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i'm tired of this smile

that even I don't reconize

Created on 2003-08-20 18:17:07 (#1269549), last updated 2003-08-23

30 comments received, 0 comments posted

Basic Account [Gift]

6 Journal Entries, 0 Tags, 0 Memories, 0 Virtual Gifts, 1 Userpic

Basic Info

Name:	kayla
Birthdate:	05-19

Bio

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<div align="justify"> <center>(( MUCH LiKE SUFFiCATiNG ))
// THiS iS ME WITH THE WORDS ON THE TiP OF MY TONGUE ..// </center>

<left> well, let me start by saying my name is kayla regina. my candles are blown out on may 19, 1988. which makes me fifteen at the moment. i was born, raised and still reside in upstate new york in a small town. i live with my step mom [dina], my dad, [john], my two step sisters [amanda; 9], [shannon; 13] and one step brother [johnathan; 8]. we're moving on june 30, 25 minutes away from where we are now, that i also means i have to switch schools. i have 3 natural sisters [angela; 23], [erica; 21] [missy; 21] who live in their own apartmant with my oldest sisters boyfriend [josh] whom is like my brother. i just finished my freshman year, which means in my new school, i'll be a sophmore. i have brown hair, that i dye very often i've dyed it red, blonde, light blonde, pink, blue, light brown [more lighter then my ORiGiNAL color] and black. right now, it's black. i'm very short. i weigh 95 pounds, before you ask, no, i do not have an eating disorder. i have a disability. when i was born, i had a bleed on the brain and some extra tissue which caused me to not be able to walk on my own. i can walk with quad canes and a walker and i'm just as normal as any other fifteen year old girl in this world. as of now, i'm not concentrating on my walking as much as i should be. truthfully, i'm lazy. i'm putting my education, family, music [i'll talk more about that later] and friends before walking on my own. i'm fine with the way i am, it's me. i would love to go to college at syracuse university for FF66CCgraphic design, but my REAL passion is singing and songwriting. when i was about 1O, i started writing song lyrics and poetry. then, when britney came out, i wanted to be just like her. that's ALL i ever wanted. up until i was fourteen and my family wasn't even supportive of what i wanted to do, only giving <strike>negative</strike> comments when i used to sing for them. i kind of just gave up on trying to be a star. i knew that i had to get a real job eventually and that stardom only happens when you're super pretty, or you have a super beautiful voice, so, i got into graphic design, even though i can't do it well, it's one of my biggest intrests and i would love to go to college with it. don't get me wrong. i'll ALWAYS love singing, but, i just don't feel like i have the talent, i still write and i also sing A LOT. [all the time.. lol] i'm not a high achiever, but i do care about school, i don't give my all, but i do give a lot of effort. </left>

<center> (iN OUR FAMiLY PORTRAiT, WE LOOK PRETTY HAPPY WE LOOK PRETTY NORMAL .. )
// DEFiNATELY THE DEFiNiTiON OF DiSFUNCTiONAL // </center>

<left> my mom and my dad never divorced as many of you may think due to the fact that i have a step mom. she passed away in 2OOO of a four year battle of <strike>lung cancer</strike>. before she had to deal with this battle, she had to deal with alcoholism and depression. she never got along with any of her sisters nor her mother. my dad stood by her side every inch of the way. my mother was my best friend. she was an amazing person, everyone knew her as someone special and that will never change. my mom is one in a million. we all took her death hard. it was a HUGE slap in the face. my dad definately got lonely and needed to find someone new. [not that he would ever forget my mom, she always wanted him to get remarried. she wanted him to be happy] he ended up finding dina, my new step mom. after two months of living with us, they ended up getting married. my sisters don't really care for dina and at times either do i, but i try to make the best of what i have. i am very close with my dad's side of the family, but, not my mom's. we haven't talked to them since my mom's funeral. as bitchy as this sounds. i don't want to. i don't get along with my step syblings, besides shannon. they're liars and cry babies. i guess every little kid is. when i was born, my mom had a very close friend and he was there for me since the day i was born. he's not my uncle really, but, he was my mom's best friend and he's taken care of me all my life [money, emotional and physically wise.. he's very wealthy] i battle depression. people think that i do it for attention, but, i don't. i cry A LOT. i often think of suicide so i write a lot to vent and prevent it. i take anti depressants. [thank god]. </left>

<center>((POSSE?))
// LiE about it, CRY about it, lean on ME, i'll lean on YOU and we'll be OKAY .. //</center>
<left> my friends mean the world to me. i have many friends. i don't label people as my 'best friend' because i just don't. it's wrong, in my opinion. i tend to hang out with more guys then girls, guys are fun and girls cause way to much drama for my liking.</left>

<center> ((ROCK ON))
// i'm SiCK of WRiTiNG every song about YOU .. // </center>
<left> avril lavigne; ashanti; 5O cent; jayz; missy elliot; eminem; obie trice; alanis morrisette; 2pac; lil kim; trina; all american rejects; finch; the used; graystar; fabolous; matchbox 2O; box car racer; blink 182; busta; mariah carey; aaron carter; lindsay pagano; usher; dave matthews band; counting crows; john mayer; justin timberlake; michelle branch; jessica harp; faith hill; dixie chicks; bon jovi; hanson; frankie j; alicia keys; pdiddy; notorious big; kelly osbourne; ozzy; christina aguilera; something corporate; nelly; acdc; allman brothers; slipknot; korn; thursday; better than ezra; dashboard confessional; good charlotte; new found glory; christina christian; kelly clarkson; switchfoot; mandy moore; ja rule; lil mo; vita; seether; from autumn to ashes; taking back sunday; clay aiken; jessica harp;jennifer lopez

