots. BAD. I finally figured out where to get them in electric blue. [KitsonLA.com] Although, they're 200$. I want them that bad though.
I also want to buy some black ray bands. But I've seen some other cool colors. I like the traditional black though.
Who am I? I'm beginning to like fashion and brands way too much for my own good. I just about peed my pants when Vogue came in the mail on Monday. My heart skips a beat every time I see something I really want.
I also need to get some REAL red lipstick. I almost have to with my hair.
-----------
Laura Laughery [does anyone remember her? I graduated with her.] works at the salon my sister works at. She's the receptionist. We were talking about Beauty School, and she's decided to go with me. We called the school to possibly schedule an appointment for our interviews. We're going to start FOR SURE THIS TIME, in January. I can't wait. She's really awesome. We're going to make each other go every day, and we're going to car pool. Haha.
We shared a cigarette and talked about stupid high school friends, and how much we can't wait to get started in January. We decided that we won't let anyone else but each other cut our hair.
----------
My Mom finally gets home tomorrow. I can't wait.
My hair is so blonde. It kind of freaks me out. I keep forgetting it.
I'm getting lunch with Mallory tomorrow, possibly. But I have to clean the whole house.
---------
I can't wait for my people magazine on Friday. BAHAHA. Like no one knew you were gay. Idiot. BIG SHOCKER.
---------
Got Demi Lovato's new CD. I still don't know what to really think of it. The duet with the Jonas Brothers... sucks. It just sounds really 90's. Her whole album does actually. But her voice is so friggin' amazing it's ridiculous. I'm so jealous of her. |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[Sep. 14th, 2008|11:00 pm] |
| [ | music |
| | Now That We're Done - Metro Station | ] |
I was just thinking about not being friends with people who used to be like sisters to me. It's weird to see pictures of them smiling and having fun, and then realize we haven't even talked in a year. Really talked.
It makes me sad, but on the other hand, if they/I really wanted them in my life, I would've made an effort. Right? Maybe not.
I try to see people as worth while people, when they're being REAL. But it's hard. It's even harder to forget them, or to not like them when you knew them so well. Some people it's easier to feel that for. Mostly not though.
I can't wait this chapter to be over already. I'm over it, and it makes me sad. |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[Sep. 13th, 2008|08:44 pm] |
Okay. Guilty pleasure, "Bottom Of The Ocean," by Miley Cyrus. I know, I know. It doesn't even sound like her.
-----------
My dad's birthday yesterday was horrible. My sister and I couldn't stop fighting. She always has to be in control, and if someone doesn't want to do what she wants to do, then there's hell to pay. But that mostly only applies to me. She wanted to go to eat somewhere, and none of us could decide where we wanted to go. I didn't want to go anywhere. My dad was fine with that, and I was fine with that. If they wanted to go to dinner, go ahead, I don't feel like it. Not a big deal. She made it into a big deal, then we fought via text messages. [Yes, I realize how childish this is.] Then she took a nap, and by then, my dad didn't want to go anywhere. Obviously. So I offered to make dinner. Then Gabrielle woke up and made a big stink about going out to eat somewhere again.
In the end, I just made dinner, and it was great. Then Gabrielle and I went to a movie. [The Women.] Which, was horrible, but she liked it. and I had to pay. Thanks, for "taking" me to the movies.
-----------
Made my dad pineapple upside down cake, today, for a late birthday present. [It's his favorite.] It was from scratch. Way better than a box. I was going to make whipped cream too. But I don't drive, and it was a surprise. Better than nothing, I suppose.
-----------
I feel sick today. I hate it. |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[Sep. 12th, 2008|05:46 pm] |
I wish I could talk on here. The way I need to and want to.
Kilee is such a good friend.
This post is pointless. |
|
|
| Blah, blah, blah. |
[Sep. 9th, 2008|07:05 pm] |
| [ | music |
| | Suffragette City - David Bowie | ] |
I'm going to learn how to sew, if it kills me.
My grandma Lewis was a seamstress her entire life. My mom always says that her work was flawless, that she could sew almost anything. She designed and made her own patterns. I know it's probably not easy. But my mom SHOULD be of help. Since she worked as a seamstress for a while when she was my age.
When my grandma died, she had two sewing machines, obviously vintage, and left them to my sister and I. My sister took sewing in high school, she can at least make herself a purse if she wanted to. My mom can sew dresses, and tops, and anything she puts her mind to. What's the point in having this amazing old sewing machine, if I can't even use it. I wouldn't know how to sew a button on if my life depended on it.
---------------
My house has been so hot today. My dad always refuses to put on the AC. He left finally for one of his meetings, so I'm blasting it. It's actually comfortable now. Gah.
---------------
My mom's birthday today. I've only talked to her for about ten minutes. :/
I still don't know what to get my dad/when I could get him something. |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[Sep. 8th, 2008|10:17 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  pensive | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Message In A Bottle - The Police | ] |
1. Got my clothes in the mail today.
2. Got my Cobra ticket today.
3. I really need to clean my room.
4. I think I'm going to bed.
5. I like Limeade.
6. I wish I could buy things for people, I was looking around, and I wanted to buy like, 923874923874 million things so I could give them to people I know. Monique keeps telling me I want to give away too many things.
7. I'm waiting for my paycheck. Hopefully, I'll buy more clothes/concert tickets. No. Damn. I need to save $ for Merch. I forgot. Two months Kilee. EEK. |
|
|
| Ah. I can't WAIT. |
[Sep. 8th, 2008|03:31 pm] |
| [ | music |
| | Wish We Were Older - Metro Station | ] |
"Now that we're done, I'm so sorry. Why did I lie? I'm so sorry. I know I hurt you. I know I hurt you."
Kilee. You have no idea, HOW EXCITED I AM, for all of our concerts. I need to go buy my ticket for Cobra! I'll make my dad go shopping with me today, we need to get food anyway. ;]
Oh, and the Metro Station concert is in November, the other ones are in October. I leave like three days after Metro Station, but I'm for SURE going. I'm kind of obsessed with them right now. Thanks. Haha. |
|
|
| Read. If you want. |
[Sep. 8th, 2008|01:25 am] |
| [ | music |
| | My Blue Heaven - Taking Back Sunday | ] |
All humans of the male variety;
wtf, dudes.
You flirt with girls, they play hard to get, you flirt harder.
They finally flirt back, and you completely ignore them and stop talking to them.
You say, "I miss you so much." We don't say it back, you say it THREE MORE TIMES.
We say we miss you too, finally, and you again ignore us and stop talking to us.
Does this have an obvious pattern yet? Does this make ANY sense what so ever?
You hold hands with us, then literally walk away ten minutes later, and never acknowledge it again.
Oh yes, and then you claim to not have feelings like that for us. This makes us sad. Beyond belief sad.
Yet, WE are the stupid ones. I'll tell you and us why; because we stick around, devoted to you, unknown to you, or even ourselves for almost two years. Two years of nothing. Of stupid friendship that isn't really a friendship.
---------------
I'm angry that I keep falling into the same pattern, with the same damn person. The worst thing is he doesn't even know. Or if he does, he doesn't acknowledge it. Which, honestly, I don't blame him. But it is frustrating being pulled back and forth over and over again for almost two years straight.
That's what I call stupid, stupid, STUPID LOVE. On my part anyway.
I'm angry that I've promised to write him while he's being STUPID. I'm angry that he sends me <3's, and tells me he misses me constantly. I'm angry that I believe him. I'm angry that I buy into this stupid, shit. [For lack of a better word.] I'm angry, and sad that this relationship has been unrequited for two years.
Doesn't that mean anything? That while other stupid high school girls are graduating, and going to college and forgetting about you, that I'll be moving on with life too, but you'll be with me? That I'm the one that's going to write to you? That I'm the one who CARES that you've made one of the stupidest choices? That I'm the one who you've stamped on, not even knowing, but I continue to let you use me as a doormat?