<center>((LiVEJOURNAL))</center>
<left> my old livejournal user name was trapp3d given to me by kristal. i got quite sick of it and decided to make a new username [holla_] it is currently friends only and will definately stay that way. please don't add me first. comment and then add me. i make ssome entries public, but most are friends oonly. i do read your journals, i just don't like to comment, i think it's overrated . i talk about drug use and sex, don't like it? don't read it. i recently got my webcam hooked up, i do post a lot of pictures, don't like it? see, that little x ion the top? yeah, click that. i'm not a bitch, just sick of being walked all over.</left>

<center> ((<3)) </center>
<left> 50 cent, a walk to remember, abercrombie, almost famous, american eagle, american idol, angels, aol, ashanti, avril lavigne, bacon, bad boys, beaches, boardwalks, boys, broadway, bubble baths, bubbles, bush, cameras, candles, candy, carson daly, cds, cell phone covers, cell phones, cherry, chips, christina aguilera, christina christian, christmas, clubbing, comfy, computers, concerts, cuddling, dances, dancing, dashboard confessional, dave matthews band, dawsons creek, daydreaming, de lucia estate, dreams, drummers, dylan alexander, eminem, emo, <font.color=FF66CC>florida, french, french toast, full house, gap, getting high, giving, glitter, glitz, goo goo dolls, graphics, hanson, hersheys, hot choclate, hot showers, hotness, hugs, ice cream, islands, italy, jacob tyler, jaime, james vanderbeek, jessica harp, john mayer, joshua david, joshua jackson, julia stiles, katie holmes, kiss fm, kisses, laptops, layouts, legally blonde, leonardo dicaprio, lighthouses, long drives, mac makeup, maine, matchbox 20, michelle branch, milk, mp3s, music, my bed, my family, my friends, my name, new york city, no doubt, norah jones, oceans, orange juice, pancakes, paris, partying, pasta, phones, poop, popsicles, poptarts, powerpuff girls, real world, rent, road rules, rob thomas, rockstars, salsa, sand, sandals, santana, sexiness, shane west, singing, skittles, sleeping, slow dances, slushies, spongebob sqaurepants, steve madden, strawberry daquris, sugar cult, summer, summer nights, swearing, swimming, swinging, switchfoot, the get up kids, the mall, titanic, triple x, vin desil, virginia, waffles, warm towels, water, weed, whipped cream </left>

<center> <s> <3 </s> </center>
<left><strike>hoes</strike>, liars, haters, racism, school, waking up early, going to bed early, alarm clocks, some country music, players, cleaning, doing school work, being yelled at, crying, people who think they're tough, the future, posers, wannabes, copiers, crying, her math + global teacher, shaker cheerleaders, tough, guys, pricks, people who wear TOO much make up, homework, people who TRY to sing the words to songs they don't know, cooked carrots, fighting with my family, my mom's side of the family, labels, backstreet boys, being cold, waiting outside for the bus, having to get up at 5:45, having my batteries run out in my cd player, how my dad locks his door when he doesn't need to</left>

<center> ((SHE iS)) </center>
<left> depressed; sad; spoiled; bitchy; insecure; funny; talkative; special; different; kind; understanding; generous; flirty; hurt; negative ; loveable; lazy; stupid; opinionated; crazy; suicidal; dramatic; hopeful, obsessive </left>

<img src="http://www.boomspeed.com/slimshadyx1/jen143.jpg" alt="i love you, jen!" />

<center> ((FAVORiTES)) </center>
<left> numbers: 7, 1
 colors: pink, red, black
 food: steak, chicken, cheeseburgers, bagels, pizza, junk food, fries
 candy: sour skittles, skittles, lollipops, nerds, hersheys, lifesavers
 drinks: pepsi, wild cherry pepsi, dr pepper, root beer, cherry coke, shirley temples, snapple(kiwi strawberry or lemon iced tea), ice tea
 stores: hollister, abercrombie, american eagle, delias, hot topic, macys, rampage, the limited, alloy
 sports: baseball, cheerleading + dance
 movies: xXx, 8 mile, crossroads, cruel intentions, grease, clueless, almost famous, a walk to remember, the fast + the furious, romeo + juliet, pretty woman, big daddy, fear, leagally blonde, save the last dance, swim fan, mr. deeds, what a girl wants
 shows: dismissed, lizzy mcguire, anything on mtv, even stevens,boy meets world saved by the bell, beverly hills 90210, seventh heaven
 actresses: brittany murphy, julia stiles, reese witherspoon, katie holmes
 actors: shane west, jimmy fallon, hayden christensen, brad pitt, adam sandler, ryan phillipe, vin diesel, joshua jackson, james vanderbeek

<center> (( MY iNSPiRATiON <3 )) </center> <left> my inspiration is christina aguilera. she has an amazing voice, she's a great dancer and she's been through a lot of shit. if you're just going to add me because you wanna start shit about xstina, DON'T DO IT i won't stand for it. it's just so childish to have someone make fun of someone mostly because of jealousy.

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