I'm not going to say I'm not going to be there for you, because I know that I'd just be lying to myself. I'm so sick of being so god damned melodramatic about all of this! I just don't want to have to think about this for another second, but for all that I have, I can't think of ANYTHING else!
NEWSFLASH: WHILE YOU GO OVER SEAS, AND TRAVEL THE DAMN WORLD, NONE OF YOUR STUPID HIGH SCHOOL FRIENDS WILL BE WRITING YOU. MAYBE ONE OR TWO WILL WRITE AT FIRST, BUT IT'LL DWINDLE OFF. YOU'RE NOT HERE ANYMORE. THEY WON'T REMEMBER YOU IN THEIR STUPID LITTLE INSIGNIFICANT LIVES. ALL YOU'LL BE IS A MEMORY IN A YEARBOOK, AND A SIGNATURE NEXT TO A PICTURE OF SOMEONE THEY CAN'T EVEN REMEMBER TALKING TO.
I don't say this out of being mean, or angry, or upset, even while I admit I am all of those things. I say it because it happens to 90% of people who graduate from high school. I don't even talk to some of my best friends from that stupid shack anymore. Not because I don't want to, but because we don't fit in each other's lives anymore. Our friendship is a memory, a signature and an inside joke written in sharpie in the back of a yearbook. The only thing we ever had in common was that we went to the same school.
Why isn't it the same with you? Maybe because you're still in high school. I don't think so though. Maybe I've just convinced myself that I somehow meant more to you than being the editor of a section of the high school newspaper you were a part of. But I can't find any other reason for you still contacting me and you making a point of talking to me.
"It's you I can't deny." |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[Sep. 6th, 2008|11:57 pm] |
| [ | music |
| | I Must Be Dreaming - The Maine | ] |
GAH.
I really wish I had cable. I really wanted to see the VMAs.
Russell Brand is my hero. Almost better than Dane Cook. ALMOST. |
|
|
| Let's Call It A Day |
[Sep. 6th, 2008|05:30 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  accomplished | ] |
| [ | music |
| | My Worst Nightmare - Forever The Sickest Kids | ] |
Well I have about 10 CDs left to import. My back is killing me. I need to get an actual computer chair.
I love, love, love; Forever The Sickest Kids, Landon Pigg. I haven't really had time to go through all the songs on every CD.
Okay. I'm about to pass out. |
|
|
| This is completely sincere. |
[Sep. 5th, 2008|10:40 pm] |
| [ | music |
| | Run This City - Jet Lag Gemini | ] |
I don't think I've ever felt more comfortable at someone's house before. Kilee, I want to be in your family. :]
I talk too much. I feel selfish for how many times I've said I in my entries.
I love my damn head bands.
I'm importing TWENTY EIGHT CDs. Do you know how much friggin' music that is? It. Is. Awesome.
I think when my mom left, they took everything in the fridge. Today, I've had a muffin and a rockstar. wtf.
I hate myspace. I haven't talked to anyone on there in a while. Except a few people. So no one even acknowledges me on there anymore. Blah. I don't know if I care or not.
I've sat WAY too much today.
I've said, "I," way too much in this post.
P.S. Kilee, I love everything I've listened to so far. Thank you so much! |
|
|
| Complaining. |
[Sep. 5th, 2008|03:19 am] |
| [ | music |
| | Violet Hill - Coldplay | ] |
1. My hair looks yellow. No one else can tell, but I can. I need to get it done again. I only got it partially done. wtf.
2. I'm feeling overly self conscious as of lately. As in don't want to leave the house self conscious.
3. I can't sleep.
4. My hand writing used to be good. My hand writing is bad now. I don't know why.
5. I don't know how to write a decent letter, I've had no practice in the past six months, I'm freaking out for NO REASON.
6. I'm sad. |
|
|
| If you love me, won't you let me go? |
[Sep. 3rd, 2008|06:25 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  pessimistic | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Violet Hill - Coldplay | ] |
"I took my love down to Violet Hill. There we sat in snow. All that time, she was silent still. So if you love me, won't you let me know? If you love me, won't you let me know?"
----------------------------------
I honestly have been trying REALLY hard to not be so melodramatic all the damn time. I'm annoying even myself. It's ridiculous.
But, my heart is severely bruised, and I can't stop obsessing about it. If I do somehow get distracted, I'm alright, but otherwise, it's all I think about. I just want to scream at everyone, and cry about nothing. I'm trying to not be so poopy. I want to talk to him all the time, but I have nothing to say. If I do/did, all I'd be able to talk about is Navy.
How long did you sign up for? Do you want to do that for a career? What the hell were you thinking? Why aren't you scared? Why are you doing this? What's the address for boot camp? What do I write to you about?
Why did I tell him I'd write. I don't want to anymore.
I'm wearing one of my head bands alone in my dark room. I have Violet Hill on repeat because in some way makes me numb instead of sad. I'm cold.
Maybe if I sleep, I won't think so much, or be so melodramatic. Hah. |
|
|
| OMFG. |
[Sep. 2nd, 2008|11:37 pm] |
| [ | music |
| | Violet Hill - Coldplay | ] |
MY HEADBANDS COME TOMORROW.
MY HEADBANDS COME TOMORROW.
MY HEADBANDS COME TOMORROW.
MY HEADBANDS COME TOMORROW.
MY HEADBANDS COME TOMORROW.
MY HEADBANDS COME TOMORROW.
MY HEADBANDS COME TOMORROW.
I WANT TO WEAR THEM.
INFACT, THEY'RE IN PORTLAND RIGHT NOW. I GET THEM EAAAARRRLYYY TOMORROW, I HOPE.
I think I'm addicted to shopping online.
Someone get me a credit card, then I'll be in debt up to my eyes.
My shopping addiction is only warding off sadness temporarily.
SOMEONE WEAR MY HEADBANDS WITH ME.
Please? |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[Sep. 2nd, 2008|09:23 pm] |
Hey, I need your opinion on what to do with my hair. I am getting bored with it. You can look at my pictures to see what it looks like right now. I don't know whether I should put more blonde in, or go all the way blonde, or put red in it, or go all the way brunette. I need help! lol
Thank you so much love. How have you been?
Uh, you do realize this is a consultation that I should charge you for?
Oh, then don't worry about it sweetie. :]
--------
I'm going to choke the next bitch that's two years younger than I am that calls me sweetie. Or anyone who calls me sweetie that's my age. Or even less than ten years older than I am.
asdl;kfjasncownas. PullyourheadoutofyourrearWHITNEY. |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[Aug. 29th, 2008|10:22 pm] |
| [ | music |
| | Tear Drops On My Guitar - Taylor Swift | ] |
I've just come to realize, I'm not good at networking.
My sister is good at networking, that's why her phone is ringing off the hook. Not that I want my phone to ring of the hook. But I'd like to stay in contact with more people than I do now.
Caleb, I never talk to anymore. Which is ridiculous, and I should be ashamed of myself for.
Kristin, I've just let drift without fear of even loosing her friendship. Again, with the shame.
Stephanie, I text once in a while, but I've given up on trying to have get togethers in general, so I don't see Jenece either.
I miss Beth a lot. I don't have her phone number anymore since I lost my phone. I feel like I'm missing out on something big. I hope she's okay.
I miss Christina. I know I was never super close, but I wish I was at least in contact with her.
I finally texted Melissa back. I saw her the other day. Everyone deserves a second chance, I suppose.
-----------
Happy birthday, boy. I'll miss you when you're gone, and yes, I'm aware we haven't been in the same room for over a year now. You are still a mystery to me.
-----------
My dad made a point of trying to talk to me while everyone was gone today. He explained things to me about the military, let me ask questions. I'm not sure if it made me feel any better. I still feel sick to my stomach. I'm trying hard to not be so melodramatic, but I apparently can't help myself.
I told my dad I'd promised him I'd write him, and send him at least one care package. "If you told him you'd do it, you'd better do it. It's pretty lonely for a while."
My dad is the best man I know.
I want to wear my head bands. Marco head bands?! |
|
|
![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small}
loverface______'s journal